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Sniper lay on the medic table, that Grix lay on oh so long ago... just before they all entered his mind, and entered a world of the west, fought like cowboys and swore like Scotsmen.
Sniper, was in what seemed a coma... mind you, he didn't actually have a mind, as it had been removed...
Oh right, you don't know about any of this crap... better update you then.
A week ago, Sniper's and Bill Gate's mind were both put onto a megadrive cartridge after they failed to save him. Soon after that, Grix died, so they put his mind on it too. So he's kinda alive, but not.
Hmmm.
Let's start again.
Sniper's mind is now on the megadrive cartridge along with Bill Gate's mind and Grix's. We don't know why.
But, Sniper's mind for some reason has taken control, and now has created a world for which the minds to live in. A bit like the Matrix, but not.
For you see, it's Sniper's mind that creates the world... much like Grix's mind made the western world, that they all got stuck in.
Hmmm...
Did you ever see that episode of Red Dwarf when Kryten got that bug, and in order to fight it, he made a computer program that he fought in with his mind? Gunmen of the Apocolypse, right?
Well, it's like that.
-------------
"Would anyone be utterly shocked if we entered this thing and it was just a barren wasteland?" Pb asked.
"Now now, they'll be room for plenty of empty minded Sniper jokes later. Let's not ruin them all now." FM replied.
They had chosen the original four to go back inside the Megadrive cartridge, for obvious reasons. Being "more deserving to be wrote about" seemed to be top reason.
So Venombyte, Pb, Meka and FantasyMeister all decided that they would enter, Goatboy then managed to convince them that he should go too. Rock and roll, apparently.
So it was decided. The rest just lay around, and waited. And so they entered Sniper's mind.
----------------
Tuesday. Just a name for another day.
Sniper doodled a naked woman in his diary... completely out of proportion, dreamy.
He had been stuck inside all day, waiting... just like any other damn day. He wore a black and white suit, and waited in his black and white room... he looked out into the white sky, with black clouds and black rain. It was if the whole damn world was black and white.
He dreamed of a rainbow, but he couldn't remember what it looked like.
Hell, he couldn't even remember what his face looked like. He got up from his desk, and walked to the mirror.
A damn handsome man starred back at him... just as he thought, he was beautiful. How could he forget.
He went back to his desk, and began to clear away his things. Pointless staying in the office all day... damn, he needed to get out... and of course, his award ceremony tonight, dedicated to him... was supposed to be a surprise, but how do you hide something from Sniper?
He smiled to himself. He rocked.
A knock came at the black and white door of his colourless room... as it opened, the name of the occupant and his job description flew also, along with a beautiful woman in a red dress.
"Detective Sniper? Is that you?"
Sniper turned fully around, and brushed his hair back with his fingers.
"Hi there sugarcake. What can I do for you?"
The woman seemed flustered, embarressed.
"To be honest, I'm... I didn't expect you to look... so..."
"Handsome? Don't worry darling, the words will come, but let us forget communication for the time being, and let's get down to business..."
"No... I... but..." The woman resisted, still clinging to the handle of the door. "I need your help, I'm worried... I think there is someone trying to kill me."
Sniper took the words like the smoke from his cigarette, calmly destroying his insides while seeming so good. "I'm intrigued, why would anyone want to kill you?"
"I don't know..." The woman obviously lied. "I just... you have to protect me. It's Grix Thraves, I think he's stalking me."
Grix... the name made his tongue sting every time he uttered the word... speaking out to him like a lemon juice without any added sugar.
"Grix..." He said, wiping his tongue with his teeth. "Him."
"Yeah... he's after me Sniper, I feel him everywhere I go..."
Sniper's thoughts disgusted him. "Damn him. Don't worry darling, I'll get him, don't you worry about it."
"Thank you, please, I have something to tell you..." The woman left the door, and approuched Sniper... she leaned in towards him...
Sniper smiled and looked deep into her eyes...
"You can find him usually in the arms of a lady in the Queen's Arms at 9:00PM every night."
"The Queen's Arms? But that's a gay bar." Sniper said, thoughtful.
"How do you know that?"
Sniper looked around. "I'm a private detective sugarcup, I have to know these things." Sniper smoothed back his hair again.
"Please, Sniper, make love to me, now, please!" The woman fell to her knees.
"Not now darling, my clan awaits me... tonight we're playing Unreal Tournament." He paused. "It's been a while. A long while." Sniper left the room, and the woman cried in her arms.
Sniper, was in what seemed a coma... mind you, he didn't actually have a mind, as it had been removed...
Oh right, you don't know about any of this crap... better update you then.
A week ago, Sniper's and Bill Gate's mind were both put onto a megadrive cartridge after they failed to save him. Soon after that, Grix died, so they put his mind on it too. So he's kinda alive, but not.
Hmmm.
Let's start again.
Sniper's mind is now on the megadrive cartridge along with Bill Gate's mind and Grix's. We don't know why.
But, Sniper's mind for some reason has taken control, and now has created a world for which the minds to live in. A bit like the Matrix, but not.
For you see, it's Sniper's mind that creates the world... much like Grix's mind made the western world, that they all got stuck in.
