The "General Games Chat" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
"There's not enough room in this forum for the two of us." FM slammed his emptied whisky glass down on the wooden counter. "Step outside, Grix......"
Grix eyed FM carefully. They'd known each other for a long time, but things had been gettin' a little strained lately."
"What's this about, FM," he demanded, making his way through the packed but hushed saloon and pushing the swinging doors outwards as he stepped onto the dusty ground outside.
"Well," replied FM, pushing open the doors again and following Grix outside into the hot, dry air, "You've bushwhacked one of my topics just one time too many. It's time we had this out. Mano a Mano. Poster to Poster."
Grix paused in his stride to think of a witty retort about FM's last comment, then decided that now was probably not the time.
"So, what's it to be? 10 paces, turn and fire?" asked Grix, making sure his gunbelt was fastened properly.
"You know me better than that, Grix. 30 paces." FM checked his gunbelt. The Smith and Wesson 6-shot revolver hung loosely at his right hip.
They stood back to back under the glare of the midday sun, and started to count.....
1....2....3....
The occupants of the saloon were packing the windows trying to get a glimpse of the showdown outside. This was unheard of. The last shootout in the town of Last Chance Reserve had been quite a time ago, when the Er-no posse had cleaned out the Desperate Dans, but this was different. Two equally matched opponents were about to face off.
Insane Bartender was going even more nuts behind the saloon's counter because he was losing good sales whilst all this was going on.
Outside, the count was at 25.... as FM glanced to his right and saw PB on the roof of the Red Splat Hotel and Boarding House, shotgun at hand. PB nodded with a knowing look. FM nodded back.
The count was 26.... as Grix looked across to the SR Saddlery, where he spied Sniper with his trusty Winchester Rifle. Grix gave a brief nod. Sniper returned it.
27....28...29..
Dust whirled up as both men spun to face each other. The blast of PB's shotgun firing both barrels broke the deafening silence that preceeded it, and a cloud of sand flew up at Grix's feet as the buckshot ploughed into the ground.
Grix drew his gun and took aim, FM was still drawing his because he was left handed and his belt was on the wrong way, Sniper fired his rifle, and there was a sharp report, then a clatter as PB dropped his shotgun and swandived off the roof of the hotel and landed in a horse trough.
FM grappled with his pistol, it had snagged in the holster, and he reminded himself to be more careful where he left his chewing gum.
Grix took pity. (No he didn't). Grix fired his gun. Fortunately, FM and done his research and Grix's eyesight wasn't as good as it should have been, and at 30 paces it was like trying to read a Wanted Poster through a mirage. Grix's first bullet flew out of town faster than a newbie Gameaday winner. He wasn't sure if he had hit FM or not, but then he heard FM pull back the hammer of his Smith and Wesson with a
*click*
Grix eyed FM carefully. They'd known each other for a long time, but things had been gettin' a little strained lately."
"What's this about, FM," he demanded, making his way through the packed but hushed saloon and pushing the swinging doors outwards as he stepped onto the dusty ground outside.
"Well," replied FM, pushing open the doors again and following Grix outside into the hot, dry air, "You've bushwhacked one of my topics just one time too many. It's time we had this out. Mano a Mano. Poster to Poster."
Grix paused in his stride to think of a witty retort about FM's last comment, then decided that now was probably not the time.
"So, what's it to be? 10 paces, turn and fire?" asked Grix, making sure his gunbelt was fastened properly.
"You know me better than that, Grix. 30 paces." FM checked his gunbelt. The Smith and Wesson 6-shot revolver hung loosely at his right hip.
They stood back to back under the glare of the midday sun, and started to count.....
1....2....3....
The occupants of the saloon were packing the windows trying to get a glimpse of the showdown outside. This was unheard of. The last shootout in the town of Last Chance Reserve had been quite a time ago, when the Er-no posse had cleaned out the Desperate Dans, but this was different. Two equally matched opponents were about to face off.
Insane Bartender was going even more nuts behind the saloon's counter because he was losing good sales whilst all this was going on.
Outside, the count was at 25.... as FM glanced to his right and saw PB on the roof of the Red Splat Hotel and Boarding House, shotgun at hand. PB nodded with a knowing look. FM nodded back.
The count was 26.... as Grix looked across to the SR Saddlery, where he spied Sniper with his trusty Winchester Rifle. Grix gave a brief nod. Sniper returned it.
27....28...29..
Dust whirled up as both men spun to face each other. The blast of PB's shotgun firing both barrels broke the deafening silence that preceeded it, and a cloud of sand flew up at Grix's feet as the buckshot ploughed into the ground.
Grix drew his gun and took aim, FM was still drawing his because he was left handed and his belt was on the wrong way, Sniper fired his rifle, and there was a sharp report, then a clatter as PB dropped his shotgun and swandived off the roof of the hotel and landed in a horse trough.
