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FM looked at the control panel and watched the green oscilloscope wave illuminated on the darker green background. To be honest, he hadn’t really figured out what it did yet, but still liked to have it there going up and down at regular intervals. The ship was a deep space science vessel with three silver fins at the back and a nose that looked almost like some sort of kitchen impliment.
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
Page:
FM looked at the control panel and watched the green oscilloscope wave illuminated on the darker green background. To be honest, he hadn’t really figured out what it did yet, but still liked to have it there going up and down at regular intervals. The ship was a deep space science vessel with three silver fins at the back and a nose that looked almost like some sort of kitchen impliment.
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
Captain FM travelled through space with his three companions, looking for new sources for Earth’s ailing fuel situation and checking out other inhabitable planets. Doctor Grix, the medical officer was always interested in new herbs and alien medicines, the science advisor, Pb, was more interested in the aliens themselves and of course there was their faithful android Er-no, who had saved them from dangerous situations many times with his useful gadgets.
The door to the small main control room opened with a whoosh.
“Are we there yet?” asked Grix as he entered, wearing a fetching silver space suit with a nice little name badge obviously pinned through it.
“Only 100 light years to go, should be there in no time using the skip-drive’s mondo light speed.” Answered FM offhandedly.
“Well, does that mean that we can stop off at the blue planet I saw on the way? Only, I hadn’t seen it on any of the charts in the science lab and was kind of curious.” Said pb, poking his head round the corner.
“It may be worth scientific investigation, professor Zimmernicker would be interested back on Earth.“ said FM thoughtfully, looking at the scanner. “I’ll feed the details in to the computer…”
FM reached over to Er-no’s chest plate and pressed a few buttons. He pulled out a large blue cassette tape with ‘Earth – Co-ordinates’ written on it from the main computer and put in a see through green cassette in it’s place, taken from Er-no’s chest. Red green and blue lights flicked on and off on the console and a bleeping/whirring noise could be heard in the background. The ship jerked in a slightly different direction as flames appeared from the back like a small firework, it suddenly flew forward, almost seeming to slide through space towards the pastel blue planet in the distance.
--- - -
Grix looked out the portal at the nearing surface of the planet. “why are we going down so fast?”
“It seems that the gravitational pull from this planet is greater in the upper atmosphere due to the higher carbon in the air and the particles of Iron and Uridium being thrown up from the earth.” Responded pb as he read a row of counters that flicked up through a series of two digit numbers, virtually meaningless to everyone else.
“Landing in approximately 20 seconds…” said FM as they all put their seatbelts on.
The craft shuddered as it landed on the planet, almost seeming to be hanging in the air from a wire at times. As it touched down, the whole ship lurched and shook and a groaning noise warned the crew that something was wrong. Suddenly, everyone fell to one side as one of the three small metal legs snapped and the ship tipped over on it’s side.
“I believe we are stuck.” Said Captain FM, looking at the controls. He noticed, to his horror, that the oscilloscope wave had gone into overdrive for a few seconds, then virtually straightened out. “We haven’t got any spare parts that will fix this. I will radio for help, Grix, you and er-no head to that building I noticed in the distance. Take the buggy. We’ll stay to gather supplies and build a camp.”
::Grix and Er-No push with all their might on the door until it bursts open and they are able to slide out. Grix picks up the radio and taps it to eliminate any interference::
Grix - Anyone there? This is squadron 4 of Delta sector C - do you read?
::Grix bashes on the radio, but to no avail. A strange signal appears on the LCD display of the Radio. A slight interference comes off the speakers, and an audiable signal comes through::
Voice - (screaming) Get out of there - go to the hav...
Grix - Hav? What? Hello!?
::The signal goes dead. Grix slides down and shouts out to Er-No and Grix - they are too far in the distance to hear. Pb crawls along the floor in with two spilling cups in his hands::
Grix - A new herbal mix?
Pb - Yes - it's meant to enhance your wit and retain your inner monologue.
