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"Oh great"

I have been summoned for Jury Service.
I don't want to, but there is nothing you can do about it.
You can ask to defer, but they have refused me.

Damn.
I hope none of you are appearing in court from Feb 18th onwards.

My mate did jury duty. He had a case of a man stacking his caravan into the centre divider on a motorway delibrately.

No, I know what I'm like.
It will be a simple thing and I'll end up spending 4 months arguing with everyone about some little point.

This is going to suck, who would want me judging them?
I bloody wouldn't

Goatboy wrote:
> I have been summoned for Jury Service.
I don't want to, but there is nothing
> you can do about it.
You can ask to defer, but they have refused
> me.

Damn.
I hope none of you are appearing in court from Feb 18th onwards.



send a letter saying:

I am racist against all racists.

(Homer Simpson)

Sonic

Pretend to be a sci-fi geek.

"Star Trek Grand Council of the Stars (or whatever) demands I serve three years deep-space before being allowed to sit on the jury. And I haven't met any Klingons yet."

Then they'd back away. Slowly, as to risk no injury.

Hurrah!
I hope I turn up, get on a case straight away and it's some ape fighting in a club.

Sentence him to 2 weeks of spelling tests, home for tea!

My wife completed 2 weeks of Jury Service just before Xmas and loved every minute of it, especially when she got to do the delivery speach... you know the bit where the jurer stands and gives their verdict...

There's no guarantee that you'll actually get to sit in on a case so you could go the whole 2 weeks without seeing the inside of a court room at all...

In total, out of 14 days, my wife was only needed for 8!

Heh, I'd also be a bad member of the jury:

Accused: "I had battered him to death with a copy of Lord of the Rings..."

Me:"DAMN SCUM! Lock him up. Make him grow a beard."

Other suggestions:

"Only god can sit in judgement and I am not God. Well, I'm not *the* god."

"I do not believe Earth Laws apply to me"

And someone else suggested I sit and emit a low hum in the selection room.

I hope I never to jury service. I'd want to send someone down for life for liking Limp Bizkit.

Lawyer "So what were you doing on the night of the crime?"

The accused: "Well I was at a Limp Bizkit concert"

Me: "lock him up, and throw away the key, scum!"

A friend of mine got out of it by saying she knew someone in the old bill. Work that one out. Mind you, that was at the Old Bailey.