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FM looked at the control panel and watched the green oscilloscope wave illuminated on the darker green background. To be honest, he hadn’t really figured out what it did yet, but still liked to have it there going up and down at regular intervals. The ship was a deep space science vessel with three silver fins at the back and a nose that looked almost like some sort of kitchen impliment.
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
Page:
FM - Well, we need to find out what scienceofficercide is, right? So...
::FM walks over to Er-No's LCD screen on his headplate and types in something::
FM - I'v got it. scienceofficercide - an act of exploiting ones scientific knowledge and using it for one's selfishness/needs or evil deeds.
Grix - Us? Evil? Hehe! Ok, in all seriousness, we need to plea our case. GUARD!
::Salevaa walks over to the cell::
Salevaa - Yes?
Grix - We are innocent! We never committed scienceofficercide!
Salevaa - Sure, tell it to the judge!
FM - Ouch!
Grix - FM?
Salevaa - What seems to be the problem?
FM - I'm bleeding! Real bad!
Salevaa - Let me check that out.
::Salevaa walks into the cell with a night stick and holds it above FM's head::
Salevaa - This should sort you out!
::Grix comes from behind, snatches the stick and knocks out Salevaa with the stick::
Grix - Let's get out of here.
::They lock the cell and throw the keys across the room. They run through the halls and see Mouldy Cheese. He aims his gun and they duck the shots. There is an opening up ahead::
Grix - Do we keep going to the opening?
Er-No - I'll calculate our odds of survival on the computer. Wait! It appears that we are going to land in...
::It is too late - they have run into the opening. Grix, FM and Er-No fall down a few feet and land in something soft, but slimy::
Er-No - ...sewage...
FM - Well, we escaped, but what to do now?
Grix - We are still in this damn desert and we are about 30 miles from camp.
-----
::FM walks over to Er-No's LCD screen on his headplate and types in something::
FM - I'v got it. scienceofficercide - an act of exploiting ones scientific knowledge and using it for one's selfishness/needs or evil deeds.
Grix - Us? Evil? Hehe! Ok, in all seriousness, we need to plea our case. GUARD!
::Salevaa walks over to the cell::
Salevaa - Yes?
Grix - We are innocent! We never committed scienceofficercide!
Salevaa - Sure, tell it to the judge!
FM - Ouch!
Grix - FM?
Salevaa - What seems to be the problem?
FM - I'm bleeding! Real bad!
Salevaa - Let me check that out.
::Salevaa walks into the cell with a night stick and holds it above FM's head::
Salevaa - This should sort you out!
::Grix comes from behind, snatches the stick and knocks out Salevaa with the stick::
Grix - Let's get out of here.
::They lock the cell and throw the keys across the room. They run through the halls and see Mouldy Cheese. He aims his gun and they duck the shots. There is an opening up ahead::
Grix - Do we keep going to the opening?
Er-No - I'll calculate our odds of survival on the computer. Wait! It appears that we are going to land in...
::It is too late - they have run into the opening. Grix, FM and Er-No fall down a few feet and land in something soft, but slimy::
Er-No - ...sewage...
FM - Well, we escaped, but what to do now?
Grix - We are still in this damn desert and we are about 30 miles from camp.
-----
Meka, Mouldy Cheese and Salevaa stood around in the middle of the desert... Grix, FM and er-no walked up to them.
"Hey... how the hell did you find us? We didn't send out any signal..."
"You're under arrest, for attempted scienceofficercide. Follow us."
--------------
"Why is it we always end up in some sort of prison in every damn story?"
"Seems the natural thing to do." FM answered.
They looked around... it was virtually impossible to get out of...
But at least they left er-no in with them, he could prove useful in escape...
"Hang on, why SHOULD we escape? We don't even know what we've done... all we need to do is prove our innocence..." Grix said aloud to his thoughts.
"Hey?"
Grix looked up. "Err... We need to find out what scienceofficercide is."
"Isn't it obvious?" FM asked.
"No."
FM sighed.
"Hey... how the hell did you find us? We didn't send out any signal..."
"You're under arrest, for attempted scienceofficercide. Follow us."
--------------
"Why is it we always end up in some sort of prison in every damn story?"
"Seems the natural thing to do." FM answered.
They looked around... it was virtually impossible to get out of...
But at least they left er-no in with them, he could prove useful in escape...
"Hang on, why SHOULD we escape? We don't even know what we've done... all we need to do is prove our innocence..." Grix said aloud to his thoughts.
