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Being a die-hard Nintendo fan is not easy you know. Every morning I get up, bow to my Gamecube, kiss all my joy pads and religiously study the manuals of all my Nintendo games (SNES. NES, N64, Gamecube and Gameboy). Every piece of negative news I spin into a positive light, I do it so well, Nintendo should hire me as their PR wizard.
But I’ve had enough. Nintendo you are one ******* stupid bloody piece of ****. That’s right it is I, the legendary Dringo, he who can not be slain by Playstation and starves off the threat of the X-box who is saying this you proud ******. What the hell are you playing at? I’m a WESTERN NINTENDO FAN, I don’t get all those ******* titles from Japan with the words Giftipia or Animal Forest printed on the side. And the ones I do get, Doshin the ******* Giant, turns out to be a pile of utter toss.
Every time I spin some negative news article into a positive light but why? Who’s the idiot now ah? You cut second party ties with a certain Left Field, Left Field (NBA courtside and Excitebike 64) are your sports developer; they make your sports games. But oh look you don’t REALLY need them now SEGA has gone multi-format with their sports range. So remove them, who cares. Oh well look at that, less than a year later and SEGA cancel all their sports titles for the Gamecube. WOOPS! Now whom can you turn to? That’s right NO ONE, I have noticed you are now making your own mature sports games (the upcoming Legend of Golfer) but it’s too late.
Ah yes Nintendo, now onto Rare Ware. My previous status was that “they’re crap anyway” and that “they lost Nintendo money”. ********, you ARE dumb aren’t you Nintendo? Want to know why they didn’t make you much money in the year before you sold them? Because they didn’t ACTUALLY release any bloody games! Rare Ware are an unresponsive developer but they were your other half, they are more than Silicon Knights, Left Field, HAL etc... put together. They made Banjo, Conker, Killer Instinct, Donkey Kong and Perfect Dark… all of these are BIG Nintendo releases, well they would have been if you hadn’t ******* sold them! Look at this, your sales aren’t up to scratch! Could this be down to a certain absence of a company that made half your AAA titles? It nearly forced me away, but then that was okay, at least you have Retro Studios and Silicon Knights.
Oh Sympathy where have you gone.
First off you crush Retro Studio’s. A bit of a re-shuffle was needed, EAD’s help was appreciated on Metroid Prime. BUT did you really need to destroy the 4 teams that were there into 1? Raven Blade, that racer and that football game WAS exactly what Nintendo Gamecube lacks. A decent footy game, a decent exclusive racing title and a mature action RPG. But you cancelled them. Did you really have to scrap all those games?
And now modern day. The one that made me snap. I love Silicon Knights. True they are hardly a true example of Nintendo (prefer cinematic gameplay and adult games) but that was the point. Nintendo you’ve told me time and time again how you want to be more “adult” and Eternal Darkness and Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes are YOUR most mature games. And you cut ties with the company behind them? Too Human can now return to the PS2, which it was originally coded for, and you’ve lost yet another special western developer.
I know Nintendo. You have loads of second parties, some I never even knew about including that new sports developer SETA (ever heard of them? No neither have I). But Rare, Silicon Knights, the full Retro team and Left Field could have all pushed Nintendo in both Europe and America. You would have defeated Microsoft and competed more fiercely. But instead you try to get exclusives from other companies that simply do not sell. Capcom are having to cancel their plans to keep Viewtiful Joe and Killer 7 exclusive and cannot wait for the Resident Evil deal to expire. Namco are doing okay but that’s because they hardly support Nintendo as much as they support Sony. SEGA have been drifting away ever so slowly, remember the Virtual Fighter RPG and the sonic series were once exclusive to Nintendo. They are both now lost.
So tell me Nintendo, who do you have left to sell your product to the western world? You don’t have Rare, you don’t have Silicon Knights, you don’t have Left field. Christ you don’t even have Capcom anymore. And in fact you’ve even lost Dringo, your most avid supporter. Sure I love Zelda and Mario, but I’m a western gamer, I have western needs and the only western game you actually make is Metroid Prime, and I don’t even like it.
Maybe one day you’ll acquire some killer, high profile companies such as Capcom, Midway or Free Radical Design. But in the mean time I need to raise funds for an X-box. After all a western Nintendo fan needs his Rare.
Dringo.
But I’ve had enough. Nintendo you are one ******* stupid bloody piece of ****. That’s right it is I, the legendary Dringo, he who can not be slain by Playstation and starves off the threat of the X-box who is saying this you proud ******. What the hell are you playing at? I’m a WESTERN NINTENDO FAN, I don’t get all those ******* titles from Japan with the words Giftipia or Animal Forest printed on the side. And the ones I do get, Doshin the ******* Giant, turns out to be a pile of utter toss.
