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I'll admit straight out the gate that I'm biased, I love the original Star Wars trilogy like an illegitimate film baby.
They're being released on DVD later this year and I'll buy them - Special Edition or not, it doesn't matter.
Star Wars holds a place in my heart, my childhood and my memories. The defining movies of my generation, and they'll always be that way. No amount of tinkering or rejigging by Lucas can change that.
Why?
Because Star Wars was the first film I ever saw. And the first time I'd ever been to the cinema.
I was 4 yrs old, Saturday morning and my dad took me to the cinema to introduce me to films. This was when The Odeon in Harlow was a gigantic, single screen place with an upper balcony, the left-hand side reserved for smokers and a woman would come down after the adverts with her little tray and you could buy Ki-Ora and Cornettos before the film started.
They played a cartoon first, I had my drink and settled back.
The curtains drew back and everything went dark.
Then *that* music started and the opening crawl came up (dad read it to me in case I missed any).
Then a rumble started from the back of the cinema, I remember turning round and looking to see what it was.
And then that Star Destroyer hoved into view. It just slowly appeared and kept appearing for what seemed like an age. I'd never ever seen anything like it before. Then the corridor and the rebels running down, the silent anticipation of what was to come.
I was glued to my seat, saucer eyed and slack-jawed.
The door blows in and Stormtroopers come out, then from the smoke? The greatest screen villain in my history:
Darth Vader. Strolling out from the smoke, dressed in black, breathing strangely and strangling a rebel. Terrified me beyond words.
You can't imagine the effect that film had on a 4yr old Goatboy. No experience like it ever before, nothing to compare it to, a vocabulary too small to explain. I made my dad take me back 5 times to watch it, and I had all the toys. I loved that world completely.
I wanted to be Luke Skywalker - the innocent naive kid that wanted to be a Star Pilot at the Academy, wanted to have adventures and see things. We all wanted that. We wanted Chewbacca as a friend, droids as cool toys and we wanted Landspeeders, lightsabers and The Death Star.
It unlocked my imagination and gave birth to a love of movies in me.
You had the classic villain, Darth Vader. You had the shining good guy Luke Skywalker, you had the Princess, the nice old man Ben Kenobi etc.
This was a world we'd never even thought could exist before.
And then 4 years later came The Empire Strikes Back.
You better believe me and my mates were at the front of the queue.
We were 8 now, and much more adult and grown up. We'd all seen Star Wars dozens of times between us (this was before the birth of VHS remember, you couldn't see them anywhere else *but* the cinema) and we knew the story.
We settled back, almost bursting with excitement and we were taken to that world again.
Hoth? Snow? Luke attacked by a Yeti and left for dead? NO WAY! But here comes Han Solo and Chewie, just as we remembered them to save him.
His mates came looking for him, they'd never let their friend die. We understood that and would do the same, we swore to each other.
AT-AT Walkers? Yoda? Ben Kenobi back? This was so much more than we ever hoped.
And then *that* moment. The greatest twist and so unexpected. We had no idea it was coming and there was just no way it could be.
"I am your Father"
????????Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's dad????????
Han Solo frozen and taken away by Boba Fett????????
Luke with a robot hand??????
And Empire ends.
We had to wait another 4 years to find out what was happening.
12 years old. The final chapter.
Jabba The Hut, Leia is Luke's sister? Speederbike chases, Ewoks (meh), Yoda dies? Han & Leia get it together? The Emperor dead, Vader's face revealed, reconciliation between father & son. The whole gang back together, The Empire defeated, the universe is calm and safe.
Faultless.
Movies that we had began to watch aged 4. Characters we grew up with and wanted to be so badly. Dialogue we knew and quoted in the playground.
Han Solo, Stormtroopers, Jabba, The Cantina, Greedo, the trash-compactor, the Death Star finale, the trench-run, AT-AT walkers, Millenium Falcon, X-Wings, Darth Vader, Han Solo in carbonite, "I love you" "I know", Speederbikes.
All these things have become cinema iconography and etched in the memory of those that saw them at the cinema as kids, formative cinema years and introductions to movies and sci-fi.
Absolutely incomparable to anything else since, Star Wars led the way for summer blockbusters and invented the whole genre.
And then 22 years later after Star Wars came out, Lucas announces he's making another 3.
Millions of 25-30yr olds instantly arc streams of fanboy silk-love into the ether.
