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President New Jimmy was lying in bed, trying to sleep. Thoughts troubled him, and he tossed and turned, unable to calm himself.
The Chinese were annoying him, and he was so busy that he never had time for his family.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. President New Jimmy called, “Come in.”
No one entered. “Come in!” The President said, annoyed.
Nothing.
Then, the knocking came again. The President slowly got up, put on his dressing gown, and catiously walked over to the door.
Slowly, he turned the handle, and peered outside. Nothing. There was no one there.
The President shut the door. He was just getting back into bed when there was another knock at the door.
President New Jimmy was very annoyed. He walked straight up to the door, opened it, and marched outside.
“Look, whoever’s playing pranks, it’s not funny. I’m the President, you will respect me!”
New Jimmy walked back into his room, and slammed the door shut. As he was getting back into bed, he realized something. There were no guards outside his door. That was very strange, as President New Jimmy demanded guards outside his door.
New Jimmy looked around his room, worried. Nothing. The President decided he was being silly, and he got back into bed.
He closed his eyes.
He opened them again. Suddenly, a hand was clamped over his mouth. The President looked up, and saw……well, he had no idea what he saw.
This…..thing, stared into New Jimmy’s eyes, and said in a low, deadly voice, “See you in Hell,”
Then, it pointed it’s finger at President New Jimmy, and strange beams emitted from it. These beams flew straight at the President, and New Jimmy began to shake. New Jimmy was in tremendous pain, and he would have been screaming if a hand hadn’t been clamped over his mouth.
The President’s eyes rolled back into his head, and this…thing, let Jimmy out of his grasp.
The President fell to the floor, dead.
This monster left a note on the body of the President.
It said, “You’ve been seen to, by the Wookiee Monster.”
_________________________ ___________________________________
The phone rang. M16 picked it up.
“Hello, who is it please?”
“Greetings. You don’t know me but I know everything about you,”
“Is this a prank call? If it is, then it’s a crap one,”
“Listen, you have to believe me, I am letting you know that there has been an incedent involving President New Jimmy. He has been murdered.”
“How can this be?? I’m sure that if the President was dead, it would have been all over the news!”
“Just listen. You, your brother, and your associate, are the only people who can find the man who killed him.
“How would you know? You mean, you can see into the future?”
That is not your business, but you will find out soon enough.”
“How do I know if your telling the truth or not?!”
“You have to believe me. The person who killed the President will not stop, and you are the only people who can destroy him.”
“Why us??”
“You will find out soon enough. Get Ant and saesee, and only then will I tell you more. I will be in touch,” He hung up.
“Um…hello?”
M16 slumped on his sofa, and rakced his brains about what he should do now. He began to shake and sweat rapidly, as he was very, very scared. He tried to make himself feel better by saying in his mind that it was all a bunch of lies, but he couldn’t help but feel concerned for the President, and worried about whether it was his duty to find the killer. In the end, M16 decided he ought to call Ant (his brother) and saesee. Then, he would decided what to do.
The Chinese were annoying him, and he was so busy that he never had time for his family.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. President New Jimmy called, “Come in.”
No one entered. “Come in!” The President said, annoyed.
Nothing.
Then, the knocking came again. The President slowly got up, put on his dressing gown, and catiously walked over to the door.
Slowly, he turned the handle, and peered outside. Nothing. There was no one there.
The President shut the door. He was just getting back into bed when there was another knock at the door.
President New Jimmy was very annoyed. He walked straight up to the door, opened it, and marched outside.
“Look, whoever’s playing pranks, it’s not funny. I’m the President, you will respect me!”
New Jimmy walked back into his room, and slammed the door shut. As he was getting back into bed, he realized something. There were no guards outside his door. That was very strange, as President New Jimmy demanded guards outside his door.
New Jimmy looked around his room, worried. Nothing. The President decided he was being silly, and he got back into bed.
He closed his eyes.
He opened them again. Suddenly, a hand was clamped over his mouth. The President looked up, and saw……well, he had no idea what he saw.
This…..thing, stared into New Jimmy’s eyes, and said in a low, deadly voice, “See you in Hell,”
Then, it pointed it’s finger at President New Jimmy, and strange beams emitted from it. These beams flew straight at the President, and New Jimmy began to shake. New Jimmy was in tremendous pain, and he would have been screaming if a hand hadn’t been clamped over his mouth.
The President’s eyes rolled back into his head, and this…thing, let Jimmy out of his grasp.
The President fell to the floor, dead.
This monster left a note on the body of the President.
It said, “You’ve been seen to, by the Wookiee Monster.”
_________________________ ___________________________________
The phone rang. M16 picked it up.
“Hello, who is it please?”
“Greetings. You don’t know me but I know everything about you,”
“Is this a prank call? If it is, then it’s a crap one,”
“Listen, you have to believe me, I am letting you know that there has been an incedent involving President New Jimmy. He has been murdered.”
“How can this be?? I’m sure that if the President was dead, it would have been all over the news!”
“Just listen. You, your brother, and your associate, are the only people who can find the man who killed him.
“How would you know? You mean, you can see into the future?”
That is not your business, but you will find out soon enough.”
“How do I know if your telling the truth or not?!”
“You have to believe me. The person who killed the President will not stop, and you are the only people who can destroy him.”
“Why us??”
“You will find out soon enough. Get Ant and saesee, and only then will I tell you more. I will be in touch,” He hung up.
“Um…hello?”
M16 slumped on his sofa, and rakced his brains about what he should do now. He began to shake and sweat rapidly, as he was very, very scared. He tried to make himself feel better by saying in his mind that it was all a bunch of lies, but he couldn’t help but feel concerned for the President, and worried about whether it was his duty to find the killer. In the end, M16 decided he ought to call Ant (his brother) and saesee. Then, he would decided what to do.
Page:
Meanwhile, Wookiee sat and watched, as Ant sneaked off to the kitchen.
Wookiee's emotionless face turned to one of happiness, as Ant picked up a glass vase and then dropped it purposefully.
Ant then began smashing all the kitchen windows with his fists. Wookiee laughed.
"What the hell!?" YH shouted, and sprinted into the kitchen.
There he found Ant, who was just about to pour baked beans all over the floor.
"What are you doing?!?"
Ant threw the tin of beans at YH, sneered, and then launched himself into the air. He smashed straight through the air, and looked down onto the rest of the posse.
Ant targeted M16, and then seemingly flew straight towards him.
Ant became faster and faster, until he was like a human missile!
He was just about to hit M16 head on, when saesee grabbed him out of the way.
Ant smashed head first into the tiled kitchen floor.
"The...the impact....it would've killed him!" M16 cried, his face contorted in horror.
Blood was pouring from Ant's head.
"He's gonna die!" M16 screamed. "Wookiee must be controlling him, he would never try to kill me! And anyway, how would he be able to fly like that!?"
"He's right." YH said. YH then looked at Ant's motionless body, and said, "But I don't think it matters any more."
Just as YH said this, blood stopped pouring out of Ant, and he began to move.
Ant groaned and sat up, completely healed of his wounds.
"W-w-whaa..what just happened?" He asked nervously.
Wookiee's emotionless face turned to one of happiness, as Ant picked up a glass vase and then dropped it purposefully.
Ant then began smashing all the kitchen windows with his fists. Wookiee laughed.
"What the hell!?" YH shouted, and sprinted into the kitchen.
There he found Ant, who was just about to pour baked beans all over the floor.
"What are you doing?!?"
Ant threw the tin of beans at YH, sneered, and then launched himself into the air. He smashed straight through the air, and looked down onto the rest of the posse.
Ant targeted M16, and then seemingly flew straight towards him.
Ant became faster and faster, until he was like a human missile!
He was just about to hit M16 head on, when saesee grabbed him out of the way.
Ant smashed head first into the tiled kitchen floor.
"The...the impact....it would've killed him!" M16 cried, his face contorted in horror.
Blood was pouring from Ant's head.
"He's gonna die!" M16 screamed. "Wookiee must be controlling him, he would never try to kill me! And anyway, how would he be able to fly like that!?"
"He's right." YH said. YH then looked at Ant's motionless body, and said, "But I don't think it matters any more."
Just as YH said this, blood stopped pouring out of Ant, and he began to move.
Ant groaned and sat up, completely healed of his wounds.
"W-w-whaa..what just happened?" He asked nervously.
"Ok so i figure that wasn't that the best of plans" TW confessed.
Maybe if i.....no. or what if i....no. or how about..."
"SHUTTUP" everyone yelled.
"well!!" TW sounded offended.
"I will just have to wriglle out then"
but then he had a new plan
"ill eat the towels" he cried
"i might get sick or suffer internally....but". he considered
So he knawed his way through 10 towels and finally fell out
with bits of material falling from his mouth.
They then gave him somew lucozade to wash it down with but
it was too late he was already.....
Maybe if i.....no. or what if i....no. or how about..."
"SHUTTUP" everyone yelled.
"well!!" TW sounded offended.
"I will just have to wriglle out then"
but then he had a new plan
"ill eat the towels" he cried
"i might get sick or suffer internally....but". he considered
So he knawed his way through 10 towels and finally fell out
with bits of material falling from his mouth.
They then gave him somew lucozade to wash it down with but
it was too late he was already.....
'Ello? 'ooo is it?" Said the voice at the end of the phone.
"This is the Tarrant residence, can i help you?"
"Can I phone a friend?"
"Only if you hang up from me.
"Ok, bye".
And that was that, quite bizarre. Tarrant shook his head to himself (quite tricky that, took him ages to get it just right), and went about finding his spare keys.
Eduardo emerged from the kitchen with a pot of tea. Dressed in his apron as he was, he looked like something out of the PG tips advert, (NOTE, other teas are available).
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Here, YH, I've got an idea." Said TW
"Another one? Blimey, you're on a roll today aren't you?"
"Haha" said TW, without mirth. "I'm being serious. If you leave the heating on, I'll sweat, and then i'll lose weight quicker. I could be out of here in," TW's lips moved as he quickly calculated, "3 months!"
YH quickly coughed, "How long!?!"
"Well, if you raise the temperature to 30 degree's in the house, i will sweat at approximately 3 litres of liquid in 12 hours....."
Someone in the group raised their eyebrows in dispair.
"...this will ensure that over the course of...."
"Look, we're just going to go find Tarrant. Then we're going to ask Pete Tong what he knows. THEN Zita will tell us what she knows. Once we've done that we may be able to graps where the hell this storyline is going."
".... I've calculated that if i lose 5 stone, that will make my waist small enough to get out of this airing cupboard." TW beamed at everyone, impervious to the fact that they had ignored him.
"This is the Tarrant residence, can i help you?"
"Can I phone a friend?"
"Only if you hang up from me.
"Ok, bye".
And that was that, quite bizarre. Tarrant shook his head to himself (quite tricky that, took him ages to get it just right), and went about finding his spare keys.
Eduardo emerged from the kitchen with a pot of tea. Dressed in his apron as he was, he looked like something out of the PG tips advert, (NOTE, other teas are available).
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Here, YH, I've got an idea." Said TW
"Another one? Blimey, you're on a roll today aren't you?"
"Haha" said TW, without mirth. "I'm being serious. If you leave the heating on, I'll sweat, and then i'll lose weight quicker. I could be out of here in," TW's lips moved as he quickly calculated, "3 months!"
YH quickly coughed, "How long!?!"
"Well, if you raise the temperature to 30 degree's in the house, i will sweat at approximately 3 litres of liquid in 12 hours....."
Someone in the group raised their eyebrows in dispair.
"...this will ensure that over the course of...."
"Look, we're just going to go find Tarrant. Then we're going to ask Pete Tong what he knows. THEN Zita will tell us what she knows. Once we've done that we may be able to graps where the hell this storyline is going."
".... I've calculated that if i lose 5 stone, that will make my waist small enough to get out of this airing cupboard." TW beamed at everyone, impervious to the fact that they had ignored him.
"I've got it!" yelled TW.
"Ok, so what do we do?" asked M16.
"You guys do nothing! Or go and find Tarrant or something."
"Thats not the best plan I've heard for releasing someone from a cupboard!" muttered YH, more for Zita's benefit than TW's. YH had taken quite a shine to Zita. She looked so fine when she was all stressed and helpless.
"So what do you do then TW? While we're off finding Tarrant I mean." asked Ant.
"I'll be working on getting out of here!"
".. and how do you intend on getting out on your own?"
"Starvation is the key! If I don't eat for a few days and exercise by struggling for my freedom every now and then, I should be out of here by the end of the week!"
YH thought this was an excellent idea, one less person to get in his path to finding love with Zita and no serious structural damage to his house! Where was the downside?
"You don't mind me staying here for the week, do you YH?"
Bingo.
-------- -------- ---------
Tarrant fumbled through his pockets in search of his keys. He tried ringing his doorbell again, surely Eduardo would be awake by now!
Tarrant could feel the keys in his coat but when he went into his pocket they weren't there. Confused by this he decided to stop fumbling and try to figure out how this could happen.
Finally it dawned on him. He unzipped his coat and looked at his inside pocket. As suspected, there was a sizeable hole at the bottom. His keys must have found their way down there.
Tarrant took his coat right off and toar the whole further so he could fit his hand inside. Fumbling re-commenced.
His whole arm had now been swalloed by the coat as he desperately tried to grasp the bunch of keys that seemed to be making a special effort to evade him. He, impatiently toar the coat further and further until the inner lining had been almost completely removed, finally he caught site of the keys.
As he let go of the piece of linign in order to grasp his keys, he realised that he had let go of the material that had been supporting them.
He dropped his coat onto the wet ground and grabbed at thin air as he watched his keys fall toward the floor. He stuck a foot out to try and cushion the key's fall and spare his novelty key ring.
His foot caught the keys and knocked them towars the broken grating at the bottom of the drain pipe.
Though moving at a rate that would almost definately spare the keyring, Tarrant had managed to angle his kick, quite accidently, so the small bunch of keys sailed perfectly through the whole in the grating and dropped down into the murky filth below.
Eduardo, dressed in only a towel, opened the door.
"Sorry Tarrant, I was in the bath."
Tarrant, who was now on his hands and knees stared up at Eduardo.
"Jeez, what happened to your coat Tarrant? Did Wookie get you or something?"
Tarrant returned to his feet.
"Well almost, I had to jump out of YH's window to get away. Wookie almost had me, he got hold of my coat as I plummeted toward earth but I managed to tear myself free before he could pull me back up!"
"Are the others ok?"
"They should be, they were hidden in the airing cupboard last I saw!"
"What happened to your keys?"
"erm... lets just foget about the whole Wookie escapade and put the kettle on! We've some plotting to do."
Tarrant and Eduardo returned inside for a nice cup of tea.
Almost as soon as Tarrant took his first sip, the phone started ringing.
Tarrant picked it up.
"Hello"
"Ok, so what do we do?" asked M16.
"You guys do nothing! Or go and find Tarrant or something."
"Thats not the best plan I've heard for releasing someone from a cupboard!" muttered YH, more for Zita's benefit than TW's. YH had taken quite a shine to Zita. She looked so fine when she was all stressed and helpless.
"So what do you do then TW? While we're off finding Tarrant I mean." asked Ant.
"I'll be working on getting out of here!"
".. and how do you intend on getting out on your own?"
"Starvation is the key! If I don't eat for a few days and exercise by struggling for my freedom every now and then, I should be out of here by the end of the week!"
YH thought this was an excellent idea, one less person to get in his path to finding love with Zita and no serious structural damage to his house! Where was the downside?
"You don't mind me staying here for the week, do you YH?"
Bingo.
-------- -------- ---------
Tarrant fumbled through his pockets in search of his keys. He tried ringing his doorbell again, surely Eduardo would be awake by now!
Tarrant could feel the keys in his coat but when he went into his pocket they weren't there. Confused by this he decided to stop fumbling and try to figure out how this could happen.
Finally it dawned on him. He unzipped his coat and looked at his inside pocket. As suspected, there was a sizeable hole at the bottom. His keys must have found their way down there.
Tarrant took his coat right off and toar the whole further so he could fit his hand inside. Fumbling re-commenced.
His whole arm had now been swalloed by the coat as he desperately tried to grasp the bunch of keys that seemed to be making a special effort to evade him. He, impatiently toar the coat further and further until the inner lining had been almost completely removed, finally he caught site of the keys.
As he let go of the piece of linign in order to grasp his keys, he realised that he had let go of the material that had been supporting them.
He dropped his coat onto the wet ground and grabbed at thin air as he watched his keys fall toward the floor. He stuck a foot out to try and cushion the key's fall and spare his novelty key ring.
His foot caught the keys and knocked them towars the broken grating at the bottom of the drain pipe.
Though moving at a rate that would almost definately spare the keyring, Tarrant had managed to angle his kick, quite accidently, so the small bunch of keys sailed perfectly through the whole in the grating and dropped down into the murky filth below.
Eduardo, dressed in only a towel, opened the door.
"Sorry Tarrant, I was in the bath."
Tarrant, who was now on his hands and knees stared up at Eduardo.
"Jeez, what happened to your coat Tarrant? Did Wookie get you or something?"
Tarrant returned to his feet.
"Well almost, I had to jump out of YH's window to get away. Wookie almost had me, he got hold of my coat as I plummeted toward earth but I managed to tear myself free before he could pull me back up!"
"Are the others ok?"
"They should be, they were hidden in the airing cupboard last I saw!"
"What happened to your keys?"
"erm... lets just foget about the whole Wookie escapade and put the kettle on! We've some plotting to do."
Tarrant and Eduardo returned inside for a nice cup of tea.
Almost as soon as Tarrant took his first sip, the phone started ringing.
Tarrant picked it up.
"Hello"
Time_WArp's plan was simple but he would have to act fast
as his neck was starting to ache.
He asked Yh to pull his leg.
"why" Yh asked puzzled.
"just do it" TW hissed
so yh pulled his leg only to find that TW farted at him.
"you little...." YH cried.
"sorry" said Tw
Now i need the whole gang here to help me.
When they were all there, Tw asked each of them to grab a towel.
they all grabbed one and then pulled.
No luck
but then TW had another cunning plan.
...........
as his neck was starting to ache.
He asked Yh to pull his leg.
"why" Yh asked puzzled.
"just do it" TW hissed
so yh pulled his leg only to find that TW farted at him.
"you little...." YH cried.
"sorry" said Tw
Now i need the whole gang here to help me.
When they were all there, Tw asked each of them to grab a towel.
they all grabbed one and then pulled.
No luck
but then TW had another cunning plan.
...........
YH sniffed.
"Ok, own up, who farted?" HE whispered into the dark, now smelly, air of the airing cupboard.
