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SNIPER was bored. So what if monsters had begun attacking the city again? There was nothing he could do about it. If those other stupid idiots he sometimes called his friends wanted to try to stop them, let them. He didn't want to go looking for any stupid sword.
__________
"So where the hell has SNIPER gone now?" asked Your Honour, turning to the other members of the party.
Grix shrugged, there were much bigger things to worry about than the whereabouts of SNIPER.
Ant however had seen SNIPER disappear, so decided to speak up "Well, he said we were a bunch of stupid morons trying to find this sword, and went off that way." Ant pointed towards a meadow.
"Well if he doesn't care about our homes being destroyed and us being enslaved then so be it. I do, and I vow to find the Sword of Nogard, and slay those foul beasts that attack our homes!" Cried Your Honour, and the three of them set off into the forest.
___________
SNIPER continued to wander through the meadow, it was a beautiful day, the suns were bright and the sky clear. Walking through the waist high grass amongst the butterfly was something that always helped to cheer SNIPER up. Maybe he should catch up with his friends he thought, and he too headed for the forest.
___________
pb marched up to FantasyMeister. "You can't keep sending our men out to die! We only have limited resources, and cannot fight them out there in the fields!"
"Then what would you suggest pb, letting those beasts inside our city walls, letting them slaughter our wives and feed on our children?" Replied FM looking down on pb.
"But we cannot hold out forever. We need help!" said pb shaking his head, as he walked away.
___________
SNIPER's mood had again changed for the worse. Where were those stupid idiots now? SNIPER looked round to see something catching the light in a clearing nearby. Maybe it was his friends! He ran into the clearing.
Moments later he realised that it was not his friends in the clearing, but something much more special. Stuck in the ground was a sword. The sword of Nogard! As SNIPER approached it he suddenly felt a chill in the air. The skies had clouded over, and the wind had picked up to such an extent that the trees creaked. If SNIPER could retrieve the sword, he would be a hero! No more would he be laughed at!
SNIPER grabbed the sword and pulled with all of his might. He could feel the first drops of a violent rain storm lash against his face. Still he pulled on the sword, until it gave up it's hold on the ground. SNIPER could feel great power within him as he held it.
He held it toward the skies as a sign of victory.
_____________
Grix didn't like this change in the weather. Not one bit. Why had it changed so suddenly? He could feel something strange in the air. "That way!" He cried, pointing towards a clearing nearby as thunder crashed in his ears and lightning lit up the skies.
_____________
"Aaaarghhhh!" Cried SNIPER as he was thrown to the ground. A lightning bolt had struck the sword and flowed through his body.
_____________
Your Honour was the first into the clearing. "It's SNIPER" he said, "Or at least it was...." he said, looking at the charred remains of his former companion.
"It looks as if we weren't the first at the scene" Said Ant, pointing towards some footprints leading out of the clearing. Next to these was a strange track, much like that that would be left be a sword, being dragged through grass........
__________
"So where the hell has SNIPER gone now?" asked Your Honour, turning to the other members of the party.
Grix shrugged, there were much bigger things to worry about than the whereabouts of SNIPER.
Ant however had seen SNIPER disappear, so decided to speak up "Well, he said we were a bunch of stupid morons trying to find this sword, and went off that way." Ant pointed towards a meadow.
"Well if he doesn't care about our homes being destroyed and us being enslaved then so be it. I do, and I vow to find the Sword of Nogard, and slay those foul beasts that attack our homes!" Cried Your Honour, and the three of them set off into the forest.
___________
SNIPER continued to wander through the meadow, it was a beautiful day, the suns were bright and the sky clear. Walking through the waist high grass amongst the butterfly was something that always helped to cheer SNIPER up. Maybe he should catch up with his friends he thought, and he too headed for the forest.
___________
pb marched up to FantasyMeister. "You can't keep sending our men out to die! We only have limited resources, and cannot fight them out there in the fields!"
"Then what would you suggest pb, letting those beasts inside our city walls, letting them slaughter our wives and feed on our children?" Replied FM looking down on pb.
"But we cannot hold out forever. We need help!" said pb shaking his head, as he walked away.
___________
SNIPER's mood had again changed for the worse. Where were those stupid idiots now? SNIPER looked round to see something catching the light in a clearing nearby. Maybe it was his friends! He ran into the clearing.
