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Hi guys again, I am quite nervous of posting this on here but I thought you needed something a little light hearted and different to the usual short stories!
This is what I dream of doing one day writing stories for little kids in poetry form.. so please read and open the inner kid inside.. and constructive critism please?? ok! Love ginge x
Quiet Little Boy.
In a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quite little boy
Who is fascinated by space
On a clear quiet night
He would lay on the grass
Gazing ahead and counting the stars
With a pair of binoculars
For as far as he could see
He’d calculate and navigate
The whole galaxy
From the edge, to the edge, of the edge
Of the night
He’d uncover and discover
With such delight
That when he shut his eyes
He would dream
Of riding shooting stars
Bright orange and green
He’d bounce and pounce on the
Side of the moon
And watch the fiery glow
Of planet Neptune
He could play with Martians
On a planet called Mars
And teach them football and baseball
And how to play cards
And teach them of earth
And its oceans and mountains
And all of the good things
Like sweeties and family outings
He could sail on a boat
On the Milky Way
While eating cookies
And drinking lemonade
Watching comets and meteorites
As big as the lands
He could smile and wave
At passing spaceman
Then drift back to the night
And lay on the grass
Just gazing ahead
And counting the stars
For in a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quiet little boy
Who is fascinated by space!
This is what I dream of doing one day writing stories for little kids in poetry form.. so please read and open the inner kid inside.. and constructive critism please?? ok! Love ginge x
Quiet Little Boy.
In a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quite little boy
Who is fascinated by space
On a clear quiet night
He would lay on the grass
Gazing ahead and counting the stars
With a pair of binoculars
For as far as he could see
He’d calculate and navigate
The whole galaxy
From the edge, to the edge, of the edge
Of the night
He’d uncover and discover
With such delight
That when he shut his eyes
He would dream
Of riding shooting stars
Bright orange and green
He’d bounce and pounce on the
Side of the moon
And watch the fiery glow
Of planet Neptune
He could play with Martians
On a planet called Mars
And teach them football and baseball
And how to play cards
And teach them of earth
And its oceans and mountains
And all of the good things
Like sweeties and family outings
He could sail on a boat
On the Milky Way
While eating cookies
And drinking lemonade
Watching comets and meteorites
As big as the lands
He could smile and wave
At passing spaceman
Then drift back to the night
And lay on the grass
Just gazing ahead
And counting the stars
For in a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quiet little boy
Who is fascinated by space!
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Ah, that was as a means to defend themselves from aggression, not as an expression of anger! ;-)
One aim of enlightenment is to drop the ego, in that your actions work for the best of everyone, rather than on the whim of your personal feelings.
I can see why Paradox didn't like this and saw the praise as infatuated brown nosing but I disagree.
I mean, the "dark" writing is great the first few times, but I've seen it so much now that it's filled with clichés.
This one has plenty clichés, but I've not seen them in 10 years or so and it's not aimed at me anysway. :-)
And it's not so darn miserable as everyone else seems to be nowdays. :-)
One aim of enlightenment is to drop the ego, in that your actions work for the best of everyone, rather than on the whim of your personal feelings.
I can see why Paradox didn't like this and saw the praise as infatuated brown nosing but I disagree.
I mean, the "dark" writing is great the first few times, but I've seen it so much now that it's filled with clichés.
This one has plenty clichés, but I've not seen them in 10 years or so and it's not aimed at me anysway. :-)
And it's not so darn miserable as everyone else seems to be nowdays. :-)
Strafio wrote:
> Flockhart wrote:
> Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well
> practiced in it.
>
> Tsk. Not the right attitude for someone who wants to go Buddhist! ;-)
You are correct but i'm not a buddhist yet, and i've seen them fight as well, something about protecting a temple.
> Flockhart wrote:
> Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well
> practiced in it.
>
> Tsk. Not the right attitude for someone who wants to go Buddhist! ;-)
You are correct but i'm not a buddhist yet, and i've seen them fight as well, something about protecting a temple.
Flockhart wrote:
> Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well
> practiced in it.
Tsk. Not the right attitude for someone who wants to go Buddhist! ;-)
> Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well
> practiced in it.
Tsk. Not the right attitude for someone who wants to go Buddhist! ;-)
Paradox: wrote:
> Do you want me to stab you in the neck you little mammas boy? Lil
> Ginge, A woman? I best brown nose her to the best of my ability
> because she might just sleep with me. Don't waste me time with your
> ladyboy comments, you clown.
Take a look at everyone else's comment and then ask who the clown is.
Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well practiced in it.
> Do you want me to stab you in the neck you little mammas boy? Lil
> Ginge, A woman? I best brown nose her to the best of my ability
> because she might just sleep with me. Don't waste me time with your
> ladyboy comments, you clown.
Take a look at everyone else's comment and then ask who the clown is.
Violence is not my way, but i'm willing to play that game i'm well practiced in it.
Black Glove wrote:
> *opens inner kid*
>
> I imagine each verse accompanied with a dreamy little drawing.
Thats what I can imagine, its what I am aiming for - like a crapper shirley hughes! (if anyone loved her like i did)
She had wicked pics with a few lines on each page!
Anyway I must go and plan my life in my room night all and thank you! x
> *opens inner kid*
>
> I imagine each verse accompanied with a dreamy little drawing.
Thats what I can imagine, its what I am aiming for - like a crapper shirley hughes! (if anyone loved her like i did)
She had wicked pics with a few lines on each page!
Anyway I must go and plan my life in my room night all and thank you! x
Paradox, are you sleeping with Cub!st?
*opens inner kid*
I imagine each verse accompanied with a dreamy little drawing.
Nice work, Ginge. I think you've captured what you aimed to capture. It has a simple clarity and a smiley flight-of-fanciness.
I imagine each verse accompanied with a dreamy little drawing.
Nice work, Ginge. I think you've captured what you aimed to capture. It has a simple clarity and a smiley flight-of-fanciness.
No its ok,
Its a shame paradox doesnt like this sort of thing but he isnt very 'kiddy loving'... o well he likes my short stories and stuff!
Not everybodies things but wont stop sorry Kyle, its what I love. Its different to what we all do! Its not DEPRESSING!
Its a shame paradox doesnt like this sort of thing but he isnt very 'kiddy loving'... o well he likes my short stories and stuff!
Not everybodies things but wont stop sorry Kyle, its what I love. Its different to what we all do! Its not DEPRESSING!
Flockhart wrote:
> Keep it constructive or b*gger kids
Bugg*r kids? You have those two words in the same sentence? You sicko. Your kind make me sick you nonce.
> Keep it constructive or b*gger kids
Bugg*r kids? You have those two words in the same sentence? You sicko. Your kind make me sick you nonce.
Do you want me to stab you in the neck you little mammas boy? Lil Ginge, A woman? I best brown nose her to the best of my ability because she might just sleep with me. Don't waste me time with your ladyboy comments, you clown.
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