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"FoG Story. Only contribute if, A) You're good at writing, B) YOU STICK TO THE PLOT!!"

FM licked the first three fingers of his right hand and stroked his eyebrows, smoothing them down. He turned at, white robes with simple gold embroidery down the front swishing around him as he heard the guard approach.

FM was standing in a simple square room, with four braziers, one in each corner, all burning different colours. These weren’t normal flames however, as they did not give off coloured light, and the room remained smokeless, with a white light seeming to emanate from the walls and floor, with no shadows forming. In the middle of the room were two pedestals, about four feet apart. On top of them was a box. In it was FM’s father. FM turned as the guard stopped, bowing.

“Master.” Said Sniper, raising his head, looking into FM’s cold, hard eyes.
“You have your mission? You are ready to leave?”
“Yes Master.”
“Good.” FM turned back to look at the coffin, licking his fingers and rubbings his eyebrows again as he spoke. “This is just the first part my friend. I will have my revenge, I do not know when, but I will/”
“Yes Master.” There was an edge of concern in Snipers voice.
“What is wrong, my friend?”
“I do not know, Master. I think I am worrying with no reason.”
“Ah. You are concerned about the book, yes?” Sniper lowered his eyes. “Do not fear. I will find the book. MY magic grows with each passing month, soon I will have the power needed to find the book. Then, when it is mine, I will have unimaginable power!” FM felt a shiver run up his spine as he closed his eyes, imagining the power he would wield. He looked at Sniper. “You have your orders.”
“Yes Master Meister.”
“Go. Be swift, and do not fail me.” Sniper turned and left the room.

FM turned back to the coffin. As he walked around it, his fingers traced the inscription carved into the stone. He knew them all, word for word, but their feel comforted him. They were instructions on how to travel the underworld.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Wrath exploded through Meka’s mind. He screamed “No!” in a murderous rage as he leapt off the rock. With both hands he brought the sword up while still in mid-air. When he hit the ground he recoiled, swinging it around from behind in an arc. The sword whistled with its speed. The man had turned as Meka hit the ground. Seeing Meka coming, he brought his own sword up defensively, with lightning speed.

Meka watched as if in a dream as his sword come around. Every ounce of his strength went into trying to make the sword go truer, go faster. Be deadlier. The magic raged with his need. Meka looked from the mans sword, hard into the steel blue eyes. Mekas sword followed the track of his eyes, he heard himself still screaming. The man held his sword straight up, to deflect the blow.

Everything else around the man dissolved in Mekas vision. His anger, the magic, was unleashed like never before. No power on earth could deny him the mans blood.

He finished his arc, the sword coming round at eye height to the side of the mans head. It shattered through the mans sword, and exploded through his chainmail hood, bits of molten twisted metal flying off into the undergrowth. The sword continued its journey, making contact with the mans skull, and continuing through, out the other side of his head.

Bits of bone blood and brain flew up into the air as the early morning air was filled with a cloud of red mist. Steaks of blood covered Meka, dripped down his body, dribbled off his sword as he slowly lowered the point to the ground.

The mans body crumpled slowly to the ground, blood pumping out over the ground, mixing with the puddles already there. Meka could feel the cold mist help cool his body.

“Meka!” Meka awoke, a sheen of sweat over his whole body. “Meka, my brother, are you alright?” asked Grix.
“It was that dream.”
“Again?” Meka nodded in reply.
“Come on, get up, we have to meet the others soon.”
“Who?”
“You know, the others from the village. Dan2K1, Venombyte and Ant.”
“What about er-no, and YH?”
“They said they had something to do. They will meet us later.” Grix helped his brother to sit up.
“Ok, give me a few minutes." Grix nodded and left the room. Meka put his head in his hands as he thought about the dream.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Master Meister?” FM looked around.
“Yes?”
“I have some bad news Lord, about Sniper.”
“He hasn’t dies again has he?”
“Yes Lord, he fell off his horse.”
“How did that kill him?”
“Into the moat.”
“He can swim.”
“Yes Lord, but as he tried to climb out, he must have pulled the lever, the one you ordered put in?”
“I vaguely remember.”
“That let the piranhas in.”
“Ah. I should have expected something like this. He has a whole bloody palace to have his accidents in. I put all that sponge about so he wouldn’t hurt himself, and yet he falls into the piranha moat. Amazing. Nevermind, he will be back by now. Tell him to continue with his task. Tell him to be more careful next time.”

