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Forever Me
I'm in a state of depression. At a crossroads at which each path looks bleak and dank.They always say to be yourself but that is what they say and i am not one of them.
I could ignore who i am and continue down my original path after all change is hard.I long to see the end of my time to lie alone and know that it is over, that there is nothing more that i have to do. But that is a long way off and all though i long for the end i must wait, i will not shorten the time it takes it to come. To be my self would be bliss i could for once stop hiding, i would be free. But they would not like that for i am not one of them.
So i hide i push my true self down and cover it in layers of a reflected personality. When they are happy i will be happy, when they are sad i will be sad. Maybe one day the part of me that is me will burn out, the flicker of soul will extingush and i will truely be one of them. But if it will not die if i am to be me for the rest of my existance what then? They know i am not one of them they sense it. I am not one of them.
I push everyone away so that they do not see my soul, the true me but it does not always work. When the walls weaken and the true me escapes they do not like it. I am the enemy. They wish to hunt me down and stamp out the fire that burns within me, but when they leave and I am nothing but ashes the fire rekindles itself and the walls rebuild themselves and i will remain forever me.
I am not one of them.
I'm in a state of depression. At a crossroads at which each path looks bleak and dank.They always say to be yourself but that is what they say and i am not one of them.
I could ignore who i am and continue down my original path after all change is hard.I long to see the end of my time to lie alone and know that it is over, that there is nothing more that i have to do. But that is a long way off and all though i long for the end i must wait, i will not shorten the time it takes it to come. To be my self would be bliss i could for once stop hiding, i would be free. But they would not like that for i am not one of them.
So i hide i push my true self down and cover it in layers of a reflected personality. When they are happy i will be happy, when they are sad i will be sad. Maybe one day the part of me that is me will burn out, the flicker of soul will extingush and i will truely be one of them. But if it will not die if i am to be me for the rest of my existance what then? They know i am not one of them they sense it. I am not one of them.
I push everyone away so that they do not see my soul, the true me but it does not always work. When the walls weaken and the true me escapes they do not like it. I am the enemy. They wish to hunt me down and stamp out the fire that burns within me, but when they leave and I am nothing but ashes the fire rekindles itself and the walls rebuild themselves and i will remain forever me.
I am not one of them.
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Deathskitten wrote:
> I always write better when i'm depressed.
I find it impossible to write when i'm like that, i become so critical that anything i write just instantly goes in the bin, so i dont bother any more.
> I always write better when i'm depressed.
I find it impossible to write when i'm like that, i become so critical that anything i write just instantly goes in the bin, so i dont bother any more.
Flockhart wrote:
> Just reading through poetry corner and thought i should mention that i
> loved FOR ALL TIME.
thank you! i was going through a rough patch and felt like i had been abandoned. i always write better when i'm depressed.
> Just reading through poetry corner and thought i should mention that i
> loved FOR ALL TIME.
thank you! i was going through a rough patch and felt like i had been abandoned. i always write better when i'm depressed.
hey sorry if i haven't been coming on lately but i have exams and revising all the time. i'm normally on thursdays between 12 and 1:45.
I hope Deathskitten responds to this post. I want to know how you're doing. Well, I hope. You posted at one time that no one cares "whether I live or die." I care. Others here do, too. So tell us how you're doing. We want to know.
Flockhart wrote:
> Just reading through poetry corner and thought i should mention that i
> loved FOR ALL TIME.
Interesting style, eh? Some people have that gift.
> Just reading through poetry corner and thought i should mention that i
> loved FOR ALL TIME.
Interesting style, eh? Some people have that gift.
Just reading through poetry corner and thought i should mention that i loved FOR ALL TIME.
Hey where you been??
Pick a time where we can chat here. (Day too please) I keep wierd hours.
Pick a time where we can chat here. (Day too please) I keep wierd hours.
Life sucks...
i don't have any money to shop i'm so poor... damn.... i really should get a job but i can't be arsed...
True, Paradox.
When in doubt, go shopping!!
When in doubt, go shopping!!
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