Grix - That's uncanny Pb! What do you call it?
Pb - Iridium Blend. Ah...
::Grix takes a sip of the drink::
Grix - So what's in this?
Pb - Oh (coughs) Carbon Dioxide mostly...
Grix - Good - I like Carbon Di...wait!
::Grix falls to the floor::
Pb - I truly am sorry I had to do this Grix, but I can't risk you leaving. Er-No and Grix are never going to make it back - we must get out of here - they were foolish enough to go out into that monstrosity without proper protection. This is Earth, right, so there must be some alloy components on this oversized dust particle.
::Pb slips on an overcoat and an oxygen mask and slips out the door and into the distance. Grix begins to stir. He pulls himself up by using the switchboard of the mainframe computer, but presses a button. Some music plays::
Grix - What in the world is this? It's raining men - what the heck? Must be the Intergalactic YMCA I suppose.
::Grix looks around::
Grix - Pb? Pb? You're using the old cloaker in the toilet joke again aren't you? What's this?
:: Grix walks over to the ajar door and a note is pasted to it, reading "Gon Lookin 4 Partz B Bak Soone"::
Grix - His hand-writing is terrible! So, what do I do now?
::Grix presses a button on the switchboard and "It's Raining Men" plays again. Grix dances around the room. He presses another button and a set of disco lights flash around the room::
-----
Grix - Anyone there? This is squadron 4 of Delta sector C - do you read?
::Grix bashes on the radio, but to no avail. A strange signal appears on the LCD display of the Radio. A slight interference comes off the speakers, and an audiable signal comes through::
Voice - (screaming) Get out of there - go to the hav...
Grix - Hav? What? Hello!?
::The signal goes dead. Grix slides down and shouts out to Er-No and Grix - they are too far in the distance to hear. Pb crawls along the floor in with two spilling cups in his hands::
Grix - A new herbal mix?
Pb - Yes - it's meant to enhance your wit and retain your inner monologue.
Grix - That's uncanny Pb! What do you call it?
Pb - Iridium Blend. Ah...
::Grix takes a sip of the drink::
Grix - So what's in this?
Pb - Oh (coughs) Carbon Dioxide mostly...
Grix - Good - I like Carbon Di...wait!
::Grix falls to the floor::
Pb - I truly am sorry I had to do this Grix, but I can't risk you leaving. Er-No and Grix are never going to make it back - we must get out of here - they were foolish enough to go out into that monstrosity without proper protection. This is Earth, right, so there must be some alloy components on this oversized dust particle.
::Pb slips on an overcoat and an oxygen mask and slips out the door and into the distance. Grix begins to stir. He pulls himself up by using the switchboard of the mainframe computer, but presses a button. Some music plays::
Grix - What in the world is this? It's raining men - what the heck? Must be the Intergalactic YMCA I suppose.
::Grix looks around::
Grix - Pb? Pb? You're using the old cloaker in the toilet joke again aren't you? What's this?
:: Grix walks over to the ajar door and a note is pasted to it, reading "Gon Lookin 4 Partz B Bak Soone"::
Grix - His hand-writing is terrible! So, what do I do now?
::Grix presses a button on the switchboard and "It's Raining Men" plays again. Grix dances around the room. He presses another button and a set of disco lights flash around the room::
-----
Oops - sorry.
::Grix and Er-No push with all their might on the door until it bursts open and they are able to slide out. Grix picks up the radio and taps it to eliminate any interference::
FM - Anyone there? This is squadron 4 of Delta sector C - do you read?
::FM bashes on the radio, but to no avail. A strange signal appears on the LCD display of the Radio. A slight interference comes off the speakers, and an audiable signal comes through::
Voice - (screaming) Get out of there - go to the hav...
FM - Hav? What? Hello!?
::The signal goes dead. FM slides down and shouts out to Er-No and Grix - they are too far in the distance to hear. Pb crawls along the floor in with two spilling cups in his hands::
FM - A new herbal mix?