Hmmm...
Did you ever see that episode of Red Dwarf when Kryten got that bug, and in order to fight it, he made a computer program that he fought in with his mind? Gunmen of the Apocolypse, right?
Well, it's like that.
-------------
"Would anyone be utterly shocked if we entered this thing and it was just a barren wasteland?" Pb asked.
"Now now, they'll be room for plenty of empty minded Sniper jokes later. Let's not ruin them all now." FM replied.
They had chosen the original four to go back inside the Megadrive cartridge, for obvious reasons. Being "more deserving to be wrote about" seemed to be top reason.
So Venombyte, Pb, Meka and FantasyMeister all decided that they would enter, Goatboy then managed to convince them that he should go too. Rock and roll, apparently.
So it was decided. The rest just lay around, and waited. And so they entered Sniper's mind.
----------------
Tuesday. Just a name for another day.
Sniper doodled a naked woman in his diary... completely out of proportion, dreamy.
He had been stuck inside all day, waiting... just like any other damn day. He wore a black and white suit, and waited in his black and white room... he looked out into the white sky, with black clouds and black rain. It was if the whole damn world was black and white.
He dreamed of a rainbow, but he couldn't remember what it looked like.
Hell, he couldn't even remember what his face looked like. He got up from his desk, and walked to the mirror.
A damn handsome man starred back at him... just as he thought, he was beautiful. How could he forget.
He went back to his desk, and began to clear away his things. Pointless staying in the office all day... damn, he needed to get out... and of course, his award ceremony tonight, dedicated to him... was supposed to be a surprise, but how do you hide something from Sniper?
He smiled to himself. He rocked.
A knock came at the black and white door of his colourless room... as it opened, the name of the occupant and his job description flew also, along with a beautiful woman in a red dress.
"Detective Sniper? Is that you?"
Sniper turned fully around, and brushed his hair back with his fingers.
"Hi there sugarcake. What can I do for you?"
The woman seemed flustered, embarressed.
"To be honest, I'm... I didn't expect you to look... so..."
"Handsome? Don't worry darling, the words will come, but let us forget communication for the time being, and let's get down to business..."
"No... I... but..." The woman resisted, still clinging to the handle of the door. "I need your help, I'm worried... I think there is someone trying to kill me."
Sniper took the words like the smoke from his cigarette, calmly destroying his insides while seeming so good. "I'm intrigued, why would anyone want to kill you?"
"I don't know..." The woman obviously lied. "I just... you have to protect me. It's Grix Thraves, I think he's stalking me."
Grix... the name made his tongue sting every time he uttered the word... speaking out to him like a lemon juice without any added sugar.
"Grix..." He said, wiping his tongue with his teeth. "Him."
"Yeah... he's after me Sniper, I feel him everywhere I go..."
Sniper's thoughts disgusted him. "Damn him. Don't worry darling, I'll get him, don't you worry about it."
"Thank you, please, I have something to tell you..." The woman left the door, and approuched Sniper... she leaned in towards him...
Sniper smiled and looked deep into her eyes...
"You can find him usually in the arms of a lady in the Queen's Arms at 9:00PM every night."
"The Queen's Arms? But that's a gay bar." Sniper said, thoughtful.
"How do you know that?"
Sniper looked around. "I'm a private detective sugarcup, I have to know these things." Sniper smoothed back his hair again.
"Please, Sniper, make love to me, now, please!" The woman fell to her knees.
"Not now darling, my clan awaits me... tonight we're playing Unreal Tournament." He paused. "It's been a while. A long while." Sniper left the room, and the woman cried in her arms.
Page:
"Oh good God..." Ant said to himself. "The story is taking itself too seriously again."
"Grix... he'll kill them all with his serious plot lines and strange ability to write all of the time."
"There's only one thing for it..." Ant said. He had waited long enough, nothing was working, what left was there to do?
Ant bought out a locked briefcase... and an envelope. On the the envelope was a strict warning, never EVER open unless it meant life or death.
Well, the story was dying... and it wasn't as if it was going to resurrect itself.
Ant opened the letter, and bought out a small piece of paper. Four numbers were on it.
He changed the locks on the briefcase to the numbers on the piece of paper.
Strafex walked through the door... "ANT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!"
"It's too late! We haven't got a hope!"
"But Ant... it's too easy! It's far too easy!"
"No Strafex, it's too hard. That's why we fail."
"No..." Strafex fell to his knees... "No..."
"You're better then?"
"Evidently."
"Weren't you kidnapped?"
"I don't think anyone noticed."
Strafex watched on as Ant *clicked* the briefcase open.
And there it was.
The Star Wars Trilogy, on VHS.
"Good luck, Ant."
"Thanks." He took out A New Hope, and placed it in the VCR.
"All we can do now is pray."
"Grix... he'll kill them all with his serious plot lines and strange ability to write all of the time."
"There's only one thing for it..." Ant said. He had waited long enough, nothing was working, what left was there to do?
Ant bought out a locked briefcase... and an envelope. On the the envelope was a strict warning, never EVER open unless it meant life or death.
Well, the story was dying... and it wasn't as if it was going to resurrect itself.
