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"It's hotter than the sun"
"He drew a chalk pen1s on the back of my blazer and I got caned for it"
"Back of the net"
[pointing at Lynn's hair] "Is that your mother's money coming through? That's all part of the bereavement dividend. She was quite a heiferlump though, I'd say she was big-hearted but that would be bull****"
"Guess which one of you ladies I'm going to make love to now"
"British roads are among the safest in Europe. But this isn't Britain, [puts on German voice] dis is der Autobahn"
"Get you on the old jeans rule? Nazis! Only with excellent facilities. As had the Nazis"
"This is a petrol station, not the Gulf War. Which is ironically a giant petrol station."
"I use Lynx Africa"
"F***y hair!"
If you don't know what I'm talking about, you missed the funniest TV show ever last night, in I'm Alan Partridge. Make sure you catch it next week.
"This Apple Turnover contains a filling that's about 1000 degrees centigrade. If I squeeze it, a jet of molten hot Bramley apple will squirt out, it could go your way, it could go mine. Either way, one of us is going down."
Brilliant.
"He drew a chalk pen1s on the back of my blazer and I got caned for it"
"Back of the net"
[pointing at Lynn's hair] "Is that your mother's money coming through? That's all part of the bereavement dividend. She was quite a heiferlump though, I'd say she was big-hearted but that would be bull****"
"Guess which one of you ladies I'm going to make love to now"
"British roads are among the safest in Europe. But this isn't Britain, [puts on German voice] dis is der Autobahn"
"Get you on the old jeans rule? Nazis! Only with excellent facilities. As had the Nazis"
"This is a petrol station, not the Gulf War. Which is ironically a giant petrol station."
"I use Lynx Africa"
"F***y hair!"
If you don't know what I'm talking about, you missed the funniest TV show ever last night, in I'm Alan Partridge. Make sure you catch it next week.
"This Apple Turnover contains a filling that's about 1000 degrees centigrade. If I squeeze it, a jet of molten hot Bramley apple will squirt out, it could go your way, it could go mine. Either way, one of us is going down."
Brilliant.
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let's just say... it was no lord of the rings: the two towers
Vice wrote:
> in my opinion the latest series of alan partridge wasn't that good, i
> only saw 4 of the episodes because i grew bored towards the end. The
> first series was incredibly funny likewise and i would do anything to
> get my hands on a copy of the DVD. sadly i won't be wanting the dvd or
> vhs of the latest series in fact i thought knowing me knowing you was
> a lot better too.
Well you're just sa-a-aaaad.
> in my opinion the latest series of alan partridge wasn't that good, i
> only saw 4 of the episodes because i grew bored towards the end. The
> first series was incredibly funny likewise and i would do anything to
> get my hands on a copy of the DVD. sadly i won't be wanting the dvd or
> vhs of the latest series in fact i thought knowing me knowing you was
> a lot better too.
Well you're just sa-a-aaaad.
When he put one of his little clips on as an introduction to a talk about rage or something, that was hilarious. Full of expletives that were censored:
"Fat a*se m***erf***er! C**t!"
"Ah, I'm turning it off, it's just annoying".
"I'm a big fan of your radio show. I've read your book"
"Really? What did you think of it?"
"Didn't really work for me"
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about that earlier, caught me at a bad time"
"No problem....so...I hear your book's being pulped."
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about the earlier incidents, when you get a lot of criticism sometimes it's hard to take it"
"That's okay"
"So what didn't you like about the book then?"
"I don't think anecdotes are your forté"
"Really? Well here's an anecdote....*already been quoted* NEEDLESS TO SAY, I HAD THE LAST LAUGH. Now f*ck off."
"Fat a*se m***erf***er! C**t!"
"Ah, I'm turning it off, it's just annoying".
"I'm a big fan of your radio show. I've read your book"
"Really? What did you think of it?"
"Didn't really work for me"
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about that earlier, caught me at a bad time"
"No problem....so...I hear your book's being pulped."
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about the earlier incidents, when you get a lot of criticism sometimes it's hard to take it"
"That's okay"
"So what didn't you like about the book then?"
"I don't think anecdotes are your forté"
"Really? Well here's an anecdote
When he put one of his little clips on as an introduction to a talk about rage or something, that was hilarious. Full of expletives that were censored:
"Fat a*se m***erf***er! C**t!"
"Ah, I'm turning it off, it's just annoying".
"I'm a big fan of your radio show. I've read your book"
"Really? What did you think of it?"
"Didn't really work for me"
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about that earlier, caught me at a bad time"
"No problem....so...I hear your book's being pulped."
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about the earlier incidents, when you get a lot of criticism sometimes it's hard to take it"
"That's okay"
"So what didn't you like about the book then?"
"I don't think anecdotes are your forté"
"Really? Well here's an anecdote....*already been quoted* NEEDLESS TO SAY, I HAD THE LAST LAUGH. Now f*ck off."
"Fat a*se m***erf***er! C**t!"
"Ah, I'm turning it off, it's just annoying".
"I'm a big fan of your radio show. I've read your book"
"Really? What did you think of it?"
"Didn't really work for me"
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about that earlier, caught me at a bad time"
"No problem....so...I hear your book's being pulped."
"F*F**K OFF!"
"Sorry about the earlier incidents, when you get a lot of criticism sometimes it's hard to take it"
"That's okay"
"So what didn't you like about the book then?"
"I don't think anecdotes are your forté"
"Really? Well here's an anecdote
*uses his own, Geordie, accent*
"Oawh, I can still smell ya, like, cos I haven't had a shower"
Classic
"Don't be blue, Peter!"
Needless to say, he had the last laugh
"Oawh, I can still smell ya, like, cos I haven't had a shower"
Classic
"Don't be blue, Peter!"
Needless to say, he had the last laugh
Mr Snuggly wrote:
> "What is Cockney?"
> "Cockney is a small village in London, where criminals live.
> Their vicious thugs, but the police can't touch them because they only
> slaughter their own."
I think his ranting about East End gangsters was the highlight last night, put your head in a candy floss machine / handcuff you to a clamped car, and shove a mobile phone up your...
> "What is Cockney?"
> "Cockney is a small village in London, where criminals live.
> Their vicious thugs, but the police can't touch them because they only
> slaughter their own."
I think his ranting about East End gangsters was the highlight last night, put your head in a candy floss machine / handcuff you to a clamped car, and shove a mobile phone up your...
Alan - "Are you hairy Mary?"
Woman on phone -"No!"
Alan - "What?"
Woman on phone - "NO!"
Woman on phone -"No!"
Alan - "What?"
Woman on phone - "NO!"
Fantastic episode.
"I know you've had problems in the past"
*Pretends to inject
"You could say, needles to say... I... took.... drugs"
"I presume we're all going to stay in touch"
*No response
The whole radio show was hilarious and the ending...
"FCUK OFF"
"I know you've had problems in the past"
*Pretends to inject
"You could say, needles to say... I... took.... drugs"
"I presume we're all going to stay in touch"
*No response
The whole radio show was hilarious and the ending...
"FCUK OFF"
Brilliant last night.
"Just doing some Hygenic Snogging"
"Just doing some Hygenic Snogging"
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