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That being nice has gotten me no where, only brought people taking advantage of them.
I'm not going to be nice to people from now on, except my family.
I'm not going to be nice to people from now on, except my family.
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OakeyDokey wrote:
And nice guys are a dieing
> breed.
Let's face it, since when has the world been full of nice guys? You only have to look at history to see that nothing has changed. I guess it is a rare trait because evolution stamped it out, those evil people millions of years ago who stole the village food supply were the ones who survived.
And nice guys are a dieing
> breed.
Let's face it, since when has the world been full of nice guys? You only have to look at history to see that nothing has changed. I guess it is a rare trait because evolution stamped it out, those evil people millions of years ago who stole the village food supply were the ones who survived.
Totally agree with the topic starter. All through school i was always *so sweet* and *so nice to me* yet it was always the guys who stood the girls up every day and ignored them that always seemed to have the pick of the girls.
I was always just the sweet guy who all the girls came to whenever they wanted to moan about their boyfriends and how *you're such the perfect guy, you always listen to me* well if i was so perfect how come i only had 1 girlfriend through my school life? up until college that is, then the girls actually seemed to know that the nice guys will actually treat them with respect.
I was always just the sweet guy who all the girls came to whenever they wanted to moan about their boyfriends and how *you're such the perfect guy, you always listen to me* well if i was so perfect how come i only had 1 girlfriend through my school life? up until college that is, then the girls actually seemed to know that the nice guys will actually treat them with respect.
Yea. Like I hold open doors for people and let the go first, "Thank-You" would be nice. But no. So i've stopped being nice to people.
Oh. And everyone should play football, great fun for releaving stress..
Oh. And everyone should play football, great fun for releaving stress..
I prefer being a nice guy. It makes your life so easier.
why not occupy the happy medium?
Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it for yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for anyone else walking behind.
Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it for yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for anyone else walking behind.
Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Grix Thraves wrote:
> Nice guy?
>
> Can't you see?
>
> People pride themselves on the fact that they're a "nice"
> person. They truly believe that by never saying what's on their mind
> and just being there to hold people while they cry, that they're a
> "nice" person.
....
> Parenthood turns us into slaves. We become creatures that have this
> sentimental warmth for pleasing people. We're not "nice"
> guys, we're just kids.
That'd be one way of looking at things, one definition of 'nice'.
Another view would be that being 'nice' comes down not to wanting to please people, but genuine compassion and respect for them.
You're there for someone when they need it because you see that they need it, you're there to help them through because you want them to get through.
Not because you know that if you help them you get a pat on the head.
Inevitably some people will be out to seek a pat on the head and a scooby snack (but be disappointed when they don't get a tummy rub?), you're right.
Maybe some do it in a misguided attempt to win favour and get laid, a fairly similar concept.
But not everyone.
> Nice guy?
>
> Can't you see?
>
> People pride themselves on the fact that they're a "nice"
> person. They truly believe that by never saying what's on their mind
> and just being there to hold people while they cry, that they're a
> "nice" person.
....
> Parenthood turns us into slaves. We become creatures that have this
> sentimental warmth for pleasing people. We're not "nice"
> guys, we're just kids.
That'd be one way of looking at things, one definition of 'nice'.
Another view would be that being 'nice' comes down not to wanting to please people, but genuine compassion and respect for them.
You're there for someone when they need it because you see that they need it, you're there to help them through because you want them to get through.
Not because you know that if you help them you get a pat on the head.
Inevitably some people will be out to seek a pat on the head and a scooby snack (but be disappointed when they don't get a tummy rub?), you're right.
Maybe some do it in a misguided attempt to win favour and get laid, a fairly similar concept.
But not everyone.
mikelar wrote:
> why not occupy the happy medium?
>
> Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it for
> yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for
> anyone else walking behind.
>
> Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if
> you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say
> "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Agreed, probably what I'd do.
I like to think of myself as a good person, and that I help people out a lot...so does that make me weak? That I don't get into fights all the time?
And yeah, being nice does suck a lot of the time, but I have a lot of friends and no one really dislikes me...I just need to be a bit better in confrontational situations...but I'm not sure how, to be honest.
> why not occupy the happy medium?
>
> Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it for
> yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for
> anyone else walking behind.
>
> Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if
> you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say
> "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Agreed, probably what I'd do.
I like to think of myself as a good person, and that I help people out a lot...so does that make me weak? That I don't get into fights all the time?
And yeah, being nice does suck a lot of the time, but I have a lot of friends and no one really dislikes me...I just need to be a bit better in confrontational situations...but I'm not sure how, to be honest.
Ant wrote:
> mikelar wrote:
> why not occupy the happy medium?
>
> Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it
> for
> yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for
> anyone else walking behind.
If the person is right behind me, then I do that, I hold it open for anyone a few metres away.
> Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if
> you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say
> "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Gah, I do that all the time, say sorry automatically, it's annoying.
> Agreed, probably what I'd do.
>
> I like to think of myself as a good person, and that I help people out
> a lot...so does that make me weak? That I don't get into fights all
> the time?
>
> And yeah, being nice does suck a lot of the time, but I have a lot of
> friends and no one really dislikes me...I just need to be a bit better
> in confrontational situations...but I'm not sure how, to be honest.
Same here, everyone knows that I'm a nice guy, so they "Extract the urine* with me all the time, knowing that I won't do anything back. And I don't coz I'm a niceguy, and haven't had a girlfriend yet.
*Breaks down into tears*
> mikelar wrote:
> why not occupy the happy medium?
>
> Fore example, instead of opening a door for someone else, open it
> for
> yourself and as you walk through, push the door further open for
> anyone else walking behind.
If the person is right behind me, then I do that, I hold it open for anyone a few metres away.
> Don't be affraid to be the first person to say "sorry" if
> you bump into someone but don't be such an idiot that you'd say
> "sorry" if was obviously their fault. etc etc etc
Gah, I do that all the time, say sorry automatically, it's annoying.
> Agreed, probably what I'd do.
>
> I like to think of myself as a good person, and that I help people out
> a lot...so does that make me weak? That I don't get into fights all
> the time?
>
> And yeah, being nice does suck a lot of the time, but I have a lot of
> friends and no one really dislikes me...I just need to be a bit better
> in confrontational situations...but I'm not sure how, to be honest.
Same here, everyone knows that I'm a nice guy, so they "Extract the urine* with me all the time, knowing that I won't do anything back. And I don't coz I'm a niceguy, and haven't had a girlfriend yet.
*Breaks down into tears*
Primal wrote:
> Or†ega wrote:
> Its still okay to be nice if you *look* intimidating.
>
> Who'd be intimidated of you? I've seen your pic of SO.
If you mean Sheepy, he looks gentle, compared to most people around Glasgow.
Typical Glasgow face:
(@<^>@)
/ && /
\\/\//
Pretty much, I'd say, though my face is perfect, of course.
> Or†ega wrote:
> Its still okay to be nice if you *look* intimidating.
>
> Who'd be intimidated of you? I've seen your pic of SO.
If you mean Sheepy, he looks gentle, compared to most people around Glasgow.
Typical Glasgow face:
(@<^>@)
/ && /
\\/\//
Pretty much, I'd say, though my face is perfect, of course.
People don't appriciate your kindness until you dish out some nastyness as it were.
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