Ant opened the letter, and bought out a small piece of paper. Four numbers were on it.
He changed the locks on the briefcase to the numbers on the piece of paper.
Strafex walked through the door... "ANT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!"
"It's too late! We haven't got a hope!"
"But Ant... it's too easy! It's far too easy!"
"No Strafex, it's too hard. That's why we fail."
"No..." Strafex fell to his knees... "No..."
"You're better then?"
"Evidently."
"Weren't you kidnapped?"
"I don't think anyone noticed."
Strafex watched on as Ant *clicked* the briefcase open.
And there it was.
The Star Wars Trilogy, on VHS.
"Good luck, Ant."
"Thanks." He took out A New Hope, and placed it in the VCR.
"All we can do now is pray."
What, perhaps, are we trying to achieve in life?
The same thing that we achieve when we set out to purchase groceries, when we ring a friend to tell them of news... we set ourselves tasks, and we try to complete them.
There are those, however, that see achievement as something else entirely.
---------------
"That's it?"
"No, I thought you just might like to look at it."
"Oh."
Sarcasm never really worked on Grix. "Yeah. That's it."
Grix looked up the hill, stretching far into the clouds... "He lives well."
"Very well. Why shouldn't he?" His brain asked him, almost with a hint of doubt in his voice.
A winding path led to the dark figure of a home which lay quite isolated from any other of it's kind... gates open, gates close, everything seemed to be going well.
"He knows you then, this person?"
"Yeah, he knows me. And I've told you, he's Sniper's brain, not a person."
"But he's human?"
"In human form, yes, but he exists only as thoughts and dreams... the same as me. I cannot really live, because I can't say I've ever been born."
Bushes and trees walled the path to it's destination, the roundabout of majesty which lay beneath the feet of the medieval home that sway among the stars. Towers poking from the building like stakes in the land, pushing their way to the heavens.
Grix's brain stopped the car on the edge of the roundabout, and the two men exited to nothingness... Grix could hear nothing, the wind blew in his face, but not a single sound otherwise would prove so.
A small leaf from a tree blew silently across the tarmac, finishing in a relaxed position at the view of the front door. Grix and his brain walked and stood before the door.
How on earth could someone make a dignified entrance in a place like this...? The home was like a city, spreading out on either side, overwhelming any sort of perspective anyone could ever possibly hope for.
And so the door is knocked upon.
The knocks echo across the hill... seemingly bouncing between the hill and the very tip of the sky, almost as if you had to duck to move around.
The door opened.
"Good evening, dear sirs. I have been expecting you."
"Thank you." Grix's brain acknowledged his companion and alike, and walked in. Grix followed, attempting politeness.
If the walls were a city, then these were the roads of such... the stairway twisted up into darkness, shining lights dimly focusing on paintings and rugs which laden the old wooden floor, dust agitated by the presence of something which was obviously quite rare.
"You live alone?" Grix asked.
"I live here with no companions, that is true... but I wouldn't say I have ever felt alone." Sniper's brain never looked up, towards anything but only what he saw himself, speaking as if only he was there to listen.
A long grey matted nightgown led the way for Grix and his mind to follow, towards the end of these roads, the heart of the city.
It wasn't even told that they had reached their destination, but the sheer freedom of thought that was inspired by the far-stretched room cleared any doubt from the soul, and settled your mind for the simple and comfortable surroundings. Infinite bookcases shooting down the left and right, perspective confusing shelves that made you feel that you could touch both sides of the room at once...
The lights from a chandelier boasted the four corners of the room, colouring the bookcase like nothing before seen.
"I like to read." Sniper's brain mumbled.
"What are they?" Grix's brain returned.
Sniper's brain stopped in the centre of the room, almost pitying himself, making peace.
"They are the world itself." He finally replied.
He sat down, pulling his night-gown close, and quietly gestured for the visitors to sit.
"You understand why we are here." Grix's brain said.
"Yes, I do." Came the answer, almost afraid to admit.
"This world, the whole towns, cities... the way of life, and life itself. None of it exists. An illusion of meaning. We want out."
Grix wasn't really listening, just gazing dreamfully at the millions of old hardback books which lined the walls.
"I'm afraid I can't allow that."
Grix switched on. "What, why?"
Grix's brain smiled... it seems as Grix was actually bothered about getting out now.
Sniper's brain stayed remarkably quiet against the fact that he had just been asked a question. He simply stood up, and admired the books.
"Why don't you read one?" He said, finally.
Grix got up. Choosing quickly, he removed a tatty blue book from the shelf, dusted the spine... and opened it to roughly the centre of the book.
He read the first line of the page... it was like a diary... and had some day in January written on it.
"MJSwerve decides to go bowling on Fridays, after partying with friends."
Grix's brain suddenly perked up. Grix couldn't make sense of it.
He turned to another page. It had today’s date on it.
"Reaper meets his future wife, Iguana, for the first time when she bowls in the lane next to him, and they both introduce each other after noticing that they are using the same bowling balls. 7:43PM."
"What on earth is this?" Grix asked.
"It's exactly what he said it was." Grix's brain replied. "It's the world."
