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"My school has the best stories"

In year 9, while waiting for art class to begin, a group of boys descended on a kid called James Paye, who was always getting picked on.

They lifted him up in front of a large piece of some kind of board that was on the wall, and used a staple gun to staple the edges of his clothes to the board. He was stuck to the wall two feet off the ground for about 15 minutes.


Also in year 10, while I was in the creative arts block with some other people, this stupid little year 8 moron started giving us some lip. So Anthony Whymark grabbed him, picked up a big real of gaffa tape and taped his entire head up so he looked like a mummy.

That Anthony also got a refferal from the head of lower school (Yr 7-11) for calling the can machine Jewish after it swallowed his money without spitting out a drink.



Beat that.

Our Maths teacher used to spin them big 1 metre rulers on his head after we had been good.

The guy was complete clown. Hair was like krusty the clown! Still got a B in maths somehow though.

My friend got some ink on his hands and used a whole box of tesco tissues to get it off. The french teacher kept us bakc for using them.

I still laugh, *holding empty box* "These cost me 30p!", "it's because of this my daughter asks if she can have her pocket money and I have to say no!"

I liturally laughed in her face for about 30 seconds. The next day I brought 15p in to cover the debts.

Oh, and my crazy hippy english teacher, "Let's all have a nice frrrresh, cllllllllean sheeeeeeeeet of paaaaaaaaper"

One would be too many for comfort.

My form teacher found this kid measuring his w*ng. i wasn't there, but plenty of eye witnesses. Perhaps too many for comfort....

FinalFantasyFanatic wrote:
> Someone found one of the hollow rubber dog balls, with spikes - but
> that really, really hard rubber.

Did you go to my school?

Oh yeah, and near the end almost the whole of year 11 (my year) lined one of the corridors (a main one) all lunchtime and shoved all the little gimps around as the tried to make their merry way along.
How nasty.

Also: there was dogball.
Best. Game. Ever.
Someone found one of the hollow rubber dog balls, with spikes - but that really, really hard rubber.

Group of people run to one end of the corridor, group to the other. Boot the ball at eachother. Simple, painful entertainment.
Managed to play unhinded for quite a while as well.

I think at least one teacher always has a nervous break down in everyone's school. The French teacher in my case. Funny.

Also: we were trying to knock all the seaguls off the roof with stones. Ben Janes fecked a shot up and John Rogers got knocked out for about 10 minutes. Ahar. Crimpleclit.

Also: the reason everyone was fat and unheathly in my school is because everytime anyone had an apple or orange is got lobbed across at the chavs.
Funnest day was when someone went home at lunch and came back near the end with about 50 apples and loads of those big, cheap bottles of lemonade which were shook and lobbed most wonderfully.

Also: there was this evil pigeon. One of the white ones. It never flew away - just sat right next to me (or Chris) looking on with that mocking stare. Always chased the cockshank, never got it.
Until near the end of year 11. Booted the fannyslat one up the ass
Sweet revenge.

That's about it methinks.

We drove our Home Economics teacher to a nervous breakdown.

Well, I just kind of sat there eating everyone's chocolate decorative things.

SOME teacher saw and came over, who SHRIEKED and CRIED OUT.

And all was well.

WHat happened?