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I sit here feeling strained, knowing I have the ambition to do something creative of epic proportions. I want to write, I love writing but most of all I want to make a difference with my writing. I want to write something that will live on after I have died for people to remember me by; a timeless classic novel or a book of enduring usefulness.
The though of dying and being forgotten suffocates me. Some people are quite content to live out their life in relative happiness, die and then be forgotten. I want to leave behind me a legacy. I want people to read something I have written and for it to speak volumes to them. I want to make a difference to the lives of people; but I do not know how.
I sit here at my computer most nights with a blank word document open, wanting to begin my masterpiece. Longing for my fingers to spring to life and begin tapping down the jumbles mass of emotion, creativity and vitriol that is my thumping unconscious in a legible fashion. I keep a pen and paper by my bedside in case a dream clarifies what it is I am meant to write about. What I am meant to bring to the world that I feel is going to be so important. If I were a spiritual person I would probably say it was my destiny to convey this message that sits encoded in the back of my mind, always a few inches from the tip of my proverbial tongue; but so far it hasn’t made itself clear enough to scribble down on paper.
My jumbled assortment of poetry, discourses and stories each hold an element of what I am trying to reveal, but the big picture is far from complete. It pains me to think that I may never discover what it is I feel the need to express so badly. I have tried philosophising, stabbing in the dark at huge issues such as the meaning of life or the size of the universe. Issues I feel uncouth of someone of my education to even ponder with any degree of seriousness. But I will continue to explore every issue under the sun until I probe deep enough into my psyche to uncover the message I have to offer the world. Something I need to uncover for the sake of my ever failing sanity.
The though of dying and being forgotten suffocates me. Some people are quite content to live out their life in relative happiness, die and then be forgotten. I want to leave behind me a legacy. I want people to read something I have written and for it to speak volumes to them. I want to make a difference to the lives of people; but I do not know how.
I sit here at my computer most nights with a blank word document open, wanting to begin my masterpiece. Longing for my fingers to spring to life and begin tapping down the jumbles mass of emotion, creativity and vitriol that is my thumping unconscious in a legible fashion. I keep a pen and paper by my bedside in case a dream clarifies what it is I am meant to write about. What I am meant to bring to the world that I feel is going to be so important. If I were a spiritual person I would probably say it was my destiny to convey this message that sits encoded in the back of my mind, always a few inches from the tip of my proverbial tongue; but so far it hasn’t made itself clear enough to scribble down on paper.
My jumbled assortment of poetry, discourses and stories each hold an element of what I am trying to reveal, but the big picture is far from complete. It pains me to think that I may never discover what it is I feel the need to express so badly. I have tried philosophising, stabbing in the dark at huge issues such as the meaning of life or the size of the universe. Issues I feel uncouth of someone of my education to even ponder with any degree of seriousness. But I will continue to explore every issue under the sun until I probe deep enough into my psyche to uncover the message I have to offer the world. Something I need to uncover for the sake of my ever failing sanity.
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I sit here feeling strained, knowing I have the ambition to do something creative of epic proportions. I want to write, I love writing but most of all I want to make a difference with my writing. I want to write something that will live on after I have died for people to remember me by; a timeless classic novel or a book of enduring usefulness.
The though of dying and being forgotten suffocates me. Some people are quite content to live out their life in relative happiness, die and then be forgotten. I want to leave behind me a legacy. I want people to read something I have written and for it to speak volumes to them. I want to make a difference to the lives of people; but I do not know how.
I sit here at my computer most nights with a blank word document open, wanting to begin my masterpiece. Longing for my fingers to spring to life and begin tapping down the jumbles mass of emotion, creativity and vitriol that is my thumping unconscious in a legible fashion. I keep a pen and paper by my bedside in case a dream clarifies what it is I am meant to write about. What I am meant to bring to the world that I feel is going to be so important. If I were a spiritual person I would probably say it was my destiny to convey this message that sits encoded in the back of my mind, always a few inches from the tip of my proverbial tongue; but so far it hasn’t made itself clear enough to scribble down on paper.
My jumbled assortment of poetry, discourses and stories each hold an element of what I am trying to reveal, but the big picture is far from complete. It pains me to think that I may never discover what it is I feel the need to express so badly. I have tried philosophising, stabbing in the dark at huge issues such as the meaning of life or the size of the universe. Issues I feel uncouth of someone of my education to even ponder with any degree of seriousness. But I will continue to explore every issue under the sun until I probe deep enough into my psyche to uncover the message I have to offer the world. Something I need to uncover for the sake of my ever failing sanity.