Moments later he realised that it was not his friends in the clearing, but something much more special. Stuck in the ground was a sword. The sword of Nogard! As SNIPER approached it he suddenly felt a chill in the air. The skies had clouded over, and the wind had picked up to such an extent that the trees creaked. If SNIPER could retrieve the sword, he would be a hero! No more would he be laughed at!
SNIPER grabbed the sword and pulled with all of his might. He could feel the first drops of a violent rain storm lash against his face. Still he pulled on the sword, until it gave up it's hold on the ground. SNIPER could feel great power within him as he held it.
He held it toward the skies as a sign of victory.
_____________
Grix didn't like this change in the weather. Not one bit. Why had it changed so suddenly? He could feel something strange in the air. "That way!" He cried, pointing towards a clearing nearby as thunder crashed in his ears and lightning lit up the skies.
_____________
"Aaaarghhhh!" Cried SNIPER as he was thrown to the ground. A lightning bolt had struck the sword and flowed through his body.
_____________
Your Honour was the first into the clearing. "It's SNIPER" he said, "Or at least it was...." he said, looking at the charred remains of his former companion.
"It looks as if we weren't the first at the scene" Said Ant, pointing towards some footprints leading out of the clearing. Next to these was a strange track, much like that that would be left be a sword, being dragged through grass........
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Sheepy sat on the floor crying.
"Did you REALLY have to take the mick out of his speaking problem? You KNOW he has trouble with his ff's... DAMN! Now you've got me doing it!"
Sheepy sobbed some more.
--------------
Grix checked what else Venombyte wrote.
---------------
Sniper stepped into the garage... and saw...
"Wow! A Delorean!"
Sniper walked up to the film poster of Back To The Future.
"I loved that film."
Sniper remembered going to the cimema with his parents... seeing the film for the first time...
Hang on...
Sniper looked at the film year...
1984?
Sniper was born in 1985! How on Earth could he see a film before he was born... as if he had some memories implanted in him... somehow...
Ah well, he would probably never figure it out, so he didn't bother trying.
===|-----------
FM and Pb played paper rock scissors.
Pb won. FM hit him.
Sniper, Grix and Sheepy were playing Poker.
Then... Grix looked up... another Sniper was walking towards them...
He held up a gun.
Grix pulled out a crossbow, and aimed it at the other Sniper...
But he dropped it, and it fell to the ground...
...where it fired, and hit the GOOD Sniper in the head...
...He fell back, and smacked his head on a bottle, which flipped up...
...And smacked Sheepy in the side of the head...
...He fell out cold, and lurched forward, headbutting Grix in the knee...
...Which caused his reflexes to make him kick Sheepy in the face, who fell back...
...Who knocked over Sniper...
...Who fell on the crossbow again...
...And shot the OTHER Sniper in the leg.
"Did you REALLY have to take the mick out of his speaking problem? You KNOW he has trouble with his ff's... DAMN! Now you've got me doing it!"
Sheepy sobbed some more.
--------------
Grix checked what else Venombyte wrote.
---------------
Sniper stepped into the garage... and saw...
"Wow! A Delorean!"
Sniper walked up to the film poster of Back To The Future.
"I loved that film."
Sniper remembered going to the cimema with his parents... seeing the film for the first time...
Hang on...
Sniper looked at the film year...
1984?
Sniper was born in 1985! How on Earth could he see a film before he was born... as if he had some memories implanted in him... somehow...
Ah well, he would probably never figure it out, so he didn't bother trying.
===|-----------
FM and Pb played paper rock scissors.
Pb won. FM hit him.
Sniper, Grix and Sheepy were playing Poker.
Then... Grix looked up... another Sniper was walking towards them...
He held up a gun.
Grix pulled out a crossbow, and aimed it at the other Sniper...
But he dropped it, and it fell to the ground...
...where it fired, and hit the GOOD Sniper in the head...
...He fell back, and smacked his head on a bottle, which flipped up...
...And smacked Sheepy in the side of the head...
...He fell out cold, and lurched forward, headbutting Grix in the knee...
...Which caused his reflexes to make him kick Sheepy in the face, who fell back...