Somewhere in the clouds, two people with halo's were playing Goldeneye.

Meka was Bond, Strafex was Alec. The complex was where the moonraker laser shoot out was taking place.

Alec appeared in the tower window, bond shot then missed. Alec fired back but only hitting the arm. Bond lined up the crosshair to Alecs head...

The TV went off.

"OI!" Meka started banging it to be stopped by an Angel behind him.

"Er-no has nearly fulfilled the task. You must pack your belongings and prepare to go back to the mortal world."

"Awww, can't I just stay and hour longer..."

"NO. And if you commit suicide then you're not going to be allowed the play on a computer again for 1000 years. Understand?"

Meka nodded glumly and walked away.

"Bah! Who am I going to play now? I finished the single player game ages ago!"

"Come with me then, God has an assignment for you."

"No it's alright, I'll make do by myself..."

Strafex got dragged away by the angel.

He sighed. You couldn't dead people just rest in peace...

Seattle, Washington. The sun beat down on the sidewalks, people dived into the deli's to grab on the pretext of buying a sandwich, but were only really there for the air-conditioning.

On 5th Street and Main Turbonutter screeched his De Lorean squad car to a halt outside the station and entered the main reception area, where the burly Sergeant was glancing over some apparently annoying paperwork on the desk in front of him.

"I'm here to see Detective Inspector Lexus and the prisoner," said Turbonutter, flashing his detective's badge under the Sergeant's nose. The Sergeant glanced Turbonutter over and pointed to a door leading off to the left.

"Down there, first door on the right," he grumbled.

Turbonutter made his way to the appointed room, and knocked sharply on the glass panel.

"Come in! Come in! Come in!" came the exasperated voice from the other side, and Turbonutter entered the small office, which seemed to be full of hot air and humid atmosphere. He saw Detective Inspector Lexus sitting on the swivel chair behind his desk, he seemed to be having a bad day.

"Damn airconditioning has packed in. Here's the prisoner, feel free to question him. Coffee?"

"Coffee would be fine thanks," replied Turbonutter, "black and strong please."

"Like your men?" quipped Lexus as he made his way out of the small cramped office.

Turbonutter ignored the snipe and turned to see a fat man in handcuffs sitting on a bench against the right hand wall of the office. He was rocking back and forth and staring at the noticeboard on the far side of the room, muttering to himself. Turbonutter decided on the 'good cop' routine to see how it went. He noticed the prisoner's file on the edge of the desk and picked it up.

"So, Steve, Steve Bulmer," started Turbonutter, glancing from the file to the man in front of him whilst he perched himself on the edge of the desk, "You work for Microsoft, right."

At the mention of the word Microsoft the man's eyes appeared to light up, his murmuring got louder, and Turbonutter could make out the words "I love this company," being mumbled over and over.

"So, Steve, the reason why I'm here. You used to work for Bill Gates."

Again the murmuring increased, this time to "I love that man, I love that man," over and over.

"So, Steve, Bill Gates' body has gone missing from his 'shrine' that he built in Washington DC. Can you give me any information on that?"

Steve Bulmer appeared to collapse from inside himself as he sat back on the bench and began to talk...

"Bill was a God, a legend before his time, a legend yet...mortal. I was horrified by his death. I'd bought an X-Box and everything, and now that Nintendo have bought up the copyright, all I get are kiddy games and muddy graphics on it. The death of Bill was a bad day for gamers everywhere."

Turbonutter sat back and listened to Steve as he continued talking in a quiet monotone.

"There are...people...who can't face the fact that he's dead you know. People trying to do something about that."

"Stefan, maybe?" said Turbonutter, glancing at the file again, pulling random pieces of information from it.

"Stefan doesn't exist, or does he?" replied Steve Bulmer, for the first time perfectly coherently.

"Says here that a fisherman spotted him off the coast of Pembroke a few years back, but didn't get much of a look."

"HA! NOONE knows what Stefan looks like! NOONE knows who he is, or if he exists. The biggest trick that the devil pulled off was convincing the world that he didn't exist."

