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"I was bullied"

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Tue 19/02/02 at 13:04
Regular
Posts: 787
Ever since primary school I have been bullied. Not physically, I've never been hit, kicked, or threatened by any high degree of violence. Just mental and verbal bullying. Some say it's the worst kind.

So what actually happened?

Well, I've always been considered as the sensible one. The person who seems mature for my age group. Also the one who used to be enthusiastic about learning in primary school. I was always first to put up my hand when the teacher asked a question, always one of the first to complete my work, always the one who'd be first to line up to go back to the classroom at the end of break times.

So ofcourse you can probably understand what came out of it. Lots of verbal diahorrea about being weak, teachers pet, and stuff like that. I don't really want to go into too much detail about what they said because: 1. I don't like mentioning them and 2. I've put a mental block on that kinda thing.

To be honest I don't see what's wrong with any of the above. The whole point in going to school is to learn. And what's the point in causing complications? Of course I didn't want the breaks to end, but I'd rather things ran smoothly than be kept behind for any reason.

Anyway, it's not just verbal bullying I've had to put up since I was 5, I've had to put up with exclusion. You know how when certain people get left out or picked for teams in sports last, no matter what their abilities are like? That can be quite hurtful, and believe me, I know after putting up with twelve years of it.

And again, it's not just exclusion from sports. No matter how much I've tried to fit in, I've only ever had a few friends I can actually call "good friends". I've always been in small groups of friends, those few that would put up with me. Most probably wouldn't stick up for me if I needed it, they'd just walk away if anything happened to me.

So why else is it that I'm left alone like this? Is it my polite manner? Is it because I'd rather be friends with people than enemies? Because I don't spit everywhere, smoke, drink, take drugs, and take part in illegal activities? Is it because I'm not interested in pop-bands or how Geri Halliwell looks now she's got her own yoga video? Is it because I'm a huge fan of videogaming? Gamers are still associated with computer nerds who stay up all night and day in a small dark room with their computer monitor being their only source of light, speaking to jackass592 on AOL whilst downloading pictures of obscene behaviour with a carrot and bubblebath.

Since I've moved to Cardiff, I've still had to put up with it. For the first few years of high school, I tried to fit in, and from day 1, people commented on my accent! Not in a friendly, having a laugh kinda way, but an annoying aggressive kind of way which again is hurtful!

During the last couple of years, I've managed to make friends with someone who has also had similar problems because of the way he looks. There's nothing wrong with him at all, and I can't see why people are so hurtful towards him. All that's different is he hasn't got any pigment in his hair or skin. So he's paler and has very light blonde hair. He can't help it, if he could've chosen differently he would have, but people just exclude him and call him stupid names involving Ice-cream because of it.

Infact, someone who I thought was a friend years ago now keeps saying "Why do you hang round with White Boy all the time, you should be hanging round with us." to which I reply "Shut up. I'd rather hang round with elmo from Sesame Street than hang round with someone who makes fun of my friends!"

You could say that it's dying down now. I still get the social exclusion because of my personality, and because of my choice of best friend. I have learnt to stick up for myself, but it isn't easy and no one should have to do it. It's not easy on me, my friend, or anyone else who has been bullied in such a way. It's easy to hit people, or to call them something back, but you don't achieve anything by it. They do it all the more because they know they'll get a reaction.

Most of the time, I've managed to hide my pain, my feelings of hurt and anger towards people. That's the kind of person I am. I control my emotions. And to be honest, this is the first time I've gone into this much detail about it to anyone.

Again, as I said about my illnesses, gaming has pulled me through it all. If I didn't have that much or a destraction, I probably would have lost my sense of individuality and have started lashing out on people in school for no reasons at all. Gaming allows me to take my frustration out on bunches of pixels which look like aliens and people, instead of doing it in real life.

So just remember, before you write, type or say anything to someone which could be interpreted in anyway to be insulting, hurtful, no matter how mild, it could effect someone in a way you don't even realise!
Fri 22/02/02 at 01:29
Regular
"5 European Cups!!!"
Posts: 5,795
Lord Semajal, I respect the fact that you think that, but if anyone came in here who was a bully, we could actually find out why they do it, AND help people who are bullied
Fri 22/02/02 at 01:22
Posts: 0
I can myself lucky that i was never bullied, i am not the most fearful pf people around so it can't be because of that but maybe it was because i was friends with the two hardest people in my year and i knew alot of the older years.
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:39
Regular
Posts: 15,681
I dunno, it could be interesting to see what they say.

Some might actually change after reading this topic. Infact I hope they do!
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:29
Regular
"Jags is teh l33t"
Posts: 4,074
slave2games wrote:
> I want to ear fro anyone in here who was/is a bully. It would be good to get
> their thoughts and opinions...any takers?

No offence but thats a stupid thing to say. If someone bullied someone else they are unlikely to say so here because people would rip them apart with comments.

Well thats what i think may happen.
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:26
Regular
Posts: 15,681
My supervisor at work I could accuse of bullying.

I quit the job because of her. She kept putting me down for pathetic things! Any other person who saw my work report would have laughed their heads off reading what she wrote!

Anyway, there's nothing she can do now, I made my complaint to the manager, she got a rollocking, and now I'm looking for some part time employment...
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:26
Regular
"Jags is teh l33t"
Posts: 4,074
ive been bullied for every stupid reason in the book.

Apaarently i walked funny

or my hair looked stupid.

God some people have no imagination.

Basicly ive been bullied for a long time and been bullied about almost everytihng.
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:23
Regular
"5 European Cups!!!"
Posts: 5,795
I want to ear fro anyone in here who was/is a bully. It would be good to get their thoughts and opinions...any takers?
Thu 21/02/02 at 23:18
Regular
Posts: 15,681
Although I don't agree with the actions of your sister, good on her! :)

He can afford to have it repaired!

I'm glad this topic has been of help to you, and even though quite a few replies are mine, I'm suprised at the amount of stories that have appeared in this topic.

I hope that for those of you who haven't posted your stories for whatever reason have been able to get something out of this topic, and for those who haven't ever had a problem with bullying, I hope you now have some insight to what the effects of bullying can do to people and will have some understanding should a friend be in need of support.
Thu 21/02/02 at 22:41
Regular
"um..."
Posts: 944
This is the honest to god truth

one of the people who bullied me has come into a bit of money, his grandad won 1.4 million on the lottery and has a new car. my sister scratched an extremely offencive word in the side because he called her a tart

I dunno if I can vote in the elections but if so I know who I am voting for, this topic has given me a chance to get a lot off my chest

thanx

'coy
Thu 21/02/02 at 21:50
Regular
"um..."
Posts: 944
Where's my reply gone? I cant find it

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