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I've recently broken up with another girlfriend, which is its essence doesn't bother me, because basically it wasn't working out, didnt feel right and we've decided to remain friends which is always good.
The thing that happens to be bugging me is that after we broke up she told me she loved me (actually "in love" not just the sort of 'love' you stick at the end of an email or text) and that she wants to have a baby with me.
Cue fear of fatherhood and the realisation I'm actually just a kid myself to kick in.
The thing that quite worries me is that I haven't known this girl a great deal of time at all. We met at a party, got drunk and did some stuff together and we started going out, but after a while (once I'd sobered up) I didnt feel the same and chose to end it to avoid and later heartache from prolonging the relationship. She took it badly. Really badly. With cries of "don't you find me attractive?" and "what have I done wrong" ringing through my head, I came back with the clichéd-to-death, "its not you, its me" which seemed to settle her down.
I've actually never been told by a girl that she "loved" me, nor have I ever said it to a girl. I'm quite pedantic with the word and beleive it should only be used when you mean it, and she assured me she does love me. This is rather daunting to think that someone who has known me a pretty short amount of time feels that way about me. What's even more frightening is that I don't feel the same way, at all.
I suppose I can finally empathise with those who stalk people and fall in love with them without really knowing them, and the other party is completely oblivious to this. I always though love would be something that came mutually from both parties, but I guess that isn't the case.
I'm not sure if I should feel bad about this, but I really do. I dislike hurting people, but I think I did the right thing to end it before she went skitzo and came off the pill and got pregnant to have the child she's oh-so-desperate to have.
Goes to show that you can be all mature and grown-up but still be a child yourself in some respects.
I'm still a child, I guess, but I like the security and lack of morning sickness it brings.
The thing that happens to be bugging me is that after we broke up she told me she loved me (actually "in love" not just the sort of 'love' you stick at the end of an email or text) and that she wants to have a baby with me.
Cue fear of fatherhood and the realisation I'm actually just a kid myself to kick in.
The thing that quite worries me is that I haven't known this girl a great deal of time at all. We met at a party, got drunk and did some stuff together and we started going out, but after a while (once I'd sobered up) I didnt feel the same and chose to end it to avoid and later heartache from prolonging the relationship. She took it badly. Really badly. With cries of "don't you find me attractive?" and "what have I done wrong" ringing through my head, I came back with the clichéd-to-death, "its not you, its me" which seemed to settle her down.
I've actually never been told by a girl that she "loved" me, nor have I ever said it to a girl. I'm quite pedantic with the word and beleive it should only be used when you mean it, and she assured me she does love me. This is rather daunting to think that someone who has known me a pretty short amount of time feels that way about me. What's even more frightening is that I don't feel the same way, at all.
I suppose I can finally empathise with those who stalk people and fall in love with them without really knowing them, and the other party is completely oblivious to this. I always though love would be something that came mutually from both parties, but I guess that isn't the case.
I'm not sure if I should feel bad about this, but I really do. I dislike hurting people, but I think I did the right thing to end it before she went skitzo and came off the pill and got pregnant to have the child she's oh-so-desperate to have.
Goes to show that you can be all mature and grown-up but still be a child yourself in some respects.
I'm still a child, I guess, but I like the security and lack of morning sickness it brings.
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On a related topic, I broke up with my girlfriend today.
All she wanted was physical contact.
All she wanted was physical contact.
:-D
PrinceCharming wrote:
> Lawrence is a sex goddess.
Oh-er.
> Lawrence is a sex goddess.
Oh-er.
Lawrence is a sex goddess.
Notorious Biggles wrote:
> Lawrence wrote:
> Relationships are strange. I don't think i'm very good at them
> though
> because i like to argue a little and my past boyfriends have always
> been 'ok your right, i'm sorry' when they never were, I hate it when
> blokes don't argue back, you know they are a real man when they
> argue
> back. I went out with someone for a year and a half and we argued
> constantly, but we got on so well too. He is the only one who argued
> back and never took it too seriously. I'm not talking about blazing
> rows in the street, but like what to have for lunch and who's turn
> is
> it to make the coffee.
>
> I hope you don't mean that you have to argue back to be a
> "real" man. For instance, consider my mate Ped and the
> un-friendly neighbourhood football hooligan. One argues back. A lot.