Every time I spin some negative news article into a positive light but why? Who’s the idiot now ah? You cut second party ties with a certain Left Field, Left Field (NBA courtside and Excitebike 64) are your sports developer; they make your sports games. But oh look you don’t REALLY need them now SEGA has gone multi-format with their sports range. So remove them, who cares. Oh well look at that, less than a year later and SEGA cancel all their sports titles for the Gamecube. WOOPS! Now whom can you turn to? That’s right NO ONE, I have noticed you are now making your own mature sports games (the upcoming Legend of Golfer) but it’s too late.
Ah yes Nintendo, now onto Rare Ware. My previous status was that “they’re crap anyway” and that “they lost Nintendo money”. ********, you ARE dumb aren’t you Nintendo? Want to know why they didn’t make you much money in the year before you sold them? Because they didn’t ACTUALLY release any bloody games! Rare Ware are an unresponsive developer but they were your other half, they are more than Silicon Knights, Left Field, HAL etc... put together. They made Banjo, Conker, Killer Instinct, Donkey Kong and Perfect Dark… all of these are BIG Nintendo releases, well they would have been if you hadn’t ******* sold them! Look at this, your sales aren’t up to scratch! Could this be down to a certain absence of a company that made half your AAA titles? It nearly forced me away, but then that was okay, at least you have Retro Studios and Silicon Knights.
Oh Sympathy where have you gone.
First off you crush Retro Studio’s. A bit of a re-shuffle was needed, EAD’s help was appreciated on Metroid Prime. BUT did you really need to destroy the 4 teams that were there into 1? Raven Blade, that racer and that football game WAS exactly what Nintendo Gamecube lacks. A decent footy game, a decent exclusive racing title and a mature action RPG. But you cancelled them. Did you really have to scrap all those games?
And now modern day. The one that made me snap. I love Silicon Knights. True they are hardly a true example of Nintendo (prefer cinematic gameplay and adult games) but that was the point. Nintendo you’ve told me time and time again how you want to be more “adult” and Eternal Darkness and Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes are YOUR most mature games. And you cut ties with the company behind them? Too Human can now return to the PS2, which it was originally coded for, and you’ve lost yet another special western developer.
I know Nintendo. You have loads of second parties, some I never even knew about including that new sports developer SETA (ever heard of them? No neither have I). But Rare, Silicon Knights, the full Retro team and Left Field could have all pushed Nintendo in both Europe and America. You would have defeated Microsoft and competed more fiercely. But instead you try to get exclusives from other companies that simply do not sell. Capcom are having to cancel their plans to keep Viewtiful Joe and Killer 7 exclusive and cannot wait for the Resident Evil deal to expire. Namco are doing okay but that’s because they hardly support Nintendo as much as they support Sony. SEGA have been drifting away ever so slowly, remember the Virtual Fighter RPG and the sonic series were once exclusive to Nintendo. They are both now lost.
So tell me Nintendo, who do you have left to sell your product to the western world? You don’t have Rare, you don’t have Silicon Knights, you don’t have Left field. Christ you don’t even have Capcom anymore. And in fact you’ve even lost Dringo, your most avid supporter. Sure I love Zelda and Mario, but I’m a western gamer, I have western needs and the only western game you actually make is Metroid Prime, and I don’t even like it.
Maybe one day you’ll acquire some killer, high profile companies such as Capcom, Midway or Free Radical Design. But in the mean time I need to raise funds for an X-box. After all a western Nintendo fan needs his Rare.
Dringo.
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+ it's 16 player system link.
Rickoss wrote:
> Hedfix wrote:
> Duh! I totally forgot Halo was 16 player WAY before MK:DD, online
> AND
> offline.
>
> Not for the XBox. But meh.
Gamespy + Xboxconnect
> Hedfix wrote:
> Duh! I totally forgot Halo was 16 player WAY before MK:DD, online
> AND
> offline.
>
> Not for the XBox. But meh.
Gamespy + Xboxconnect
Strafio wrote:
> Unless you count Xbconnect! ;-)
Is that like Warp Pipe but for Xbox?
> Unless you count Xbconnect! ;-)
Is that like Warp Pipe but for Xbox?
Unless you count Xbconnect! ;-)
Hedfix wrote:
> Duh! I totally forgot Halo was 16 player WAY before MK:DD, online AND
> offline.
Not for the XBox. But meh.
> Duh! I totally forgot Halo was 16 player WAY before MK:DD, online AND
> offline.
Not for the XBox. But meh.
Icaruss wrote:
> Heh, obviously you don't know you can play onlne games with your PC
> then, eh.
no, what's this Quake thing I was playing ages ago?
I was talking about consoles (thank god because PC gaming's generally crap in my opinion and yes I've played a lot of PC games online and off).
> Heh, obviously you don't know you can play onlne games with your PC
> then, eh.
no, what's this Quake thing I was playing ages ago?
I was talking about consoles (thank god because PC gaming's generally crap in my opinion and yes I've played a lot of PC games online and off).
Swish!
Heh, obviously you don't know you can play onlne games with your PC then, eh.
Duh! I totally forgot Halo was 16 player WAY before MK:DD, online AND offline.
Jigglypuff does indeed say it all.
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