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"I am being Bullied! :("

Unfortunatly I am being bullied at school. It is very upseting and I am unsure what to do.

You see he gives me death threats and says he will "re-arange my face", I have saved these MSN conversations and I am unsure of weather I should tell anyone.
If I tell people I am woundering weather all my friends will call me a wuss for not fighting him and things. But I am not a fighting person. It is really getting me down and it is hard for me to do my final year at GCSE level under this stress.

What should I do?

<- Pappa Lazarou -> wrote:
> almighty you say don't involve your friends, but if you were up town
> and someone started hitting you, you'd expect your friends to help
> you.

I wouldn't purposely go with my friends and start a fight with someone so I knew that if I got battered they would kick his head in. It's a different situation.

almighty > you say don't involve your friends, but if you were up town and someone started hitting you, you'd expect your friends to help you. I think this should span to all situations. If a friend has a problem, you try to help them as best you can. I would personally help if I knew someone was getting regularly knocked about, regardless of the fact that I would get a pasting too. I thought that was what friends were supposed to be for ...... :)

pb > yeah, the martial arts is not some ego trip about being able to floor someone, it really does give you confidence.

the sad truth is that violence is necessary in teaching violent people a lesson. these sort of people understand little else. the neanderthal gene still exists in many people, and the only thing they will respect is people who can give them a pasting.

I am far from being able to defend myself perfectly, but I have certainly learnt enough to

a) no longer freeze when someone hits me, to keep reasonably calm in nasty situations

b) feel less afraid of the morons that you find hanging around pubs and clubs, looking to hit the first person they see.

MoJoJoJo wrote:
> I'm not saying use his mates, I'm saying for him to have his mates
> THERE, to keep an eye on him. He'll have to do the fighting, and if
> he's losing, his friends have to jump in. If they don't, they're not
> very good friends

Sorry MoJoJoJo, but I think this is very bad advice. If he has a fight and then loses then it should stop there. He will have shown the bullies that he can fight back and it won't turn into a gang vs gang situation. These bullies will probably leave him be if he shows that he won't just stand there and take it. Even if the bully wins the fight.

Another thing mate. Tell your mum and then make a diary over a month or so about what happens. Delete this cretin from your MSN, I don't know why you have him there anyway if he is threatening you.

Over a month you should be able to form quite a substancial diary of what this idiot has been doing. Once this is finished, go to see the Head with your mum and give him a copy of the diary and leave it there. The Headmaster will have no option but to do something and he will get this boy in (and his friends if applicable) and show him (them) the diary. He won't be able to prove otherwise and then his parents will be involved. I bet it stops then....

my personal method of ensuring I don't get victimised is learning the martial arts. although this is a very long process and won't help you in the short term.

there are several strategies my friend.

first of all you could tell your parents, like someone else said, and although this may work, I think really, you need to get in the habit of sticking up for yourself. Remember, bullying is not confined to schools, you will run into people like this all your life, and one day your parents or friends won't be there.

Death threats are a serious issue, I agree, if you believe they are serious, then yes tell your parents or teacher. If not, you need to let your friends know how much of a misery these people are making of your life. If they refuse to help you, then they are cowards.

Ultimately though , you are going to have to stand up to these people in some way. Bullies pick on people they perceive to be weak. If you show yourself to be more than willing to take action about these threats, if not violently then by going to the police, then I am sure they will leave you alone. see how tough they feel when you call the police about their death threats.

Good luck chief

The Almighty wrote:
> (a) Starting trouble using your mates as cover will only make things
> worse. You will get him then he will come back with his mates and get
> you etc etc

-------

But he'd do that anyway... You need to make sure that he knows if he wants trouble, he'll get more than he can handle


The Almighty wrote:
> (b) No one should use their friends to sort out their battles as they
> get their friends in trouble.

--------

I'm not saying use his mates, I'm saying for him to have his mates THERE, to keep an eye on him. He'll have to do the fighting, and if he's losing, his friends have to jump in. If they don't, they're not very good friends

MoJoJoJo wrote:
> Do you actually know this kid? Is he hard? I'm sure your mates, if
> they're real mates, will help you kick him in

I wouldn't do this for two reasons:

(a) Starting trouble using your mates as cover will only make things worse. You will get him then he will come back with his mates and get you etc etc

(b) No one should use their friends to sort out their battles as they get their friends in trouble.

Delete his address from your MSN firstly and then try and keep out of the idiot's way.

Fighting isnt bad, but its not good, especially if you do end up getting kicked in. When i got bullied i let it get me down, i used to cry everyday after i got back from school. Then i thought, enough is enough, i told my mum and she told the school. The bullying stopped within a few days of the school being told.