Viewing Thread:
"Townie Jokes"

What d'ya call a townie in a blender?

Mush.



What d'ya call a townie in a fridge?

Chillin.



What d'ya call a townie in a filing cabinet?

Sorted.



What d'ya call a townie in a blender in a box?

Innit mush.



What d'ya call a townie in a jar?

Sweet!



What d'ya call a townie over 13?

Pregnant.



What d'ya call a townie in a car?

Busted.



What d'ya call a townie on a bike?

A thief.



What do you call a townie with his legs stuck down a drain?

Gutted mush.



What d'ya say to a townie with a job?

Big Mac and fries.



What did the little townie say to the big townie?

Can you get served?



What do you say to a townie in a suit?

Will the defendant please stand.



What d'ya call a 30 year old townie?

Dunno, ask his 17 year old son.



How can you tell a female townie virgin?

She can run faster than her brothers.



What do you call a townie in a skatepark?

Lost.



Why did the townie cross the road?

To punch someone for absolutely no reason whatsoever.



What's a townies favourite car?

One without an alarm.



What do townies use as protection during sex?

A bus shelter.



What's the difference between a dying townie and an onion?

Onions make you cry.



How does a townie girl turn the lights off after sex?

She closes the car door.



How many townies does it take to change a light bulb?

5. 1 to put it in, the other 4 to tell him "innit, innit, innit, innit".



What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead townie in the road?

The cat has skid marks in front of it.

Kyz22 wrote:
> There are so many names for the buggers.
>
> Townies in Yorkshire/Lancashire
>
> Radgies in Newcastle
>
> Neds in Scotland
>
> Charves further down south
>
> Gangstaaaaaaaz in London
>
> etc etc

Gs/Gboys/Garys/GQueens/Trainee around here

What do you call a townies dad?
The milkman

They're known as charves/charvers here too, but the term radgie comes from the older expression "radgie charver". We just shortened that.

(radge means angry)

Azul wrote:
> Shadow Knight wrote:
> or a tent in glastenbery
>
> But that's a normal thing to do....

i never mensioned townies :P

Shadow Knight wrote:
> or a tent in glastenbery

But that's a normal thing to do....

or a tent in glastenbery

Shadow Knight wrote:
> hang around street corners smoking crack
> or joyriding cars.

Or have sex in tents in Dulwich Park...

don't bring rock music into it i like bands like limp bizket, nickleback etc... but i don't hang around street corners smoking crack or joyriding cars.

Gangstars are not the same as townies.
In london, Townies are called Bazzas (shazza is the female version), although there aren't many in London. There are more rudes, who will just jack your phone, if you are stupid enough to have one.

Townies listen to Drum and Bass type music.

I listen to that music.

Yeah, townies are cool you all suck. ;-)

Oh, and I don't think townies listen to Lenny Kravitz; or any rock for that matter.
They're just crap jokes, that's all