Pb - Yes - it's meant to enhance your wit and retain your inner monologue.
FM - That's uncanny Pb! What do you call it?
Pb - Iridium Blend. Ah...
::FM takes a sip of the drink::
FM - So what's in this?
Pb - Oh (coughs) Carbon Dioxide mostly...
FM - Good - I like Carbon Di...wait!
::FM falls to the floor::
Pb - I truly am sorry I had to do this FM, but I can't risk you leaving. Er-No and Grix are never going to make it back - we must get out of here - they were foolish enough to go out into that monstrosity without proper protection. This is Earth, right, so there must be some alloy components on this oversized dust particle.
::Pb slips on an overcoat and an oxygen mask and slips out the door and into the distance. FM begins to stir. He pulls himself up by using the switchboard of the mainframe computer, but presses a button. Some music plays::
FM - What in the world is this? It's raining men - what the heck? Must be the Intergalactic YMCA I suppose.
::FM looks around::
FM - Pb? Pb? You're using the old cloaker in the toilet joke again aren't you? What's this?
::FM walks over to the ajar door and a note is pasted to it, reading "Gon Lookin 4 Partz B Bak Soone"::
FM - His hand-writing is terrible! So, what do I do now?
::FM presses a button on the switchboard and "It's Raining Men" plays again. FM dances around the room. He presses another button and a set of disco lights flash around the room::
-----
::Grix and Er-No push with all their might on the door until it bursts open and they are able to slide out. Grix picks up the radio and taps it to eliminate any interference::
FM - Anyone there? This is squadron 4 of Delta sector C - do you read?
::FM bashes on the radio, but to no avail. A strange signal appears on the LCD display of the Radio. A slight interference comes off the speakers, and an audiable signal comes through::
Voice - (screaming) Get out of there - go to the hav...
FM - Hav? What? Hello!?
::The signal goes dead. FM slides down and shouts out to Er-No and Grix - they are too far in the distance to hear. Pb crawls along the floor in with two spilling cups in his hands::
FM - A new herbal mix?
Pb - Yes - it's meant to enhance your wit and retain your inner monologue.
FM - That's uncanny Pb! What do you call it?
Pb - Iridium Blend. Ah...
::FM takes a sip of the drink::
FM - So what's in this?
Pb - Oh (coughs) Carbon Dioxide mostly...
FM - Good - I like Carbon Di...wait!
::FM falls to the floor::
Pb - I truly am sorry I had to do this FM, but I can't risk you leaving. Er-No and Grix are never going to make it back - we must get out of here - they were foolish enough to go out into that monstrosity without proper protection. This is Earth, right, so there must be some alloy components on this oversized dust particle.
::Pb slips on an overcoat and an oxygen mask and slips out the door and into the distance. FM begins to stir. He pulls himself up by using the switchboard of the mainframe computer, but presses a button. Some music plays::
FM - What in the world is this? It's raining men - what the heck? Must be the Intergalactic YMCA I suppose.
::FM looks around::
FM - Pb? Pb? You're using the old cloaker in the toilet joke again aren't you? What's this?
::FM walks over to the ajar door and a note is pasted to it, reading "Gon Lookin 4 Partz B Bak Soone"::
FM - His hand-writing is terrible! So, what do I do now?
::FM presses a button on the switchboard and "It's Raining Men" plays again. FM dances around the room. He presses another button and a set of disco lights flash around the room::
-----
Grix and Er-no were getting tired. And hungry. And thirsty. And they were slightly annoyed that they hadn’t seen Sniper die yet – that was always the highlight of their adventures.
They were standing in the middle of a field. A big dusty field with no grass. Just sand as far as the eye can see – as Grix points out later in the story, it is just like a giant sandpit.
Grix: You know what er-no? This place is rather like a giant sandpit.
Er-no: I’m hungry.
Grix: Where is that building we’re looking for anyway? FM said he saw it in the distance…not really very good directions really.