FM grappled with his pistol, it had snagged in the holster, and he reminded himself to be more careful where he left his chewing gum.
Grix took pity. (No he didn't). Grix fired his gun. Fortunately, FM and done his research and Grix's eyesight wasn't as good as it should have been, and at 30 paces it was like trying to read a Wanted Poster through a mirage. Grix's first bullet flew out of town faster than a newbie Gameaday winner. He wasn't sure if he had hit FM or not, but then he heard FM pull back the hammer of his Smith and Wesson with a
*click*
Page:
Grix took pity. (No he didn't). Grix fired his gun. Fortunately, FM and done his research and Grix's eyesight wasn't as good as it should have been, and at 30 paces it was like trying to read a Wanted Poster through a mirage. Grix's first bullet flew out of town faster than a newbie Gameaday winner. He wasn't sure if he had hit FM or not, but then he heard FM pull back the hammer of his Smith and Wesson with a
*click*
and then all was quiet. Grix slammed his fist down onto the return key on his computer, time instantly slowed, and he could see the bullet start to whizz towards him leaving a vortex trail of disrupted air molecules in its wake.
Grix leaned backwards as the bullet approached, contorting his spine as he did so, his back parallel to the ground and his arms waving for balance as the bullet passed over his chest an onwards into the distance.
He heard the Smith and Wesson fire again and again, and saw more bullets flying towards him this time. He'd had enough. He stood up and placed his hand out in a 'Stop' signal, and the bullets stopped in midair in front of him.
He picked one out of the air and examined it.
(Who do you think you are, Neo?)
"Shut up."
(You'll be following a white rabbit next you know)
"Don't be silly, this is our story, not the Matrix"
Grix let the bullet drop to the ground with a
*click*
*click*
and then all was quiet. Grix slammed his fist down onto the return key on his computer, time instantly slowed, and he could see the bullet start to whizz towards him leaving a vortex trail of disrupted air molecules in its wake.
Grix leaned backwards as the bullet approached, contorting his spine as he did so, his back parallel to the ground and his arms waving for balance as the bullet passed over his chest an onwards into the distance.
He heard the Smith and Wesson fire again and again, and saw more bullets flying towards him this time. He'd had enough. He stood up and placed his hand out in a 'Stop' signal, and the bullets stopped in midair in front of him.
He picked one out of the air and examined it.
(Who do you think you are, Neo?)
"Shut up."
(You'll be following a white rabbit next you know)
"Don't be silly, this is our story, not the Matrix"
Grix let the bullet drop to the ground with a
*click*
I think there should be a joint Gameaday for all the writers involved!
(will never happen..)
(will never happen..)
"There's not enough room in this forum for the two of us." FM slammed his emptied whisky glass down on the wooden counter. "Step outside, Grix......"
Grix eyed FM carefully. They'd known each other for a long time, but things had been gettin' a little strained lately."
"What's this about, FM," he demanded, making his way through the packed but hushed saloon and pushing the swinging doors outwards as he stepped onto the dusty ground outside.
"Well," replied FM, pushing open the doors again and following Grix outside into the hot, dry air, "You've bushwhacked one of my topics just one time too many. It's time we had this out. Mano a Mano. Poster to Poster."
Grix paused in his stride to think of a witty retort about FM's last comment, then decided that now was probably not the time.
"So, what's it to be? 10 paces, turn and fire?" asked Grix, making sure his gunbelt was fastened properly.
"You know me better than that, Grix. 30 paces." FM checked his gunbelt. The Smith and Wesson 6-shot revolver hung loosely at his right hip.
They stood back to back under the glare of the midday sun, and started to count.....
1....2....3....
The occupants of the saloon were packing the windows trying to get a glimpse of the showdown outside. This was unheard of. The last shootout in the town of Last Chance Reserve had been quite a time ago, when the Er-no posse had cleaned out the Desperate Dans, but this was different. Two equally matched opponents were about to face off.
Insane Bartender was going even more nuts behind the saloon's counter because he was losing good sales whilst all this was going on.
Outside, the count was at 25.... as FM glanced to his right and saw PB on the roof of the Red Splat Hotel and Boarding House, shotgun at hand. PB nodded with a knowing look. FM nodded back.
The count was 26.... as Grix looked across to the SR Saddlery, where he spied Sniper with his trusty Winchester Rifle. Grix gave a brief nod. Sniper returned it.
27....28...29..
"Wait!" said Grix. He shook his head to get it cleared.
"This is where it started. If we can change history, then I might be able to regain control."
"Here!" said Pb, and threw Grix the handheld computer. "Use this, it might help you to regain control of the events. It's set up to monitor your brain waves and should allow you to tap in to the cartridge's power."