Sniper's brain remained silent.
Grix looked at the title page... "Dringo's Bowling... this... is this what happens at Dringo's Bowling? This book is simply a record of what's been going on?"
"No, not a record... a path." Sniper's brain spoke.
He got up, took the book from Grix, and placed it back in the shelf.
"Once upon a time, I tried to contact the other of this body... Sniper. I tried to talk to him, but he simply refused my conversation. It was many years before I finally gave in, and live alone in his mind."
"However, I drove myself insane, by being so lonely. Nothing mattered to me anymore... and with no desire to live, it made living hard, as I could not die."
"Eventually, I tried to create a companion, using the parts of the brain that Sniper would never use... taking power for myself, and using it to create company. It worked, and I managed to provide myself with a person that I could talk to."
"But only then that it dawned on me. Alone in a Godless world, who on earth, or in fact, in Sniper's mind, would want to live in such an awful place? The man I created committed suicide, with nothing left to live for."
"I knew I could make company... but I just needed to work out how the world itself worked... why people gave that hope to live on longer... to keep striding forward. It was the forces of challenge... making everyday different, with the chance to create havoc or peace from your heart within. I made the inhabitants of the world you see before you, as well as the world in which you are in yourself."
Grix breathed, trying to make sense of it all. "So all these books... these are the paths of the people you created?"
"Indeed. I am fate itself."
"Then why, if you are happy with your world you have created, must you permit us from leaving?"
"Because you have changed the balance of the world... the books are rewriting themselves because of your actions. I'm afraid to let you leave, because of the dust that you will leave behind in your place. My world would destroy itself before my eyes."
"But wouldn't it be better to get us out of your way, to stop the books rewriting, and let life try and equal out once more?"
Sniper's brain thought to himself for another moment. "I have studied the way of life for longer than you can imagine... longer than any of you, including Sniper, have lived. I understand the need for balance in civilisation; the ways of God's to keep equilibrium. Push something hard enough in one direction, and it takes the same amount of pushing in the other direction."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Grix asked.
"We can't just walk in and leave." Grix's brain replied. "Would you let us leave if we provided adequate compensation... if we pushed in the other direction for long enough?"
"I shall see. Put forward your proposal, and I'll consider it."
Grix squinted. "It's not about company any more for you... is it? It's power, and greed. You're the God of this world, and you won't give it up for anyone."
"For whom? The man that ignored my pleas for help? The man that simply turned his back on a dying soul? May he stay here for as long as he can. The book is written, and he will live the tale."
"But I thought you said that the books have rewritten themselves... surely they created more books for our presence?" Grix's brain asked...
"They did indeed. But I wrote a small book of my own." Sniper's brain said.
------------------
Grix and his brain stood outside in the silence.
"Explain to me what the hell he meant by that." Grix asked.
"All those books... he wrote them, they govern the ways of which people live. Every little detail. Their illnesses, to what their favourite colour is."
"Yeah, I get that much."
"When we entered, books rewrote themselves, and new books appeared to govern what would happen to us. Sniper's brain had no control over what went into them... right?"
"Ok, so what's this small book of his own?"
"I'm not sure... but I think he's trying to change fate. The only way he could do that would be to write a new book, adding small details in-between things that are destined to happen... it could be anything. If Sniper's favourite food was beefburgers, then he could intoxicate the whole burger supply, with a single line. He can't rewrite any of our books directly, but he can indirectly."
"I'm still confused." Grix said.
"I'm not surprised. Get in the car."
"Where are we going?"
"Dringo's bowling. We're going to try and change fate..." Grix's brain replied... "What's the time?"
Grix rolled up his sleeve, leaning on the car. "About half six."
"We've got an hour. Get in."
The same thing that we achieve when we set out to purchase groceries, when we ring a friend to tell them of news... we set ourselves tasks, and we try to complete them.
There are those, however, that see achievement as something else entirely.
---------------
"That's it?"
"No, I thought you just might like to look at it."
"Oh."
Sarcasm never really worked on Grix. "Yeah. That's it."
Grix looked up the hill, stretching far into the clouds... "He lives well."
"Very well. Why shouldn't he?" His brain asked him, almost with a hint of doubt in his voice.
A winding path led to the dark figure of a home which lay quite isolated from any other of it's kind... gates open, gates close, everything seemed to be going well.
"He knows you then, this person?"
"Yeah, he knows me. And I've told you, he's Sniper's brain, not a person."
"But he's human?"
"In human form, yes, but he exists only as thoughts and dreams... the same as me. I cannot really live, because I can't say I've ever been born."
Bushes and trees walled the path to it's destination, the roundabout of majesty which lay beneath the feet of the medieval home that sway among the stars. Towers poking from the building like stakes in the land, pushing their way to the heavens.
Grix's brain stopped the car on the edge of the roundabout, and the two men exited to nothingness... Grix could hear nothing, the wind blew in his face, but not a single sound otherwise would prove so.
A small leaf from a tree blew silently across the tarmac, finishing in a relaxed position at the view of the front door. Grix and his brain walked and stood before the door.
