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See, this has been on my mind for over 10 months or so.
And it's pretty annoying when you've got something on your mind that you can't quite figure out.
Today, it pretty much all came out through tears. And the relief! The relief is so good. A little weight lifted of those weak shoulders.
Right now. I should be eating. With some family. But I'm not there because of this 'freak' problem.
For some reason. I can't eat in front of more than 2 or 3 people. Sounds so simple, yet when you're actually in that situation it's so hard to deal with. One tiny piece of food, whether it's a carrot or a piece of small meat. I will instantly feel sick due to the smell or sight of it.
It's the feeling too that makes it worse. If I find out I've got to go for a meal with people I haven't seen for a very long time, the nervous feeling will kick in making it worse. Sicky feeling.
There hasn't actually been a time, yet, where I've thrown up in front of them. Thankfully! But everytime food slides slowly down the back of my throat it'll make me want to heave.
But today it came out a little more than I expected.
To my mum. Standing at the top of the stairs saying Sorry. Sorry for acting awkward for the past couple of days. She pointed that out.
I'm still laughing because I couldn't say it, and acted like a little 12 year old throwing a hissy and walked off crying into the bedroom.
But she was the most supportive she's possibly ever been.
So. Am I a freak for not being able to eat in front on people anymore?
I couldn't even it my damn Xmas dinner! That sucks.
And it's pretty annoying when you've got something on your mind that you can't quite figure out.
Today, it pretty much all came out through tears. And the relief! The relief is so good. A little weight lifted of those weak shoulders.
Right now. I should be eating. With some family. But I'm not there because of this 'freak' problem.
For some reason. I can't eat in front of more than 2 or 3 people. Sounds so simple, yet when you're actually in that situation it's so hard to deal with. One tiny piece of food, whether it's a carrot or a piece of small meat. I will instantly feel sick due to the smell or sight of it.
It's the feeling too that makes it worse. If I find out I've got to go for a meal with people I haven't seen for a very long time, the nervous feeling will kick in making it worse. Sicky feeling.
There hasn't actually been a time, yet, where I've thrown up in front of them. Thankfully! But everytime food slides slowly down the back of my throat it'll make me want to heave.
But today it came out a little more than I expected.
To my mum. Standing at the top of the stairs saying Sorry. Sorry for acting awkward for the past couple of days. She pointed that out.
I'm still laughing because I couldn't say it, and acted like a little 12 year old throwing a hissy and walked off crying into the bedroom.
But she was the most supportive she's possibly ever been.
So. Am I a freak for not being able to eat in front on people anymore?
I couldn't even it my damn Xmas dinner! That sucks.
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See, this has been on my mind for over 10 months or so.
And it's pretty annoying when you've got something on your mind that you can't quite figure out.
Today, it pretty much all came out through tears. And the relief! The relief is so good. A little weight lifted of those weak shoulders.
Right now. I should be eating. With some family. But I'm not there because of this 'freak' problem.
For some reason. I can't eat in front of more than 2 or 3 people. Sounds so simple, yet when you're actually in that situation it's so hard to deal with. One tiny piece of food, whether it's a carrot or a piece of small meat. I will instantly feel sick due to the smell or sight of it.
It's the feeling too that makes it worse. If I find out I've got to go for a meal with people I haven't seen for a very long time, the nervous feeling will kick in making it worse. Sicky feeling.
There hasn't actually been a time, yet, where I've thrown up in front of them. Thankfully! But everytime food slides slowly down the back of my throat it'll make me want to heave.
But today it came out a little more than I expected.
To my mum. Standing at the top of the stairs saying Sorry. Sorry for acting awkward for the past couple of days. She pointed that out.
I'm still laughing because I couldn't say it, and acted like a little 12 year old throwing a hissy and walked off crying into the bedroom.
But she was the most supportive she's possibly ever been.
So. Am I a freak for not being able to eat in front on people anymore?
I couldn't even it my damn Xmas dinner! That sucks.
And it's pretty annoying when you've got something on your mind that you can't quite figure out.
Today, it pretty much all came out through tears. And the relief! The relief is so good. A little weight lifted of those weak shoulders.