Grix caught the machine and opened it up. The town was silent as they all watched Grix concentrate on the readings.
"I think..." started Grix. "...this should do it...."
Grix eyed FM carefully. They'd known each other for a long time, but things had been gettin' a little strained lately."
"What's this about, FM," he demanded, making his way through the packed but hushed saloon and pushing the swinging doors outwards as he stepped onto the dusty ground outside.
"Well," replied FM, pushing open the doors again and following Grix outside into the hot, dry air, "You've bushwhacked one of my topics just one time too many. It's time we had this out. Mano a Mano. Poster to Poster."
Grix paused in his stride to think of a witty retort about FM's last comment, then decided that now was probably not the time.
"So, what's it to be? 10 paces, turn and fire?" asked Grix, making sure his gunbelt was fastened properly.
"You know me better than that, Grix. 30 paces." FM checked his gunbelt. The Smith and Wesson 6-shot revolver hung loosely at his right hip.
They stood back to back under the glare of the midday sun, and started to count.....
1....2....3....
The occupants of the saloon were packing the windows trying to get a glimpse of the showdown outside. This was unheard of. The last shootout in the town of Last Chance Reserve had been quite a time ago, when the Er-no posse had cleaned out the Desperate Dans, but this was different. Two equally matched opponents were about to face off.
Insane Bartender was going even more nuts behind the saloon's counter because he was losing good sales whilst all this was going on.
Outside, the count was at 25.... as FM glanced to his right and saw PB on the roof of the Red Splat Hotel and Boarding House, shotgun at hand. PB nodded with a knowing look. FM nodded back.
The count was 26.... as Grix looked across to the SR Saddlery, where he spied Sniper with his trusty Winchester Rifle. Grix gave a brief nod. Sniper returned it.
27....28...29..
"Wait!" said Grix. He shook his head to get it cleared.
"This is where it started. If we can change history, then I might be able to regain control."
"Here!" said Pb, and threw Grix the handheld computer. "Use this, it might help you to regain control of the events. It's set up to monitor your brain waves and should allow you to tap in to the cartridge's power."
Grix caught the machine and opened it up. The town was silent as they all watched Grix concentrate on the readings.
"I think..." started Grix. "...this should do it...."
Cliff Richard stood apon a hill of sand... he watched in the rain over the town.
The mud had washed away now. It was time.
He whistled. The shadows ran up to join him... and they all began to run down the hill, towards the town.
They ran through the town square, and into the bar.
Cliff got up on stage, and the rest got out themselves ready.
They began to play Apache...
Grix slammed open the swing doors of the bar.
The shadows stopped playing. Everybody turned to look at Grix.
Cliff turned to the shadows and smiled.
"Good job everyone!"
Cliff and the shadows walked out of the bar.
Everybody looked away, and went back to their business.
FantasyMeister, Venombyte... all of them, they were playing cards.
Grix went to sit down next to them. He sat and waited for the next deal. Grix's brain nodded to Grix. The end was nigh.
The mud had washed away now. It was time.
He whistled. The shadows ran up to join him... and they all began to run down the hill, towards the town.
They ran through the town square, and into the bar.
Cliff got up on stage, and the rest got out themselves ready.
They began to play Apache...
Grix slammed open the swing doors of the bar.
The shadows stopped playing. Everybody turned to look at Grix.
Cliff turned to the shadows and smiled.
"Good job everyone!"
Cliff and the shadows walked out of the bar.
Everybody looked away, and went back to their business.
FantasyMeister, Venombyte... all of them, they were playing cards.
Grix went to sit down next to them. He sat and waited for the next deal. Grix's brain nodded to Grix. The end was nigh.
Grix and Venombyte walked through the jungle again, following where the missile had went.
Venombyte had spotted a cliff in the distance, and they agreed that it would be a good idea to walk along it, so they would have shelter when they rested, and they wouldn't be going around in circles.
Beating back the wild plants with big sticks, they journeyed onwards...
Grix noticed something.
Some kind of statue.
Venombyte walked up to it... there was blood on it. And it was fresh.
"Humm."
"What do you think it is?"
Venombyte looked around, letting time pass slowly, for dramatic effect.
"A warning."
----------------------------
The tank rumbled onwards towards the village.
"Go over a hut. Go on. It'll be funny."
The second Grix steered the tank towards a hut... and the tank drove straight over it, flattening the walls, and whatever was inside.
"Ha."
The tank rumbled off into the distance.
-----------------------------
Grix and Venombyte had found a cave.
Walking slowly up the entrance... Grix found the cave to be too dark.
He ripped off his sleeve, and wrapped it around the stick he was carrying. He got out his lighter and tried to light the cloth... but the cloth wouldn't light.
"Damn."
