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No, not the swarthy bowler hatted assassin henchman of Auric Goldfinger.
My odd job.
Like today for instance. Usually a working day consists of posting on here, having several smokes, producing the odd report and generally trying to get women to kiss each other.
Except today. A situation that has been ongoing for almost 2 months now involving a customer exporting to China from Hong Kong.
Various emails/phone calls/letters to Chambers of Commerce, import authorities, port controllers etc trying to smooth things through.
Today I get an email from the Chinese Port Authority telling me they are holding onto a shipment of 950kg because the documents do not tally.
This is clearly rubbish, as all import/export documents are checked before shipping.
Speak to our Hong Kong office and discover that there are no standards for importing to China, and that the customs officer I have been talking to is notorious for witholding shipments and demanding penalty tax of 130% value for incorrect documents.
So what do I have to do? Negotiate a bribe with a Chinese Customs officer to release the goods. He wanted $3,000. $3,000 to release goods that are sitting there under his control. Why $3,000?
Because "ah, dis amount is correct based on da weight ratio and volume capacity of da shipment"
"Well our customer cannot afford $3000, so you will have to keep it"
"We can, ah...negotiate"
Ends up accepting $800 to release the goods.
So today Goatboy has smoked 5 ciggies, drank 2 cokes, read Q and haggled with Chinese Port Authorities over the amount of bribery money they will accept to release goods.
Who says East/West relations are strained?
My odd job.
Like today for instance. Usually a working day consists of posting on here, having several smokes, producing the odd report and generally trying to get women to kiss each other.
Except today. A situation that has been ongoing for almost 2 months now involving a customer exporting to China from Hong Kong.
Various emails/phone calls/letters to Chambers of Commerce, import authorities, port controllers etc trying to smooth things through.
Today I get an email from the Chinese Port Authority telling me they are holding onto a shipment of 950kg because the documents do not tally.
This is clearly rubbish, as all import/export documents are checked before shipping.
Speak to our Hong Kong office and discover that there are no standards for importing to China, and that the customs officer I have been talking to is notorious for witholding shipments and demanding penalty tax of 130% value for incorrect documents.
So what do I have to do? Negotiate a bribe with a Chinese Customs officer to release the goods. He wanted $3,000. $3,000 to release goods that are sitting there under his control. Why $3,000?
Because "ah, dis amount is correct based on da weight ratio and volume capacity of da shipment"
"Well our customer cannot afford $3000, so you will have to keep it"
"We can, ah...negotiate"
Ends up accepting $800 to release the goods.
So today Goatboy has smoked 5 ciggies, drank 2 cokes, read Q and haggled with Chinese Port Authorities over the amount of bribery money they will accept to release goods.
Who says East/West relations are strained?
Page:
No choice and our customer pays it anyway.
Nice bit of bribery there. I wouldn't want to be in your position when you have the auditors round, though.
No, not the swarthy bowler hatted assassin henchman of Auric Goldfinger.
My odd job.
Like today for instance. Usually a working day consists of posting on here, having several smokes, producing the odd report and generally trying to get women to kiss each other.
Except today. A situation that has been ongoing for almost 2 months now involving a customer exporting to China from Hong Kong.
Various emails/phone calls/letters to Chambers of Commerce, import authorities, port controllers etc trying to smooth things through.
Today I get an email from the Chinese Port Authority telling me they are holding onto a shipment of 950kg because the documents do not tally.
This is clearly rubbish, as all import/export documents are checked before shipping.
Speak to our Hong Kong office and discover that there are no standards for importing to China, and that the customs officer I have been talking to is notorious for witholding shipments and demanding penalty tax of 130% value for incorrect documents.
So what do I have to do? Negotiate a bribe with a Chinese Customs officer to release the goods. He wanted $3,000. $3,000 to release goods that are sitting there under his control. Why $3,000?
Because "ah, dis amount is correct based on da weight ratio and volume capacity of da shipment"
"Well our customer cannot afford $3000, so you will have to keep it"
"We can, ah...negotiate"
Ends up accepting $800 to release the goods.
So today Goatboy has smoked 5 ciggies, drank 2 cokes, read Q and haggled with Chinese Port Authorities over the amount of bribery money they will accept to release goods.
Who says East/West relations are strained?
My odd job.
Like today for instance. Usually a working day consists of posting on here, having several smokes, producing the odd report and generally trying to get women to kiss each other.
Except today. A situation that has been ongoing for almost 2 months now involving a customer exporting to China from Hong Kong.
Various emails/phone calls/letters to Chambers of Commerce, import authorities, port controllers etc trying to smooth things through.
Today I get an email from the Chinese Port Authority telling me they are holding onto a shipment of 950kg because the documents do not tally.
This is clearly rubbish, as all import/export documents are checked before shipping.
Speak to our Hong Kong office and discover that there are no standards for importing to China, and that the customs officer I have been talking to is notorious for witholding shipments and demanding penalty tax of 130% value for incorrect documents.
So what do I have to do? Negotiate a bribe with a Chinese Customs officer to release the goods. He wanted $3,000. $3,000 to release goods that are sitting there under his control. Why $3,000?
Because "ah, dis amount is correct based on da weight ratio and volume capacity of da shipment"
"Well our customer cannot afford $3000, so you will have to keep it"
"We can, ah...negotiate"
Ends up accepting $800 to release the goods.
So today Goatboy has smoked 5 ciggies, drank 2 cokes, read Q and haggled with Chinese Port Authorities over the amount of bribery money they will accept to release goods.
Who says East/West relations are strained?
Page: