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"Joke departement"

Now before you start i know this topic has been done before but Kernals one was not a competition unlike this one which is. I will choose the best joke when i feel like it.
At the moment this one is winning:

There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all sitting around a table talking about their sons.
"My son was born on St Georges day," stated the Englishman,"so we obviously decided to call him George."
"What a coincedence," said the scot,"my son was born on St Patrick's day so we called him Patrick."
"That's incredible," the Irishman remarked,"exactly the same thing happened with my son Pancake."

How did Pikatue get on the bus?

Pokemon'

Never ask a Scotish bar man for a large coke.

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar?

Ow.

Funny, but I still have the golden banana.

There was an english man, an irish man and a scottish man on a plane, the plane is about to crash. There were only 2 parachutes left, so the scottish man put one on and the irish man out one on.
"What am I supposed to do?" said the english man
"Put some butter on your a$$ and slide down the rainbow.

This man was in a bar, he said to the barman "How much do you want a bet that I can pi$$ in this pint glass and not spill a drip"
The barman laughed and delightedley said " I bet you £100"
"O.k then" the man said.
He walked over to 2 men playing pool and whispered something in their ears, the 2 men laughed and shook his hand.
The man came back, unzipped his trousers and pi$$ed all over the barman and all over the bar.
The barman said "Where is my £100 then?"
The man walked over to the men playing pool, got given £200 and comes back to the bar.
"What was that about?" said the barman
"I had a bet with them that I could pi$$ all over you, all over the bar and you would still be smiling".

*Steals Banana Award*

It's obvious; always listen to gypsies.

if El Pinko can tell me whats funny about it i will consider giving it to him..

sorry EL Pinko but CGJ still has the golden bannana,your going to have to try a little harder to get it.....

Haha?

Once there was a man, called Ted, ted wanted to be rich, and one day he desided to visit a gypsie. The gypsie promised him fortune in the form of a house brick. "This brick" she said (notice the quotations, I've gone all out on this one) "is a magical brick, it bounces". Ted took the brick, dropped it on the floor, it bounced back up. He was amazed, this felt like, looked like, a normal house brick. He did it again, again it bounced. "thanks he said" skipping out away, "there is just one thing" the gypsie said, "you must never EVER bounce the brick as hard as you can"
"ok" said ted, running off with his brick. He bounced the brick in pubs, eventually word travelled, he was on the news, he was on TV, he tour-ed with the brick, it brought him fame, stardom and millions of pounds. One day Ted was in a feild and he decided to bounce the brick as hard as he could, he threw it at the ground, it bounced up and, went through the clouds and never returned.