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"Yesterday, I took £70 out of the bank."

It was all in £10 notes because the machine was out of twenties. There was nothing in my wallet but some change.

I bought some trousers and a shirt in a sale for £25, that leave me with £45, 4 £10 notes.

I bought 2 CDs for about £23, that left me with 2 £10 notes.

I went out and got drunk, I broke AT LEAST one tenner during the night, even though Wetherspoons is disturbingly cheap (£2 for a double, sounds good to me) , someone bought me a few drinks because he's rich and stupid like that and I could afford 4 drinks with the change I had.

I woke up this morning with £20 in my wallet, two crisp £10 notes.

I am confused.

It was all in £10 notes because the machine was out of twenties. There was nothing in my wallet but some change.

I bought some trousers and a shirt in a sale for £25, that leave me with £45, 4 £10 notes.

I bought 2 CDs for about £23, that left me with 2 £10 notes.

I went out and got drunk, I broke AT LEAST one tenner during the night, even though Wetherspoons is disturbingly cheap (£2 for a double, sounds good to me) , someone bought me a few drinks because he's rich and stupid like that and I could afford 4 drinks with the change I had.

I woke up this morning with £20 in my wallet, two crisp £10 notes.

I am confused.

You got so drunk you mugged an old lady on the way home.

Again.

It's possible, I have a big old gap after about 11pm.

Don't think I went to the cash machine, doubt I was in any state to use one.

I'd like to find this new flavour of crisps

This seems to be all too common.

My mate had £15 in his wallet for 3 weeks solid, despite spending all of it every Saturday night for 3 weeks.

Drunkenness seems to promote random money generation.

Did you find the money under your pillow?

Did you accidentally let someone pay you for sex?

I apparently disappeared at midnight. I think I walked home, which even at a stagger can be done in under an hour, but my dad was up till twenty past one and didn't see me come in. This morning I had a conversation with a friend (female but attached) who apparently missed a call from me at about 10 to 2 in the morning.

I have no idea what I did, but my trousers (the new ones) have mud on them and my hands were dirty.

BEARDS. wrote:
> and my hands were dirty.

"Out, damned spot! Out, I say! One: two: why, then 'tis time to do't. Hell is murky. Fie, my lord, fie! A soldier, and afeard? What need we fear who knows it, when none can call our pow'r to accompt? Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him?"

No I didn't kill anyone, especially not the King of Scotland.

Did you try to wash your hands in Neptune's great ocean, but did your hands instead make the ocean dirty?

Just to keep in with the Shakespeare theme, mind.