...Who knocked over Sniper...
...Who fell on the crossbow again...
...And shot the OTHER Sniper in the leg.
The Sniper that had just come off the priduction line promptly exploded into loads of moist wet red bits.
The person who had done the exploding waited patiently for a few minutes. Nothing happened.
"Damn! Still haven't got the cloning quite right. He should have come back to life by now." Said the technician type blokey, you know, the ones in the white coats that are always around in films like this.
"I shall go and report to the Master" said an underling, slightly worried.
The underling walked off, out of thge immense stone chamber with all the machinery. It still seemed strange to him, most of the chamber was in darkness. Mass production hadn't started yet. But it would, soon.
He walked over to the corner, where the spiral stair case was. He realised that this maybe the last time he walks these stairs, depending on what mood the Master was in. He began to wonder why he'd volunteered himself, then he realised that he would have been picked anyway.
He noticed every detail on the stair case, the moss growing between the huge stone blocks that made up the wall, the quiet, methodical 'drip, drip' of the water leaking through the bed rock.
As he rose up through the main building, the flooring underfoot became more and more luxurious, until he reached ground level and thick carpets were felt through the holes in the soles of his shoes. He continued up, past huge tapestires that were mounted on the walls, paintings, sculptures and expensoive vases all lined the hallway down which he was walking.
The corridor was wide enough for 20 people to walk abreast, ceiling higher than any other room he had been in. It seemes to be a corridoe that said 'Be very afriad, the person who owns this palace has far more power than you can ever imagine, just bow down before the owner, and your life may be spared.'
He finally reached the door at the end of the hallway, hand shaking he knocked, then slowly turned the handle, and opened the door. The huge oak door swung in smoothly with no sound at his touch. He walked in to see the Master, with his back turned, looking out of the window.
"You have news on the clones?" Said the Master, before introductions were used.
"Y-y-yes Master" said the technician, with a tremor in voice. He rose up from his deep bow.
"Would you care to share that information with me?"
"O-o-of course Master," he had yet to get control over his voice, he only just had enough control to stop his legs buckling., "We have almost perfected the cloning process-"
"Almost?! Almost is no good to me! The team sent to recover the sword have already found there way to the Other World where the Sword is hidden! I need these clones ready as soon as possible! You have failed me!" With that the Master made a slight movement with his hands.
The technician could feel a strange feeling in his body, it ran down his spine, then back up until it reached his brain. Spreading out in waves of pain until he could stand in no more. His legs buckled, he collapsed to the floor, writhing in pain. If felt as though someone was trying to remove his brain, tear his soul from his very body.
He could feel the pressure increase, the pain rise up. Suddenly he could see his body from the outside. He was looking down from above. He no longer had control over his body. The last thing he could see was Safety Concious Neville walk over to his body......
The person who had done the exploding waited patiently for a few minutes. Nothing happened.
"Damn! Still haven't got the cloning quite right. He should have come back to life by now." Said the technician type blokey, you know, the ones in the white coats that are always around in films like this.
"I shall go and report to the Master" said an underling, slightly worried.
The underling walked off, out of thge immense stone chamber with all the machinery. It still seemed strange to him, most of the chamber was in darkness. Mass production hadn't started yet. But it would, soon.
He walked over to the corner, where the spiral stair case was. He realised that this maybe the last time he walks these stairs, depending on what mood the Master was in. He began to wonder why he'd volunteered himself, then he realised that he would have been picked anyway.
He noticed every detail on the stair case, the moss growing between the huge stone blocks that made up the wall, the quiet, methodical 'drip, drip' of the water leaking through the bed rock.
As he rose up through the main building, the flooring underfoot became more and more luxurious, until he reached ground level and thick carpets were felt through the holes in the soles of his shoes. He continued up, past huge tapestires that were mounted on the walls, paintings, sculptures and expensoive vases all lined the hallway down which he was walking.
The corridor was wide enough for 20 people to walk abreast, ceiling higher than any other room he had been in. It seemes to be a corridoe that said 'Be very afriad, the person who owns this palace has far more power than you can ever imagine, just bow down before the owner, and your life may be spared.'
