Viewing Thread:
"Daer Meka..."

Hello, and welcome to my brand new problem page. If you have a problem regarding gaming, or any aspecct of your life, then please feel free to post here, and I'll try to see if I can come to some kind of a solution for you.

Here's a couple of the letters I've already recieved:

Dear Meka,

Please can you help me, I'm having an awful time at the moment. I imported a Gamecube from Japan, and I managed to get the box open without any help, but from there I am stuck.

There are loads of leads, but I can't get them all in the television.

Can you please help me?

Nintendo fan, 26, Stoke.

Certainly Nintendo fan. First of all start off my removing your mittens. Now take the instruction manual to a proper adult and ask them if they can help you. Don't ask other Ninties, as you'll have the same problems there.

Hope this helps, Meka.


Dear Meka,

I wiz wundrin wot gamez I should get wen da Gamecube comes out! I don' really like da kiddy games cos I int a kiddy no more. Don' tell me 2 get a Gaystation or a sex-Box cos they is suckers consoles!!!

Limp Bizkit fan, 14, Da Hood.

I'm sorry LB fan, but you're beyond help.

thanks a lot....

I didnt lie, i just ommited certain truths

Bonus wrote:
> Daer Meka,

I have recently stumbled (excellent choice of word, mental note
> Snuggly ;)) over a new condition apparently ravaging the English countryside.
> Despite the agricultural difficulties seen by Foot and Mouth, this disease
> targets the heads of men, English men to be precise. It is believed that this
> cerebral fungus develops in the male Enlgish brain, because most of it is
> disfunctional and useless.

P.S. No Englishmen were harmed in research of this
> disease.

I'm glad no one was harmed.

What are the symptoms, txt tlk an' gangsta slang?

Meka

HelloHowAreYou wrote:
> Dear Meka the main door of my school is locked.. how do i get out???

Wait for the zoo keeper to unlock it, then swiftly eat as much fish as you can.

Meka

Daer Meka,

I have recently stumbled (excellent choice of word, mental note Snuggly ;)) over a new condition apparently ravaging the English countryside. Despite the agricultural difficulties seen by Foot and Mouth, this disease targets the heads of men, English men to be precise. It is believed that this cerebral fungus develops in the male Enlgish brain, because most of it is disfunctional and useless.

P.S. No Englishmen were harmed in research of this disease.

Dear Meka the main door of my school is locked.. how do i get out???

I seem to remember there was a complaint about the Werthers originals ad.. something about it being very misleading - and it being highly unlikely your grandad would've been given them as they are a German made sweet that hasn't been in this country that long.

Goatboy wrote:
> Dear Mucky,

The princesses like to stroke my sideburns in the morning.
My
> sideburns are a very nice shape.

Do you think my leather jacket makes me look
> like a badass?

thank you

A.P

Very badass.

But you really should let your eyebrows grow back.

misterhappy wrote:
> Dear Meka,
"Hi, my name's Tyrone C. Love, I'm worried that I was only ever
> a bit part in a story and that my character was never properly developed. I
> sometimes feel like a mere plot device used to draw information out of the
> central character. And I am stuck with a ridiculous pimp's name. Can you help me
> change it? Can you help me take on a more substantial role? I feel so..
> inadequate." said Tyrone to Harry, who responded at length...

I too feel that your character could have been developed further.

Change your name. You don't have to get it done officially, just start calling yourself something else.

Meka

misterhappy wrote:
> Dear Meka,
You gotta help me... I am a spoilt rich girl who fell in love with
> someone from coney island but I'm afraid my parents wouldn't approve. He's very
> nice and charming but I think he's bothered by the fact that I sleep with this
> man named Arnold every month to make sure my parents keep sending me my
> allowance. Oh and I think I'm becoming addicted to drugs, which is why I need my
> allowance and will never be able to fulfil my dream of opening a sucessful art
> gallery and café in Europe. Basically the problem is:
-my relationship's
> messed up
-I really need another hit
-This scary guy says he'll give me some
> stuff if I go to one of his parties

Do I go?

Yours,
Marion

Marion, don't go to the party.

Please.

Meka

Mystique wrote:
> Dear Meka,

I am finding it hard to cope being so sexy, everywhere i go people
> stop me and say "god you're sexy".
I am becomming sexier and sexier
> everyday and i dont think i could cope with the crowds of people chasing me
> wanting just to be in my presence.

What do i do?

Mystique

P.s Is my
> monkey gay?

Seek the Asian Prince. You are sexy, and you shall be his princess.

Your monkey does not appear to be gay, but could be fighting it.

Meka