How on earth could someone make a dignified entrance in a place like this...? The home was like a city, spreading out on either side, overwhelming any sort of perspective anyone could ever possibly hope for.
And so the door is knocked upon.
The knocks echo across the hill... seemingly bouncing between the hill and the very tip of the sky, almost as if you had to duck to move around.
The door opened.
"Good evening, dear sirs. I have been expecting you."
"Thank you." Grix's brain acknowledged his companion and alike, and walked in. Grix followed, attempting politeness.
If the walls were a city, then these were the roads of such... the stairway twisted up into darkness, shining lights dimly focusing on paintings and rugs which laden the old wooden floor, dust agitated by the presence of something which was obviously quite rare.
"You live alone?" Grix asked.
"I live here with no companions, that is true... but I wouldn't say I have ever felt alone." Sniper's brain never looked up, towards anything but only what he saw himself, speaking as if only he was there to listen.
A long grey matted nightgown led the way for Grix and his mind to follow, towards the end of these roads, the heart of the city.
It wasn't even told that they had reached their destination, but the sheer freedom of thought that was inspired by the far-stretched room cleared any doubt from the soul, and settled your mind for the simple and comfortable surroundings. Infinite bookcases shooting down the left and right, perspective confusing shelves that made you feel that you could touch both sides of the room at once...
The lights from a chandelier boasted the four corners of the room, colouring the bookcase like nothing before seen.
"I like to read." Sniper's brain mumbled.
"What are they?" Grix's brain returned.
Sniper's brain stopped in the centre of the room, almost pitying himself, making peace.
"They are the world itself." He finally replied.
He sat down, pulling his night-gown close, and quietly gestured for the visitors to sit.
"You understand why we are here." Grix's brain said.
"Yes, I do." Came the answer, almost afraid to admit.
"This world, the whole towns, cities... the way of life, and life itself. None of it exists. An illusion of meaning. We want out."
Grix wasn't really listening, just gazing dreamfully at the millions of old hardback books which lined the walls.
"I'm afraid I can't allow that."
Grix switched on. "What, why?"
Grix's brain smiled... it seems as Grix was actually bothered about getting out now.
Sniper's brain stayed remarkably quiet against the fact that he had just been asked a question. He simply stood up, and admired the books.
"Why don't you read one?" He said, finally.
Grix got up. Choosing quickly, he removed a tatty blue book from the shelf, dusted the spine... and opened it to roughly the centre of the book.
He read the first line of the page... it was like a diary... and had some day in January written on it.
"MJSwerve decides to go bowling on Fridays, after partying with friends."
Grix's brain suddenly perked up. Grix couldn't make sense of it.
He turned to another page. It had today’s date on it.
"Reaper meets his future wife, Iguana, for the first time when she bowls in the lane next to him, and they both introduce each other after noticing that they are using the same bowling balls. 7:43PM."
"What on earth is this?" Grix asked.
"It's exactly what he said it was." Grix's brain replied. "It's the world."
Sniper's brain remained silent.
Grix looked at the title page... "Dringo's Bowling... this... is this what happens at Dringo's Bowling? This book is simply a record of what's been going on?"
"No, not a record... a path." Sniper's brain spoke.
He got up, took the book from Grix, and placed it back in the shelf.
"Once upon a time, I tried to contact the other of this body... Sniper. I tried to talk to him, but he simply refused my conversation. It was many years before I finally gave in, and live alone in his mind."
"However, I drove myself insane, by being so lonely. Nothing mattered to me anymore... and with no desire to live, it made living hard, as I could not die."
"Eventually, I tried to create a companion, using the parts of the brain that Sniper would never use... taking power for myself, and using it to create company. It worked, and I managed to provide myself with a person that I could talk to."
"But only then that it dawned on me. Alone in a Godless world, who on earth, or in fact, in Sniper's mind, would want to live in such an awful place? The man I created committed suicide, with nothing left to live for."
"I knew I could make company... but I just needed to work out how the world itself worked... why people gave that hope to live on longer... to keep striding forward. It was the forces of challenge... making everyday different, with the chance to create havoc or peace from your heart within. I made the inhabitants of the world you see before you, as well as the world in which you are in yourself."
Grix breathed, trying to make sense of it all. "So all these books... these are the paths of the people you created?"
"Indeed. I am fate itself."
"Then why, if you are happy with your world you have created, must you permit us from leaving?"
"Because you have changed the balance of the world... the books are rewriting themselves because of your actions. I'm afraid to let you leave, because of the dust that you will leave behind in your place. My world would destroy itself before my eyes."
"But wouldn't it be better to get us out of your way, to stop the books rewriting, and let life try and equal out once more?"
Sniper's brain thought to himself for another moment. "I have studied the way of life for longer than you can imagine... longer than any of you, including Sniper, have lived. I understand the need for balance in civilisation; the ways of God's to keep equilibrium. Push something hard enough in one direction, and it takes the same amount of pushing in the other direction."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Grix asked.
"We can't just walk in and leave." Grix's brain replied. "Would you let us leave if we provided adequate compensation... if we pushed in the other direction for long enough?"
"I shall see. Put forward your proposal, and I'll consider it."
