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With a quite badly upset stomach, wearing nothing but my boxers, and they're round my ankles.
When all of a sudden, a large wolf spider (about 2 inches in diameter)comes marching out from between the bath and cabinet, straight towards me across the floor.
I swear, if I hadn't already done so, I'd have shat myself.
What to do? I dare not stand up, I've nothing to squish it with, and there's no point screaming like a girl because there's no-one around to hear it. And besides, the door's locked.
Employing my strictly limited contortionist skills to keep my butt firmly on the loo, I stretch... stretch... stretch... across the bathroom sink and manage to grab a can of deodourant and pop the lid off.
It's a life or death struggle as the thing edges ever closer. Suddenly I see my opportunity, and... BAM! I slam the lid down sharply.
When the dust settles, I see that - thanks to my years of hand-eye coordination training on videogames - my aim was true, and the beast is caged. I'm safe at last.
At least until I go back to dispose of the monster. I swear I can hear it snarling.
When all of a sudden, a large wolf spider (about 2 inches in diameter)comes marching out from between the bath and cabinet, straight towards me across the floor.
I swear, if I hadn't already done so, I'd have shat myself.
What to do? I dare not stand up, I've nothing to squish it with, and there's no point screaming like a girl because there's no-one around to hear it. And besides, the door's locked.
Employing my strictly limited contortionist skills to keep my butt firmly on the loo, I stretch... stretch... stretch... across the bathroom sink and manage to grab a can of deodourant and pop the lid off.
It's a life or death struggle as the thing edges ever closer. Suddenly I see my opportunity, and... BAM! I slam the lid down sharply.
When the dust settles, I see that - thanks to my years of hand-eye coordination training on videogames - my aim was true, and the beast is caged. I'm safe at last.
At least until I go back to dispose of the monster. I swear I can hear it snarling.
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That's a great way to solve constipation......
This is how I felt when it happened...
[URL]http://www.santoalt.com/videos/395_Toilet_Scare.html[/URL]
WARNING: Contains some rude language.
[URL]http://www.santoalt.com/videos/395_Toilet_Scare.html[/URL]
WARNING: Contains some rude language.
[URL]http://www.gutrumbles.com/archives/002687.php[/URL]
Aww Jesus, the spiders at my girlfriend's Aunt's house were mutants. There were loads of them, all humongous beyond reason. We looked after it for a week, and I had to stop walking around barefoot once we realised how many there were. MASSIVE. We had to use a pint glass to catch them, even then they barely fitted.
Twain wrote:
> Egham has also closed. I'm sure there was another one, because there
> used to be eight, but I can't remember where it was.
>
> Was it Westminster?
I'm guessing... wrong thread?
> Egham has also closed. I'm sure there was another one, because there
> used to be eight, but I can't remember where it was.
>
> Was it Westminster?
I'm guessing... wrong thread?
Egham has also closed. I'm sure there was another one, because there used to be eight, but I can't remember where it was.
Was it Westminster?
Was it Westminster?
Yes I know I do but did you know we swallow 10 spider's in a lifetime :O
C®ø§$ Bób wrote:
> Now there's just Pathetic little one's in my house that you could
> swallow easily in your sleep.
*splutters*
Ok, you make this *far* too easy.
> Now there's just Pathetic little one's in my house that you could
> swallow easily in your sleep.
*splutters*
Ok, you make this *far* too easy.
Now there's just Pathetic little one's in my house that you could swallow easily in your sleep.
C®ø§$ Bób wrote:
> I had one in my house which was very big.
Aaaahahahahahahahaa!
> I had one in my house which was very big.
Aaaahahahahahahahaa!
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