Er-no: I figured that I’d just follow you. Usually seems to work.
Grix: Oh. I was just going in the direction that we were facing when we got out of the hatch. I figured that, if we just walked in a long, straight line, we’d find something eventually.
Er-no: Grix, you stupid f**…BEEEEEEP, why the BEEEEP have I being following you the whole BEEEEEPin time? BEEPhead.
Grix: Where the hell was that beeping coming from?
The two looked around at the barren wasteland, totally bemused. There was nothing as far as the eye could see…yet that beeping had sounded extremely close.
Grix: What the BEEP? Is there a swear filter in this place?
Er-no: I think so!
The two look at each other, and smile. Getting past swear filters would be fun. They’d had a lot of practice in their childhood days back on earth.
Grix: Runt. Damn, it didn’t beep.
Er-no: Grix, you are a shiphead. Damnit, this is one sophisticated swear filter.
Grix: BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
Grix stopped to think of some more ‘naughty’ words.
Grix: BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. Playstation. OK, bored now. Lets stop messing about with this thing and just progress the story. We’ve probably managed to put half the audience to sleep anyway.
The two wandered across the desertland, on their way to no-where…
BTW - I hope thats long enough/good enough. Just shout at me if it isn't, OK?
They were standing in the middle of a field. A big dusty field with no grass. Just sand as far as the eye can see – as Grix points out later in the story, it is just like a giant sandpit.
Grix: You know what er-no? This place is rather like a giant sandpit.
Er-no: I’m hungry.
Grix: Where is that building we’re looking for anyway? FM said he saw it in the distance…not really very good directions really.
Er-no: I figured that I’d just follow you. Usually seems to work.
Grix: Oh. I was just going in the direction that we were facing when we got out of the hatch. I figured that, if we just walked in a long, straight line, we’d find something eventually.
Er-no: Grix, you stupid f**…BEEEEEEP, why the BEEEEP have I being following you the whole BEEEEEPin time? BEEPhead.
Grix: Where the hell was that beeping coming from?
The two looked around at the barren wasteland, totally bemused. There was nothing as far as the eye could see…yet that beeping had sounded extremely close.
Grix: What the BEEP? Is there a swear filter in this place?
Er-no: I think so!
The two look at each other, and smile. Getting past swear filters would be fun. They’d had a lot of practice in their childhood days back on earth.
Grix: Runt. Damn, it didn’t beep.
Er-no: Grix, you are a shiphead. Damnit, this is one sophisticated swear filter.
Grix: BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
Grix stopped to think of some more ‘naughty’ words.
Grix: BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. Playstation. OK, bored now. Lets stop messing about with this thing and just progress the story. We’ve probably managed to put half the audience to sleep anyway.
The two wandered across the desertland, on their way to no-where…
BTW - I hope thats long enough/good enough. Just shout at me if it isn't, OK?
"Warning, warning" said er-no, as Grix continued forward, not paying attention to er-no's spinning head and flailing arms, asuming that the warning would be of little relevance, as usual.
Unfortunately for Grix he should have taken er-no's advice, as the ground beneath him gave way, and he slid down, deep down and out of er-no's sight.
"Grix?" asked er-no, peering into the hole.
"Throw down the rope" replied Grix.
er-no beeped twice, in a higher pitch than usual, then from between his legs the end of a rope emerged. He allowed it to feed out to it's full length, not knowing how deep the hole might be.
"On second thoughts er-no, tie the rope to something, and lower yourself down, I could have found what we've been looking for." said Grix.
---------------------
"You were right Grix, this is exactly what we need! said er-no, now dangling from the end of the rope at the bottom of the hole. "Put as much as you can into my storage compartment, and I'll take it to the top"
----------------------
A flash of lightning lit up the sky, Grix could just about see it from the bottom of the hole, he could also see the silohette of a man, standing at the top.
"pb, FM, is that you?" he asked.
But there was no reply, only laughing as thunder crashed and sinister music played....