Grix took apart the lighter. He sprinkled the liquid all over the shirt, and with the very last drops in the lighter, managed to light the cloth.
Venombyte turned on his torch, and they both walked off down the cave.
After a while, Grix and Venombyte came across a hole in the roof of the cave, and the light shone in, almost blinding them...
Venombyte was about to walk through the light, when Grix grabbed him, and stopped him.
Grix leant under the light... and waved his hand in the air... he felt his arm come in contact with a small piece of string...
Five spikes jumped out of the wall, and missed Grix by an inch.
The both crawled under the spikes, as they began to pull themselves back into the wall...
Grix and Venombyte looked down the deep pit which prevented them from going any further. The pit seemed to go on forever... completely black...
Venombyte thought to himself, and then opened his bag and got something out.
A long black leather whip. With metal chains wrapped around the handle.
Grix looked at Venombyte.
"What?"
Venombyte whipped a wooden support above the hole, and jumped across. He swung it back to Grix, who swung across to join Venombyte.
The tunnel then continued on... Grix began to notice how round the tunnel was. Like it was built for a specific thing to get through... but Grix couldn't think of what.
And there it was... the treasure of the cave...
A long curved sword lay across a rock slab on the other end of the stone room. Small patches of cloth lay on the floor...
Grix crouched to his knees, and pressed the cloth down with his wooden torch...
A arrow shot from the left hand side of the room, and landed in the wooden torch.
"You go get the sword." Grix said to Venombyte.
Venombyte said nothing, and just stared at Grix.
Grix jumped between the gaps... trying to avoid the cloth patches...
He slowly walked up the side of the wall, and jumped the stairs...
He landed, and begun to lose his balance...
Venombyte watched as Grix nearly managed to kill himself... he sighed. Grix had regained his balance.
Grix stood in front of the stone slab... and looked at the sword apon it.
Grix blew out the torch.
Grix threw his torch from his left to his right hand...
He teared some cloth away from the stick, and wrapped it around the other end. He broke a tiny piece of wood off the end... to try and get the same length...
Grix threw his shoulders back, and slowly moved his right hand to pick up the sword... with the left hand slowly bringing in the stick...
Venombyte raised his hands to his mouth...
Grix swapped the sword and the stick.
Nothing happened.
He did it!
Grix put his elbow on the slab, and wiped the sweat from his forehead.
"Hey! Venombyte!" Grix shouted... Venombyte widened his eyes... "I did it!"
Venombyte began to run away.
Grix turned around... the room was beginning to collapse...
Grix jumped his way down the stairs, and managed to step on every single cloth mat... arrows shot from all directions, and he dived into the tunnel...
The wall behind the stone slab broke open, and a giant boulder fell through, and rolled straight behind Grix.
Grix ran as fast as he could... clutching the sword in one hand, and holding his side with his other... he had a stitch, and it really wasn't the best of times.
Grix over took Venombyte, and ran away from the heavy rumbling from the boulder...
Grix jumped for the whip still hanging from the branch, and swung across... he dropped the sword, and it clattered to the ground.
Grix looked back for the sword, and the branch moved slightly, and Grix fell to the other side... The whip came loose, and Grix slammed into the wall.
Venombyte stopped at the other side.
"GRIX!" The rumbling was getting louder. "THROW ME THE WHIP!"
"Throw me the sword, and I'll throw you the whip!"
Grix thought for a second.
"NO! DON'T THROW ME THE SWORD!"
"THROW ME THE WHIP!!!!"
Grix rolled the black whip up, and threw it across.
Well. He TRIED to throw it across. Grix had a girls throw.
The whip missed the other side by a metre, and Venombyte threw himself forward to catch it... and threw himself down the hole... "Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
The rumbling got louder.
Grix shrugged to himself.
He jumped in the hole too.
Venombyte had spotted a cliff in the distance, and they agreed that it would be a good idea to walk along it, so they would have shelter when they rested, and they wouldn't be going around in circles.
Beating back the wild plants with big sticks, they journeyed onwards...
Grix noticed something.
Some kind of statue.
Venombyte walked up to it... there was blood on it. And it was fresh.
"Humm."
"What do you think it is?"
Venombyte looked around, letting time pass slowly, for dramatic effect.
"A warning."
----------------------------
The tank rumbled onwards towards the village.
"Go over a hut. Go on. It'll be funny."
The second Grix steered the tank towards a hut... and the tank drove straight over it, flattening the walls, and whatever was inside.
"Ha."
The tank rumbled off into the distance.
-----------------------------
Grix and Venombyte had found a cave.
Walking slowly up the entrance... Grix found the cave to be too dark.
He ripped off his sleeve, and wrapped it around the stick he was carrying. He got out his lighter and tried to light the cloth... but the cloth wouldn't light.
"Damn."