We see stills, hear snippets, watch the music video, see the toys appearing, see the posters months in advance. We hear rumours:
Obi-Wan is back, Yoda is there, the Droids.
This will be the coolest thing since I was 4 years old.
The Phantom Menace.
THAT music blares, the opening crawl. Idiot grin on my face, I'm 4 again. I'm right back there seeing it for the first time.
The ship flies over again...I'm ready for this after 22 years of waiting, I want this to be good.
...ummm.....
This sounds like Star Wars, it looks like Star Wars. But it's not Star Wars, something's wrong.
Where's the banter between characters?
Where's the loveable rogue?
Where's the innocent, lusting for excitement everyday kid?
Where's the villain?
Where's the stormtroopers?
Where are the set pieces?
Where is the memorable dialogue?
I see earnest cheesy "But Master" "No, you are young" from what are supposed to be Jedi Knights. Where's the "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper"? Where's "Ah that conversation was getting boring anyway"? Where's "I don't care what you smell, get down there you big furball?"
There's no snappy wit, there's no jokes, there's no cynicism.
There's some crap about trade blockades, some pasty faced man-voiced Queen saying "I will nard give in do them Vice Chansellorrrr"
There's some annoying little kid that shouts "Wizards!" in a space battle.
There's no C3P0 and R2D2 banter, there's nothing in the dialogue.
There's no villain here. I saw Darth Maul in the trailer, I want Darth Maul. I want to feel like these guys are in danger, mortal danger from The Empire. Eh? There's no Empire????? What the fu-
No Stormtroopers? Just these tossy battle-droids that say "Roger Roger"?
Jar-Jar? A comedy character? What is this?
No wait, here's Darth Maul. Now it's gonna get good!...oh, he's dead.
And Schindler-Gon Jin is dead. Except he's not, it's exactly what happened to Obi-Wan in Star Wars.
Maaaan, this sucks. I don't care about some little 7yr old.
There's nobody here to identify with. Adults had Han Solo, the cocky space pirate who mocked everything. Kids had Luke who wanted adventure. Little girls had Princess Leia.
What's here? A little moppet, Renton-Kenobi and Leon's assassin helper in Pirot the Clown make-up sounding like a transexual?
This is awful.
Attack of The Clones.
I can't even go into the bowel-loosingly shiteness of that film.
"I'm Boba Fett, well reknowned Bounty Hunter. Here, another bounty hunter, kill Amidala for me whilst I do nothing."
"I'm Darth Vader. Why can't I touch her boobs master? Wah wah wah, this is so unfair, I like, hate you and stuff"
"I'm Saruman, see me fight Yoda in the one good scene even remotely echoing the first 3 movies"
These new movies blow. They're not Star Wars.
"Oh well Lucas meant for it to be in this order"
Really? Wrong.
If I have kids, they'll see Episode 4 first, as it was originally.
Why?
Because otherwise what do you have?
You reach Episode 3 and you know the entire backstory.
Star Wars Episode 4 starts and you think "There's Luke Skywalker, son of Annakin who was good once but fell to the Dark Side and is now Darth Vader under command of The Emperor"
Obi-Wan talks to Luke about his father and hands him his lightsabre and you think "I know all this already, his dad is Darth Vader, get on with it"
Empire holds no revelations.
"Search your feelings Luke, you know it to be true"
"No"
"I am your father"
"Never!"
Audience "Well done Luke, we knew this 4 movies ago you spaz"
And what really annoys me?
I'll go watch Episode 3 and I'll buy them all on DVD because the first 3 hold such powerful memories for me.
Damn you Lucas.
They're being released on DVD later this year and I'll buy them - Special Edition or not, it doesn't matter.
Star Wars holds a place in my heart, my childhood and my memories. The defining movies of my generation, and they'll always be that way. No amount of tinkering or rejigging by Lucas can change that.
Why?
Because Star Wars was the first film I ever saw. And the first time I'd ever been to the cinema.
I was 4 yrs old, Saturday morning and my dad took me to the cinema to introduce me to films. This was when The Odeon in Harlow was a gigantic, single screen place with an upper balcony, the left-hand side reserved for smokers and a woman would come down after the adverts with her little tray and you could buy Ki-Ora and Cornettos before the film started.
They played a cartoon first, I had my drink and settled back.
The curtains drew back and everything went dark.
Then *that* music started and the opening crawl came up (dad read it to me in case I missed any).