"So, you think he exists?"

"I don't know," murmured Steve, "All I've heard is what you've heard, rumours. I've heard that he was working in Columbia, posted on a coffee plantation. Then I've heard that he was saving the gorillas in Cambodia in 1998, others say that he had handled a ceramic smuggling cartel out of Winscapola in 2001, who knows the truth? You can't hold me much longer you know, I have rights..."

Turbonutter thought this was going nowhere, the man was obviously a nobody. His search for Stefan would have to continue from another angle later on. If another angle presented itself that is.

"You're right, Steve, we've got nothing on you. You can go."

Steve Bulmer seemed to hesitate, as if for some reason afraid to leave.

"I said you can go..."

Steve got up and limped his way to the door, which opened as Detective Inspector Lexus brought back the coffee. Steve nearly bumped into him and apologised profusely before limping out the door again.

Lexus handed Turbonutter his coffee, and they both sipped in silence for a minute.

"I didn't know Bulmer was a cripple," mused Lexus, as he drank more of the hot drink from his 'Save the Gorillas in Cambodia' mug.

"Neither did I," said Turbonutter, placing his Ceramic mug on the edge of the desk and glancing at the file again. "Says here he had some kind of podium accident in 2001 at a Microsoft Meeting."

He glanced at Lexus and saw the picture of a gorilla on Lexus' cup. Something jarred in his memory. Something started an alarm bell ringing.

"Strange," said Lexus, taking another sip, "He wasn't limping when we arrested him."

Turbonutter had alarm bells going off in his head all over now, and he jumped up from the desk, knocking over his coffee cup as he did so, it shattered on the floor, tiny pieces of ceramic flying everywhere. He noticed that one of them had the words 'Made in Winscapola 2001' printed on it.

"Could it be?" he thought out loud to himself as he sprinted out of the office, trying to catch up with Steve Bulmer before he left the station.

But he was too late. As he dashed outside into the hot air of Seattle's 5th and Main, he was met with a crowded sidewalk of harassed commuters on their way home.

Steve Bulmer was nowhere to be seen...

Detective Inspector Turbonutter's search for Stefan would have to continue.

VenomByte's diary, 25th August.

Today was a little weird. Whilst we were in the nursery, pondering our next move, a strange man appeared, on behalf of a guy called Stefan Ramisté. He told us of the islands, and of Bill Gates, and how it all fits together. Sometimes I wonder if these things happen to us spontaneously, of if some entity is planning them for days, or weeks in advance.

More importantly though, we learnt that Bill Gates' mind is still alive. Apparently, he's going to be in this story too. (I snapped two 3B pencils writing that sentence). No, the group won't let me use pens anymore, or even hard pencils. For my own good, apparently.

But alas, I must stop writing, for they only let me out of the straight jacket for 5 miniutes at a time now. Until I get treatment, or recover from the shock.

-----------------------------

er-no drummed his fingers. The thing about time travel was, you had to be very careful about going forwards and backwards in time, and not disturbing any plotlines, or timelines for that matter. It took a lot of planning, and you couldn't just run about anywhere, you had to know what you were supposed to be doing.

This was the problem. He wasn't quite sure what to do, or even if he did it, he wasn't sure that it would all work out nicely.

So what did he know?

He knew that Meka would be interrogated and killed by what looked like gangsters, for witholding some kind of information, sometime in the future. Or the present, depending on where you were at the time. What else?

It was a good thing he'd gone back in time and stopped himself picking up the rest of the FOG crew, from some time in between the 'present' storyline and the future one, because if he'd gone through with that, things would have been messy, and people would have stopped writing in this plotline, wouldn't they?

Besides, he always worked alone.

So what to do now? That was obvious. He needed to know the point in time where Meka had become split up from the rest of the group, and change it. But how would he know where that was?

Ah, of course. He could go to the end of the story and ask the FOG crew.

Damn, no he couldn't, because they might not be alive if he didn't change the timeline.

er-no thought. He though about lots of things, like why they'd never gone back in time to prevent Bill Gates from ever existing. He though about how ignorant the FOG crew were that he had already been back in time, and stopped Ant from dying. They'd probably be quite confused about that. Little did they know how important Ant was going to be.

er-no decided to go back in time a bit, to somewhere shortly after the holy grail was found, and see what happened there, then maybe he'd know what to do......

