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"SSC3 - The Legend of the Mysterious Well"

The Legend of the Mysterious Well

In a small boring country lay a small boring city and in it lay a small boring town and this town was called Zamkastad. Nothing ever happened in Zamkastad. The people wanted a little bit of excitement more than anything but nothing ever happened that was worth noticing. Until one day a young girl called Aaroi suddenly dissapeared. This caused the whole city to be scared and shocked but nobody did anything about it.
Then an amazing piece of evidence was found by a news reporter called Akkaw. He saw some large footprints on the ground and stupidly decided to follow them. He followed them out of the town until they stopped at a small well. He looked closer at the well and saw that 'Aaroi' was painted in blood. He screamed and before he could turn around he was pushed into the well.
Two days later the people of Zamkastad were getting very worried. There was a murderer on the loose. So a top team of detectives had to investigate. There were called Arthy, Ariac and Addeir. They followed the footprints to the well and saw two names written in blood on the side of the well this time. They were 'Aaroi' and 'Akkaw'. The detectives stared into the well and noticed that there was some more writing on the side that said: 'I will kill all with 'A' until I kill the one called Abay.' One of the detectives ran as fast as he could and got away but the other two stayed and thought about it. Then they turned round and were faced with a horrible sight but before they could scream they got pushed into the well.
Once Addeir reached the town he ran into the palace and shouted to the king 'The killer will kill everyone until he kills your daughter!!!' The king and his daughter, Abay, stood up looking shocked. The king thought this was outrageous and ordered the guards to kill the man.
The next day, Abay went missing. The king looked everywhere for her until he saw an old shed which was locked. He ordered the guards to open the shed and when he walked in, he was faced with a horrible sight. Abay was dangling from a rope. She had hung herself. She obviously knew that she was going to die so she commited suicide so that nobody else would die before her. So for hundreds of years the whole town was shocked by the legend of the Mysterious Well.

By Wakka.

Just gave it a quick read through. Stories that don't take too long to read are always refreshing, but I didn't quite enjoy this one. The problem is, Wakka, that if you are going to do such a small tale, it's incredibly hard to write convincingly when your plot is so... epic.

I mean, how on earth can you document a mysterious paranormal murder investigation and the slaughter of everyone in a village with a name beginning with "A" in a few short paragraphs? Try and tone things down in this respect, but there's nothing wrong with writing a story that is a psychological adventure.

For example, I've seen people on this site write stories wherein nothing particularly large happens but due to a revelation, twist or development in the story you can come away feeling you've read something spectacular.

Edgy wrote:
> Wakka wrote:
>
>
> Maybe it was crap but it was my first story I have ever written on
> this forum so I don't know what you guys lke.
>
> The trick is to read what others write.

That was my mistake. I posted first.

Edgy wrote:
> Short stories are stories which don't have the length of a standard
> story.
>
> Therefore, make it as long as you like - My average when I did some
> stories before was 8 pages on Word.

I did a 16 page long post on word which I was going to post to try and win Gameaday but then I got warned.

> But it isn't quantity that counts - it's quality.

Yeah I agree.

Wakka wrote:

>
> Maybe it was crap but it was my first story I have ever written on
> this forum so I don't know what you guys lke.

The trick is to read what others write.

Ashman wrote:
> Wakka wrote:
> It was my first story so I didn't know how long to make it. If it
> was
> too short can I write another one? Did you enjoy it?
>
> One entry per person, and it has absolutely no chance of making the
> top three, sorry.

Fair enough. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I personally feel it was rubbish aswell so I am not offended by your comment. Can I edit it to make it good?

Short stories are stories which don't have the length of a standard story.

Therefore, make it as long as you like - My average when I did some stories before was 8 pages on Word.

But it isn't quantity that counts - it's quality.

Edgy wrote:
> It was the kinda of story I'd expect to read in a child's compendium
> of stories in a short book.
>
> That is why I didn't enjoy it.

Maybe it was crap but it was my first story I have ever written on this forum so I don't know what you guys lke.

That is the second time you have got it the way, Edgy! First I was asking Ineedsleep a question and you got in the way by mistake and now you have done it again!

Wakka wrote:
> It was my first story so I didn't know how long to make it. If it was
> too short can I write another one? Did you enjoy it?

One entry per person, and it has absolutely no chance of making the top three, sorry.

It was my first story so I didn't know how long to make it. If it was too short can I write another one? Did you enjoy it?