He finally reached the door at the end of the hallway, hand shaking he knocked, then slowly turned the handle, and opened the door. The huge oak door swung in smoothly with no sound at his touch. He walked in to see the Master, with his back turned, looking out of the window.
"You have news on the clones?" Said the Master, before introductions were used.
"Y-y-yes Master" said the technician, with a tremor in voice. He rose up from his deep bow.
"Would you care to share that information with me?"
"O-o-of course Master," he had yet to get control over his voice, he only just had enough control to stop his legs buckling., "We have almost perfected the cloning process-"
"Almost?! Almost is no good to me! The team sent to recover the sword have already found there way to the Other World where the Sword is hidden! I need these clones ready as soon as possible! You have failed me!" With that the Master made a slight movement with his hands.
The technician could feel a strange feeling in his body, it ran down his spine, then back up until it reached his brain. Spreading out in waves of pain until he could stand in no more. His legs buckled, he collapsed to the floor, writhing in pain. If felt as though someone was trying to remove his brain, tear his soul from his very body.
He could feel the pressure increase, the pain rise up. Suddenly he could see his body from the outside. He was looking down from above. He no longer had control over his body. The last thing he could see was Safety Concious Neville walk over to his body......
Dan uk sent a paper aeroplane towards Grix, telling him to look down the page at what he posted on 11/05/2001 at 7.46AM and hoped that Grix would read it.
After that he walked into the cave continuing the subplot...
After that he walked into the cave continuing the subplot...
Sniper stopped the car. He paused, to recollect how he'd escaped from the police, who had chased him when he tried to jump the traffic. Now confident that anyone reading this would look back to read the relevant addition, he could safely continue without fear of anyone getting confused.
He turned off the ignition, and got out of the car, on to the sidewalk. He shut the door, and put the keys in his pocket. He found that last action rather difficult to accompalish, as he realised the keys were still in the ignition. Damn. Better find a new car, or better still, an interesting plotline to follow.
He overheard the cop's radio blurting out as the two traffic cops walked back from the bakery with their doughnuts.
"All units proceed to fairground. Suspected homicide. Two dead already. Attacker is with a group, and appears to carry a plastic sword with a sapphire embedded in it. They should be considered armed and extremely dangerous. Also, note the spelling of the word sapphire. It has P's, not F's. I repeat: P's, not F's."
Sniper ignored the cops as they scrambles into their squad car, and sped twenty yards down the road to the fairground. He'd noticed something strage in the open garage nearby. He went over to take a look inside...
--------------
Meka and co were still in the Taxi. Just like Ant had dreamt they were, earlier. YH tried a headcount. He saw meka, Ant, himself, VenomByte, Dan, and SonicRav. If they'd missed anyone, the next writer could probably make an interesting scene with that. This one however, was quite uninteresting, so the camera switched elswhere.
[yep, this is an extract from the film version. Never quite as good as the story]
---------------
In an unknown place, of an unknown size, an unknown distance away in an unknown location, another Sniper rolled of the end of the procudtion line. That was good, thought the author. Introduce a new location, let someone think of something significant to happen there. Perhaps describe the place a bit better next time though.
He turned off the ignition, and got out of the car, on to the sidewalk. He shut the door, and put the keys in his pocket. He found that last action rather difficult to accompalish, as he realised the keys were still in the ignition. Damn. Better find a new car, or better still, an interesting plotline to follow.
He overheard the cop's radio blurting out as the two traffic cops walked back from the bakery with their doughnuts.
"All units proceed to fairground. Suspected homicide. Two dead already. Attacker is with a group, and appears to carry a plastic sword with a sapphire embedded in it. They should be considered armed and extremely dangerous. Also, note the spelling of the word sapphire. It has P's, not F's. I repeat: P's, not F's."
Sniper ignored the cops as they scrambles into their squad car, and sped twenty yards down the road to the fairground. He'd noticed something strage in the open garage nearby. He went over to take a look inside...
--------------
Meka and co were still in the Taxi. Just like Ant had dreamt they were, earlier. YH tried a headcount. He saw meka, Ant, himself, VenomByte, Dan, and SonicRav. If they'd missed anyone, the next writer could probably make an interesting scene with that. This one however, was quite uninteresting, so the camera switched elswhere.