Meanwhile.

The two guards continued chatting about their little jape with the funny little guy and the tank. It was at this point that someone tapped them on the back.

"I don't think that was very funny..." said a very angry Sniper.

Later that night, a couple of people taking their dog for a walk along the coast came across a curious tank with two german officer shaped holes in the side.

"It's ok." said the dark haired man to the woman holding the dog. "It's not part of the plot anymore..." and they carried on walking.

Four men sit apon four chairs... and although they don't realise it, the night is apon them. There are other people too.

"Hail brother Ant..." Grix joked. "What does thou bring us in this time of woe?"

They began to laugh.

"Hey, Meka, remember that time when you wrote in those Ewok eating creatures, and Grix turned them into the Anti Episode One group?" Ant said, with a chuckle.

"Yes." Meka said. "Yes. I do."

"And remember when that bloke Sn@ke appeared, and Pb wrote in Mongoose Man to combat him... that was a laugh too." Sheepy said.

"Grix...?" Fm said.

"Err... yes."

"There's one thing I wanted to tell you for a long time."

"Yeah? What?"

"Remember in the story we did after Turbonutter's film, you know... with the islands and time travel? Remember that bit you wrote in, just after we got trapped under the nursery?"

"Yeah...?"

"It sucked."

"Ok..." Grix said. "Ta."

------------

A door opened on the other side of the nursery, and a man stepped through.

"Hello... don't be alarmed. My name is Wookiee Monster."

"But... err... Hi!" Meka said, standing forward to shake Wookiee's hand. Wookiee looked at Meka's hand, and looked away.

"I'm here on behalf of my employer, to bring you a business... choice." They noticed that Wookiee was carrying a briefcase. Odd that. Didn't look like he was carrying one before.

"Employer? What?"

"Patience, my dear Ant, was never one of your virtues. Please try and listen. I... we, need your help."

"Firstly..." Meka said, "Who is we? Who are you working for?"

"We... we are working for Stefan Ramisté... I believe you may have heard of him."

Everyone in the room widened their eyes...

Stefan Ramisté. Let me tell you about Mr Ramisté.

He's a legend... never seen, heard from, ever. A ghost that has walked the breadth of time itself... why? Cheap games. That's why.

One time, Stefan came home, to find three men in his house, holding his family to ransom... they told him they would kill his family unless he gave them all his games... the cheap games he had gathered over the years.

One one swift movement, Stefan bought out his gun, and shot his wife and two children dead... and before shooting the men, told them that nothing in the world mattered to him more than his games.

"Jesus." Was all Grix could muster. "What the hell does he want with us?"

"I think it's a case of, if you can do it once, you can do it again." Wookiee told them.

"Hey?" FM said...

"Bill Gates. The Overlord..."

"No," Venombyte said, butting in. "If you're going to tell us he's back, and ready to give us another plot line, then you're wrong."

"No, he's not back. Yet. But, you may be able to help us stop him from returning."

------------------

The console war that occured in 2001 through 2005 was won easily by Microsoft... this led to a major market takeover by Microsoft, as Nintendo were forced to make games for them, and Sony were forced to make tvs and walkmans.

This meant a one console race... and what happened to cheap games? They vanished, each game costing about £200... and guess who got a bit annoyed.

So when Nintendo ceased trading, and the Microsoft head chips took control of the market, there was nothing that could be done about the situation.

Until, of course, our little gang killed Bill Gates. Microsoft fell apart, as if they were being controlled by one entity... (Read the Star Wars Thrawn trilogy for more information.)... and compensated for their wicked ways by allowing other consoles to be developed.

Cheap games were back. Stefan was a happy bunny.

However, it was said that Bill Gates would return one day in the future to haunt gaming once more...

------------

"If you step through these doors, you'll find the key to the Holy Grail. It's not what you're expecting." Wookiee finished. "I'll wait for you here."

Ant walked through the door first, and a long corridor lay ahead of him... The others followed.

The corridor went on for a while, and opened out to reveal that they were deep underground... water trickled down the walls, pools of water in the ground...

And a mouth of a cave stood before them.

FantasyMeister walked through... and turned on his torch.

