Viewing Thread:
"Hello, I'm ugly and I like to f **k horses."

*Throws up*

Holy mother in hell.

"Oh I must have been around 22 the first time I allowed a dog to have sexual intercourse with"

"Technically, I was a virgin until I was 29, up until then I was a zooblah blah"

*VOMITS*

Sh.t the bed this is sick.
WHERE THE HELL IS MY REMOTE?!!!?

Mattributé wrote:
> Both hands are needed.
>
> How else am I going to use the tissues?

Do you really need them?

Mattributé wrote:
> ~Darling~ wrote:
> You just said! YOU.JUST.SAID.
>
> That doesn't mean you have to rub it in.
>
> And I could lie.

I can see why people lie about getting bed action, but not getting any??

Both hands are needed.

How else am I going to use the tissues?

I believe his sexual situation is much like a 100M sprint race clock.

The little hand is very busy for a few seconds, it's all over quick and the other hand isn't even needed.

~Darling~ wrote:
> You just said! YOU.JUST.SAID.

That doesn't mean you have to rub it in.

And I could lie.

Mattributé wrote:
> ~Darling~ wrote:
> That is also true!
>
> How do you know? Eh? Do you KNOW my sexual situation?

You just said! YOU.JUST.SAID.

I do (it’s non-existent)

She does...

Flop

~Darling~ wrote:
> That is also true!

How do you know? Eh? Do you KNOW my sexual situation?

Mattributé wrote:
> ~Darling~ wrote:
> Why must you?
>
> I'd have done it to anyone, but why must you leave yourself so open
> to it?

Fair point your forgiven-for now...

> Think about it. This is the closest thing I'm going to get to sex
> this year.

That is also true!