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"Goatboy lays into the Star Wars prequel"

Warning: contains frothy-mouthed hatred and Lucas-rage.
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Does anyone actually know Stifler's real name?

Stifler & The Rock?

Hedfix wrote:
> Hmmmm good fights?
>
> I saw BulletProof Monk and

Stop right there.

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Carry on.

Hmmmm good fights?

I saw BulletProof Monk and Welcome to the Jungle today, both had some of the best fights I've seen for quite a while.

"...with Obi-Wan progressing to master all by himself just by frowning"

Hahahah.

I think that's probably the prequel's biggest problems - it's all far too superficial, and half the film is simply there for the sake of being there, for looking pretty and for people to make games from.

Mr Snuggly wrote:
> Hmm, that's one of the only lines I changed in the whole thing, I
> wrote that.
--------

Yet it's one of the only lines somebody has issue with.
Tsk tsk, you don't touch up The Mona Lisa sonny...

Snuggly's right though and I hadn't touched on it. The fights are just there for show, no result or point to them.
The originals? Only lightsaber battle in New Hope was a fight between an old man in his twilight years and Vader who probably hadn't fought anybody with one since his battle with Obi-Wan in the volcano. Rusty & stumbly.
Empire? Luke vs Vader, down and dirty with things being hurled. It hurt, Luke is battered and bruised, gets his hand lopped off.
Jedi? Climactic battle with Emperor joining in.
Only 3 proper fights in all 3 films, used sparingly and they had consequence.

Whereas the new ones it's just an excuse for videogame tie-in scenes. Yoda bouncing around like a stunt flea, nobody dies.
Anakin & Saruman go at it, he loses a hand but nobody dies and there's no point.
The only battle with consequence is the showdown between Anakin & Obi-Wan.
The rest is just CGI crapness.

And at what point could R2 fly? I remember in Jedi, he had to be rescued from the sand with 3PO by Calrissian before they flew off. R2 had to fire Luke's saber at him when, apparently, it could've just flown over.
Or in Empire when R2 falls into the Dagobah swamps and uses his periscope. Why not just fly out?
Balls. Utter balls.

IV's "battle" is almost embarrassing by today's standards. But the rest of the film is still amazing, and that's what counts - the massive spaceships are still impressive, and there a sense of atmosphere about it completely missing from I.

All 6 are movies for children and merchandisers.

They have very little worth beyond that.

I really couldn't think of a worse start to the prequels than a film that seemingly had no link to the others at all.

Most of the lightsabre battles in the prequels are pretty great, though. Watch the fights in the original trilogy, they're awful. It's all about the space battles in the originals.