[yep, this is an extract from the film version. Never quite as good as the story]
---------------
In an unknown place, of an unknown size, an unknown distance away in an unknown location, another Sniper rolled of the end of the procudtion line. That was good, thought the author. Introduce a new location, let someone think of something significant to happen there. Perhaps describe the place a bit better next time though.
The rest of the forum stared at Dan_Uk, wondering what the hell he was on about.
Then, the story continued.
"Gaet ophff meey"
FantasyMeister pulled away the wool from over his eyes...
Grix considered making a joke about FantasyMeister not liking the X-Box, but kept quiet.
"Hail brother FantasyMeister."
FM brushed down his clothes... "Oh God... we're not starting that 'hail' crap again, are we?"
"Er, no."
"Ok. Oh yeah, where did you go?"
"Sniper kidnapped me."
FM stared at Sniper... "Ok."
"No, not that one. I think there are loads of Snipers around. Clones."
"Eh?"
Grix sighed. "Can't you remember the Sniper clones in the first story? I thought it would be amusing to take stuff from previous stories. Might do it a lot from now on."
"I only ever read half of them anyway... so I wouldn't know."
"I found the sword." Pb said.
"That's lovely." Grix turned back to FM. "The problem is though, WHO is cloning Sniper? Who can be sadistic enough to do that?"
Grix turned back to Pb.
"You found the sword?"
"Yup."
"Where?"
"I had to hoop a duck for it."
Grix looked in the direction Pb pointed in... "What...?" Grix walked over...
"How many times did you have to try?" Grix asked Pb, as they walked with him...
"Once. It was the booby prize."
Grix looked at the stall. Swords were hanging from the ceiling, stuck to the wall... a huge box full of them were placed under the table.
Grix looked back at the sword... "Ah! That ones got a shiny thing in it!"
"A saffire."
"Yeah."
"Actually, Sniper turned up in a DeLorean from the skies and gave it to me..."
"Oh."
Sniper held the sword between his hands... he could FEEL the power running through him... the whole world made sense... he could feel the life essense of every creature on the planet... their thoughts... their inner being... he reached his mind across the Earth... feeling the wind and rain across his face... he was... a God...
"Sniper, give me that." Grix snatched the sword away from him. "You shouldn't play with the sword, we don't know what it's for yet."
Sniper reached back at Grix, and tried to get the sword back... when suddenly...
*BOOUFF*
The others turned back to where Sniper stood... or where he did stand...
They looked around. Sniper was in a heap, smacked agaisnt a wall. A man was trying to get to his feet.
"Oh my God! I killed Sniper!" The man in a red helmet and a purple suit said...
"How did you know his name was Sniper?"
"It is!? Wow! What a good guess!"
"Who are you?" Pb asked.
"I'm the human cannonball... I came from the... hey! How did I get out of the tent?"
He looked around. There was a human cannonball shaped whole in the side of a large tent.
"Ah. The cannon must have tilted... fired me straight across the land..."
He looked at the deformed mess of a body.
"...And into poor Sniper here."
"No, it's ok. He dies a lot. He'll come back to life soon."
They watched as Sniper's bones began to reform... his muscles and organs flying back into his body...
Sniper stood up, and wiped a bit of blood from his arm.
"See. I'm so hard. Nothing will stop me."
Then, the story continued.
"Gaet ophff meey"
FantasyMeister pulled away the wool from over his eyes...
Grix considered making a joke about FantasyMeister not liking the X-Box, but kept quiet.
"Hail brother FantasyMeister."
FM brushed down his clothes... "Oh God... we're not starting that 'hail' crap again, are we?"
"Er, no."
"Ok. Oh yeah, where did you go?"
"Sniper kidnapped me."
FM stared at Sniper... "Ok."
"No, not that one. I think there are loads of Snipers around. Clones."
"Eh?"
Grix sighed. "Can't you remember the Sniper clones in the first story? I thought it would be amusing to take stuff from previous stories. Might do it a lot from now on."
"I only ever read half of them anyway... so I wouldn't know."
"I found the sword." Pb said.
"That's lovely." Grix turned back to FM. "The problem is though, WHO is cloning Sniper? Who can be sadistic enough to do that?"
Grix turned back to Pb.
"You found the sword?"
"Yup."
"Where?"
"I had to hoop a duck for it."