Grix took apart the lighter. He sprinkled the liquid all over the shirt, and with the very last drops in the lighter, managed to light the cloth.
Venombyte turned on his torch, and they both walked off down the cave.
After a while, Grix and Venombyte came across a hole in the roof of the cave, and the light shone in, almost blinding them...
Venombyte was about to walk through the light, when Grix grabbed him, and stopped him.
Grix leant under the light... and waved his hand in the air... he felt his arm come in contact with a small piece of string...
Five spikes jumped out of the wall, and missed Grix by an inch.
The both crawled under the spikes, as they began to pull themselves back into the wall...
Grix and Venombyte looked down the deep pit which prevented them from going any further. The pit seemed to go on forever... completely black...
Venombyte thought to himself, and then opened his bag and got something out.
A long black leather whip. With metal chains wrapped around the handle.
Grix looked at Venombyte.
"What?"
Venombyte whipped a wooden support above the hole, and jumped across. He swung it back to Grix, who swung across to join Venombyte.
The tunnel then continued on... Grix began to notice how round the tunnel was. Like it was built for a specific thing to get through... but Grix couldn't think of what.
And there it was... the treasure of the cave...
A long curved sword lay across a rock slab on the other end of the stone room. Small patches of cloth lay on the floor...
Grix crouched to his knees, and pressed the cloth down with his wooden torch...
A arrow shot from the left hand side of the room, and landed in the wooden torch.
"You go get the sword." Grix said to Venombyte.
Venombyte said nothing, and just stared at Grix.
Grix jumped between the gaps... trying to avoid the cloth patches...
He slowly walked up the side of the wall, and jumped the stairs...
He landed, and begun to lose his balance...
Venombyte watched as Grix nearly managed to kill himself... he sighed. Grix had regained his balance.
Grix stood in front of the stone slab... and looked at the sword apon it.
Grix blew out the torch.
Grix threw his torch from his left to his right hand...
He teared some cloth away from the stick, and wrapped it around the other end. He broke a tiny piece of wood off the end... to try and get the same length...
Grix threw his shoulders back, and slowly moved his right hand to pick up the sword... with the left hand slowly bringing in the stick...
Venombyte raised his hands to his mouth...
Grix swapped the sword and the stick.
Nothing happened.
He did it!
Grix put his elbow on the slab, and wiped the sweat from his forehead.
"Hey! Venombyte!" Grix shouted... Venombyte widened his eyes... "I did it!"
Venombyte began to run away.
Grix turned around... the room was beginning to collapse...
Grix jumped his way down the stairs, and managed to step on every single cloth mat... arrows shot from all directions, and he dived into the tunnel...
The wall behind the stone slab broke open, and a giant boulder fell through, and rolled straight behind Grix.
Grix ran as fast as he could... clutching the sword in one hand, and holding his side with his other... he had a stitch, and it really wasn't the best of times.
Grix over took Venombyte, and ran away from the heavy rumbling from the boulder...
Grix jumped for the whip still hanging from the branch, and swung across... he dropped the sword, and it clattered to the ground.
Grix looked back for the sword, and the branch moved slightly, and Grix fell to the other side... The whip came loose, and Grix slammed into the wall.
Venombyte stopped at the other side.
"GRIX!" The rumbling was getting louder. "THROW ME THE WHIP!"
"Throw me the sword, and I'll throw you the whip!"
Grix thought for a second.
"NO! DON'T THROW ME THE SWORD!"
"THROW ME THE WHIP!!!!"
Grix rolled the black whip up, and threw it across.
Well. He TRIED to throw it across. Grix had a girls throw.
The whip missed the other side by a metre, and Venombyte threw himself forward to catch it... and threw himself down the hole... "Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
The rumbling got louder.
Grix shrugged to himself.
He jumped in the hole too.
FM leaped for joy as Newcastle scored again...
Only to be pulled down at great force... the people around him screamed as he was sucked into the ground.
He awoke to find himself being dragged by the legs by Sniper.
"Whaa?" FantasyMeister wiped the mud from his face, "What happened?"
"I asked you where we were, and then the tunnel collapsed..."
"I've already told you Sniper, I don't know. All I remember is trying to get away from something, and ending up here."
Sniper walked down the tunnel again, stepping over the pile of dirt that had buried FM. FM followed.
-----------------------
Grix's brain sat on top of the tank as if flattened the trees. Jake jogged behind.
"Shall I fire the turret?" The second Grix asked, poking his head through the tank.
Grix's brain pretended to think it over.
"Yes." He smiled.
*BOOM*
A giant missile from the tank flew across the forest, surprisingly missing every tree, and flew across the forest.
"Err... that missile seemed rather... big... didn't it?"
"What? I can't hear you."
-----------------------
Grix lit a stick in the fire, and watched it burn.