"What is that?" Asked TW.
"My foot, now stop moaning!"
"And this?"
"It's best if you don't know" Replied YH, to who the phrase 'house cleaning' was as foreign as the word 'bicycle' to a fish.
The whispered conversation had begun as soon as the group had heard Wookiee walk away from the airing cupboard. Towards where Tarrant had gone.
Just after Wookiee had wondered off, the had been a scream, as if someone had realised their only option was to jump out of a window 6 stories up. There had then been a muffled crash, the sounds of Wookiee going back down the stairs, and the front door closing.
"I think we can get out now." Said one of the group whose name esacpes the author at this moment.
"We can't" said TW.
"Of course we can, what are you talking about? Wookiee's gone, we have to get out and go and find Tarrant."
"No, i mean i can't. Im stuck"
He was right. The others climbed out of the airing cupboard, leaving TW well and truely wedged in with the towels.
In the end the idea was for the group to pull him out. They each tried to grab hold of a leg or an arm, and pulled for all their might. Alas, it was to no avail. TW was resolutely stuck in the cupbaord.
In the end, he came up with a cunning idea to get him out.
"Ok, own up, who farted?" HE whispered into the dark, now smelly, air of the airing cupboard.
"What is that?" Asked TW.
"My foot, now stop moaning!"
"And this?"
"It's best if you don't know" Replied YH, to who the phrase 'house cleaning' was as foreign as the word 'bicycle' to a fish.
The whispered conversation had begun as soon as the group had heard Wookiee walk away from the airing cupboard. Towards where Tarrant had gone.
Just after Wookiee had wondered off, the had been a scream, as if someone had realised their only option was to jump out of a window 6 stories up. There had then been a muffled crash, the sounds of Wookiee going back down the stairs, and the front door closing.
"I think we can get out now." Said one of the group whose name esacpes the author at this moment.
"We can't" said TW.
"Of course we can, what are you talking about? Wookiee's gone, we have to get out and go and find Tarrant."
"No, i mean i can't. Im stuck"
He was right. The others climbed out of the airing cupboard, leaving TW well and truely wedged in with the towels.
In the end the idea was for the group to pull him out. They each tried to grab hold of a leg or an arm, and pulled for all their might. Alas, it was to no avail. TW was resolutely stuck in the cupbaord.
In the end, he came up with a cunning idea to get him out.
... Zita. She rushed through the door and slammed what was left of it behind her, then she took hold of Ant and through him to the floor.
"Hey what do you think you're doing?" yelled Ant, who though not physically injured by Zita's actions, was now nursing some pretty hurt feelings.
Zita ignored Ant's question and began lifting the sofa on which Ant had been sat. Struggling with the rather cumbersome sofa, Zita looked round the room in search of support. As Saesee approached to offer a hand, YH stopped him in his tracks.
"Okay Zita, before this goes any further you're going to have to tell us just what is going on." YH said.
"It's Wookie!" she said "He's following me. You have to help me hide, I have very important news to deliver and I can't do that if Wookie has ripped out my tongue!"
The gang began shifting all the nearby furniture infront of the close approximation of a front door. All xcept Tarrant that is, who was about to raise an interesting point.
"Zita, why don't you just deliver the news now? Then we won't have to move any furniture and we can all escape while Wookie is stealing your, by then unneccesary, tongue!"
Tarrant's argument was largely ignored, but for YH who appeared to be considering Tarrants point of view very carefully before resuming furniture re arrangements.
Tarrant gave up and decided to pitch in.
As the last fold-away table was being put in place, a loud bang came from behind the furniture. Then another.
"Its Wookie!" cried M16.
"That furniture won't hold him for long, quick somebody think of something." Zita pleaded.
"We could always just hide and pretend nobody is in, that usually works on my loan shark!" suggested Tarrant.
"I know" began YH "We could all hide in the airing cupboard!"
The group, as one, shifted briskly up the stairs towards YH's airing cupboard. The door was slung open and Tarrant and YH ushered everyone in. Ant and Tarrant, one above one below, were helping YH into the cupboard as the familiar clang of YH's fold-away table hitting the floor sounded through the house.
"Hurry up!" whispered TW from the back.
YH got in and began trying to make room for Tarrant.
"Come on you lot! Shift up a bit!" YH whispered impatiently.
"We can't, we're completely out of room" came a muffled voice that YH couldn't quite ut his finger on.
Damn that TW! YH thought to himself.
"Sorry Tarrant! You're gonna have to find someplace else!"
"What do you mean? Make some room god dammit!" Tarrant was filled with fear and frustration.
"There is no room!" YH said frantically as Wookies footsteps began to come up the stairs.
"Sorry Tarrant, you're on your own!" Zita said before shutting the door, quietly but tightly, locking Tarrant out.