"Hey?"
Grix looked up. "Err... We need to find out what scienceofficercide is."
"Isn't it obvious?" FM asked.
"No."
FM sighed.
Pb shook his head again. What was happening? He remembered arguing with Grix and the android Er-no, he remembered hitting Grix and being hit himself and he remembered someone called Sniper ‘helping’ him. It didn’t make any sense, it was like someone was controlling him, living his life for him.
Pb looked around, meka Dragon and the rest of Team B had disappeared into the distance while PB was wondering. He turned around and thought that he could make out a shadow in the heat haze behind him, the shadow became clearer and larger and he realised it was Sniper.
“So. What brings you out in to the dessert?” Sniper said, smiling far too broadly for Pb’s liking.
“I..I’m trying to make my way back to the ship…” Pb tried to explain, he found that his brain seemed to be fogging over as he talked.
“Ah. You’re friends aren’t really in a talkative mood at the moment. It would be much better if you came with me. I have a place nearby. Follow.”
Pb followed the purple robed Sniper. He seemed to know what he was doing, in fact, he seemed to act as if he owned the planet. Strange.
A concealed door opened in the sand and Pb stepped into a vast cave. He looked around and noticed that the cave had been decorated with gold awnings and luxurious furniture, in the corner he noticed a large view screen and some computer equipment.
“Ah.” Said Sniper, noticing Pb’s stare. “You approve? I’ve been working on this place since I, er, landed many years ago. Luckily, I’ve had my faithful servant Mr Nice Guy to help out.”
“You did all this?” said pb in disbelief as he surveyed the mass of winding tunnels and the gleaming structures. “It must have taken years!”
Pb remembered his friends. “I have to get back to Fm and …and….who was I with again?” His head became foggy again.
“Don’t concern yourself. Your friends will be looked after soon. I’ve sent out a party to fetch them.” Sniper replied smoothly while motioning pb to a comfy looking room. “Stay here for now and rest. There is much to do in the morning.”
- - -
“Grix?” said FM as Grix tugged the last piece of metal back to the ship.
“Yes FM.” Said Grix without looking up.
“There are some people in the distance. I believe one of them looks like Meka…”
Grix looked up. “Oh yes. Better go meet them then.”
Pb looked around, meka Dragon and the rest of Team B had disappeared into the distance while PB was wondering. He turned around and thought that he could make out a shadow in the heat haze behind him, the shadow became clearer and larger and he realised it was Sniper.
“So. What brings you out in to the dessert?” Sniper said, smiling far too broadly for Pb’s liking.
“I..I’m trying to make my way back to the ship…” Pb tried to explain, he found that his brain seemed to be fogging over as he talked.
“Ah. You’re friends aren’t really in a talkative mood at the moment. It would be much better if you came with me. I have a place nearby. Follow.”
Pb followed the purple robed Sniper. He seemed to know what he was doing, in fact, he seemed to act as if he owned the planet. Strange.
A concealed door opened in the sand and Pb stepped into a vast cave. He looked around and noticed that the cave had been decorated with gold awnings and luxurious furniture, in the corner he noticed a large view screen and some computer equipment.
“Ah.” Said Sniper, noticing Pb’s stare. “You approve? I’ve been working on this place since I, er, landed many years ago. Luckily, I’ve had my faithful servant Mr Nice Guy to help out.”
“You did all this?” said pb in disbelief as he surveyed the mass of winding tunnels and the gleaming structures. “It must have taken years!”
Pb remembered his friends. “I have to get back to Fm and …and….who was I with again?” His head became foggy again.
“Don’t concern yourself. Your friends will be looked after soon. I’ve sent out a party to fetch them.” Sniper replied smoothly while motioning pb to a comfy looking room. “Stay here for now and rest. There is much to do in the morning.”
- - -
“Grix?” said FM as Grix tugged the last piece of metal back to the ship.
“Yes FM.” Said Grix without looking up.
“There are some people in the distance. I believe one of them looks like Meka…”
Grix looked up. “Oh yes. Better go meet them then.”
Meka Dragon - I'm part of Team B of this mission. We were alerted by a distress call from Team A and we arrived here ASAP. What seems to be the trouble?
Pb - There are these people - Er-No, Grix Thraves and FantasyMeister, who are trying to kill me!
::Meka lifts his phone to his lips::
Meka - Come in.
::In walk two people::
Pb - Who are they?