Unfortunately for Grix he should have taken er-no's advice, as the ground beneath him gave way, and he slid down, deep down and out of er-no's sight.
"Grix?" asked er-no, peering into the hole.
"Throw down the rope" replied Grix.
er-no beeped twice, in a higher pitch than usual, then from between his legs the end of a rope emerged. He allowed it to feed out to it's full length, not knowing how deep the hole might be.
"On second thoughts er-no, tie the rope to something, and lower yourself down, I could have found what we've been looking for." said Grix.
---------------------
"You were right Grix, this is exactly what we need! said er-no, now dangling from the end of the rope at the bottom of the hole. "Put as much as you can into my storage compartment, and I'll take it to the top"
----------------------
A flash of lightning lit up the sky, Grix could just about see it from the bottom of the hole, he could also see the silohette of a man, standing at the top.
"pb, FM, is that you?" he asked.
But there was no reply, only laughing as thunder crashed and sinister music played....
::The figure comes into view from the lightning::
Er-No - Pb? What are you doing here?
Pb - I'm looking for parts for the ship.
Grix - Well, we were delegated to that job - why did you come out?
Pb - Well, I thought I'd leave Grix to it - he was a little sleepy.
Er-No - Right, so you came looking for us too?
Pb - Yes...
Grix - Oh, thank Intergalatic Space Entity!
Pb - But not to save you...
::Everything stops dead::
Grix - Then for what?
Pb - I can't let you find the parts, because then you will have to take the credit for my work! I can't let you spoil my life's work! You see that scrap metal there?
Er-No - Yes?
Pb - Give it to me.
Er-No: But it's our jo...
Pb - Just do it! Or, you won't see the light of day again.
::Pb brandishes a knife and brings it close to Er-No's rope. He begins to cut::
Grix - Ok - here you go.
::Grix throws the metal and Pb catches it::
Pb - Right, thank you, but I'm afraid you're never getting out of here.
::Pb cuts begins to cut the rope::
Er-No - Pb - you don't know what you're doing. Stop this instant!
::Pb continues cutting until the rope is broken::
Pb - So long...friends.
::A darl figure emerges behind Pb::
Grix - Pb - look behind you!
Pb - Meh - do you think I'm going to fall for that?
::A shovel comes into view and the figure blasts Pb round the head with the shovel. Pb collapses to the floor and the figure checks Pb's pulse::
Er-No - Help us! Hello? Anyone?
::Lightning strikes again and the figure comes into view::
Grix - FM!
FM - Let's get you out of there.
Er-No: How can you get us out?
FM - We'll find a way guys, we will.
Er-No - Pb? What are you doing here?
Pb - I'm looking for parts for the ship.
Grix - Well, we were delegated to that job - why did you come out?
Pb - Well, I thought I'd leave Grix to it - he was a little sleepy.
Er-No - Right, so you came looking for us too?
Pb - Yes...
Grix - Oh, thank Intergalatic Space Entity!
Pb - But not to save you...
::Everything stops dead::
Grix - Then for what?
Pb - I can't let you find the parts, because then you will have to take the credit for my work! I can't let you spoil my life's work! You see that scrap metal there?
Er-No - Yes?
Pb - Give it to me.
Er-No: But it's our jo...
Pb - Just do it! Or, you won't see the light of day again.
::Pb brandishes a knife and brings it close to Er-No's rope. He begins to cut::
Grix - Ok - here you go.
::Grix throws the metal and Pb catches it::
Pb - Right, thank you, but I'm afraid you're never getting out of here.
::Pb cuts begins to cut the rope::
Er-No - Pb - you don't know what you're doing. Stop this instant!
::Pb continues cutting until the rope is broken::
Pb - So long...friends.
::A darl figure emerges behind Pb::
Grix - Pb - look behind you!
Pb - Meh - do you think I'm going to fall for that?
::A shovel comes into view and the figure blasts Pb round the head with the shovel. Pb collapses to the floor and the figure checks Pb's pulse::
Er-No - Help us! Hello? Anyone?