Then a rumble started from the back of the cinema, I remember turning round and looking to see what it was.
And then that Star Destroyer hoved into view. It just slowly appeared and kept appearing for what seemed like an age. I'd never ever seen anything like it before. Then the corridor and the rebels running down, the silent anticipation of what was to come.
I was glued to my seat, saucer eyed and slack-jawed.
The door blows in and Stormtroopers come out, then from the smoke? The greatest screen villain in my history:
Darth Vader. Strolling out from the smoke, dressed in black, breathing strangely and strangling a rebel. Terrified me beyond words.
You can't imagine the effect that film had on a 4yr old Goatboy. No experience like it ever before, nothing to compare it to, a vocabulary too small to explain. I made my dad take me back 5 times to watch it, and I had all the toys. I loved that world completely.
I wanted to be Luke Skywalker - the innocent naive kid that wanted to be a Star Pilot at the Academy, wanted to have adventures and see things. We all wanted that. We wanted Chewbacca as a friend, droids as cool toys and we wanted Landspeeders, lightsabers and The Death Star.
It unlocked my imagination and gave birth to a love of movies in me.
You had the classic villain, Darth Vader. You had the shining good guy Luke Skywalker, you had the Princess, the nice old man Ben Kenobi etc.
This was a world we'd never even thought could exist before.
And then 4 years later came The Empire Strikes Back.
You better believe me and my mates were at the front of the queue.
We were 8 now, and much more adult and grown up. We'd all seen Star Wars dozens of times between us (this was before the birth of VHS remember, you couldn't see them anywhere else *but* the cinema) and we knew the story.
We settled back, almost bursting with excitement and we were taken to that world again.
Hoth? Snow? Luke attacked by a Yeti and left for dead? NO WAY! But here comes Han Solo and Chewie, just as we remembered them to save him.
His mates came looking for him, they'd never let their friend die. We understood that and would do the same, we swore to each other.
AT-AT Walkers? Yoda? Ben Kenobi back? This was so much more than we ever hoped.
And then *that* moment. The greatest twist and so unexpected. We had no idea it was coming and there was just no way it could be.
"I am your Father"
????????Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's dad????????
Han Solo frozen and taken away by Boba Fett????????
Luke with a robot hand??????
And Empire ends.
We had to wait another 4 years to find out what was happening.
12 years old. The final chapter.
Jabba The Hut, Leia is Luke's sister? Speederbike chases, Ewoks (meh), Yoda dies? Han & Leia get it together? The Emperor dead, Vader's face revealed, reconciliation between father & son. The whole gang back together, The Empire defeated, the universe is calm and safe.
Faultless.
Movies that we had began to watch aged 4. Characters we grew up with and wanted to be so badly. Dialogue we knew and quoted in the playground.
Han Solo, Stormtroopers, Jabba, The Cantina, Greedo, the trash-compactor, the Death Star finale, the trench-run, AT-AT walkers, Millenium Falcon, X-Wings, Darth Vader, Han Solo in carbonite, "I love you" "I know", Speederbikes.
All these things have become cinema iconography and etched in the memory of those that saw them at the cinema as kids, formative cinema years and introductions to movies and sci-fi.
Absolutely incomparable to anything else since, Star Wars led the way for summer blockbusters and invented the whole genre.
And then 22 years later after Star Wars came out, Lucas announces he's making another 3.
Millions of 25-30yr olds instantly arc streams of fanboy silk-love into the ether.
We see stills, hear snippets, watch the music video, see the toys appearing, see the posters months in advance. We hear rumours:
Obi-Wan is back, Yoda is there, the Droids.
This will be the coolest thing since I was 4 years old.
The Phantom Menace.
THAT music blares, the opening crawl. Idiot grin on my face, I'm 4 again. I'm right back there seeing it for the first time.
The ship flies over again...I'm ready for this after 22 years of waiting, I want this to be good.
...ummm.....
This sounds like Star Wars, it looks like Star Wars. But it's not Star Wars, something's wrong.
Where's the banter between characters?
Where's the loveable rogue?
Where's the innocent, lusting for excitement everyday kid?
Where's the villain?
Where's the stormtroopers?
Where are the set pieces?
Where is the memorable dialogue?
I see earnest cheesy "But Master" "No, you are young" from what are supposed to be Jedi Knights. Where's the "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper"? Where's "Ah that conversation was getting boring anyway"? Where's "I don't care what you smell, get down there you big furball?"
