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"Cowboys or Pirates or Zombies?"

Who would win in a knife fight?

Discuss.

Are they actually trained, though?

Pirates, trained with a sword.

however zombies are dead, therefore unkillable?

Also they could potentiall be pirate zombies.

I'm reluctant to introduce robots.

Depends who has the biggest knife.

Zombies are too slow though.

Well, Pirates, obviously.
The only ones with any real blade experience.

I'd say pirates since they are like trained to fight with blades.

Jesus looked a bit like a pirate, so I'm going with the zombies.

Undead, you know.

...like Jesus.

I need to find an illustrated Bible with a picture of Jesus in a cowboy hat. That would render this topic OBSOLETE.

Who would win in a knife fight?

Discuss.