Tarrant had to think fast. He quickly and silently made his way to the back of YH's house to give himself more time.
He could hear Wookie at the top of the stairs, begin to poke and prod around the place.
As Wookie checked the rooms one by one, it was clear to Tarrant that he would have to get out of here soon. There was no place to hide in the 'spare' room in which he now found himself.
With the door closed Tarrant couldn't hear too much of what was happening outside. Suddenly, Wookies footsteps began to get louder as he got closer to the room Tarrant was in.
Think fast Tarrant, think fast. Tarrant thought to himself. A flash of inspiration hit him, if he couldn't get out of the door and he couldn't stay in the room, then the window was the only option!
Tarrant slid the ample window open and began to climb out. He lowered himself as far down as he could and dropped down to the floor below just as Wookie kicked the door open.
---------- ----------- --------
Tarrant was in the clear.... for now. But what of the others? It was clear that Wookie wasn't leaving anytime soon. With the posse (less Tarrant) stuck in the airing cupboard, it was up to Tarrant to do something.
But what? He knew one thing, h would be much better off with Eduardo!
Tarrant made his way back to his house to fetch Eduardo, leaving the others stuck in the airing cupboard....
"Hey what do you think you're doing?" yelled Ant, who though not physically injured by Zita's actions, was now nursing some pretty hurt feelings.
Zita ignored Ant's question and began lifting the sofa on which Ant had been sat. Struggling with the rather cumbersome sofa, Zita looked round the room in search of support. As Saesee approached to offer a hand, YH stopped him in his tracks.
"Okay Zita, before this goes any further you're going to have to tell us just what is going on." YH said.
"It's Wookie!" she said "He's following me. You have to help me hide, I have very important news to deliver and I can't do that if Wookie has ripped out my tongue!"
The gang began shifting all the nearby furniture infront of the close approximation of a front door. All xcept Tarrant that is, who was about to raise an interesting point.
"Zita, why don't you just deliver the news now? Then we won't have to move any furniture and we can all escape while Wookie is stealing your, by then unneccesary, tongue!"
Tarrant's argument was largely ignored, but for YH who appeared to be considering Tarrants point of view very carefully before resuming furniture re arrangements.
Tarrant gave up and decided to pitch in.
As the last fold-away table was being put in place, a loud bang came from behind the furniture. Then another.
"Its Wookie!" cried M16.
"That furniture won't hold him for long, quick somebody think of something." Zita pleaded.
"We could always just hide and pretend nobody is in, that usually works on my loan shark!" suggested Tarrant.
"I know" began YH "We could all hide in the airing cupboard!"
The group, as one, shifted briskly up the stairs towards YH's airing cupboard. The door was slung open and Tarrant and YH ushered everyone in. Ant and Tarrant, one above one below, were helping YH into the cupboard as the familiar clang of YH's fold-away table hitting the floor sounded through the house.
"Hurry up!" whispered TW from the back.
YH got in and began trying to make room for Tarrant.
"Come on you lot! Shift up a bit!" YH whispered impatiently.
"We can't, we're completely out of room" came a muffled voice that YH couldn't quite ut his finger on.
Damn that TW! YH thought to himself.
"Sorry Tarrant! You're gonna have to find someplace else!"
"What do you mean? Make some room god dammit!" Tarrant was filled with fear and frustration.
"There is no room!" YH said frantically as Wookies footsteps began to come up the stairs.
"Sorry Tarrant, you're on your own!" Zita said before shutting the door, quietly but tightly, locking Tarrant out.
Tarrant had to think fast. He quickly and silently made his way to the back of YH's house to give himself more time.
He could hear Wookie at the top of the stairs, begin to poke and prod around the place.
As Wookie checked the rooms one by one, it was clear to Tarrant that he would have to get out of here soon. There was no place to hide in the 'spare' room in which he now found himself.
With the door closed Tarrant couldn't hear too much of what was happening outside. Suddenly, Wookies footsteps began to get louder as he got closer to the room Tarrant was in.
Think fast Tarrant, think fast. Tarrant thought to himself. A flash of inspiration hit him, if he couldn't get out of the door and he couldn't stay in the room, then the window was the only option!
Tarrant slid the ample window open and began to climb out. He lowered himself as far down as he could and dropped down to the floor below just as Wookie kicked the door open.
---------- ----------- --------
Tarrant was in the clear.... for now. But what of the others? It was clear that Wookie wasn't leaving anytime soon. With the posse (less Tarrant) stuck in the airing cupboard, it was up to Tarrant to do something.
But what? He knew one thing, h would be much better off with Eduardo!
Tarrant made his way back to his house to fetch Eduardo, leaving the others stuck in the airing cupboard....
Wookiee stared back into the translucent face before him.