Grix squinted. "It's not about company any more for you... is it? It's power, and greed. You're the God of this world, and you won't give it up for anyone."
"For whom? The man that ignored my pleas for help? The man that simply turned his back on a dying soul? May he stay here for as long as he can. The book is written, and he will live the tale."
"But I thought you said that the books have rewritten themselves... surely they created more books for our presence?" Grix's brain asked...
"They did indeed. But I wrote a small book of my own." Sniper's brain said.
------------------
Grix and his brain stood outside in the silence.
"Explain to me what the hell he meant by that." Grix asked.
"All those books... he wrote them, they govern the ways of which people live. Every little detail. Their illnesses, to what their favourite colour is."
"Yeah, I get that much."
"When we entered, books rewrote themselves, and new books appeared to govern what would happen to us. Sniper's brain had no control over what went into them... right?"
"Ok, so what's this small book of his own?"
"I'm not sure... but I think he's trying to change fate. The only way he could do that would be to write a new book, adding small details in-between things that are destined to happen... it could be anything. If Sniper's favourite food was beefburgers, then he could intoxicate the whole burger supply, with a single line. He can't rewrite any of our books directly, but he can indirectly."
"I'm still confused." Grix said.
"I'm not surprised. Get in the car."
"Where are we going?"
"Dringo's bowling. We're going to try and change fate..." Grix's brain replied... "What's the time?"
Grix rolled up his sleeve, leaning on the car. "About half six."
"We've got an hour. Get in."
Pb sat at the head of the table... Goatboy, Meka and Venombyte all sat around it.
The bar was very busy... It was a gay bar, and after all, it WAS Sniper's mind...
"What person? There's someone else here too?"
Meka nodded. "It was as if he defied the laws of this place... jumping across the water, almost flying. He saved us all."
"Did you get a look at his face?"
"No... it was... there was this bright light behind him."
Pb thought.
"Didn't Sniper get rescued by someone not so long ago?" Goatboy said... "It's a possibility it's the same person."
"Do you think he knows who it is?"
"It's unlikely... I'm guessing this bloke, whoever he is, is the key to it all."
-------------------
"Your name is Grix Thraves. You are a sad geek. You were born on the 7th of August, and you are dead."
Grix looked at the man in the eyes.
"And you're my brain."
"Right. We're getting somewhere."
Grix's brain stomped around the back alley, smoking a cigar. "Look, you need to understand, to remember. I can't just keep telling you who you are, because you don't believe a sodding word I say."
"No, I do, really."
"Shut up. We're stuck on a Megadrive cartridge that's being controlled by Sniper's mind. Bill Gates, the Overlord, is stuck on here too in some form, and your body got a bit fried, so we're on here too."
The word Megadrive ringed around Grix's mind... it seemed so familiar, but he couldn't think why...
"What do you mean my body's a bit fried?"
"Dead. Burnt. I wouldn't be surprised if we had to stay here for the rest of our lives."
Grix looked at the floor. "Why the hell should I trust you?"
"...Look, I better take you to a friend. Someone you've know for a long time, but never actually met. He'll know what to do."
"Who? What? Who are we going to see?"
"Sniper's brain." Grix's brain replied.
The bar was very busy... It was a gay bar, and after all, it WAS Sniper's mind...
"What person? There's someone else here too?"
Meka nodded. "It was as if he defied the laws of this place... jumping across the water, almost flying. He saved us all."
"Did you get a look at his face?"
"No... it was... there was this bright light behind him."
Pb thought.
"Didn't Sniper get rescued by someone not so long ago?" Goatboy said... "It's a possibility it's the same person."
"Do you think he knows who it is?"
"It's unlikely... I'm guessing this bloke, whoever he is, is the key to it all."
-------------------
"Your name is Grix Thraves. You are a sad geek. You were born on the 7th of August, and you are dead."
Grix looked at the man in the eyes.
"And you're my brain."
"Right. We're getting somewhere."
Grix's brain stomped around the back alley, smoking a cigar. "Look, you need to understand, to remember. I can't just keep telling you who you are, because you don't believe a sodding word I say."
"No, I do, really."
"Shut up. We're stuck on a Megadrive cartridge that's being controlled by Sniper's mind. Bill Gates, the Overlord, is stuck on here too in some form, and your body got a bit fried, so we're on here too."
The word Megadrive ringed around Grix's mind... it seemed so familiar, but he couldn't think why...
"What do you mean my body's a bit fried?"
"Dead. Burnt. I wouldn't be surprised if we had to stay here for the rest of our lives."
Grix looked at the floor. "Why the hell should I trust you?"
"...Look, I better take you to a friend. Someone you've know for a long time, but never actually met. He'll know what to do."
"Who? What? Who are we going to see?"
"Sniper's brain." Grix's brain replied.
"What are you doing?" Ant said. He pulled out the wire.
And the story went back a few posts, so the author had some kind of chance of making a slightest bit of sense. Strafex's idea, actually. :0)
------------------
Sheepy stood in front of the three men.
Goatboy stared into his eyes, and pulled out a cigarette. He lit it.
"Sheepy. Long time no see."
"Good evening gentlemen." Sheepy said. "Having fun?"
