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I DEMAND TRIAL BY COMBAT
By Aidan Mcgurran
FED up Leon Humphreys shocked magistrates by demanding the right to trial by combat under medieval law.
Jobless mechanic Leon, 60, made his request after being charged with failing to notify the DVLA that his motorbike was off the road.
He claimed he was entitled to ask the court to establish his guilt or innocence by allowing him to fight to the death against a champion nominated by the DVLA.
Leon said the fact he had opted for trial by combat meant he did not have to enter a plea.
But JPs decided to log his unusual request as a not guilty plea and adjourned his case.
Bachelor Leon, of Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk, said after the hearing: "I believe the right to trial by combat is still on the statute books. I am willing to fight a champion put up by the DVLA if they want to accept my challenge."
The right to trial by combat was introduced by the Normans. It was assumed the person in the right would win as God would back the victor.
The law allowed priests, women and the elderly to substitute champions to fight on their behalf.
The practice was commonplace until the 1300s when trial by jury began.
A spokesman for the Lord Chancellor's department said: "I am not aware that anyone has the right to demand trial by combat these days."
By Aidan Mcgurran
FED up Leon Humphreys shocked magistrates by demanding the right to trial by combat under medieval law.
Jobless mechanic Leon, 60, made his request after being charged with failing to notify the DVLA that his motorbike was off the road.
He claimed he was entitled to ask the court to establish his guilt or innocence by allowing him to fight to the death against a champion nominated by the DVLA.
Leon said the fact he had opted for trial by combat meant he did not have to enter a plea.
But JPs decided to log his unusual request as a not guilty plea and adjourned his case.
Bachelor Leon, of Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk, said after the hearing: "I believe the right to trial by combat is still on the statute books. I am willing to fight a champion put up by the DVLA if they want to accept my challenge."
The right to trial by combat was introduced by the Normans. It was assumed the person in the right would win as God would back the victor.
The law allowed priests, women and the elderly to substitute champions to fight on their behalf.
The practice was commonplace until the 1300s when trial by jury began.
A spokesman for the Lord Chancellor's department said: "I am not aware that anyone has the right to demand trial by combat these days."
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"I challenge yew to a haggis eating contest sir"
ew.
ew.
" Right you ya wee bas, ye dinnae knock a policeman's hat off "
" I challenge you to a dual sir "
" I challenge you to a dual sir "
Excellent.
Water Bombs and Pea Shooters are also being considered
Water Bombs and Pea Shooters are also being considered
trial by comabt, with Nerf guns and super soakers.
That's justice in motion.
That's justice in motion.
Heh,
Foam baseball bats at the ready
Foam baseball bats at the ready
LMFAO! Bloody hilarious!
Although, it sounds like something a Klingon would do....as well as someone from Essex.
Although, it sounds like something a Klingon would do....as well as someone from Essex.
Excellent.
SO, is it unarmed combat or does one party get to choose the weapons?
Boardsword and shield, or mounts and lances?
SO, is it unarmed combat or does one party get to choose the weapons?
Boardsword and shield, or mounts and lances?
Shut up.
CONFUSED!
why is it so hard to say???
why is it so hard to say???
LOL thats the funniest thing ive read all day.
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