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This is what I dream of doing one day writing stories for little kids in poetry form.. so please read and open the inner kid inside.. and constructive critism please?? ok! Love ginge x
Quiet Little Boy.
In a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quite little boy
Who is fascinated by space
On a clear quiet night
He would lay on the grass
Gazing ahead and counting the stars
With a pair of binoculars
For as far as he could see
He’d calculate and navigate
The whole galaxy
From the edge, to the edge, of the edge
Of the night
He’d uncover and discover
With such delight
That when he shut his eyes
He would dream
Of riding shooting stars
Bright orange and green
He’d bounce and pounce on the
Side of the moon
And watch the fiery glow
Of planet Neptune
He could play with Martians
On a planet called Mars
And teach them football and baseball
And how to play cards
And teach them of earth
And its oceans and mountains
And all of the good things
Like sweeties and family outings
He could sail on a boat
On the Milky Way
While eating cookies
And drinking lemonade
Watching comets and meteorites
As big as the lands
He could smile and wave
At passing spaceman
Then drift back to the night
And lay on the grass
Just gazing ahead
And counting the stars
For in a quiet little village
In a quiet little place
Lives a quiet little boy
Who is fascinated by space!
> pb wrote:
> Nice poem, get the scan right and it will be perfect for kids.
>
> The scan???
>
> that probably made me sound stupid but could you explan please :) O
> and thankyou :)
basically how evenly it is laid out, consistant rhythmn so the lines, or at least rhyming ones, have the same amount of sylables in. This is assuming it is poetry - as it makes it easy to read. If its a rhyming story it's not that important.
what is it?
> Nice poem, get the scan right and it will be perfect for kids.
The scan???
that probably made me sound stupid but could you explan please :) O and thankyou :)
:D
i am ginge
The one with zero gameadays?? NO LONGER!
*opens champagne*
IMHO
Look at all the cool storys and poems winning instead of Reviews nowadays.
*Smug*
Was funny :D