::Lightning strikes again and the figure comes into view::
Grix - FM!
FM - Let's get you out of there.
Er-No: How can you get us out?
FM - We'll find a way guys, we will.
"BEEP me, this is all going a bit fast, isn't it?" Grix shouted, as they ran on through the sand... trying to keep his voice above the sound of the rain and thunder.
"I think..." FM paused to catch his breath, "We've just gone so slowly in the past, this is all a bit of a shock to us."
"Malfunction. Bah."
Grix and FM stopped running and looked behind.
"Damnit! The 1985 series wasn't made to be water-proof!" FM shaked his fist at the sky. "Damn you Professor Berkface!"
"Did he create er-no?" Grix asked.
"No, he came up with the "If something can go wrong, it will" princible." FM replied, watching as er-no began to try to run as he lay on his face in the sand.
FM and Grix began to help er-no to his feet. "Good golly, we'll be late for the premier! Have you brushed your teeth? We must look good for the cameras Peter, we must."
"Why's he speaking in a cockney accent?" Grix asked.
"But I only wanted to look after the rabbits George, I didn't mean to hurt them." er-no answered, changing his accent again.
Grix looked around as he began to help er-no...
"What's wrong Grix?" FM asked.
"I don't know... it's... even since we landed, I've had this strange feeling that we're being watched..."
"God bless us, every one." er-no said.
"I think..." FM paused to catch his breath, "We've just gone so slowly in the past, this is all a bit of a shock to us."
"Malfunction. Bah."
Grix and FM stopped running and looked behind.
"Damnit! The 1985 series wasn't made to be water-proof!" FM shaked his fist at the sky. "Damn you Professor Berkface!"
"Did he create er-no?" Grix asked.
"No, he came up with the "If something can go wrong, it will" princible." FM replied, watching as er-no began to try to run as he lay on his face in the sand.
FM and Grix began to help er-no to his feet. "Good golly, we'll be late for the premier! Have you brushed your teeth? We must look good for the cameras Peter, we must."
"Why's he speaking in a cockney accent?" Grix asked.
"But I only wanted to look after the rabbits George, I didn't mean to hurt them." er-no answered, changing his accent again.
Grix looked around as he began to help er-no...
"What's wrong Grix?" FM asked.
"I don't know... it's... even since we landed, I've had this strange feeling that we're being watched..."
"God bless us, every one." er-no said.
pb awoke in darkness.
Well, almost darkness, the moon was dull in the sky, but there was enough light to see a little in front of himself.
pb clutched his head, it was spinning, and he felt quite sick. Upon touching the back of his head he discovered a nasty lump, and a sticky patch of blood. He was no longer bleeding heavily, but he felt he may have lost a lot of blood.
pb began to head back towards the ship, leaving the precious parts behind, in order to seek help from the medical robots on board.
-----------------
FM reached deep inside er-no's cranial core.
Grix watched, bemused, as er-no's eyes span like reels on a fruit machine.
"Got it" said FM pulling out a handful of wires covering in a white goo. "He should be functioning normally again in just a moment".
------------------
pb sat down on the chair in the lab and switched on the power for the medical robots. he waited for a while, but nothing seemed to happen. The sound of metal on metal alarmed pb, that wasn't ordinary, most of the ship's walls were stiff cardboard.
Looking into the doorway pb saw a deformed hand reach around for the light switch. After a second of fumbling it was off.
"I am Sniper" came the voice of a man that had now stepped into the doorway. pb could not see him clearly in the darkness, but was aware that this man was anything other than normal.
"Lay down on the medi-table, and allow me to see to yuor wounds" said Sniper.
pb did as he asked, though it may not have been his will to do so. Something in Snipers voice had left him with no ability to think for himself, would it really be wise to let a stranger give you medical assistance? By the time pb had thought things through clearly he was already feeling the effects of a heavy anaesthetic, one he could not remember being administered, and he fell into a state of unconsiousness.