They were in a perfectly circular room... the walls curved around perfectly...

"What... what the hell?"

The room was empty.

"Oh my God... look at the walls."

And on those beautifully curved walls, was a map. A map of the entire world.

"Wow... look at the detail." Fm said, astonished... "Look! There's my house!"

"No... that's just a fly."

"Oh yeah." The fly... flied away.

"What are these...?" Ant said, starring at the wall.

Twenty stars were marked out on the map. Each the same distance from each other, all over the world...

"The islands. The floating islands." FM said, waving the torch across the map again. The islands were joined by lines, tight across the earth like a net.

"So what has this got to do with the Holy Grail and Bill Gates?"

"Everything." Wookiee said, making everyone jump.

Wookiee walked out in front of the map, starring at the stars. "You see, the islands... they serve their purpose well. They were designed to reach heaven, and they did. They were designed to allow contact with God. They did that too... but that wasn't why they were designed."

Wookiee took a breath. "The islands are there to give life back to the dead. They raise the dead. Each island emits power across to eachother, covering the whole world, sucking life from it... and then, it drops it into one single spot, where the dead lies... and then awakens it... unfortunatly, we don't know where the spot is that the dead has to be..."

The gang listened on... "We believe it to be in one of these here stars, on an island... but we don't know which one."

"So..." Grix said. "Let me get this straight. Bill Gates is going to try and raise himself from the dead... who's organising all this? Why can't we just stop them?"

"Because we don't know who."

"And anyway, they can't raise him from the dead, because his body was destroyed..."

"But his mind is still alive." Wookiee said. "Very alive." He said again for dramatic impact. "Somewhere on a Street Fighter 2 cartridge..."

"No, that's not true. We smashed it to smither... smie... pieces."

"I think you have forgotten something. Go back and re-read the entire script to the Blade Runner story..."

"Can't you just tell us?"

"No."

-----------

Several hours later.

-----------

"That sucked."

"It doesn't matter... do you understand now?"

"No."

Wookiee sighed... "Bill Gates had the power to travel through any electric system. You thought you had trapped him because he was in a game... but all you did was prevent him from travelling through anything BUT games. Street Fighter 2 games, to be precise."

"What? This plot gets worse by the second... you're telling us that he travelled across the lengths and breadths of time... to another Street Fighter 2 cartridge?"

"Yes." Wookiee smiled.

"So, someone was playing it at that precise moment?"

"Yes. We don't know who, but we know it happened."

Meka coughed.

The intrepid explorers eventually emerged exhausted from the end of the expansive elaborate tunnel.

"So, we've just sneaked inside a german miliatary fort-type thing?" asked Meka

"or snuck" said FM, "I'm not entirely sure on the past tense of the 'sneak' infinitive."

"How far are we likely to get before being captured, then?"

"Isn't it better style to save the dialog until after the surroundings have been described?"

"Ah yes, of course" replied Meka, turning to look at the....

At the nursery they appeared to be in.

"A nursery?" FM exclaimed (which is very hard to do with a question mark)

There was no doubt about it though. A blue cloudy wallpaper pattern, interspersed with pictures of large yellow jumbo jets, and a rather inviting lush green carpet, which was interspersed (mental note: Try to increase your vocabulary) with glossy white cots.

"A nursery!" exclaimed FM, this time with rather more success.

"How did we get to be in a nursery?" asked YH. "Are we still in the German military complex?"

-----------------------

In a far distant dimension, Dr Who was very annoyed. Someone had stolen his tardis. Again. Luckily they hadn't stloen it yet, if that makes any sense. It was just something that would happen on this timeline, unless of course, he stopped it...and who knows what disiaster that might cause for the FOG crew?

...where he sat for a moment, looking at the unfamiliar controls laid out in front of him.

Taking his life into his own hands, he pulled the nearest lever towards him.

The hatch on the main cannon flipped open, the shell that had been preloaded earlier slid out, and landed on the floor of the tank with what could only be described accurately as a 30 kilo-tonne explosive force, which shot Sniper straight upwards through the tank's hatch and into the air, where a passing Concorde sucked him into it's starboard jet engine, spraying him out into its jetstream in tiny little pieces.