Meka - Meet Mouldy Cheese and Salevaa, the best trained in our squad for this type of clean-up situation.
Pb - These guys seem kinda tough, (whispers to himself) but they won't steal my leading role in this story.
::Meka, MC and Salevaa walk off into the distance, trackers in hand::
Meka - Aren't you coming, Pb?
Pb - Yeah, I'll be right there.
::Pb catches up and they walk off to find Er-No, Grix and FM.
-----
Pb - There are these people - Er-No, Grix Thraves and FantasyMeister, who are trying to kill me!
::Meka lifts his phone to his lips::
Meka - Come in.
::In walk two people::
Pb - Who are they?
Meka - Meet Mouldy Cheese and Salevaa, the best trained in our squad for this type of clean-up situation.
Pb - These guys seem kinda tough, (whispers to himself) but they won't steal my leading role in this story.
::Meka, MC and Salevaa walk off into the distance, trackers in hand::
Meka - Aren't you coming, Pb?
Pb - Yeah, I'll be right there.
::Pb catches up and they walk off to find Er-No, Grix and FM.
-----
While walking, FM and Grix fell to their knees, clutching their heads. A house of palm trees? Damn that was hard to imagine... and it looked like they didn't quite clean out er-no's innards either...
Still, er-no HAD found a spitfire, which might be useful if there was any fuel. FM though that they'll probably have to remove the deer from it first though, wouldn't fly well with the weight out of balance.
As they watched er-no, they thought perhaps they should tell er-no that cooking meat was perhaps the best thing to do before eating it. Couldn't do much harm though, being a robot and all.
"I don't like this Adam and Eve stuff FM." Grix said, following er-no into the house of palm trees, making every effort not to look at it, "Sure, this planet seems pretty warm, but I'm still sure there's someone watching us."
"You're just obviously paranoid... and you AREN'T building up tension in the plot whatsoever, you know."
"Worth a try though, remember, this is supposed to be a cheap sci-fi story."
FM glanced at Grix.
"I mean, the Government really does underfund us, you know."
er-no beeped six times.
"Ah crap, the tea! It's probably gone cold." FM said, running to er-no and pressing the dispence button. A plastic cup popped out from behind, and FM continued to fill it with the tea. He then pressed another button, and added milk, and then sugar.
"You want some?" FM asked.
"I've told you, I have a small problem drinking that stuff after seeing where it came from."
"Turn around then." FM said.
"No thanks."
FM walked over to the spitfire, and checked out the paintwork.
"You know, with all the drugs and herbs that Pb worked with... perhaps he messed up, and that's what made him crazy... I can't really imagine him trying to kill us if he was in a right state of mind."
"I can." er-no said.
"I don't care. He's loyal to us, and we've been through a lot together."
FM sipped his cup, and accidently spilt some tea on his hand, burning it.
"Ouch... damnit, it's hot!"
FM bent down to pick up the cup.
-------------------
Pb heard the scream in the distance... the girlish whimper right at the end of the high pitched warble... that was Grix alright, and he was close.
Pb clutched his chest as he walked further on and on... looking back, perhaps attacking Sniper after he had helped him wasn't the greatest thing he could have done... but he did turn him into an android...
Pb felt his chest... the metal plate had gone!... Oh great, stealing from Red Dwarf, again.
Pb waved his fist at the sky and shouted... "I don't know how you do it, or where you are... Come up with something original! Please!"
Hallucinations, pah. That stuff Sniper put in him obviously made him see things not exactly as they were...
Why was he thinking this? He'd just figured that out? It was like he was just confirming it for himself...
Must be going mad.
Pb shook his head, and waited patiently for the red and black hammers to cross in front of him...
"Hey, you!"
Pb looked around. A man stood by a sand buggy.
"Me?"
"Yeah. You."
Pb looked around, and then back at the man.
"What do you want?"
Still, er-no HAD found a spitfire, which might be useful if there was any fuel. FM though that they'll probably have to remove the deer from it first though, wouldn't fly well with the weight out of balance.
As they watched er-no, they thought perhaps they should tell er-no that cooking meat was perhaps the best thing to do before eating it. Couldn't do much harm though, being a robot and all.
"I don't like this Adam and Eve stuff FM." Grix said, following er-no into the house of palm trees, making every effort not to look at it, "Sure, this planet seems pretty warm, but I'm still sure there's someone watching us."
"You're just obviously paranoid... and you AREN'T building up tension in the plot whatsoever, you know."