There's no snappy wit, there's no jokes, there's no cynicism.
There's some crap about trade blockades, some pasty faced man-voiced Queen saying "I will nard give in do them Vice Chansellorrrr"
There's some annoying little kid that shouts "Wizards!" in a space battle.
There's no C3P0 and R2D2 banter, there's nothing in the dialogue.
There's no villain here. I saw Darth Maul in the trailer, I want Darth Maul. I want to feel like these guys are in danger, mortal danger from The Empire. Eh? There's no Empire????? What the fu-
No Stormtroopers? Just these tossy battle-droids that say "Roger Roger"?
Jar-Jar? A comedy character? What is this?
No wait, here's Darth Maul. Now it's gonna get good!...oh, he's dead.
And Schindler-Gon Jin is dead. Except he's not, it's exactly what happened to Obi-Wan in Star Wars.
Maaaan, this sucks. I don't care about some little 7yr old.
There's nobody here to identify with. Adults had Han Solo, the cocky space pirate who mocked everything. Kids had Luke who wanted adventure. Little girls had Princess Leia.
What's here? A little moppet, Renton-Kenobi and Leon's assassin helper in Pirot the Clown make-up sounding like a transexual?
This is awful.
Attack of The Clones.
I can't even go into the bowel-loosingly shiteness of that film.
"I'm Boba Fett, well reknowned Bounty Hunter. Here, another bounty hunter, kill Amidala for me whilst I do nothing."
"I'm Darth Vader. Why can't I touch her boobs master? Wah wah wah, this is so unfair, I like, hate you and stuff"
"I'm Saruman, see me fight Yoda in the one good scene even remotely echoing the first 3 movies"
These new movies blow. They're not Star Wars.
"Oh well Lucas meant for it to be in this order"
Really? Wrong.
If I have kids, they'll see Episode 4 first, as it was originally.
Why?
Because otherwise what do you have?
You reach Episode 3 and you know the entire backstory.
Star Wars Episode 4 starts and you think "There's Luke Skywalker, son of Annakin who was good once but fell to the Dark Side and is now Darth Vader under command of The Emperor"
Obi-Wan talks to Luke about his father and hands him his lightsabre and you think "I know all this already, his dad is Darth Vader, get on with it"
Empire holds no revelations.
"Search your feelings Luke, you know it to be true"
"No"
"I am your father"
"Never!"
Audience "Well done Luke, we knew this 4 movies ago you spaz"
And what really annoys me?
I'll go watch Episode 3 and I'll buy them all on DVD because the first 3 hold such powerful memories for me.
Damn you Lucas.
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hey, that's me!! ;)
good point. good point.
nothing to add to that really.
I bet he has glasses like jam jars, rickets from vitamin D deficiency, and an unhealthy fixation on Queen Amidala.
nothing to add to that really.
I bet he has glasses like jam jars, rickets from vitamin D deficiency, and an unhealthy fixation on Queen Amidala.
ßora† SagdiyeV wrote:
> what a goddamn show off, and what must his new bird think of him
> sticking pictures of his previous girlfriends on the site?
I don't believe for a moment that she's his bird. How much time must he spend maintaining that site?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
> what a goddamn show off, and what must his new bird think of him
> sticking pictures of his previous girlfriends on the site?
I don't believe for a moment that she's his bird. How much time must he spend maintaining that site?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
what a goddamn show off, and what must his new bird think of him sticking pictures of his previous girlfriends on the site?
or his earlier girlfriends.
you could have a top trumps game with the characters and midichlorian ratings! nah
his girlfriend isn't bad though.
his girlfriend isn't bad though.
monkey_man wrote:
> and he has a "midichlorian
> listing" for all the characters.
(*snort*)
Now THATS a Geek.
:) :) :)
> and he has a "midichlorian
> listing" for all the characters.
(*snort*)
Now THATS a Geek.
:) :) :)
hey, that's geeks for you. It's a good site though if you like star wars.
Having read it I look forward to ep 3 even more. We'll see though, it might be totally different.
Having read it I look forward to ep 3 even more. We'll see though, it might be totally different.
Well, it is quite similar to the story I had - how Anakin dies is exactly the same. The guy is a tool though - he claims to be a close personal friend of Lucas', and he has a "midichlorian listing" for all the characters.
well, is it fake or not in your opinion?
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