Viewing Thread:
"Open Water - A Review"

"Hey Yuppie Wife, we hardly communicate anymore due to the pressures of our work and materialistic life. I demonstrate this by using my mobile to phone you even though you're in the house and I'm in the car"
"Hey Yuppie Husband, I don't want to sex you even in this exotic resort. Let's go scuba-diving"
"Yes"
"The boat's gone. What do we do now?"
"Let's bicker and float about"
"It's all your fault"
"No it's yours"
"The audience hates us both and wants to see us eaten"
"I've just been bitten Yuppie Wife"
"Just a nibble. Let's go to sleep"
"Ok"
"Oh no, Yuppie Husband has died from his bite. I can no longer face life, despite only being out here for 24hrs. I shall drown myself."

Awful, dull waste of rental.
The box said "substained terror" on the back.
It should've said "Mild disappointment & vague resentment"

i'm glad this post gave away the ending, it saves me enduring the movie :)

Some movies, you just know will be crud. Examples:

2 fast to furious
torque
biker boys

Total junk. I haven't actually seen these movies. They're just the one I could think of off the top of my head. Its obvious they suck anyway. Films for chavs. Its not even enjoyable fluff. Like commando or something.

Mr Snuggly wrote:
> It's funk-tastic love. Very important, it's a play on his
> name, see?

I thought that's what he said, but then I thought, "nah, professional writers and directors and such have proof read this movie. Surely nothing that bad can get through".

I think he evens says "P*ss off" in one of his funktastic scenes. And the number plate on the Nazi's car said "Naz1".

English_Bloke wrote:
> "Lucky for you this little bit of crumpet has come back begging
> for some of my fantastic love"
>
> AHAHAHA!

It's funk-tastic love. Very important, it's a play on his name, see?

Goatboy wrote:
> It can't be as stupid as "The Day After Tomorrow".
> That almost wins the "dumbest waste of millions of dollars"
> award, narrowly pipped to the post by Tomb Raider - which I can't
> bring myself to watch beyond the 1st 10 minutes, even when it was
> free on television a couple of days ago.

Yeah, but it doesn't have Stifler fighting Chow Yun Fat while trying not to spill his bowl of Coco Pops.

"Lucky for you this little bit of crumpet has come back begging for some of my fantastic love"

AHAHAHA!

Bulletproof Monk is one of those odd films.




That's it.

It can't be as stupid as "The Day After Tomorrow".
That almost wins the "dumbest waste of millions of dollars" award, narrowly pipped to the post by Tomb Raider - which I can't bring myself to watch beyond the 1st 10 minutes, even when it was free on television a couple of days ago.

Ah, Bulletproof Monk - a film so bad, it's a miracle it doesn't have Steven Seagal in it somewhere. I'll say it again for old time's sake... there's a mock-British character in it called Mr. Funktastic and he calls a girl 'crumpet'. Fantastic.

It's honestly worth watching because it's so bad. Not worth paying to watch it though, God no.