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Thanks er-no
THE COMPETITION IS NOW CLOSED.
er-no will decide the winner on the basis of amusement only.
THE DEATH OF SNIPER.
The competition. Well its simple.
You guys have until the 26 August to write ways in which Sniper dies.
This can be in many different styles eg. One liner, quick story or a few paragraphs.
The entry that is the most funny and well written wins a gameaday. You can enter as many times as you want Sniper to die.
Staff members cannot enter (I think).
And remember MY decision is final.
Hint: Keep it funny and not too long.
CLOSING: 26 August
THE COMPETITION IS NOW CLOSED.
er-no will decide the winner on the basis of amusement only.
THE DEATH OF SNIPER.
The competition. Well its simple.
You guys have until the 26 August to write ways in which Sniper dies.
This can be in many different styles eg. One liner, quick story or a few paragraphs.
The entry that is the most funny and well written wins a gameaday. You can enter as many times as you want Sniper to die.
Staff members cannot enter (I think).
And remember MY decision is final.
Hint: Keep it funny and not too long.
CLOSING: 26 August
Page:
Sniper looked up at FOG towers and their stood Dringo atop of the building, he had unwittingly helped cause the war that had ripped the building apart, Sniper couldn't take his eyes off of him and then Dringo jumped.
Sniper knew it was because of what he had done and looked down at the ground and then... SPLAT
Dringo landed on Sniper, Dringo brushes off and stood up, woops he said before going bsck in to FOG to face the inevitable booing.
Sniper knew it was because of what he had done and looked down at the ground and then... SPLAT
Dringo landed on Sniper, Dringo brushes off and stood up, woops he said before going bsck in to FOG to face the inevitable booing.
er-no wrote:
> That was super Dav1d... but its only Snipers terrible death i am interested in!
Not his after death experiences.
---
Think Im gonna have to work on it a little! :-)
Still pretty damn funny though!
> That was super Dav1d... but its only Snipers terrible death i am interested in!
Not his after death experiences.
---
Think Im gonna have to work on it a little! :-)
Still pretty damn funny though!
Sniper sits calmly in his sniping position, staring down the barrel of his rifle, waiting for Ultra-covert agent 'Firm Worm' to step into his line of fire through the minefield. Unfortunately no-one told Sniper that Worm had been shot in the back by some random grunt who had seen him taking a leak against the wall of a building whilst still trying to pretend to be a cardboard box. Sniper eventually died of hypothermia, pneumonia and cramp all at once and was eaten by wolves.
Sniper logs on to ukchatforums one days to discover to his surprise that he has been banned. Sniper is in shock, he has been a long time notable and after thousands of posts he in now banned! Sniper checks his email's still in shock and recieves 1 new message from ER-NO!!! Sniper reads the email.
"What!" Sniper gets out his gun and hunts down er-no. This is what the email said:
"Dear Sniper, It's me er-no unlucky I hacked into your Special Reserve account and posted loads of crap to get you in BIG trouble *he he*!
Sniper arrives at er-no's street, he kicks some pentioners out of a house opposite er-no's house and places his sniper on an upstair windo sil. Sniper sits watching er-no type away on ukchatforms, suddenly er-no is distracted by 2 '90' year old pentioners banging at his door. Er-no gets up and answers the door, er-no lets them into his house as they tell him what has just happened. Er-no realises it is Sniper and tells the *retired navy seals pentioners* what to do.
The 2 old women like what they hear from er-no, er-no hands them both 5 grenades and UZI's each. Whilst Sniper is still aiming at er-no's bedroom window, the pentioners quietly sneek into the room where Sniper is, they remember the advise from er-no to shoot him in the kneecaps where he will feel the most pain, then to leave him bleeding for 1 hour. They then drag him into the middle of er-no's street, THEN!!! er-no comes running from his house and kicks Sniper in the head.
er-no remembers that cool part of Reservoir Dogs were the copper gets his ear chopped off, er-no gets a kitchen knife out of his house and chops both ears off.