The though of dying and being forgotten suffocates me. Some people are quite content to live out their life in relative happiness, die and then be forgotten. I want to leave behind me a legacy. I want people to read something I have written and for it to speak volumes to them. I want to make a difference to the lives of people; but I do not know how.
I sit here at my computer most nights with a blank word document open, wanting to begin my masterpiece. Longing for my fingers to spring to life and begin tapping down the jumbles mass of emotion, creativity and vitriol that is my thumping unconscious in a legible fashion. I keep a pen and paper by my bedside in case a dream clarifies what it is I am meant to write about. What I am meant to bring to the world that I feel is going to be so important. If I were a spiritual person I would probably say it was my destiny to convey this message that sits encoded in the back of my mind, always a few inches from the tip of my proverbial tongue; but so far it hasn’t made itself clear enough to scribble down on paper.
My jumbled assortment of poetry, discourses and stories each hold an element of what I am trying to reveal, but the big picture is far from complete. It pains me to think that I may never discover what it is I feel the need to express so badly. I have tried philosophising, stabbing in the dark at huge issues such as the meaning of life or the size of the universe. Issues I feel uncouth of someone of my education to even ponder with any degree of seriousness. But I will continue to explore every issue under the sun until I probe deep enough into my psyche to uncover the message I have to offer the world. Something I need to uncover for the sake of my ever failing sanity.
well at least u know what u want out of life, u want to be immortal not in body but in words, i'm sure that if u keep trying the right words will come to u and u will be content knowing that people will read ur eternal words and that it may make a difference in someones life. keep trying...
:-)
:-)
sleep, you'd be surprised how fun it is.
That's my intelligent contribution of the day.
*walks*
That's my intelligent contribution of the day.
*walks*
It's a bold ambition - to write something that has lasting allure. I would like to achieve something similar, though I'm aware there is a possibility I may not be up to it.
I'm currently writing a novel, but I'm unsure how it'll turn out. It's also worth keeping in mind that creating something 'great' very rarely happens early - having 'something to say' comes from a mixture of honesty, clarity, well-honed practice and experience. So time is important. And time is [hopefully] on all our sides. Don't stress too much on doing it now.
I'm currently writing a novel, but I'm unsure how it'll turn out. It's also worth keeping in mind that creating something 'great' very rarely happens early - having 'something to say' comes from a mixture of honesty, clarity, well-honed practice and experience. So time is important. And time is [hopefully] on all our sides. Don't stress too much on doing it now.
How old are yee, Glove of Blackness?
Black Glove; one day I would love to sit down with you and FFF and combine our trio of disturbed minds to render a fanciful dark, soul chilling piece of discourse.
Hi,
I know just what you are talking about though probably with a little more experience as I have been writing and illustrating books and been published for the past 15 years.
The hardest thing to come up with is originality. I get dispondant when I see so many ideas have already been done, the world seems already to be bursting with creative work. If they stopped all book, film, TV and whatever production now it would still take a lifetime for people to work through humanity's "back catalogue".
Then there are the grim realities of actually doing your project. I don't know your situation but I have 3 kids and a mortgage that makes my eyes water. I have to concentrate on work I have now that pays for it all. To get something like a novel off the ground I would need to save, steal of beg about £30-40,000. It costs that to spend a year writing it and (this is no exaggeration) the best part of another year getting a publisher to take it. Even if one does take it they typically will only pay £2-5,000 on a new unpublished author. Of course there are exceptions, you read about them, publishers in a bidding war over some new chic-lit author... what you don't read are the 1,000s of books that never got published.
Sorry, bit of a downer, and a bit off topic.
Having said all that I still start giant projects that may never get published or even finished and I have a lot of fun doing it. I may never leave an impression on the life of others when I peg out but the point is to enjoy it now.. anyway, you aren't going to be caring when your coffin's lowered into the ground. Strangely I have had very little feedback from my published books even though some have sold well. Where I have had tons of great feedback and genuine expressions of joy at my work is from card-cutout models I designed and sell online.