The Germans saw this, and laughed their big Germanic belly-laughs, cracking witty jokes about seagulls and aeroplanes that lost a lot in the English-translation, so I won't bother.

They all ran crouched... and ran through the small tunnel...

Well, all except Sniper.

He, for some reason, stayed in the boat, as it trundled along the sea, and lay into the sand. He began to turn the large wheel on the front of the boat, and the front of the lifeboat opened.

Immedietly, gun fire surrounded him, and he ducked for cover. He then ran crouched up the beachhead, diving behind a barbed wire fence...

Time suddenly slowed down for Sniper... bullets whizzing past his head... zipping into the water, the boat lay useless, destroyed by the fire..

He walked a little further, bullets still missing him.

--------------

"What iz up with siz guy? Ve can't hit him!"

"ZEND IN ZI TANK!"

-------------

A tank rolled down the beach, squashing all the barbed wire as it headed directly for Sniper...

It came closer, and Sniper dived under the tank. It tried to turn, to run over him... but Sniper kept shimmying around under it.

The tank drove away fast, leaving Sniper with his head in the sand... it turned around, took aim, and fired a missle at Sniper's bottom.

The force fired Sniper directly into the ground, leaving a large crater of sand, about ten metres in diameter and deep, and a pair of feet sticking out at the bottom.

The hatch of the tank opened, and a german pulled himself out... he looked around, and walked down the crater. He looked at the shoes sticking out at the bottom. And picked them up.

Normally, when you remove shoes, there should be feet left. But for some reason, there wasn't. And thanks to Sniper's rather aerodynamic design, and his pointed head, Sniper was still attached to those shoes.

And Sniper took his chance. He willed all his might into his fist, and punched the german as hard as he could in his face.

The german, taken by surprise, fell straight to the ground. Sniper danced for joy, and climbed into the tank...

The Germans sat there, eating sandwiches and watching the lifeboat get closer.

"Hans?" said one of them as he turned to his mate.

"Vat?" asked the other, still eating a sandwich.

"Vy do ve speek in ze funny accent?" asked Hans.

"You know zat it iz relguation, Hans. Bezides, it imprezzez ze torizts..."

"ok." said Hans, and went on eating.

----

Ant sat at the back of the boat, sulking. "I still don't have a clue what's going on. You guys never tell me anything."

FM tutted and looked at Ant. "We're going towards what looks like a heavily fortified island, most likely full of people who will hamper our progress on the way to the grail." he explained wearily.

"Ah. And if it's so heavily fortified, how are we going to get in?" asked Ant, perking up a bit.

Grix turned around at this point and smiled. "Simple. When anyone builds a heavily fortified island, there is always an underground cave at sea level, just out of site of the bunkers. One of the great laws of nature that."

"Cool!" said Ant and cheered up a bit.

They reached the edge of the island, just out of site from the bunkers and snacking German guards, and there it was. Just as Grix had said, an underground cave. They sailed through the cave, past colourful rocks and the sound of dripping water echoing around the curved walls.

"It's a bit light in here." said Ant, quite surprised at the amount of colourful spot lights in the roof and floor of the cave.

"Ah, that will be for the tourists. They love to look at the rock features." said Meka as they came to a halt by a convenient flat piece of land.

"DAMN!"

Meka turned, and looked up at Snake... who pointed straight forward. Dan2K1 was at the helm, still muttering to himself... and beyond him lay a beach.

"LAND! LAND!"

Meka ran back down into the galley, where everyone had convinced Dan that the cards needed a good clean... everyboduy decided to only clean five cards at a time, and just changed them as they pleased.

"There's land ahead... if we're going to get rid of Dan, now's the time." Meka said... and the others jumped to their feet. They ran up onto deck, and watched as Snake dived into the water and swam for shore. They all rushed in a mass panicked whole, and threw the lifeboat into the water and jumped in before Dan noticed.

"My cottage is too small... perhaps I should make a new one..."

Dan saw the land, and pulled the boat away, and sailed into the distance...

The rest of the group pulled Snake on board the already overpacked lifeboat, and they sailed off towards the beach...

-----------

"What iz zat?" A german shouted, pointing at the sea...

"Iz ze lifeboat... I am glad that ve set up ze barbed wire and bunkers."

The germans watched as the boat trundled slowly towards the beach head...