Well, almost darkness, the moon was dull in the sky, but there was enough light to see a little in front of himself.
pb clutched his head, it was spinning, and he felt quite sick. Upon touching the back of his head he discovered a nasty lump, and a sticky patch of blood. He was no longer bleeding heavily, but he felt he may have lost a lot of blood.
pb began to head back towards the ship, leaving the precious parts behind, in order to seek help from the medical robots on board.
-----------------
FM reached deep inside er-no's cranial core.
Grix watched, bemused, as er-no's eyes span like reels on a fruit machine.
"Got it" said FM pulling out a handful of wires covering in a white goo. "He should be functioning normally again in just a moment".
------------------
pb sat down on the chair in the lab and switched on the power for the medical robots. he waited for a while, but nothing seemed to happen. The sound of metal on metal alarmed pb, that wasn't ordinary, most of the ship's walls were stiff cardboard.
Looking into the doorway pb saw a deformed hand reach around for the light switch. After a second of fumbling it was off.
"I am Sniper" came the voice of a man that had now stepped into the doorway. pb could not see him clearly in the darkness, but was aware that this man was anything other than normal.
"Lay down on the medi-table, and allow me to see to yuor wounds" said Sniper.
pb did as he asked, though it may not have been his will to do so. Something in Snipers voice had left him with no ability to think for himself, would it really be wise to let a stranger give you medical assistance? By the time pb had thought things through clearly he was already feeling the effects of a heavy anaesthetic, one he could not remember being administered, and he fell into a state of unconsiousness.
The next think Pb remembers is waking up.
::Pb wakes up slowly and churns his head around - nobody is there::
Pb - Sniper? Sniper?
::There is no reply. Pb goes to the somewhat shattered mirror, but can manage to look at the back of his head and see to his surprise that there are no lumps and no marks of being hurt::
Pb - Wow! How did he do that?
Sniper - (shouts) I just used the generic rotary attache glock machine that I invented.
Pb - Invented? You're a scientist too?
Sniper - Indeed, but a new breed of scientist - we don't need to waste precious time sleeping or eating - we are machines!
Pb - Are you the only one?
::Sniper shakes his head::
Pb: Who?
::Sniper points to Pb's chest::
Sniper: Take off your shirt.
::Pb removes his shirt and Sniper pushes on Pb's chest and his chestplate springs open::
Pb - What have you done to me!?
Sniper - We are the future, Pb...
Pb - I like the way I am!
::Pb swings a hand at Sniper but he ducks it. Sniper lands a hard punch on Pb and he flies back into a cupboard of medical equipment. Pb grabs a spinning blade and smashes it about Sniper, but he misses again. Sniper snatches the blade and stabs it into Pb's chest. Sniper lays Pb on the operating table and presses some buttons on both of their chest plates. Sniper suddenly transforms into a clone of Pb::
-----
FM closes Er-No's chest plate and they continue walking through the vast area.
Grix - Do you think Pb is dead?
Er-No - The velocity of which you his him and the weight of the object allow me to conclude that he is terminated.
FM - Why don't you use the brain scan?
Grix - Oh yeah!
::Grix leans over Er-No and types some numbers into Er-No's LCD screen. A key appears:
Vital Life Signs For Team A
Grix - Alive
FM - Alive
Er-No - Alive
Sniper - Alive
::They all looked on avidly::
Pb - Alive
Er-No - He's alive - but that's impossible?
Grix - And who is Sniper?
Er-No - Someone has edited our team's log file and entered a new member. I will put on the map scan, so we can where our little friends are.
::Er-No makes two bleeping noises and 5 dots appear on the map::
FM - Well those three are us, so they must be Pb and "Sniper".
Grix - Why haven't we heard from Team B yet?
FM - Be patient - they will call on Er-No's external calling device.
Grix - What do we do in the mean time?
-----
::Pb wakes up slowly and churns his head around - nobody is there::
Pb - Sniper? Sniper?
