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"Police Caution"

What a fun night. Went to the cinema to see 50 First Dates with my girlfriend then we went to the pub to meet some mates afterwards. My bony little friend went to the bar to try and get served, asked for ID, whips out his fake ID, "Sorry we don't accept those!" he looked absolutely mortified! Wierdly enough they had last orders at half ten and threw us out at half eleven. So we roamed the streets to get a greasy burger and sat on a bench.

I really, REALLY needed a leak so I decided to slosh all over the side of a ford estate car. "Sh*t Kyle" one of my mates shouts. I thought the owner/s of the car were coming back so zipped up and began to walk hastily away from the car. It wasn't the owners of the cars. Oh no. I was a police van. "Now thats not a good idea, son" one of the police men said shakily, he was probably intimidated by the size of my wang. "Move along please sir". I did.

Apparently public urination is a crime - and I woke up this morning to find a ticket in my wallet thats says "Inspection No. 18"... whether thats something to do with the police stopping me I don't know. I don't have a hangover though - hurrah.

I have to go and lay a carpet down in my room now. Bye bye kiddies.

Kyle, pissin' on someones car, why would you want to do that, why?

;)

Haha very much so :)

Bony little friend eh? Not your friend then :)

I think that's what they'd call a great irony of life.

I hope that, if you are ever old enough to get a car, Paradox, someone who drinks a lot of petrol feels the need to leak all over your car and then set fire to their urine. And then batter you with the most steel rod known to man.

Oh, but walls are acceptable.
And the classic bushes.

cookie monster wrote:
> Sorry, but peeing on someones car makes you a knobbler.

I can't help but agree, really. Kinda retarded...
Hmm.

IS THAT IT!?

My friend sir Thomas is one who takes a liking to going out and getting rat assed.

The boy will go clubbing on a tuesday wednesday and thursday and turn up to English still drunk bashing his head against the desk...

Funnily enough he is the cleverest boy in our school and is probably going to Oxford *huffs*

ANYWAY... he was running down a long road from Billericay after a long session and pub crawl in the highstreet. The boy was hammered... and I mean Hammmmmered....

He didnt know where his mates had got to and the fact was e ran off whilst they were far behind the same road just laughing at him running off oblivious. Along a MAIN ROAD he decided he really needed to pee so let himself wizz at a bus stop...


So Poor old tom with his wanger in his both hands and pee on his shoes is Beeped at scaring the ba jeepers out of him. He turns around to see two fat police men in a their car smiling at him.. 'what ya think your doing son' ... 'im uh uh uh ... wweeeing sir!'


*at this point the others are running towards Tom thinking he has done something very very wrong... *

Anyway - Tom had to pay a 'on the spot fine' of £40 pounds and turn up and give his name and address (I think) with the money within the week...

He didnt actually get a record or anything.

But you.. a tellin off with your wanger and p£ss all over some poor buggerss van


*tut tuts*

Sorry, but peeing on someones car makes you a knobbler.

Paradox, I am for ever in awe of you.

and to clear up any confusion, I was a police van