Viewing Thread:
"Kids in movies: DIE DIE DIE"

[URL]http://www.theshiznit.co.uk[/URL]

Now here's something I'm sure we can all agree on - kids in movies SUCK. They need to be erased from movie history, kept in cupboards til they're 16 or something.

Warning: this story contains some brutal child-harming fantasies that CrossBob may find offensive.

The Media rams Fanning because they're just waiting for her "to do a Barrymore", i.e. follow in the footsteps of Drew Barrymore who experimented with alcohol and drugs at 11.

Rai wrote:
> "Mr Skywalker

hahahahah

Dakota Fanning does have look scared/upset/crying/stupidly smiley, down to a fine art.

I hate how people in the media completely rim-shot Dakota Fanning. She's a pretty average child actress, and seems "too intelligent" in her interviews, spouting the aforementioned pretentious crap about how roles x and y were challenging. Wow, you ran away whilst Tom Cruise held your hand. Grats, here's a cookie. Now sod off.

*shudder* That jedi kid in Star Wars: Episode III.

"Mr Skywalker, they have us surrounded, what should we do?"

Said as though he'd just got the line and didn't know how to pronounce skywalker. Which, he probably didn't.

What about River Phoenix? He was great in Stand By Me and you all know it.

Freddy Highmore's excellent in Finding Neverland.

Though I can't stand the kid in the original Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, or Haley Joel Mongtard.

The kid that irritates me the most: That stupid tattooed imp from Waterworld.

Now, I'll admit to having a small amount of liking for Waterworld. Sorry about that and all. I do, however, hate the kid. She's so wooden - and yet she cannot float. Bint.

"He'll come for me, he will" - Shut up, imp-face.

P.S Shiznit is excellent, everyone shut up. Except Snuggly - you keep writing

Exceptions to the rule:

1. The kid in Monsters Inc.
2. Dakota Fanning in anything
3. Christina Ricci in the Addams Family

Strafio wrote:

> Instead of quoting "netiquette", how about realise where it
> comes from?

that's the most brilliant mix of condescending and geeky i've ever seen.
kudos!

In short: he rules and you don't.