Haaaaaahaha, Sniper in know feeling faint from loosing so much blood, bur no! er-no wants him alive to feel more pain. er-no runs into his house yet again and makes a cup of coffee, er-no forces it all down his mouth burning his insides ans scolding his face! er-no now feels tired and walks into his mansion, he syas to the pentioners
"finish him off girls!" as er-no walks into his house the penrioners get there distance and finally finish Sniper off by throwing 10 grenades at him.
"What!" Sniper gets out his gun and hunts down er-no. This is what the email said:
"Dear Sniper, It's me er-no unlucky I hacked into your Special Reserve account and posted loads of crap to get you in BIG trouble *he he*!
Sniper arrives at er-no's street, he kicks some pentioners out of a house opposite er-no's house and places his sniper on an upstair windo sil. Sniper sits watching er-no type away on ukchatforms, suddenly er-no is distracted by 2 '90' year old pentioners banging at his door. Er-no gets up and answers the door, er-no lets them into his house as they tell him what has just happened. Er-no realises it is Sniper and tells the *retired navy seals pentioners* what to do.
The 2 old women like what they hear from er-no, er-no hands them both 5 grenades and UZI's each. Whilst Sniper is still aiming at er-no's bedroom window, the pentioners quietly sneek into the room where Sniper is, they remember the advise from er-no to shoot him in the kneecaps where he will feel the most pain, then to leave him bleeding for 1 hour. They then drag him into the middle of er-no's street, THEN!!! er-no comes running from his house and kicks Sniper in the head.
er-no remembers that cool part of Reservoir Dogs were the copper gets his ear chopped off, er-no gets a kitchen knife out of his house and chops both ears off.
Haaaaaahaha, Sniper in know feeling faint from loosing so much blood, bur no! er-no wants him alive to feel more pain. er-no runs into his house yet again and makes a cup of coffee, er-no forces it all down his mouth burning his insides ans scolding his face! er-no now feels tired and walks into his mansion, he syas to the pentioners
"finish him off girls!" as er-no walks into his house the penrioners get there distance and finally finish Sniper off by throwing 10 grenades at him.
That was super Dav1d... but its only Snipers terrible death i am interested in!
Not his after death experiences.
Not his after death experiences.
Dav1d wrote:
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really
> gonna hate Fridays.
LOL, but you didnt say how he died.
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really
> gonna hate Fridays.
LOL, but you didnt say how he died.
One day Sniper dies (funnily enough!) and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...
Demon: Why so glum chum?
Sniper: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Sniper: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Sniper: Gee that sounds great.
Demon: You a smoker?
Sniper: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Sniper: Wow...that's...awesome!
Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Sniper: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.
Demon: You into drugs?
Sniper: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Sniper: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!
Demon: You gay?
Sniper: Er-no.
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.
Demon: Why so glum chum?
Sniper: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Sniper: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Sniper: Gee that sounds great.
Demon: You a smoker?
Sniper: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Sniper: Wow...that's...awesome!
Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Sniper: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.
Demon: You into drugs?
Sniper: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Sniper: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!
Demon: You gay?
Sniper: Er-no.
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.
Whilst following his next "Hit" sniper enters a very suspicious looking building, he passes through a metal detector, it pings and he is approached by a guard. Through fear that he may be caught he quickly pulls out his guns, time slows down.
He now performs a series of acrobatical manovures, all the while firing his guns at key moments, time resumes to normal speed. All guards are dead. He has lost sight of his "hit", he quickly runs furiously towards the elevator, where he slips on a rogue piece of dog dirt, which was left as a gift from the guard dog, he flys toward the elevator and falls down the empty shaft, his neck is broken in several places, he is dead.
He now performs a series of acrobatical manovures, all the while firing his guns at key moments, time resumes to normal speed. All guards are dead. He has lost sight of his "hit", he quickly runs furiously towards the elevator, where he slips on a rogue piece of dog dirt, which was left as a gift from the guard dog, he flys toward the elevator and falls down the empty shaft, his neck is broken in several places, he is dead.
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