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"Ridding the world of evil"

A Sunday afternoon spent waiting in a computer store for the simian to work the till out.
And me and my mate spent the drive home ranting about how most people shouldn’t be allowed out and we came to the following conclusions:
As a scientist, he will forgo his endless quest for superpowers by mixing chemicals and falling into vats of bubbling stuff and now intends to create a formula that will eliminate stupid people.
You have nothing to fear unless you fall into the following categories:

You migrate to DIY stores for “things for the house” on a Sunday, and spend 20 minutes looking at curtain rods going “ooh nice”

You name your house, despite living on an estate somewhere you still put a plaque up that says “Little Cottage” and insist your mail is addressed just so.

You put neo-classical roman columns outside your semi-detached house with a name

You have stained glass windows, those little round ones with a bird in the middle.

You drive a Fiesta/Uno/Nova and think by removing the name badge, blacking the windows out and having neon on it, you are cool and sexy.

You listen to those in-car CDs that only seem to have buzzing bass and 180bpm drum machines on, and you leave the door open whilst you stand with your chimp mates in a car-park of a fast food restaurant.

You have a squat dangerous dog called “Savage” or “Vinnie Jones” that you let wobble out your estate after dark, then spend 20 mins standing on your doorstep at 11pm shouting it’s name and kicking it when it runs past you with a limb in it’s mouth.

Your idea of eating out is going to a place where they have pictures of the food on the menu and it’s coated in easy-wipe plastic.
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There are more categories, but I forgot them already.

I dont do baking. And Im not lonely & desperate, you really shouldnt reveal your feelings like that, then try to put them on someone else.

And 'paddock'?????? Fancy yourself as a bit of a stallion, do you? Heehee.

Look ladies.........

I know you have had your entertainment for today, finding one of your own secretly on the forum, but seriously, back to the dishes, please..........

The male mind works thus:

The world is collapsing, fires rage and disease is rife.
A man stops and starts laughing to himself because the mushroom cloud heralding the end of life as we know it looked a bit like a boob.

That's the thing Goaty, you can sniff them out much better than anyone else, but when it comes to the chase, those little Goat legs just don't have the running in them that you used to when you were a Kid..........

Don't make him mad you don't want him to "smash yoo wiv his stick" do you?

Meka Dragon wrote:
> Tallulah wrote:

Btw, you lot, did you notice that he called you all neophyte
> muppets?
> Thats not a very nice thing to say.

It's a sign of
> affection.

You really DON'T understand men, do you?

No, I really am not familiar with the workings of the male mind, which is actually a blessing.

Tallulah wrote:

Fine, I'll go. Adieu.
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Nononononono, it's er...nice to have the waft of baking and washing up in here.
Stay and tell me how great I am some more.

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

I start by insulting here, gradually winning her over to my paddock and now you all want some?

How dare you!
She's mine I tells ya,find your own lonely desperate woman.

Goatboy wrote:
> Oi!
This was a harmonious den of man before you entered and started pitting us
> against each other.

Fine, I'll go. Adieu.

There's nothing wrong with a bit of Tarzan shouting and beating bare chest to make the day go by, lets just hope the women join in.........