Right now. I should be eating. With some family. But I'm not there because of this 'freak' problem.
For some reason. I can't eat in front of more than 2 or 3 people. Sounds so simple, yet when you're actually in that situation it's so hard to deal with. One tiny piece of food, whether it's a carrot or a piece of small meat. I will instantly feel sick due to the smell or sight of it.
It's the feeling too that makes it worse. If I find out I've got to go for a meal with people I haven't seen for a very long time, the nervous feeling will kick in making it worse. Sicky feeling.
There hasn't actually been a time, yet, where I've thrown up in front of them. Thankfully! But everytime food slides slowly down the back of my throat it'll make me want to heave.
But today it came out a little more than I expected.
To my mum. Standing at the top of the stairs saying Sorry. Sorry for acting awkward for the past couple of days. She pointed that out.
I'm still laughing because I couldn't say it, and acted like a little 12 year old throwing a hissy and walked off crying into the bedroom.
But she was the most supportive she's possibly ever been.
So. Am I a freak for not being able to eat in front on people anymore?
I couldn't even it my damn Xmas dinner! That sucks.
Do you actually have any idea when/why this all started?
Oh Hello there! :)
No idea at all. Pretty much started just a couple weeks before Xmas.
Strange, eh?
No idea at all. Pretty much started just a couple weeks before Xmas.
Strange, eh?
Well, yes, it’s a little odd. Maybe not the problem itself, but the not remembering why you feel that way.
Before last Christmas?
There must be something behind it, Christmas can be a stressful time, perhaps you’ve transported the stress of the Christmas period onto meals involving large numbers of people, as this resembles Christmas dinner.
Was there a big argument at the dinner table involving you or something?
As you can see, I have absolutely no idea.
Before last Christmas?
There must be something behind it, Christmas can be a stressful time, perhaps you’ve transported the stress of the Christmas period onto meals involving large numbers of people, as this resembles Christmas dinner.
Was there a big argument at the dinner table involving you or something?
As you can see, I have absolutely no idea.
Seeing as you said you've no idea, it's pretty good what you wrote! Like you've had some sort of experience dealing with this kind of stuff.
Heh. There was no arguements either. I try to stay quiet at Xmas!
But. Does it make me a freak? Is the question !
Heh. There was no arguements either. I try to stay quiet at Xmas!
But. Does it make me a freak? Is the question !
I wouldn’t say it makes you a freak, it’s more of a quirk. I mean, it must affect you though.
Is it sitting round a table with a large number of people? Can you sit in a restaurant, if there are only two people at your table?
Ms NY wrote:
> I try to stay quiet at Xmas!
Why?
Is it sitting round a table with a large number of people? Can you sit in a restaurant, if there are only two people at your table?
Ms NY wrote:
> I try to stay quiet at Xmas!
Why?
English_Bloke wrote:
> Is it sitting round a table with a large number of people? Can you sit
> in a restaurant, if there are only two people at your table?
That's a good question. It happens with a large number of people. Mainly just people I haven't seen for a month or so. But I wouldn't know about the 'two people' one because I try to avoid those situations now!
> Is it sitting round a table with a large number of people? Can you sit
> in a restaurant, if there are only two people at your table?
That's a good question. It happens with a large number of people. Mainly just people I haven't seen for a month or so. But I wouldn't know about the 'two people' one because I try to avoid those situations now!
Ms NY wrote:
> But I wouldn't know about the 'two people' one because I try to avoid > those situations now!
Why?
> But I wouldn't know about the 'two people' one because I try to avoid > those situations now!
Why?
Because I'll feel like vomiting everywhere! Won't be a nice meal for others.. :D
Do you hate silences?
If you haven’t seen these people for a while and you meet up in a non-eating situation, do you still feel sick?
It’s just that if you’re eating with people, there are quiet periods, unless they talk with the mouths open…and that would be likely to make you feel sick for a different reason.
If you haven’t seen these people for a while and you meet up in a non-eating situation, do you still feel sick?
It’s just that if you’re eating with people, there are quiet periods, unless they talk with the mouths open…and that would be likely to make you feel sick for a different reason.
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