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"Off the Cool List"

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Wed 21/01/04 at 23:49
Regular
"TheShiznit.co.uk"
Posts: 6,592
People you think no longer deserve to be considered cool, be it down to terrible film after terrible film, shameless huckstering of god-awful products or just plain old-fashioned lameness.

Samuel L Jackson - What was his last good film? Basic? SWAT? XXX? Changing Lanes? Episode II? Oh no, wait - they were all terrible. And those Barclaycard adverts? Psshh. Get off the list Jackson, and stop humping Quentin's leg.

John Travolta - For much the same reasons as Sammy boy. He might be the fattest man in Hollywood and have his own jumbo jet, but that doesn't give him an excuse to make the big streaming yellow streak of films he's slashed out recently. I honestly can't remember a decent Travolta movie since Get Shorty. And even that wasn't brilliant. Off, fatty.

Harrison Ford - Hasn't made a good movie since 1984 (the year, not the... book). Shagging Ally McBeal doesn't make you cool, it makes you pervy and old. And you can take that earring out too. You look ridiculous.

John Woo - Um... Windtalkers anyone? Paycheck? The Replacement Killers? Mission Impossible 2? Hello? Anyone? FACE/OFF! I DID FACE/OFF, THAT WAS GOOD! Yeah, that was 7 years ago, and starred fatty up there. Don't let the door hit your backside on the way out, SELLOUT.

Laurence Fishburne - Ah, Larry Larry Larry. Sorry, Laurence. You were one of the coolest characters in movie history. Then you went all annoying, put on a crappy jumper and became Jada-Pinkett Smith's lapdog. I believed in you man. Give me the blue pill anyday.
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Wed 21/01/04 at 23:49
Regular
"TheShiznit.co.uk"
Posts: 6,592
People you think no longer deserve to be considered cool, be it down to terrible film after terrible film, shameless huckstering of god-awful products or just plain old-fashioned lameness.

Samuel L Jackson - What was his last good film? Basic? SWAT? XXX? Changing Lanes? Episode II? Oh no, wait - they were all terrible. And those Barclaycard adverts? Psshh. Get off the list Jackson, and stop humping Quentin's leg.

John Travolta - For much the same reasons as Sammy boy. He might be the fattest man in Hollywood and have his own jumbo jet, but that doesn't give him an excuse to make the big streaming yellow streak of films he's slashed out recently. I honestly can't remember a decent Travolta movie since Get Shorty. And even that wasn't brilliant. Off, fatty.

Harrison Ford - Hasn't made a good movie since 1984 (the year, not the... book). Shagging Ally McBeal doesn't make you cool, it makes you pervy and old. And you can take that earring out too. You look ridiculous.

John Woo - Um... Windtalkers anyone? Paycheck? The Replacement Killers? Mission Impossible 2? Hello? Anyone? FACE/OFF! I DID FACE/OFF, THAT WAS GOOD! Yeah, that was 7 years ago, and starred fatty up there. Don't let the door hit your backside on the way out, SELLOUT.

Laurence Fishburne - Ah, Larry Larry Larry. Sorry, Laurence. You were one of the coolest characters in movie history. Then you went all annoying, put on a crappy jumper and became Jada-Pinkett Smith's lapdog. I believed in you man. Give me the blue pill anyday.

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