VenomByte was trying to read the stars, to work out which way to go.
"The brightest star is the North one, isn't it?"
"Yup."
VenomByte looked up again.
"Damn clouds. Can't see a thing."
*BANG*
"What the hell was that?!"
VenomByte listened... he could hear a rumbling... it was getting louder.
"DUCK!"
VenomByte and Grix dived to the ground... Grix dived into the fire, which set his clothes alight...
He rolled along the ground, trying to put out the flames, while screaming... When he suddenly felt compelled to lie still...
A massive missile flew over them, nearly bursting their eardrums, and putting Grix's fire out.
VenomByte stood up, and watched the missile go out of sight...
-----------------------------
"Ah!" Said Sniper... "I think I can see the end of the tunnel!"
Sniper ran off, and ran up the small ledge to get out of the mud pipe...
The blast catapulted FM straight back down the tunnel... he landed against a mud wall with a *splat*, and a *click* as his spine realigned itself after all those years slumped in front of a monitor.
FM dug himself out of the mud wall and exited the tunnel through a hole created by the blast.
He ran to the top of the blast mound, and looked down...
Nothing but black space... the blast had somehow dug deep enough to open some kind of portal...
-------------------
Pb and Ant rode their galloping tortoises in the black desert sand... they rode over hills, over mountains, over sand, basically.
"I can't believe the only thing that didn't mess up Grix's mind were tortoises."
"Yes... but they're GALLOPING tortoises." Pb answered.
Ant looked at the ground moving beneath them.
He looked again... actually, he couldn't tell if it was moving or not.
"Galloping... right..."
It carried on for days. They made plenty of stops, the tortoises had lettuce, which no-one was sure where from it came, and Ant and Pb had to share the sugar, much to Ant's distaste. Water, however, was unavailable. Ant had tried to steal some lettuce from a tortoise...
"How on earth..." Asked Pb, "...can the tortoise be too quick?"
Ant looked at Pb quite seriously. "Ok, you try and get some then..."
Pb and Ant carried on, lettuceless.
Then, one day...
"The town! It's the town!"
Ant got off his tortoise, and ran towards the buildings... Pb followed him.
They fell to their knees at the water trough, and dunked their heads under the water...
The lay back on the floor, laughing in disbelief that they actually made it...
*Splat*
"What the...?"
"Splat... splat splat*
"It's raining again..."
*Splat splat splat splat splat*
Pb looked at the ground... it wasn't rain, it was mud.
A dark shadow was cast over the town...
"Oh shii..."
A giant pile of mud landed over the town... almost demolishing half of it...
Pb pulled himself out of the knee high mud, and pulled Ant out.
He looked around, wondering where the hell it came from...
He looked up again.
A dot, in the sky...
It got bigger.
Bigger again.
Ant stood up and had a look...
They could just hear something now... as the dot got bigger...
It was a scream.
Pb and Ant dived behind the water trough, as Sniper plummeted into the knee-high mud with a crunch, which sent a tidal wave of mud in all directions...
Ant looked behind from the water trough, and watched Sniper sink slowly into the mud.
It started to rain.
Only to be pulled down at great force... the people around him screamed as he was sucked into the ground.
He awoke to find himself being dragged by the legs by Sniper.
"Whaa?" FantasyMeister wiped the mud from his face, "What happened?"
"I asked you where we were, and then the tunnel collapsed..."
"I've already told you Sniper, I don't know. All I remember is trying to get away from something, and ending up here."
Sniper walked down the tunnel again, stepping over the pile of dirt that had buried FM. FM followed.
-----------------------
Grix's brain sat on top of the tank as if flattened the trees. Jake jogged behind.
"Shall I fire the turret?" The second Grix asked, poking his head through the tank.
Grix's brain pretended to think it over.
"Yes." He smiled.
*BOOM*
A giant missile from the tank flew across the forest, surprisingly missing every tree, and flew across the forest.
"Err... that missile seemed rather... big... didn't it?"
"What? I can't hear you."
-----------------------
Grix lit a stick in the fire, and watched it burn.
VenomByte was trying to read the stars, to work out which way to go.
"The brightest star is the North one, isn't it?"
"Yup."
VenomByte looked up again.
"Damn clouds. Can't see a thing."
*BANG*
"What the hell was that?!"
VenomByte listened... he could hear a rumbling... it was getting louder.
"DUCK!"
VenomByte and Grix dived to the ground... Grix dived into the fire, which set his clothes alight...
He rolled along the ground, trying to put out the flames, while screaming... When he suddenly felt compelled to lie still...
A massive missile flew over them, nearly bursting their eardrums, and putting Grix's fire out.
VenomByte stood up, and watched the missile go out of sight...
-----------------------------
"Ah!" Said Sniper... "I think I can see the end of the tunnel!"