"It shall be as you say, oh master", he bowed low, then turned and stalked out of the cave, his cape swishing around him in true Hollywood style.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
YH was obviously in one of his stupid moods. He had just suggested phoning Zita, when Tarrant pointed out:
"We don't actually have her number, YH".
"Don't we? Oh. Well. Yes. Of course, i knew that... umm, i, er, that is, yes thats it. I was going to send Time_Warp out to get it. Let him throw his weight about sort of thing.
"Is that wise? He may cause some serious damage, you know, to buildings and buses, that sort of thing" Interrupted Ant, who was sitting on th sofa.
"Bloody hell! Where did you come from?"
"Well, I was attacked by a duck, and i had to run away, so i came here."
"How did you know we were here?" Asked Tarrant.
"YH took his shoes off," said Ant.
"How did you know?" asked YH.
"YH, when was the last time yo blew your nose?"
"Ummm, what year is this?"
"2001?"
"Really? Gosh, well about 3 years 6 months 2 weeks 1 day and about, oh, 4 hours."
"Do it now"
YH then proceded to blow his nose, the following happened in quick succesion, it has been slowed down to allow ease of telling:
As soon as YH took the tissue from his nose, he gagged, tried to run out of the room. Around this time there was a knock at the door. YH turned around to run to the back door, be knocked into Time_Warp, who fell into the fish tank. The fish tank then broke, water and fish cascading everywhere. The door was kicked in, and it turned out to be......
"It shall be as you say, oh master", he bowed low, then turned and stalked out of the cave, his cape swishing around him in true Hollywood style.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
YH was obviously in one of his stupid moods. He had just suggested phoning Zita, when Tarrant pointed out:
"We don't actually have her number, YH".
"Don't we? Oh. Well. Yes. Of course, i knew that... umm, i, er, that is, yes thats it. I was going to send Time_Warp out to get it. Let him throw his weight about sort of thing.
"Is that wise? He may cause some serious damage, you know, to buildings and buses, that sort of thing" Interrupted Ant, who was sitting on th sofa.
"Bloody hell! Where did you come from?"
"Well, I was attacked by a duck, and i had to run away, so i came here."
"How did you know we were here?" Asked Tarrant.
"YH took his shoes off," said Ant.
"How did you know?" asked YH.
"YH, when was the last time yo blew your nose?"
"Ummm, what year is this?"
"2001?"
"Really? Gosh, well about 3 years 6 months 2 weeks 1 day and about, oh, 4 hours."
"Do it now"
YH then proceded to blow his nose, the following happened in quick succesion, it has been slowed down to allow ease of telling:
As soon as YH took the tissue from his nose, he gagged, tried to run out of the room. Around this time there was a knock at the door. YH turned around to run to the back door, be knocked into Time_Warp, who fell into the fish tank. The fish tank then broke, water and fish cascading everywhere. The door was kicked in, and it turned out to be......
... Tarrant regained conciousness.
"I've got it!" he exclaimed.
"Got what?" M16 inquired.
"We have to find Zita!"
"why's that again?"
"Pete Tong just visited me in my sleep, he told me that now he's dead he can contact any one of us while we are unconciouis! He told me that in order to get to the bottom of the presidents death we must first meet up with Zita!"
The room went silent. Each member of the posse was staring blankly at Tarrant.
"Pete Tong told me you wouldn't believe me!" Tarrant said.
"We just saw Pete Tong the other morning Tarrant! He's not dead." YH explained to Tarrant, whilst checking the side of Tarrants pills container.
Tarrant rushed over to the T.V set tripping over Saesee's legs as he went. He turned the T.V on and flicked through to BBC news 24. The group stared open mouthed at what was being broadcast.
"today saw the death of another dwindling celebrity, Pete Tong, ex DJ, was found this morning, murdered, at the Self drive garage he had bought and now worked in." came the low quality report we've come to expect from the BBC.
"See! It's all true!" declared Tarrant.
The others nodded their agreement, only YH could muster the power of speech.
"Guys, I think its time to call Zita!"
------------ --------------- -----------
With Eduardo back safe and sound and Pete Tong by their side as a mentor from beyond the grave, the group were quickly becoming powerful. Before long the whole world would be there oyster!
Of course none of these facts had escaped Grix. If he was to stop them he must act quickly and he already had a number of things working in his favour. Firstly the group were currently without Ant. Wookie had scared Ant so bad that his head was elsewere, if Grix could get to him first he could be very useful indeed. But on the other hand, if Grix could silence Zita before the group had time t speak to her, that could prove more valuable than having Ant on side.
He was going to have to send Wookie out soon and he only realisticly had time to send him in one direction.
But who was it to be?
Zita or Ant?
"I've got it!" he exclaimed.
"Got what?" M16 inquired.
"We have to find Zita!"
"why's that again?"