"Not really. We want out." Meka said.
"Tough, you're stuck here." Sheepy replied. "And anyway, when in the story did you work out that this is all Sniper's mind? I thought the only people that knew were Pb and Grix's Brain."
The three men looked around. Then looked at their feet.
Sodding writers.
"Meka, I understand you want to know what happens when you die in here."
Meka didn't say anything.
And the three men found themselves in the centre of the ice-rink.
"Goodbye, gentlemen. See you in the next lifetime."
They all looked around... Venombyte started to run towards the side, to try and get out...
And almost instantly... the ice vanished, only leaving metres deep of freezing water.
Venombyte hit the water... and his whole body tensed... the pain was too much... too much...
Meka flailed in the water... trying to keep breathing...
Goatboy grabbed Meka... and pushed him under to try and keep him afloat.
Meka got back to the surface, and slapped Goatboy.
"Looks like this is... it... then..." Meka said between shivers...
Venombyte grabbed the side of the wall, and managed to drag himself out, where he immedietely blacked out.
"Ah... well... fun... while it... lasted... hey?..." Goatboy said...
He blacked out then.
Goatboy floated on the top of the water... Meka turned him a bit so his face was looking up...
And then... odd.
He swore he heard music.
Yes... yes... that was definitely music...
A window smashed on the far side of the room, and a man in a black cape and mask jumped through.
He flew jumped halfway across the room, and checked Venombyte's pulse. He seemed satisfied, and then ran across the water...
Meka looked through blurry eyes as the caped man strode across the surface of the water, grabbed him and Goatboy, and carried them out of the water...
Meka tried to clear his eyes, to see who it was...
A bright light appeared behind the masked man, and his cape began to sway in the wind.
And then he jumped out of the window.
And the story went back a few posts, so the author had some kind of chance of making a slightest bit of sense. Strafex's idea, actually. :0)
------------------
Sheepy stood in front of the three men.
Goatboy stared into his eyes, and pulled out a cigarette. He lit it.
"Sheepy. Long time no see."
"Good evening gentlemen." Sheepy said. "Having fun?"
"Not really. We want out." Meka said.
"Tough, you're stuck here." Sheepy replied. "And anyway, when in the story did you work out that this is all Sniper's mind? I thought the only people that knew were Pb and Grix's Brain."
The three men looked around. Then looked at their feet.
Sodding writers.
"Meka, I understand you want to know what happens when you die in here."
Meka didn't say anything.
And the three men found themselves in the centre of the ice-rink.
"Goodbye, gentlemen. See you in the next lifetime."
They all looked around... Venombyte started to run towards the side, to try and get out...
And almost instantly... the ice vanished, only leaving metres deep of freezing water.
Venombyte hit the water... and his whole body tensed... the pain was too much... too much...
Meka flailed in the water... trying to keep breathing...
Goatboy grabbed Meka... and pushed him under to try and keep him afloat.
Meka got back to the surface, and slapped Goatboy.
"Looks like this is... it... then..." Meka said between shivers...
Venombyte grabbed the side of the wall, and managed to drag himself out, where he immedietely blacked out.
"Ah... well... fun... while it... lasted... hey?..." Goatboy said...
He blacked out then.
Goatboy floated on the top of the water... Meka turned him a bit so his face was looking up...
And then... odd.
He swore he heard music.
Yes... yes... that was definitely music...
A window smashed on the far side of the room, and a man in a black cape and mask jumped through.
He flew jumped halfway across the room, and checked Venombyte's pulse. He seemed satisfied, and then ran across the water...
Meka looked through blurry eyes as the caped man strode across the surface of the water, grabbed him and Goatboy, and carried them out of the water...
Meka tried to clear his eyes, to see who it was...
A bright light appeared behind the masked man, and his cape began to sway in the wind.
And then he jumped out of the window.
Delta looked at the unit connecting the Megadrive emulator to Sniper brain. One of the leads had fallen out. Delta put it back in.
----------------------
Venombyte, Goatboy and Meka turned back.
They couldn't believe what they'd just seen.
They took a second to catch their breath and then turned around again. It was still there.
A giant egg, white with red spots, in full colour, just suddenly there.
It was certainly something they hadn't noticed earlier, had it been there before.
"Doesn't look very Sniper-ish to me. Where did that come from?"
exclaimed a surprise Meka.
'If it was Grix's brain we were in,' he thought to himself, 'but it's not, we're in Sniper's. What's this doing here?'
"Do you think that Strafex is messing with the system again?"
They all stared at each other in realisation.
Ofcourse! Strafex and Delta were at mission control!
Perhaps they could fill them in on what had been happening!
"Mission control! Can you hear us?"
Goatboy tried clapping. They all followed suit but it didn't work.
"The system's still down" he grumbled.
They decided to go back into the skating rink, only to find that it had been replaced with a block of offices.
There was a sign outside on the front.
It read "Swordspines Offices".
"Grix?"
They went inside and climbed to the top floor to look at the town from one of the top windows. The world was changing fast.
Various spots had become in full colour while others remained black and white.
They looked at each other. They too were colour while in this colour zone.
