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I DEMAND TRIAL BY COMBAT
By Aidan Mcgurran
FED up Leon Humphreys shocked magistrates by demanding the right to trial by combat under medieval law.
Jobless mechanic Leon, 60, made his request after being charged with failing to notify the DVLA that his motorbike was off the road.
He claimed he was entitled to ask the court to establish his guilt or innocence by allowing him to fight to the death against a champion nominated by the DVLA.
Leon said the fact he had opted for trial by combat meant he did not have to enter a plea.
But JPs decided to log his unusual request as a not guilty plea and adjourned his case.
Bachelor Leon, of Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk, said after the hearing: "I believe the right to trial by combat is still on the statute books. I am willing to fight a champion put up by the DVLA if they want to accept my challenge."
The right to trial by combat was introduced by the Normans. It was assumed the person in the right would win as God would back the victor.
The law allowed priests, women and the elderly to substitute champions to fight on their behalf.
The practice was commonplace until the 1300s when trial by jury began.
A spokesman for the Lord Chancellor's department said: "I am not aware that anyone has the right to demand trial by combat these days."
By Aidan Mcgurran
FED up Leon Humphreys shocked magistrates by demanding the right to trial by combat under medieval law.
Jobless mechanic Leon, 60, made his request after being charged with failing to notify the DVLA that his motorbike was off the road.
He claimed he was entitled to ask the court to establish his guilt or innocence by allowing him to fight to the death against a champion nominated by the DVLA.
Leon said the fact he had opted for trial by combat meant he did not have to enter a plea.
But JPs decided to log his unusual request as a not guilty plea and adjourned his case.
Bachelor Leon, of Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk, said after the hearing: "I believe the right to trial by combat is still on the statute books. I am willing to fight a champion put up by the DVLA if they want to accept my challenge."
The right to trial by combat was introduced by the Normans. It was assumed the person in the right would win as God would back the victor.
The law allowed priests, women and the elderly to substitute champions to fight on their behalf.
The practice was commonplace until the 1300s when trial by jury began.
A spokesman for the Lord Chancellor's department said: "I am not aware that anyone has the right to demand trial by combat these days."
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is it possible to be strangled to death with an object of desire?
i say it is.
i say it is.
I get images of two men fighting in a colleseum.
Then the winner gets to fight four ungry lions. The Romans had the right idea I tell ya.
Then the winner gets to fight four ungry lions. The Romans had the right idea I tell ya.
Grix Thraves wrote:
> Yup, he'd maim you with an ordinary utensil which ordinary people
> would use for ordinary purposes, but no, not he, he'd use them like no
> other would, and when he stands over your dead body, he'll check the
> little text file he has on his desktop for a suitable latin quote, and
> my goodness, he'll seem so different to the rest.
A damn long sentence that one. Unlike this one.
> Yup, he'd maim you with an ordinary utensil which ordinary people
> would use for ordinary purposes, but no, not he, he'd use them like no
> other would, and when he stands over your dead body, he'll check the
> little text file he has on his desktop for a suitable latin quote, and
> my goodness, he'll seem so different to the rest.
A damn long sentence that one. Unlike this one.
Grix Thraves wrote:
> Yup, he'd maim you with an ordinary utensil which ordinary people
> would use for ordinary purposes, but no, not he, he'd use them like no
> other would, and when he stands over your dead body, he'll check the
> little text file he has on his desktop for a suitable latin quote, and
> my goodness, he'll seem so different to the rest.
the file is almost 5k.
> Yup, he'd maim you with an ordinary utensil which ordinary people
> would use for ordinary purposes, but no, not he, he'd use them like no
> other would, and when he stands over your dead body, he'll check the
> little text file he has on his desktop for a suitable latin quote, and
> my goodness, he'll seem so different to the rest.
the file is almost 5k.
Mr. Happy wrote:
> IB could kill you with a teaspoon...
or a ladle
> Nerf guns and supersoakers can doubtlessly be converted into weapons
> of lethal power with relative ease.
No, you need an exact547.12 volt charge put through them.. erm... not that I'd know...
> IB could kill you with a teaspoon...
or a ladle
> Nerf guns and supersoakers can doubtlessly be converted into weapons
> of lethal power with relative ease.
No, you need an exact547.12 volt charge put through them.. erm... not that I'd know...
Yup, he'd maim you with an ordinary utensil which ordinary people would use for ordinary purposes, but no, not he, he'd use them like no other would, and when he stands over your dead body, he'll check the little text file he has on his desktop for a suitable latin quote, and my goodness, he'll seem so different to the rest.
Goatboy wrote:
> Insane Bartender wrote:
> trial by comabt, with Nerf guns and super soakers.
>
> That's justice in motion.
> --
>
> It says "to the death"
IB could kill you with a teaspoon...
Nerf guns and supersoakers can doubtlessly be converted into weapons of lethal power with relative ease.
> Insane Bartender wrote:
> trial by comabt, with Nerf guns and super soakers.
>
> That's justice in motion.
> --
>
> It says "to the death"
IB could kill you with a teaspoon...
Nerf guns and supersoakers can doubtlessly be converted into weapons of lethal power with relative ease.
that was BAD!
you need a motorbike to get behind her!
Your mama *so* fat
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