I say, "Just start". Don't worry for now about whether it's going to be good enough. Ideas will form as you write. Also, I always think of it all as a learning process. You might write half a book then read back and decide it wasn't working and throw it all away.. at least by then you will know what isn't working so you will be closer to what will.
I know what you worry about and I try to put it to the back of my mind and just get on and do it.
I know just what you are talking about though probably with a little more experience as I have been writing and illustrating books and been published for the past 15 years.
The hardest thing to come up with is originality. I get dispondant when I see so many ideas have already been done, the world seems already to be bursting with creative work. If they stopped all book, film, TV and whatever production now it would still take a lifetime for people to work through humanity's "back catalogue".
Then there are the grim realities of actually doing your project. I don't know your situation but I have 3 kids and a mortgage that makes my eyes water. I have to concentrate on work I have now that pays for it all. To get something like a novel off the ground I would need to save, steal of beg about £30-40,000. It costs that to spend a year writing it and (this is no exaggeration) the best part of another year getting a publisher to take it. Even if one does take it they typically will only pay £2-5,000 on a new unpublished author. Of course there are exceptions, you read about them, publishers in a bidding war over some new chic-lit author... what you don't read are the 1,000s of books that never got published.
Sorry, bit of a downer, and a bit off topic.
Having said all that I still start giant projects that may never get published or even finished and I have a lot of fun doing it. I may never leave an impression on the life of others when I peg out but the point is to enjoy it now.. anyway, you aren't going to be caring when your coffin's lowered into the ground. Strangely I have had very little feedback from my published books even though some have sold well. Where I have had tons of great feedback and genuine expressions of joy at my work is from card-cutout models I designed and sell online.
I say, "Just start". Don't worry for now about whether it's going to be good enough. Ideas will form as you write. Also, I always think of it all as a learning process. You might write half a book then read back and decide it wasn't working and throw it all away.. at least by then you will know what isn't working so you will be closer to what will.
I know what you worry about and I try to put it to the back of my mind and just get on and do it.
Thanks a lot for the advice, I'll take it on board :-)
Me too. It seems a widely held ambition to write.
I want to, but as BG said - I'm taking my time.
I want to, but as BG said - I'm taking my time.
Jeez Paradox, it sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself.
You have time, I recommend you keep writing about anything until you find yourself on a path that feels important.
I too would like to do something worth remembering. My great uncle gave Lloyd George the money for his deposit to first stand for parliament, thus enabling the creation of the welfare state. I feel like I have something to live up to :^D
At the moment I'm looking for a contribution I can make, something meaningful, I'll work on putting my ideas across when I've worked out what they are.
However, I do suggest you keep a hand firmly in the writing, it's important to have the ability to make your point, when you work out what it'll be.
I do this by keeping my (fairly basic) html skills moderately polished (although they say you can't polish a Douglas Hurd...), and I've been meaning to start learning Arabic (seems a useful language the way politics are going) - but those linguaphone-type cd courses are expensive, and I'm throwing a lot of my energy into another pursuit at the moment, which makes it hard.
I've had a go at making my point already. I wrote my dissertation (as a law undergraduate) on what I felt was an unjust new law, but the word count prevented it becomming all I wanted.
Then I made a web-site to put my full argument across, but it turned out that nobody gave a toss :^(
Ah well, back to the drawing board.
You have time, I recommend you keep writing about anything until you find yourself on a path that feels important.
I too would like to do something worth remembering. My great uncle gave Lloyd George the money for his deposit to first stand for parliament, thus enabling the creation of the welfare state. I feel like I have something to live up to :^D
At the moment I'm looking for a contribution I can make, something meaningful, I'll work on putting my ideas across when I've worked out what they are.
However, I do suggest you keep a hand firmly in the writing, it's important to have the ability to make your point, when you work out what it'll be.
I do this by keeping my (fairly basic) html skills moderately polished (although they say you can't polish a Douglas Hurd...), and I've been meaning to start learning Arabic (seems a useful language the way politics are going) - but those linguaphone-type cd courses are expensive, and I'm throwing a lot of my energy into another pursuit at the moment, which makes it hard.
I've had a go at making my point already. I wrote my dissertation (as a law undergraduate) on what I felt was an unjust new law, but the word count prevented it becomming all I wanted.
Then I made a web-site to put my full argument across, but it turned out that nobody gave a toss :^(
Ah well, back to the drawing board.
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