"Worth a try though, remember, this is supposed to be a cheap sci-fi story."
FM glanced at Grix.
"I mean, the Government really does underfund us, you know."
er-no beeped six times.
"Ah crap, the tea! It's probably gone cold." FM said, running to er-no and pressing the dispence button. A plastic cup popped out from behind, and FM continued to fill it with the tea. He then pressed another button, and added milk, and then sugar.
"You want some?" FM asked.
"I've told you, I have a small problem drinking that stuff after seeing where it came from."
"Turn around then." FM said.
"No thanks."
FM walked over to the spitfire, and checked out the paintwork.
"You know, with all the drugs and herbs that Pb worked with... perhaps he messed up, and that's what made him crazy... I can't really imagine him trying to kill us if he was in a right state of mind."
"I can." er-no said.
"I don't care. He's loyal to us, and we've been through a lot together."
FM sipped his cup, and accidently spilt some tea on his hand, burning it.
"Ouch... damnit, it's hot!"
FM bent down to pick up the cup.
-------------------
Pb heard the scream in the distance... the girlish whimper right at the end of the high pitched warble... that was Grix alright, and he was close.
Pb clutched his chest as he walked further on and on... looking back, perhaps attacking Sniper after he had helped him wasn't the greatest thing he could have done... but he did turn him into an android...
Pb felt his chest... the metal plate had gone!... Oh great, stealing from Red Dwarf, again.
Pb waved his fist at the sky and shouted... "I don't know how you do it, or where you are... Come up with something original! Please!"
Hallucinations, pah. That stuff Sniper put in him obviously made him see things not exactly as they were...
Why was he thinking this? He'd just figured that out? It was like he was just confirming it for himself...
Must be going mad.
Pb shook his head, and waited patiently for the red and black hammers to cross in front of him...
"Hey, you!"
Pb looked around. A man stood by a sand buggy.
"Me?"
"Yeah. You."
Pb looked around, and then back at the man.
"What do you want?"
Grix - Why would there be a giant robot shoe in the middle of the de...
FM - Grix, I think we have our answer...
::The screen zooms out and giant footprints are in the dirt::
FM - Er-No, trace those footprints!
::Er-No walks over to the tracks and a beeping noise is heard::
Er-No - The footprints are new - very new...
Grix - How new?
::Er-No makes another noise::
Er-No - These footprints were made 40 minutes ago!? They have gone 23 north and 7 miles west.
FM - So what do we do?
Er-No - We should do as instructed and set-up camp.
Grix - But all our possessions are back at the ship.
Er-No - Just use what we can find.
::A large noise sounds in the sky and a blinding white light flashes for just a second::
FM - Where are our clothes!?
Er-No - That was wind molecular transference - a force that can transfer any given item to another location.
Grix - Oh!
::Grix and FM hide their "dignity"::
Er-No - I'll be right back.
::Er-No rushes over to a palm tree and uses a mini-blade to chop the leaves down. He rushes back and hands one each to FM and Grix. Grix looks at FM sheepishly::
Er-No - Afix those to your genitals and I will set up camp.
::Grix goes into deep thought whilst FM walks over to a tree to find a solution::
Er-No - There - camp is set up.
::Grix and FM look over to a house of palm trees, equipped with a lit fire and 3 dead deers on a spitfire. They stare in awe::
Er-No - Let's eat!
-----
FM - Grix, I think we have our answer...
::The screen zooms out and giant footprints are in the dirt::
FM - Er-No, trace those footprints!
::Er-No walks over to the tracks and a beeping noise is heard::
Er-No - The footprints are new - very new...
Grix - How new?
::Er-No makes another noise::
Er-No - These footprints were made 40 minutes ago!? They have gone 23 north and 7 miles west.
FM - So what do we do?
Er-No - We should do as instructed and set-up camp.
Grix - But all our possessions are back at the ship.
Er-No - Just use what we can find.
::A large noise sounds in the sky and a blinding white light flashes for just a second::
FM - Where are our clothes!?
Er-No - That was wind molecular transference - a force that can transfer any given item to another location.
Grix - Oh!
::Grix and FM hide their "dignity"::
Er-No - I'll be right back.
::Er-No rushes over to a palm tree and uses a mini-blade to chop the leaves down. He rushes back and hands one each to FM and Grix. Grix looks at FM sheepishly::
Er-No - Afix those to your genitals and I will set up camp.
