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"Massive fight last night"

I am in such a bad way. I had a massive fight with my girlfriend last night. We have been together for over a year and I love her dearly, but last night we had the worst fight ever. We were even physical with each other and I would never usually hit a woman. In the end I told her I wanted her to be out of my house tomorrow - because she lives with me. I slept in another room last night and this morning we didn't say a word to each other. We dodged each other round the house and went to work our seperate ways.

I dont know what to say to her when/if I see her when I get back from work. Deep down I dont want her to go as I love her and we have fun together, but we have been arguing loads and I have been finding myself looking at other women, thinking "she looks nice". I'm sure she doesn't want to leave either, but I am really stuborn and dont think I can say sorry to her.

Please help me.....

Mr Ripper wrote:
> what? Nooo! the fence is sleeping with the next door neighbours garage
> door? controversial!

Yay, I think we broke him!

Explode much

Mr Ripper wrote:
> A pencil can kill. Women weigh much, much more, and can actually move.
> They are far from defenceless.

Heh heh. Fantastic. And to think someone had the temerity to label your arguments puerile. What were they thinking...?

*shakes head*

Mystique wrote:
> Its stupid that you're sticking around if your other half keeps on
> hitting you.

the only reply this deserves is

READ THE F***ING THREAD, THEN COMMENT.

ONE TIME MY GIRLFRIEND HAS STRUCK OUT, ONE TIME I DEFENDED MYSELF NOT BY HITTING HER, BUT BY RESTRAINING HER.

I HAVE NEVER HIT A WOMAN, AND HAVE NEVER BEEN CONTINUALLY PHYSICALLY ABUSED BY ONE.

I'M STICKING IN A RELATIONSHIP WHERE THERE WAS ONE BIG MISTAKE BECAUSE I KNOW IT WAS JUST A MISTAKE, AND IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN, AND IF IT DOES, THEN I'LL DEAL WITH IT IN MY OWN WAY.



hello wall. How are you today?

Good, good. Not bad, a little stressed recently, but these things come and go don't they?

what? Nooo! the fence is sleeping with the next door neighbours garage door? controversial!

"What YOU seem to be saying is that it is OK for women to hit men. And let them keep on hitting you. Now THAT is stupid."
******

Its stupid that you're sticking around if your other half keeps on hitting you.

Mr. Happy wrote:
> No, Mr. Ripper, all you are doing is making an utterly moronic
> statement or four, and then defending the more sensible points. You
> have said that it is sexist to say that men should not be able to hit
> women. Which is stupid.

Why?

> You have said "If you hurt me you only
> hurt yourself", which is equally indefensible.

Why?

What YOU seem to be saying is that it is OK for women to hit men. And let them keep on hitting you. Now THAT is stupid. Take for example the movie Romeo Must Die. Jet Li encounters a well trained Kung Fu biker, with helmet on, biker intends to kill Jet Li. Jet Li is all up for kicking biker's behind, but then biker takes off helmet, and is a woman! Suddenly, Jet refuses to hit her, and has to do a contorted performance slinging Aaliyah's body at her instead of hitting her himself.

Is that sensible? This woman is easilly capable of killing people, and clearly intends to kill you, and yet you will not defend yourself properly.

That isn't just stupid, it's a potentially lethal error. It is perfectly defensible to defend yourself, and retorting with "most girls aren't capable of hurting a bloke" is just ignorance. A stray headbutt can kill, as can fingernail. Refusing to defend yourself against someone just because they are weaker than you is morornic.

A pencil can kill. Women weigh much, much more, and can actually move. They are far from defenceless.

As for the "hurting me hurts you" comment, I got a fat lip, a bloody ear, etc etc. In return, my girlfriend got a bruise where I restrained her. Now she has a visible reminder that I'm not a punch bag. She knows also that I didn't hit her though I could have, and to be honest, any women who hits a bloke and gets off scot free will only hit another bloke.


Also, imagine for some reason, some bloke hits you. This bloke is almost incredibly weak. yet he is determined to do you harm. Do you think, this guy is too weak to bother with, or do you teach him a lesson in manners. Throw him down, knock him down, or otherwise deck him? Don't give me crap here, because most guys will just deck him. Yet he is weaker, is he not? Surely it's just like hitting a girl?

Ambiguity. The "women are weak" is not an excuse, since people attack other things weaker than them as a matter of course. It's just sexism.

Yep.

I take issue with Ripper's continual refusal to even entertain an opposing viewpoint. As soon as that happens, you become aggressive and sneering, casting "weak" and "coward" at people.

The actions of someone that is unable to articulate or defend the more questionable points made and refuses to do anything other than "I know I am but what are you".

That's why I'm arguing with you.
And still trying to work out your "Hurting me only hurts you" comment as well as the points Mr Happy has raised.

Violence is not, whether from males or females, any answer to any situation. It marks that person out as a mindless incompetent that is unable to express themselves through any other action other than violence.

There is no call for it.
And it is indefensible, especially in a relationship between two people which is supposed to be about understanding, compassion, love and support.
I fail to see how walloping someone falls into that criteria.

And to say "Have you ever considered that you said something to make the hit you" is purile at best.
"You see what you made me do? You deserved that" is the argument of a bully.
As is becoming overly aggressive whenever someone disagrees with your viewpoints.

Throughout this thread, I made it abundantly clear that my views on spousal abuse were purely my own, relating to me.
Until you, Ripper, started to label and criticise me.
Only then have I applied my values to you and your situation.

But you are unwilling to extend me the same courtesy, all the time posturing about being too superior to reply and wishing to place me on ignore.
Yet you do respond, time and time again. And consistently fail to answer the points raised in some of your comments.

Which is fair enough, but nobody started attacking you until you went on your usual offensive against anyone that dares to question the almighty word of Mr Ripper.

Well I do question it, because I find you to be an overbearing bullying loudmouth.
But that's just my opinion at the end of the day and feel free to ignore me.

That is why people are arguing with you.

No, Mr. Ripper, all you are doing is making an utterly moronic statement or four, and then defending the more sensible points. You have said that it is sexist to say that men should not be able to hit women. Which is stupid. You have said "If you hurt me you only hurt yourself", which is equally indefensible.

you're talking to a brick wall honey.

As far as they're concerned, what's "wrong" is trying to sort out your problems, and instead, you should run away from problems post haste.

I may once have been considered a troll on these forums, but the only troll I see here is Goatboy.

How the mighty have fallen.