Sniper ran off, and ran up the small ledge to get out of the mud pipe...
The blast catapulted FM straight back down the tunnel... he landed against a mud wall with a *splat*, and a *click* as his spine realigned itself after all those years slumped in front of a monitor.
FM dug himself out of the mud wall and exited the tunnel through a hole created by the blast.
He ran to the top of the blast mound, and looked down...
Nothing but black space... the blast had somehow dug deep enough to open some kind of portal...
-------------------
Pb and Ant rode their galloping tortoises in the black desert sand... they rode over hills, over mountains, over sand, basically.
"I can't believe the only thing that didn't mess up Grix's mind were tortoises."
"Yes... but they're GALLOPING tortoises." Pb answered.
Ant looked at the ground moving beneath them.
He looked again... actually, he couldn't tell if it was moving or not.
"Galloping... right..."
It carried on for days. They made plenty of stops, the tortoises had lettuce, which no-one was sure where from it came, and Ant and Pb had to share the sugar, much to Ant's distaste. Water, however, was unavailable. Ant had tried to steal some lettuce from a tortoise...
"How on earth..." Asked Pb, "...can the tortoise be too quick?"
Ant looked at Pb quite seriously. "Ok, you try and get some then..."
Pb and Ant carried on, lettuceless.
Then, one day...
"The town! It's the town!"
Ant got off his tortoise, and ran towards the buildings... Pb followed him.
They fell to their knees at the water trough, and dunked their heads under the water...
The lay back on the floor, laughing in disbelief that they actually made it...
*Splat*
"What the...?"
"Splat... splat splat*
"It's raining again..."
*Splat splat splat splat splat*
Pb looked at the ground... it wasn't rain, it was mud.
A dark shadow was cast over the town...
"Oh shii..."
A giant pile of mud landed over the town... almost demolishing half of it...
Pb pulled himself out of the knee high mud, and pulled Ant out.
He looked around, wondering where the hell it came from...
He looked up again.
A dot, in the sky...
It got bigger.
Bigger again.
Ant stood up and had a look...
They could just hear something now... as the dot got bigger...
It was a scream.
Pb and Ant dived behind the water trough, as Sniper plummeted into the knee-high mud with a crunch, which sent a tidal wave of mud in all directions...
Ant looked behind from the water trough, and watched Sniper sink slowly into the mud.
It started to rain.
Ant tried to think of something he and pb could do, as they appeared to have been left out of the story.
But Ant was stuck, and was also very tired. He went to bed.
But Ant was stuck, and was also very tired. He went to bed.
The tunnel seemed to go on forever, all that they could see in front of them were the thin shafts of sunlight that protruded from the holes in the roof.
"Where are we?" asked Sniper, trudging along sullenly behind FM as he made his way cautiously forward.
"I haven't a clue, I think Grix may be dreaming again, and we're just a part of that dream."
"But? What? How?" Sniper struggled with the concept for a few seconds before deciding that action was better than thinking.
"OK, FM, you're going to slow, I want out of this tunnel, and so I'm taking the lead."
With that Sniper roughly shoved past FM, knocking him sideways as he did so. FM reached out to brace himself against the side of the tunnel, but only felt thin air, and then lost his footing as he plummeted downwards through an inky blackness.
Sniper strode onwards oblivious to his companion's fate, his paces becoming quicker as he moved stealithy yet quickly onwards through the tunnel.
"GRIXXXXXX!!!!111232334555" FM yelled with irate newbie netspeak as he decended at an ever increasing velocity towards, well, towards whereever he was going. "WAKE UP!!! WAKE UP BEFORE I HIT SOMETHING!!!"
There was an ever so slight change in the air around him, something had shifted in the atmosphere, and FM sensed that he was somehow safe. He wasn't sure how he knew this, but he felt somehow protected, even though his velocity had not decreased.
----
Sniper marched on, seeing no end to the tunnel down which he traversed. As he past one particular shaft of light, he noticed how it glinted off a line that seemed to be carved in the tunnel wall. He paused to run his hand over the line, and then followed it up and over his head and down the other side of the tunnel, where it continued onwards like this down the rest of the tunnel.
"Hmm...." Sniper thought, unusually, "This feels like the rifling of a .306 Lee Enfield barrel. Then he heard a sound.
"Hmm...." Sniper thought, again unusually, "That sounds like the click of a .306 Lee Enfield being cocked.
----
(It's OK, your safe)
The parentheses had appeared in his mind as FM fell.
"Huh"?
(Grix is asleep, you were right, this is a dream.)
"Who are you then?"
(I,) said Grix's Brain, (am Grix's Brain).
"Ah. So, er, you sure I'm safe?" said FM, not feeling safe at all.
(Of course you are safe, I am in complete control, but I need to know where you want to be before Grix wakes up)
"Er, can I be anywhere I want?"