::Grix goes into deep thought whilst FM walks over to a tree to find a solution::
Er-No - There - camp is set up.
::Grix and FM look over to a house of palm trees, equipped with a lit fire and 3 dead deers on a spitfire. They stare in awe::
Er-No - Let's eat!
-----
FM, Grix and er-no stopped dancing, and decided to keep moving, the dancing had been fun, but it wasn't achieving anything. As they set off, however, Grix's yelled out in pain "Yargghh!"
"What's wrong?" asked FM
"I stubbed my toe" replied Grix, still cursing.
The three of them looked down to see what Grix had hit.
They could see a lump of metal. It was quite clear that most of it was still buried, so er-no switched to digging mode, so they could see what it was clearly.
Whilst er-no dug Grix and FM spoke about pb.
"What do you think is the matter with him?"
"I don't know, it's not like him to turn on us and leave us to die, maybe he's sick."
"Sick? He's a bloody nutter! But he's alive, and we haven't got a clue what he'll do next!"
"I guess one of the other writer's will deal with that..."
er-no beebed. Twice.
"Ah, he's finished" Said FM, turning to look at er-no's work.
Before them was a long object, with a large hole in the top at one end.
"What is it?" asked Grix.
er-no replied "My analyse shows it to be a shoe."
"But it's metal!" said Grix
"It's the shoe of a robot" replied er-no.
"But it's huge! It's longer than me!"
"It's the shoe of a giant robot!" Replied er-no, before beeping four times to signify that the tea was ready.
"What's wrong?" asked FM
"I stubbed my toe" replied Grix, still cursing.
The three of them looked down to see what Grix had hit.
They could see a lump of metal. It was quite clear that most of it was still buried, so er-no switched to digging mode, so they could see what it was clearly.
Whilst er-no dug Grix and FM spoke about pb.
"What do you think is the matter with him?"
"I don't know, it's not like him to turn on us and leave us to die, maybe he's sick."
"Sick? He's a bloody nutter! But he's alive, and we haven't got a clue what he'll do next!"
"I guess one of the other writer's will deal with that..."
er-no beebed. Twice.
"Ah, he's finished" Said FM, turning to look at er-no's work.
Before them was a long object, with a large hole in the top at one end.
"What is it?" asked Grix.
er-no replied "My analyse shows it to be a shoe."
"But it's metal!" said Grix
"It's the shoe of a robot" replied er-no.
"But it's huge! It's longer than me!"
"It's the shoe of a giant robot!" Replied er-no, before beeping four times to signify that the tea was ready.
"became a speaker..." :0)
"We strut our funky stuff." Fm said, before spinning around, pressing a button on er-no's belly, and then dancing wildly in the middle of the desert.
Funk began to ooze from er-no, and his head opened up to reveal a set of multicoloured laser lights that beamed out into the darkness. His stomach became to pump bass out to the world.
The three of them danced, still unbeknowest to them, that they indeed were being watched...
A lone man watches from the top of a sandy hill nearby, binoculars in hand. He scratches his chin, and returns to his dune buggy, and speeds off in some odd direction.
Before long, the buggy reaches the forest, and follows the winding mud path through the trees, skidding and spurting muck into the air on every corner.
The buggy drives down a long straight, and towards a large rock mound in the centre of the forest.
The man pulls out a remote control that looks remarkably like a lady shaver with a large bottle top stuck on it, presses the button/coke bottle top, and the cave opens up, and allows the buggy to speed through.
The cave closes shut, leaving not a mark in the surface.
Funk began to ooze from er-no, and his head opened up to reveal a set of multicoloured laser lights that beamed out into the darkness. His stomach became to pump bass out to the world.
The three of them danced, still unbeknowest to them, that they indeed were being watched...
A lone man watches from the top of a sandy hill nearby, binoculars in hand. He scratches his chin, and returns to his dune buggy, and speeds off in some odd direction.
Before long, the buggy reaches the forest, and follows the winding mud path through the trees, skidding and spurting muck into the air on every corner.
The buggy drives down a long straight, and towards a large rock mound in the centre of the forest.
The man pulls out a remote control that looks remarkably like a lady shaver with a large bottle top stuck on it, presses the button/coke bottle top, and the cave opens up, and allows the buggy to speed through.
The cave closes shut, leaving not a mark in the surface.
The next think Pb remembers is waking up.
::Pb wakes up slowly and churns his head around - nobody is there::
Pb - Sniper? Sniper?
