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"My Message"

I sit here feeling strained, knowing I have the ambition to do something creative of epic proportions. I want to write, I love writing but most of all I want to make a difference with my writing. I want to write something that will live on after I have died for people to remember me by; a timeless classic novel or a book of enduring usefulness.

The though of dying and being forgotten suffocates me. Some people are quite content to live out their life in relative happiness, die and then be forgotten. I want to leave behind me a legacy. I want people to read something I have written and for it to speak volumes to them. I want to make a difference to the lives of people; but I do not know how.

I sit here at my computer most nights with a blank word document open, wanting to begin my masterpiece. Longing for my fingers to spring to life and begin tapping down the jumbles mass of emotion, creativity and vitriol that is my thumping unconscious in a legible fashion. I keep a pen and paper by my bedside in case a dream clarifies what it is I am meant to write about. What I am meant to bring to the world that I feel is going to be so important. If I were a spiritual person I would probably say it was my destiny to convey this message that sits encoded in the back of my mind, always a few inches from the tip of my proverbial tongue; but so far it hasn’t made itself clear enough to scribble down on paper.

My jumbled assortment of poetry, discourses and stories each hold an element of what I am trying to reveal, but the big picture is far from complete. It pains me to think that I may never discover what it is I feel the need to express so badly. I have tried philosophising, stabbing in the dark at huge issues such as the meaning of life or the size of the universe. Issues I feel uncouth of someone of my education to even ponder with any degree of seriousness. But I will continue to explore every issue under the sun until I probe deep enough into my psyche to uncover the message I have to offer the world. Something I need to uncover for the sake of my ever failing sanity.

Cyclone wrote:
> Oo, thank you FFF. It was the 'Old Mill' one, in the city.
>
> I'm waiting for praise, or else I'll do a Paradox-esque knife
> slicing.
>
> Give it to me straight, honey

Not only do you steal my knifings but yoy steal my "esque"!

Mav wrote:
> That's the point of ALL poetry.
>
> It's meant to be pretentious.


Lol, it's funny because it's true :^D

Oo, thank you FFF. It was the 'Old Mill' one, in the city.

I'm waiting for praise, or else I'll do a Paradox-esque knife slicing.

Give it to me straight, honey

[S]As in 'I have a bad memory', rather than that story was a bad memory.

Don't kill yourself just yet

Cyclone wrote:
> Read my SSC6 story, you scally-wag.
>
> I'm beginning to hate it, as I normally do.

All in good time.

Just don't think about it. Stop! Stop it!
Funny though, I don't remember not liking anything you've written if that makes any sense.

Was yours of 'The Well' in the city?
Bad memory, but that should have won.

Why are you guys still listening to him>

He's a dummy.

Cub!st wrote:
> Hedfix you should maybe try reading my post before slating it.

Why? You're a teenager and by your own definition you're not even fit to lick my shoes.

I don't
> understand it? You tool.

No it appears to have passed through your brain without doing anything apart from setting off the jealous-little-'I'm stupid therefore everyone else is' zone.

> I said at the bottom that all his messages
> are easy to comprehend and all Paradox does is try and dress it up
> with big words to give the illusion of deep thought and intelligence.

Oh ok then, well in a similar spirit of honesty: I don't understand a single word you've written.

Read my SSC6 story, you scally-wag.

I'm beginning to hate it, as I normally do.

It's rather fun.

Heh. I use songs in mine a lot. Not neccessarily titles, but lines or ideas.