::There is no reply. Pb goes to the somewhat shattered mirror, but can manage to look at the back of his head and see to his surprise that there are no lumps and no marks of being hurt::
Pb - Wow! How did he do that?
Sniper - (shouts) I just used the generic rotary attache glock machine that I invented.
Pb - Invented? You're a scientist too?
Sniper - Indeed, but a new breed of scientist - we don't need to waste precious time sleeping or eating - we are machines!
Pb - Are you the only one?
::Sniper shakes his head::
Pb: Who?
::Sniper points to Pb's chest::
Sniper: Take off your shirt.
::Pb removes his shirt and Sniper pushes on Pb's chest and his chestplate springs open::
Pb - What have you done to me!?
Sniper - We are the future, Pb...
Pb - I like the way I am!
::Pb swings a hand at Sniper but he ducks it. Sniper lands a hard punch on Pb and he flies back into a cupboard of medical equipment. Pb grabs a spinning blade and smashes it about Sniper, but he misses again. Sniper snatches the blade and stabs it into Pb's chest. Sniper lays Pb on the operating table and presses some buttons on both of their chest plates. Sniper suddenly transforms into a clone of Pb::
-----
FM closes Er-No's chest plate and they continue walking through the vast area.
Grix - Do you think Pb is dead?
Er-No - The velocity of which you his him and the weight of the object allow me to conclude that he is terminated.
FM - Why don't you use the brain scan?
Grix - Oh yeah!
::Grix leans over Er-No and types some numbers into Er-No's LCD screen. A key appears:
Vital Life Signs For Team A
Grix - Alive
FM - Alive
Er-No - Alive
Sniper - Alive
::They all looked on avidly::
Pb - Alive
Er-No - He's alive - but that's impossible?
Grix - And who is Sniper?
Er-No - Someone has edited our team's log file and entered a new member. I will put on the map scan, so we can where our little friends are.
::Er-No makes two bleeping noises and 5 dots appear on the map::
FM - Well those three are us, so they must be Pb and "Sniper".
Grix - Why haven't we heard from Team B yet?
FM - Be patient - they will call on Er-No's external calling device.
Grix - What do we do in the mean time?
-----
"We strut our funky stuff." Fm said, before spinning around, pressing a button on er-no's belly, and then dancing wildly in the middle of the desert.
Funk began to ooze from er-no, and his head opened up to reveal a set of multicoloured laser lights that beamed out into the darkness. His stomach became to pump bass out to the world.
The three of them danced, still unbeknowest to them, that they indeed were being watched...
A lone man watches from the top of a sandy hill nearby, binoculars in hand. He scratches his chin, and returns to his dune buggy, and speeds off in some odd direction.
Before long, the buggy reaches the forest, and follows the winding mud path through the trees, skidding and spurting muck into the air on every corner.
The buggy drives down a long straight, and towards a large rock mound in the centre of the forest.
The man pulls out a remote control that looks remarkably like a lady shaver with a large bottle top stuck on it, presses the button/coke bottle top, and the cave opens up, and allows the buggy to speed through.
The cave closes shut, leaving not a mark in the surface.
Funk began to ooze from er-no, and his head opened up to reveal a set of multicoloured laser lights that beamed out into the darkness. His stomach became to pump bass out to the world.
The three of them danced, still unbeknowest to them, that they indeed were being watched...
A lone man watches from the top of a sandy hill nearby, binoculars in hand. He scratches his chin, and returns to his dune buggy, and speeds off in some odd direction.
Before long, the buggy reaches the forest, and follows the winding mud path through the trees, skidding and spurting muck into the air on every corner.
The buggy drives down a long straight, and towards a large rock mound in the centre of the forest.
The man pulls out a remote control that looks remarkably like a lady shaver with a large bottle top stuck on it, presses the button/coke bottle top, and the cave opens up, and allows the buggy to speed through.
The cave closes shut, leaving not a mark in the surface.
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