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"Wanted: Winning lottery ticket"

Any winning ticket with 5 numbers or more (bonus ball would be a bonus) considered, up to £2000 cash paid for pristine specimens. Good money also paid for unclaimed winning scratch cards and pools coupons. Giro cashing service available too, pyramid scheme is subject to popular demand.

Any takers please contact me URGENTLY on:

whatadum*******[email protected]

Thank you

Er yeah for an extra tennor I'll throw that in and Dominquez....

Special price for you my friend!

Ooh, ooh, does he come in quad-bypass?

Give you a tenner for it.

Or if you want, a tennor: Pavarotti slightly shop soiled, will do Nessa Dorma for Hula Hoops on request.

Bah! I should have started this first, afterall I am a poor student. now The Saggy One is gonna get all the cash.

I've got next weeks winning ticket if you want it *crosses fingers*

Any winning ticket with 5 numbers or more (bonus ball would be a bonus) considered, up to £2000 cash paid for pristine specimens. Good money also paid for unclaimed winning scratch cards and pools coupons. Giro cashing service available too, pyramid scheme is subject to popular demand.

Any takers please contact me URGENTLY on:

whatadum*******[email protected]

Thank you