(It can be arranged....)
"What about Sniper?"
(....)
----
Because a bullet travels faster than the speed of sound, it crept up on Sniper and hit him before he had a chance to think "Hmmm...that sounds like a Lee Enfield being fired..."
On the upside, he reached the end of the barrel quicker than he could ever have hoped for.
----
The crowd roared, Alan Shearer was sprinting down the midfield, Nigel Winterburn was flying after him trying to chop him down, and Lee Dixon was closing in on the left. Shearer shimmied around Winterburn, who sprawled face down in the muddy St. James park pitch, and Shearer dribbled around Dixon into the penalty area. He pulled back his right foot to shoot, the goalie ran forward to block, and Shearer then deftly laid the ball off to Andy Griffin who'd come tearing down the right side into the 6 yard box.
Griffin whacked the ball into the goal past the last sprawling Arsenal defender, and at 4-2 and only 27 minutes to go, the game was effectively sealed for Newcastle. The crowd went wild.
FM bent down and picked up the paper on the ground in front of him. The date was 14th May 2000. He had somehow materialised at his favorite football club at one of their best victories in the '99-'00 Season just in time to see Shearer and Griffin finish off Arsenal for good.
"Cheers Grix!" he said.
( :-) ) said Grix's Brain
"Where are we?" asked Sniper, trudging along sullenly behind FM as he made his way cautiously forward.
"I haven't a clue, I think Grix may be dreaming again, and we're just a part of that dream."
"But? What? How?" Sniper struggled with the concept for a few seconds before deciding that action was better than thinking.
"OK, FM, you're going to slow, I want out of this tunnel, and so I'm taking the lead."
With that Sniper roughly shoved past FM, knocking him sideways as he did so. FM reached out to brace himself against the side of the tunnel, but only felt thin air, and then lost his footing as he plummeted downwards through an inky blackness.
Sniper strode onwards oblivious to his companion's fate, his paces becoming quicker as he moved stealithy yet quickly onwards through the tunnel.
"GRIXXXXXX!!!!111232334555" FM yelled with irate newbie netspeak as he decended at an ever increasing velocity towards, well, towards whereever he was going. "WAKE UP!!! WAKE UP BEFORE I HIT SOMETHING!!!"
There was an ever so slight change in the air around him, something had shifted in the atmosphere, and FM sensed that he was somehow safe. He wasn't sure how he knew this, but he felt somehow protected, even though his velocity had not decreased.
----
Sniper marched on, seeing no end to the tunnel down which he traversed. As he past one particular shaft of light, he noticed how it glinted off a line that seemed to be carved in the tunnel wall. He paused to run his hand over the line, and then followed it up and over his head and down the other side of the tunnel, where it continued onwards like this down the rest of the tunnel.
"Hmm...." Sniper thought, unusually, "This feels like the rifling of a .306 Lee Enfield barrel. Then he heard a sound.
"Hmm...." Sniper thought, again unusually, "That sounds like the click of a .306 Lee Enfield being cocked.
----
(It's OK, your safe)
The parentheses had appeared in his mind as FM fell.
"Huh"?
(Grix is asleep, you were right, this is a dream.)
"Who are you then?"
(I,) said Grix's Brain, (am Grix's Brain).
"Ah. So, er, you sure I'm safe?" said FM, not feeling safe at all.
(Of course you are safe, I am in complete control, but I need to know where you want to be before Grix wakes up)
"Er, can I be anywhere I want?"
(It can be arranged....)
"What about Sniper?"
(....)
----
Because a bullet travels faster than the speed of sound, it crept up on Sniper and hit him before he had a chance to think "Hmmm...that sounds like a Lee Enfield being fired..."
On the upside, he reached the end of the barrel quicker than he could ever have hoped for.
----
The crowd roared, Alan Shearer was sprinting down the midfield, Nigel Winterburn was flying after him trying to chop him down, and Lee Dixon was closing in on the left. Shearer shimmied around Winterburn, who sprawled face down in the muddy St. James park pitch, and Shearer dribbled around Dixon into the penalty area. He pulled back his right foot to shoot, the goalie ran forward to block, and Shearer then deftly laid the ball off to Andy Griffin who'd come tearing down the right side into the 6 yard box.
Griffin whacked the ball into the goal past the last sprawling Arsenal defender, and at 4-2 and only 27 minutes to go, the game was effectively sealed for Newcastle. The crowd went wild.
FM bent down and picked up the paper on the ground in front of him. The date was 14th May 2000. He had somehow materialised at his favorite football club at one of their best victories in the '99-'00 Season just in time to see Shearer and Griffin finish off Arsenal for good.
"Cheers Grix!" he said.
( :-) ) said Grix's Brain
Page: