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"The Office Series 1 quotes."

Watched through the whole of the first series over the weekend. Hadn't seen many of the episodes first time around, so some of the quotes were hilarious. Here are a couple of my favourites:

"So, Gareth, what's your fantasy?"

"Two lesbians. Sisters probably. I'm just watching..."

- - - - - -

"What are you thinking right now, then?"

"I was wondering, if a boy would ever be born who could swim faster than a shark."

- - - - - - - -

"Why should women with big breasts be expolited?"

"They should be rewarded, if anything."

- - - - - - -

"I just stayed in and had a biiiiiig w**k."

Watched through the whole of the first series over the weekend. Hadn't seen many of the episodes first time around, so some of the quotes were hilarious. Here are a couple of my favourites:

"So, Gareth, what's your fantasy?"

"Two lesbians. Sisters probably. I'm just watching..."

- - - - - -

"What are you thinking right now, then?"

"I was wondering, if a boy would ever be born who could swim faster than a shark."

- - - - - - - -

"Why should women with big breasts be expolited?"

"They should be rewarded, if anything."

- - - - - - -

"I just stayed in and had a biiiiiig w**k."

"What are you gonna do, phone me?"

"One up the bum, no harm done"

"Depressing, isn't it?"
"What?"
"Staying in all your life, watching Peak Practice."
"Yeah"
"Not for me, I like it."

"So who would you rather be stuck with for getting twigs and berries?"
"...Daley Thompson"

"So the only reason you've been talking to me is for a shag?"
"Yeah, and from behind cos your breath stinks of onions and I didnt tell you that either did I?"

"Don't worry, Monkey Alan fancies you even if no-one else does"

"But at least they're able-minded. Well, it's hard to tell with the wheelchair ones isn't it?"

Can't remember exact conversation... but the stapler in the jelly was the the best part of the whole series.

"What the hell is that?"

"Alright, Gareth, what is it?"

"Look, he's put my stapler in a jelly again. This is the third time he's done it, and it wasn't even funny the first time."

Undoubtedly the BEST part of the entire series

"I'll go and get the guitar then"

No, no, no best part of the series was definently where Gareth had to find out who put porn on the office computers and he had his own little room which he put signs on outside.

"Investigation room"

"Keenan Invetigates (crossed out) Investigates"

And the whole wind up on Gareth by Tim and the reception girl.

"So he's descovered your CAMP, and he's trying to enter your hole would you happilly take him from behind?"

"Yes, if need be"

(There more or less the quotes anyway)

:)

Everyone knows it but it still makes me almost pish myself with laughter everytime I see it...

"There's good news and there's bad news... The bad news is that the Swindon branch WILL be closing so there's going to be some redundancies... Yeah... Really sorry. The good news is... I've been promoted! So.. silver lining to every cloud..."

"I will not have her tunnel banded around this office willy-nilly"

By the way, you messed that quote up a bit Skanky. Just thought I'd point it out :)