> One is a chilled out super soldier who seems to think we're still in
> the 1920's. Only one of them makes a fuss about where to go for
> lunch.
>
> See, there is a fine line between caring about the things that matter
> to you, i.e. passion, and just being argumentative. Passion is good,
> being argumentative isn't.
> But yeah, my main point here Lawri was I'm hoping you don't use being
> argumentative as a requirement for going out with someone. Because if
> you do, you'll end up finding lots of cavemen.
No, i just mean that a relationship gets boring when you get your own way all the time. I'm quite a selfish person and do like things my own way, but if i was with someone who accepted that and did what i wanted all the time it gets a bit pointless and boring. Personally i like a man who will turn round and say 'no, i'm seeing my mates tonight' but obviously if he's like that ALL the time he's gotta go! Relationships have gotta be equal.
Also, i'm not talking about proper arguments like, 'your dumped!!!' but like, little bickering which we laugh about later.
Also, i gues your right, ineedsleep, about the baby thing, just i don't know any girl who don't want a baby!
> Lawrence wrote:
> Relationships are strange. I don't think i'm very good at them
> though
> because i like to argue a little and my past boyfriends have always
> been 'ok your right, i'm sorry' when they never were, I hate it when
> blokes don't argue back, you know they are a real man when they
> argue
> back. I went out with someone for a year and a half and we argued
> constantly, but we got on so well too. He is the only one who argued
> back and never took it too seriously. I'm not talking about blazing
> rows in the street, but like what to have for lunch and who's turn
> is
> it to make the coffee.
>
> I hope you don't mean that you have to argue back to be a
> "real" man. For instance, consider my mate Ped and the
> un-friendly neighbourhood football hooligan. One argues back. A lot.
> One is a chilled out super soldier who seems to think we're still in
> the 1920's. Only one of them makes a fuss about where to go for
> lunch.
>
> See, there is a fine line between caring about the things that matter
> to you, i.e. passion, and just being argumentative. Passion is good,
> being argumentative isn't.
> But yeah, my main point here Lawri was I'm hoping you don't use being
> argumentative as a requirement for going out with someone. Because if
> you do, you'll end up finding lots of cavemen.
No, i just mean that a relationship gets boring when you get your own way all the time. I'm quite a selfish person and do like things my own way, but if i was with someone who accepted that and did what i wanted all the time it gets a bit pointless and boring. Personally i like a man who will turn round and say 'no, i'm seeing my mates tonight' but obviously if he's like that ALL the time he's gotta go! Relationships have gotta be equal.
Also, i'm not talking about proper arguments like, 'your dumped!!!' but like, little bickering which we laugh about later.
Also, i gues your right, ineedsleep, about the baby thing, just i don't know any girl who don't want a baby!
caveat wrote:
> [URL]http://balr0g.free.fr/hfr/img/stfu2.jpg[/URL]
Brilliant. Quite brilliant.
> [URL]http://balr0g.free.fr/hfr/img/stfu2.jpg[/URL]
Brilliant. Quite brilliant.
Goaty, I urge you to compile a leaflet.
cos hes a noteable, instead of a newbie or regular
why is your name a funny colour goatboy?
Light wrote:
> Heh. Think of me as the socially acceptible version of Goatboy's
> advice. But trust me on this; he's 100% correct. As a direct result
> of following the 12 step Goatboy recovery process, I'm now with
> someone I absolutely adore and whom I can be myself with.
---
You have a point sir, I much prefer the cardigan wearing gay version of Light to the teen-angst hand-wringing version of a year ago.
I'm thinking about setting up a self-help seminar group for confused and downtrodden males.
Anybody that's seen Magnolia will get the general gist of my plan.
> Heh. Think of me as the socially acceptible version of Goatboy's
> advice. But trust me on this; he's 100% correct. As a direct result
> of following the 12 step Goatboy recovery process, I'm now with
> someone I absolutely adore and whom I can be myself with.
---
You have a point sir, I much prefer the cardigan wearing gay version of Light to the teen-angst hand-wringing version of a year ago.
I'm thinking about setting up a self-help seminar group for confused and downtrodden males.
Anybody that's seen Magnolia will get the general gist of my plan.
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