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"The wonder of Partridge"

For anyone who hasn't seen any Alan Partirdge material, you gotta check it out. Truly Steve Coogan is a comical genius. I would like to start a new topic devoted to the king of chat.

I'll start with my favourite moment:

Scene - Alan is at Tandy's at an exclusive 'after-hours' Christmas shop. He checks out a CD player and pushes the open button.

"That's a nice action."

He does it again.

"That IS a nice action"

He does it once more. He's decided.

"Yep, that's a quality action. But I've got one."

It might not sound that funny actually but it is.

You need four more messages; here goes! (I dunno if these have already been said actually.. but.. er.. nevermind)

"It appears to be happy hour at pete and bernies philisophical inn"

"dont sing susan, it sounds bad"

flipping mentalists =]

Get this topic to 100 and I'll leave you alone!

"Y-you-you've missed a bit, like."

"I've just been eating some mousse."

Scum, sub-human scum.

Ahaaa!

Sorry, I was just portraying a madman.

Mr. Hawk, I sentence you to death, by hanging. And don't try to...hover up, so the rope goes slack. Cos they could do that, couldn't they? They could hover. So I suppose the most humane way to execute a bird of prey is death by firing squad.

Owl Sanctuary.

A pipe of Pringles should suffice.

My licence is clean, yours is diiirty.
You've got six points, I've got two (gestures at small traffic cone t*****s) points.
I got these from a road safety test centre.