"What is Strafex playing at?"
"I'm not so sure that it's him. I think that it's something to do with Grix's mind inside the megadrive cartrige."
Venombyte and Goatboy stopped and stared at Meka.
"No!. It can't be! That would mean that..."
Meka nodded and pointed outside the window.
A plane was travelling by. It was far too realistic and detailed for Sniper's mind to bother with.
It was far too realistic and unimaginative for Grix to conjure up.
They had to find PB quickly...
and there was one more too, one who had gone missing as of late...
Fantasy Meister!
Where had he gone?
----------------------
Venombyte, Goatboy and Meka turned back.
They couldn't believe what they'd just seen.
They took a second to catch their breath and then turned around again. It was still there.
A giant egg, white with red spots, in full colour, just suddenly there.
It was certainly something they hadn't noticed earlier, had it been there before.
"Doesn't look very Sniper-ish to me. Where did that come from?"
exclaimed a surprise Meka.
'If it was Grix's brain we were in,' he thought to himself, 'but it's not, we're in Sniper's. What's this doing here?'
"Do you think that Strafex is messing with the system again?"
They all stared at each other in realisation.
Ofcourse! Strafex and Delta were at mission control!
Perhaps they could fill them in on what had been happening!
"Mission control! Can you hear us?"
Goatboy tried clapping. They all followed suit but it didn't work.
"The system's still down" he grumbled.
They decided to go back into the skating rink, only to find that it had been replaced with a block of offices.
There was a sign outside on the front.
It read "Swordspines Offices".
"Grix?"
They went inside and climbed to the top floor to look at the town from one of the top windows. The world was changing fast.
Various spots had become in full colour while others remained black and white.
They looked at each other. They too were colour while in this colour zone.
"What is Strafex playing at?"
"I'm not so sure that it's him. I think that it's something to do with Grix's mind inside the megadrive cartrige."
Venombyte and Goatboy stopped and stared at Meka.
"No!. It can't be! That would mean that..."
Meka nodded and pointed outside the window.
A plane was travelling by. It was far too realistic and detailed for Sniper's mind to bother with.
It was far too realistic and unimaginative for Grix to conjure up.
They had to find PB quickly...
and there was one more too, one who had gone missing as of late...
Fantasy Meister!
Where had he gone?
The clever people go on Prime.
Ho ho ho.
Actually, don't chat in here. There's enough crap in here as there is...
Kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding...
:0)
Ho ho ho.
Actually, don't chat in here. There's enough crap in here as there is...
Kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding kidding...
:0)
As if you'd ever do something like that....
I WAS trying to do a noir detective story but nobody caught on... Red Dwarf rip off indeed...
"What was that? Did the author say something?"
Ah, sod off.
"What was that? Did the author say something?"
Ah, sod off.
pb looked at the umbrella in his shaking hands. What was going on in this place? One miniute he'd been in the pub... then three suspicious looking men had walked in.. and suddenly he'd been outside. He inured one of them... and then they'd vanished.
This wasn't the work of Sniper's mind. There was something else going on in here. Something powerful. He had to find out what it was. Had to.
pb strolled back into the pub, oblivious to the fact that he was now wearing a cape-coat and a deerstalker hat...
-------------------
Goatboy, Meka, and VenomByte stood outside the figureskating rink.
And that's exactly what they were worried about.
Goatboy turned to Meka with an incredulous look on his face. "What the hell is this doing in Sniper's mind?"
"Maybe Sniper had an interest in figureskating?" Meka suggested, hopefully.
Goatboy replied with a raising of the eyebrows.
"I think we can safely assume" Goatboy continued, "that this isn't one of Sniper's main interests. Which means it shouldn't be here."
"Unless it represents some part of his personality?" VenomByte pointed out
Meka sighed
"Does everything around here have to be based on that Red Dwarf episode?"
"Not necessarily." replied VenomByte, pausing for a moment, "Could be based on the book."
"Is that why we're in black and white?"
"Yep"
"So what are we going to do now?"
A voice spoke from behind them
"You're not going anywhere..."
They turned to see....
This wasn't the work of Sniper's mind. There was something else going on in here. Something powerful. He had to find out what it was. Had to.
pb strolled back into the pub, oblivious to the fact that he was now wearing a cape-coat and a deerstalker hat...
-------------------
Goatboy, Meka, and VenomByte stood outside the figureskating rink.
And that's exactly what they were worried about.
Goatboy turned to Meka with an incredulous look on his face. "What the hell is this doing in Sniper's mind?"
"Maybe Sniper had an interest in figureskating?" Meka suggested, hopefully.
Goatboy replied with a raising of the eyebrows.
"I think we can safely assume" Goatboy continued, "that this isn't one of Sniper's main interests. Which means it shouldn't be here."
"Unless it represents some part of his personality?" VenomByte pointed out
Meka sighed
"Does everything around here have to be based on that Red Dwarf episode?"
"Not necessarily." replied VenomByte, pausing for a moment, "Could be based on the book."
"Is that why we're in black and white?"
"Yep"
"So what are we going to do now?"
A voice spoke from behind them
"You're not going anywhere..."
They turned to see....
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