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"Do u have any jokes!!!!!! I HAVE!!!!!"

There was a cat and a c**krel. They walk onto a bridge and the cat falls in. The c**krel bursts out laughing. Whats the morale of this story?



Answer: Wherever there is a wet pu*sy there is always a happy c**k!!!!!!!!

Why did the blonde put a condom on her head.




She thought she'd catch hearing AIDS.


What d'you call a blonde with a brain.



A Golden Retriever.

Jez13 wrote:
> Ha ha ha ha ha.... not funny. The jokes not funny, and who the hell
> watches "wipout with bob monkhouse"!

I'll have you know that Wipeout is a staplepart of my tv viewing along with The Enemy Within, Neighbours and Family Fortunes.

Lighten up you grumpy get.

Two brunettes and a blonde marooned on an island. It's 100 miles to the next island. They all decide that they have to make a swim for it. The first brunette swims 13 miles and drowns. The 2nd brunette swims 25 mile, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims 91 miles, gets tired, so she swims back.

Rainier Wolfcastle wrote:
> Mr.b-k wrote:
> What did an inflatable headteacher say to a pupil that was wielding
> a
> pin?
>
> >ANSWER<: "You've let the school down, you've let your
> friends down and you've even let me down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
>
> You've nicked this gag off Bob Monkhouse on wipeout haven't you?
>
> Tsk Tsk tsk

Ha ha ha ha ha.... not funny. The jokes not funny, and who the hell watches "wipout with bob monkhouse"!

Mr.b-k wrote:
> What did an inflatable headteacher say to a pupil that was wielding a
> pin?
>
> >ANSWER<: "You've let the school down, you've let your
> friends down and you've even let me down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

You've nicked this gag off Bob Monkhouse on wipeout haven't you?

Tsk Tsk tsk

What did an inflatable headteacher say to a pupil that was wielding a pin?

>ANSWER<: "You've let the school down, you've let your friends down and you've even let me down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Protoss wrote:
> Englishman, Scotsman, Irishman all caught by the Germans and sent to a
> POW camp during World War II. Later they all make a daring escape. The
> Englishman hides in a cage of dogs, the Scotsman hides in a cage of
> cats and the Irishman hides in a bag of potatoes. The German sentries
> come looking for them with attack dogs. When they come near him the
> Englishman says ''woof, woof'', the Scotsman says ''meow, meow''. The
> Irishman says ''potatoe, potatoe.''

Blue-Fuzzy-Tiger wrote:
Potatoe.

There was a man who was obsessed with the colour red.
The red man was having a wash in his red bath with his red rubber duckie.
There is a knock on the door. The red man gets his red towel goes down his red stairs and answers his red door.
It is the postwoman. The red man is amazed by the postwoman's beauty that he drops his red towel, leaving himself in his red naked glory. The postwoman screamed, ran across the road and killed herself

Moral: Never cross the road when the red man flashes.

For you suckers who don't understand it, the I'm comparing the red man to the red man on the traffic lights that tell you when to not walk.
When I told this joke to my friend, he didn't understand it. Maybe he's stupid??? That's probably why he's my friend.

Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants?


Answer: incase you get a hole in one.

Englishman, Scotsman, Irishman all caught by the Germans and sent to a POW camp during World War II. Later they all make a daring escape. The Englishman hides in a cage of dogs, the Scotsman hides in a cage of cats and the Irishman hides in a bag of potatoes. The German sentries come looking for them with attack dogs. When they come near him the Englishman says ''woof, woof'', the Scotsman says ''meow, meow''. The Irishman says ''potatoe, potatoe.''