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It's a goldmine of offensive one liners, and superb dry humour. Let's have your favourite Alan quotes.
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"Did they teach you to repair things in the army?"
"Yeah, that and killing ..... I've seen some terrible things, mind"
"What? Like three men burning in a tank going WWWUUUUURRRRRR ... ?"
"Yeah, that and killing ..... I've seen some terrible things, mind"
"What? Like three men burning in a tank going WWWUUUUURRRRRR ... ?"
"I've been pubic for 31 years!"
Had to get that one in. And:
"I've got a scam with a big plate"
Had to get that one in. And:
"I've got a scam with a big plate"
Mr Snuggly wrote:
>I'm becoming Alan!
Jurrassic Park!
>I'm becoming Alan!
Jurrassic Park!
Whitestripes DX wrote:
> "Would it be terribly rude for me to stop listening to you and
> go and speak to someone else"?
Heh, I actually said that in all seriousness to someone yesterday and afterwards realised how bad it must have sounded. I'm becoming Alan!
"I'm Batman!"
> "Would it be terribly rude for me to stop listening to you and
> go and speak to someone else"?
Heh, I actually said that in all seriousness to someone yesterday and afterwards realised how bad it must have sounded. I'm becoming Alan!
"I'm Batman!"
"The interesting thing about news and current affairs.."
"Would it be terribly rude for me to stop listening to you and go and speak to someone else"?
"Would it be terribly rude for me to stop listening to you and go and speak to someone else"?
"What do you think about the pedestrianisation of Norwich high street? To be honest, I'm dead against it. People forget.. that.. traders need acCESS TO DIIXXOONNNSS... but I do suppose it'll be handy for people in whHEEELLCHHAAIIRS..."
(while receiving head in his hotel room)
Never has one line made me laugh so much so that my guts done hurted. I'm off to watch it now, actually.
(while receiving head in his hotel room)
Never has one line made me laugh so much so that my guts done hurted. I'm off to watch it now, actually.
Don't be Blue, Peter.
"Live TV can blow up in your face. [pause] Sorry, didn't mean to talk about that."
"What?"
"You know, bombs, bombing..."
"Oh, we're from Dublin."
"Yeah, but that's where you make them."
"What?"
"You know, bombs, bombing..."
"Oh, we're from Dublin."
"Yeah, but that's where you make them."
"I think we are starting to move away from the old stereotypical associations with ireland - guiness, horses running through council estates, badly paved driveways in this country, toothless simpletons, people in platformed shoes being arrested for bombings, people with eyebrows on their cheeks ... and beamish. Yes I guess what we're trying to say is der's more to oiland dan dis ..."
"Fire fire, the fayre's on fire!"
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