"Pete Tong just visited me in my sleep, he told me that now he's dead he can contact any one of us while we are unconciouis! He told me that in order to get to the bottom of the presidents death we must first meet up with Zita!"
The room went silent. Each member of the posse was staring blankly at Tarrant.
"Pete Tong told me you wouldn't believe me!" Tarrant said.
"We just saw Pete Tong the other morning Tarrant! He's not dead." YH explained to Tarrant, whilst checking the side of Tarrants pills container.
Tarrant rushed over to the T.V set tripping over Saesee's legs as he went. He turned the T.V on and flicked through to BBC news 24. The group stared open mouthed at what was being broadcast.
"today saw the death of another dwindling celebrity, Pete Tong, ex DJ, was found this morning, murdered, at the Self drive garage he had bought and now worked in." came the low quality report we've come to expect from the BBC.
"See! It's all true!" declared Tarrant.
The others nodded their agreement, only YH could muster the power of speech.
"Guys, I think its time to call Zita!"
------------ --------------- -----------
With Eduardo back safe and sound and Pete Tong by their side as a mentor from beyond the grave, the group were quickly becoming powerful. Before long the whole world would be there oyster!
Of course none of these facts had escaped Grix. If he was to stop them he must act quickly and he already had a number of things working in his favour. Firstly the group were currently without Ant. Wookie had scared Ant so bad that his head was elsewere, if Grix could get to him first he could be very useful indeed. But on the other hand, if Grix could silence Zita before the group had time t speak to her, that could prove more valuable than having Ant on side.
He was going to have to send Wookie out soon and he only realisticly had time to send him in one direction.
But who was it to be?
Zita or Ant?
As Ant appraoched the old man, one of the ducks purposefully strolled over to Ant.
Ant quickly tried to strike the dangerous duck, but the duck dodged Ant's strike, hopping to the side as the kitchen knife whistled through the air.
Ant recovered quickly, backing away from the duck, who had now successfully loaded its bill and was getting ready to fire.
Quite suddenly, the man on the bench called out, distracting the duck so it's shot flew past Ant, catching his ear as it went by.
Ant recovered quickly, and ran off, leaving the man chuckling to himself on the bench....
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tarrant and YH arrived back at YH's house, which was not small at all, its just it was spaciously restricted, a blatant difference.
Everyone was still there, but thy were looking slightly guilty.
"Whats going on? Why do you all look so guilty?" Asked YH.
"I knew it!" Screamed Tarrant, "TW, you're a bad guy!"
"Excuse him please, he's lost his tablets, anyone seen them?" Interrupted YH, "Ahhh, thanks, here Tarrant, take one of these, then go and have a lie down"
Tarrant took one of the pills, visibly relaxed, and then collapsed on he floor.
"Right, sorry about that TW, he just hadnt had his Rat's Poop Pills for a couple of hours, you know how he gets...."
"Look, YH, we're really sorry, I feel we may have made A Bad Move." Said TW.
"That record came on the radio, that Little Bow Wow one? And HE turned the volume up, now all your neighbours think you really like the song, sorry mate."
YH started to get really angry, he hated that bloody song! Now his friends will think he likes it, how could this lot do it to him? Well, he'd only known them a few days, but still, everyone hated it. Didnt they?
YH was about to have words, when suddenly.........
Ant quickly tried to strike the dangerous duck, but the duck dodged Ant's strike, hopping to the side as the kitchen knife whistled through the air.
Ant recovered quickly, backing away from the duck, who had now successfully loaded its bill and was getting ready to fire.
Quite suddenly, the man on the bench called out, distracting the duck so it's shot flew past Ant, catching his ear as it went by.
Ant recovered quickly, and ran off, leaving the man chuckling to himself on the bench....
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tarrant and YH arrived back at YH's house, which was not small at all, its just it was spaciously restricted, a blatant difference.
Everyone was still there, but thy were looking slightly guilty.
"Whats going on? Why do you all look so guilty?" Asked YH.
"I knew it!" Screamed Tarrant, "TW, you're a bad guy!"
"Excuse him please, he's lost his tablets, anyone seen them?" Interrupted YH, "Ahhh, thanks, here Tarrant, take one of these, then go and have a lie down"
Tarrant took one of the pills, visibly relaxed, and then collapsed on he floor.
"Right, sorry about that TW, he just hadnt had his Rat's Poop Pills for a couple of hours, you know how he gets...."
"Look, YH, we're really sorry, I feel we may have made A Bad Move." Said TW.
"That record came on the radio, that Little Bow Wow one? And HE turned the volume up, now all your neighbours think you really like the song, sorry mate."
YH started to get really angry, he hated that bloody song! Now his friends will think he likes it, how could this lot do it to him? Well, he'd only known them a few days, but still, everyone hated it. Didnt they?
YH was about to have words, when suddenly.........
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