Grix looked in the direction Pb pointed in... "What...?" Grix walked over...
"How many times did you have to try?" Grix asked Pb, as they walked with him...
"Once. It was the booby prize."
Grix looked at the stall. Swords were hanging from the ceiling, stuck to the wall... a huge box full of them were placed under the table.
Grix looked back at the sword... "Ah! That ones got a shiny thing in it!"
"A saffire."
"Yeah."
"Actually, Sniper turned up in a DeLorean from the skies and gave it to me..."
"Oh."
Sniper held the sword between his hands... he could FEEL the power running through him... the whole world made sense... he could feel the life essense of every creature on the planet... their thoughts... their inner being... he reached his mind across the Earth... feeling the wind and rain across his face... he was... a God...
"Sniper, give me that." Grix snatched the sword away from him. "You shouldn't play with the sword, we don't know what it's for yet."
Sniper reached back at Grix, and tried to get the sword back... when suddenly...
*BOOUFF*
The others turned back to where Sniper stood... or where he did stand...
They looked around. Sniper was in a heap, smacked agaisnt a wall. A man was trying to get to his feet.
"Oh my God! I killed Sniper!" The man in a red helmet and a purple suit said...
"How did you know his name was Sniper?"
"It is!? Wow! What a good guess!"
"Who are you?" Pb asked.
"I'm the human cannonball... I came from the... hey! How did I get out of the tent?"
He looked around. There was a human cannonball shaped whole in the side of a large tent.
"Ah. The cannon must have tilted... fired me straight across the land..."
He looked at the deformed mess of a body.
"...And into poor Sniper here."
"No, it's ok. He dies a lot. He'll come back to life soon."
They watched as Sniper's bones began to reform... his muscles and organs flying back into his body...
Sniper stood up, and wiped a bit of blood from his arm.
"See. I'm so hard. Nothing will stop me."
HE'd gotten fed up off walking. Dan had needed transport and had quite fortunately found some.
He was on the shoulder of Fogmaster the giant who was walking to where he thought the cloak of Darkness was.
He pointed to a small cave. Dan dismounted and entered the cave. The M16 had been easy to obtain. The cloak wasn't going to be so easy.
He was on the shoulder of Fogmaster the giant who was walking to where he thought the cloak of Darkness was.
He pointed to a small cave. Dan dismounted and entered the cave. The M16 had been easy to obtain. The cloak wasn't going to be so easy.
*FM looks at the 10 pages ahead of him....*
*FM considers his options...."
*FM thinks Grix already knows what the answer is....*
*FM considers his options...."
*FM thinks Grix already knows what the answer is....*
Men dance around a fire, chanting, and worshipping the great SR staff, for ridding the story of the mess.
The story then continues... Grix wonders if FM will find the time to actually read it and contribute normally this time. :0)
The story then continues... Grix wonders if FM will find the time to actually read it and contribute normally this time. :0)
FM would like to add at this very point that in fact, in reality, he would never decapitate or skewer anyone with a sword as he is at heart a very gentle and civilised creature.
Unless they owned a Nintendo of course.
Unless they owned a Nintendo of course.
FM gets up, and sees RBS and Bonus talking about non-story related things, in the story thread. Wasting no time, he rushes up to them.
"Fiends!" he screams, as he Slices the sword of Nogard at RBS's neck, taking his head clean off. Blood pumps from the wound, as the lifeless body falls to the ground.
Bonus watches on, frozen in terror. FM turns on bonus, and runs the sword right through him. He twists it, and watches the expression of a man in the ultimate pain, pondering the short term inevitability of his own death. FM pulls the sword out, and Bonus drops to the ground, dead. FM wipes the sword in the grass, to clean it.
Now THAT was mean ;)
"Fiends!" he screams, as he Slices the sword of Nogard at RBS's neck, taking his head clean off. Blood pumps from the wound, as the lifeless body falls to the ground.
Bonus watches on, frozen in terror. FM turns on bonus, and runs the sword right through him. He twists it, and watches the expression of a man in the ultimate pain, pondering the short term inevitability of his own death. FM pulls the sword out, and Bonus drops to the ground, dead. FM wipes the sword in the grass, to clean it.
Now THAT was mean ;)
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