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lets get the ball rolling :
Marge : "Homer, are illegally producing alcohol in our basement and selling it to local watering holes??"
Homer : "I'm not gonna lie to you marge ........ well, see you later"
Some store guy: do you have a receipt?
Comic book guy: No, I won it at a Star Trek convention although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no need for an average sized belt.
Some store guy: wooow-wooow, a fat sarcastic Star Trek fan, you must be a devil with the ladies.
Comic book guy: Oh, peh hurh.
Some store guy: sorry buddy but, no receipt no return.
Bart buys it and comic book guy says: Huh! Very well, no I must return to my comic book store where I dispense the insults rather then absorb them.
Homer: Do not touch, Willy... hmmm, good advice.
--
Skinner: That's it, I'm out of here.
Moe: Not before me you ain't!
Flanders: C'mon on now, there's enough exits for everyone.
Moe: That's it, I've had enough of you! *punches him in the stomach*
--
Moe: I reckon we skin him alive and burn his flesh!
Skinner: Yes, that'll show God that we're on his side.
Moe: Show who the what now?
--
Homer: Ahhh alcohol, the cause and solution to all lifes problems.
Homer (at home, drunk): "He sure does!"
Moe: "I'll kill him!" Grabs a blunderbass from Principal Skinner, which promptly crumbles.
Arnie Pie In The Sky - I can't see through metal Kent.
or
Comic Book Guy - I'll return to my store where i dispense the insults rather than take them.
Man on bottom floor: "Aaaargh! No! Stop That! Aaaargh!"
or
Willie: "I 'ate your dog, I 'ate 'is guts, I 'ate 'is eyes and 'ated all of him- so I gave 'im to the church."
"And 'is little accidents- I 'ate them as well!"
"UP AND AT THEM!"
"UP AND ATOOOM!"
"UP AND AT THEM!!!!"
"Sigh...better."