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"Simpsons Quotes"

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Tue 17/06/03 at 01:39
Regular
Posts: 787
I know this has been done before, but I sometimes crack up at work when I remember some of the quotes from this great tv show, and wanted to see if there's any I missed.

lets get the ball rolling :

Marge : "Homer, are illegally producing alcohol in our basement and selling it to local watering holes??"
Homer : "I'm not gonna lie to you marge ........ well, see you later"
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Tue 17/06/03 at 15:52
Regular
"Puerile Shagging"
Posts: 15,009
Comic book guy: hello, I would like to return this utility belt.

Some store guy: do you have a receipt?

Comic book guy: No, I won it at a Star Trek convention although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no need for an average sized belt.

Some store guy: wooow-wooow, a fat sarcastic Star Trek fan, you must be a devil with the ladies.

Comic book guy: Oh, peh hurh.

Some store guy: sorry buddy but, no receipt no return.

Bart buys it and comic book guy says: Huh! Very well, no I must return to my comic book store where I dispense the insults rather then absorb them.
Tue 17/06/03 at 15:46
Regular
"No Surprises Please"
Posts: 2,192
Homer reads sign on thermastat

Homer: Do not touch, Willy... hmmm, good advice.

--

Skinner: That's it, I'm out of here.

Moe: Not before me you ain't!

Flanders: C'mon on now, there's enough exits for everyone.

Moe: That's it, I've had enough of you! *punches him in the stomach*

--

Moe: I reckon we skin him alive and burn his flesh!

Skinner: Yes, that'll show God that we're on his side.

Moe: Show who the what now?

--

Homer: Ahhh alcohol, the cause and solution to all lifes problems.
Tue 17/06/03 at 15:36
Regular
"Hellfire Stoker"
Posts: 10,534
Antiques expert: "A bar tab over 100 years old, never cleaned, probably worth about $100,000- hold on, someone's scratched in 'Homer rules' on it. Net value- ten cents."
Homer (at home, drunk): "He sure does!"
Moe: "I'll kill him!" Grabs a blunderbass from Principal Skinner, which promptly crumbles.
Tue 17/06/03 at 13:27
Regular
"Brooklyn boy"
Posts: 14,935
Kent Brockman - And how are the children Arnie
Arnie Pie In The Sky - I can't see through metal Kent.

or

Comic Book Guy - I'll return to my store where i dispense the insults rather than take them.
Tue 17/06/03 at 12:43
Regular
"Selected"
Posts: 4,199
Kent Brockman: "The wave of towel snapping is expected to get worse before it gets better"
Tue 17/06/03 at 12:29
Regular
"Hallelujah"
Posts: 2,731
"The miss springfield has been disqualified, an error was made in her form by Mr Simpson her father, in the box the said 'Do not write in this box' he wrote 'OK'"
Tue 17/06/03 at 11:35
Regular
"Hellfire Stoker"
Posts: 10,534
Kent Brockman: "This week saw the opening of the world's first two storey outhouse, in Springfield..."

Man on bottom floor: "Aaaargh! No! Stop That! Aaaargh!"

or

Willie: "I 'ate your dog, I 'ate 'is guts, I 'ate 'is eyes and 'ated all of him- so I gave 'im to the church."

"And 'is little accidents- I 'ate them as well!"
Tue 17/06/03 at 11:01
Regular
Posts: 16,548
"UP AND ATOM!"
"UP AND AT THEM!"
"UP AND ATOOOM!"
"UP AND AT THEM!!!!"
"Sigh...better."
Tue 17/06/03 at 10:54
Regular
"TheShiznit.co.uk"
Posts: 6,592
"Oh no, the corn! Paul Newman's gonna have mah legs broke."
Tue 17/06/03 at 10:49
Regular
"Hallelujah"
Posts: 2,731
"When i was seventeen, i drank some very good beer, i drank some very good beer that i purchased with a fake ID, my name was Brian Mgee, i stayed up listning to queen, when i was seventeen"
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