::There is no reply. Pb goes to the somewhat shattered mirror, but can manage to look at the back of his head and see to his surprise that there are no lumps and no marks of being hurt::
Pb - Wow! How did he do that?
Sniper - (shouts) I just used the generic rotary attache glock machine that I invented.
Pb - Invented? You're a scientist too?
Sniper - Indeed, but a new breed of scientist - we don't need to waste precious time sleeping or eating - we are machines!
Pb - Are you the only one?
::Sniper shakes his head::
Pb: Who?
::Sniper points to Pb's chest::
Sniper: Take off your shirt.
::Pb removes his shirt and Sniper pushes on Pb's chest and his chestplate springs open::
Pb - What have you done to me!?
Sniper - We are the future, Pb...
Pb - I like the way I am!
::Pb swings a hand at Sniper but he ducks it. Sniper lands a hard punch on Pb and he flies back into a cupboard of medical equipment. Pb grabs a spinning blade and smashes it about Sniper, but he misses again. Sniper snatches the blade and stabs it into Pb's chest. Sniper lays Pb on the operating table and presses some buttons on both of their chest plates. Sniper suddenly transforms into a clone of Pb::
-----
FM closes Er-No's chest plate and they continue walking through the vast area.
Grix - Do you think Pb is dead?
Er-No - The velocity of which you his him and the weight of the object allow me to conclude that he is terminated.
FM - Why don't you use the brain scan?
Grix - Oh yeah!
::Grix leans over Er-No and types some numbers into Er-No's LCD screen. A key appears:
Vital Life Signs For Team A
Grix - Alive
FM - Alive
Er-No - Alive
Sniper - Alive
::They all looked on avidly::
Pb - Alive
Er-No - He's alive - but that's impossible?
Grix - And who is Sniper?
Er-No - Someone has edited our team's log file and entered a new member. I will put on the map scan, so we can where our little friends are.
::Er-No makes two bleeping noises and 5 dots appear on the map::
FM - Well those three are us, so they must be Pb and "Sniper".
Grix - Why haven't we heard from Team B yet?
FM - Be patient - they will call on Er-No's external calling device.
Grix - What do we do in the mean time?
-----
::Pb wakes up slowly and churns his head around - nobody is there::
Pb - Sniper? Sniper?
::There is no reply. Pb goes to the somewhat shattered mirror, but can manage to look at the back of his head and see to his surprise that there are no lumps and no marks of being hurt::
Pb - Wow! How did he do that?
Sniper - (shouts) I just used the generic rotary attache glock machine that I invented.
Pb - Invented? You're a scientist too?
Sniper - Indeed, but a new breed of scientist - we don't need to waste precious time sleeping or eating - we are machines!
Pb - Are you the only one?
::Sniper shakes his head::
Pb: Who?
::Sniper points to Pb's chest::
Sniper: Take off your shirt.
::Pb removes his shirt and Sniper pushes on Pb's chest and his chestplate springs open::
Pb - What have you done to me!?
Sniper - We are the future, Pb...
Pb - I like the way I am!
::Pb swings a hand at Sniper but he ducks it. Sniper lands a hard punch on Pb and he flies back into a cupboard of medical equipment. Pb grabs a spinning blade and smashes it about Sniper, but he misses again. Sniper snatches the blade and stabs it into Pb's chest. Sniper lays Pb on the operating table and presses some buttons on both of their chest plates. Sniper suddenly transforms into a clone of Pb::
-----
FM closes Er-No's chest plate and they continue walking through the vast area.
Grix - Do you think Pb is dead?
Er-No - The velocity of which you his him and the weight of the object allow me to conclude that he is terminated.
FM - Why don't you use the brain scan?
Grix - Oh yeah!
::Grix leans over Er-No and types some numbers into Er-No's LCD screen. A key appears:
Vital Life Signs For Team A
Grix - Alive
FM - Alive
Er-No - Alive
Sniper - Alive
::They all looked on avidly::
Pb - Alive
Er-No - He's alive - but that's impossible?
Grix - And who is Sniper?
Er-No - Someone has edited our team's log file and entered a new member. I will put on the map scan, so we can where our little friends are.
::Er-No makes two bleeping noises and 5 dots appear on the map::
FM - Well those three are us, so they must be Pb and "Sniper".
Grix - Why haven't we heard from Team B yet?
FM - Be patient - they will call on Er-No's external calling device.
Grix - What do we do in the mean time?
-----
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