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Further to our recent communications when I promised to send 30000 more of our troops to the Gulf to help you to get control of the Iraqi oilwells from that nasty Mr Hussein, I'm sorry to say that we have a little bit of a problem.
Them selfish firemen have decided that they will go on strike after all and unfortunatley I am going to need the troops here in case we have any fires. It will also give me chance to get a bit of public support behind the troops when they see what a good job they do.
Maybe you could put the war off for a couple of weeks ?
Yours Faithfully.
Tony.
Them selfish firemen have decided that they will go on strike after all and unfortunatley I am going to need the troops here in case we have any fires. It will also give me chance to get a bit of public support behind the troops when they see what a good job they do.
Maybe you could put the war off for a couple of weeks ?
Yours Faithfully.
Tony.
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POP.
Dear Snuggers,
Shut yore mowf muvvaf*kka! Oi act like de in-tell-eckt-ual, but oi is in fact an 'ard nut! Noaw, giv me wun GAD for de witty abuv-yu-orl reply, and yu will 'ave orl yore legs bye mornin. Deal?
Loves
~~Belldandy~~
Shut yore mowf muvvaf*kka! Oi act like de in-tell-eckt-ual, but oi is in fact an 'ard nut! Noaw, giv me wun GAD for de witty abuv-yu-orl reply, and yu will 'ave orl yore legs bye mornin. Deal?
Loves
~~Belldandy~~
Dear foo Saddam.
I pity the foo who won't let the US government see you hidden weapons, as I hate you for everything you done to my A- Team. Either you let them see them foo and start the next neclear war on you, or I'll come over there and kick your A$s personally foo.
P.S Do not steal my Gold foo, it's for stroking purposes only.
Faithfully Mr T.
I pity the foo who won't let the US government see you hidden weapons, as I hate you for everything you done to my A- Team. Either you let them see them foo and start the next neclear war on you, or I'll come over there and kick your A$s personally foo.
P.S Do not steal my Gold foo, it's for stroking purposes only.
Faithfully Mr T.
Dearest Public
I as your leader feel the need tospeak out at the attrocities of late.
As you all in your magnificent inteligence will surely know there is 1 regime that has constantly defied our wishes.
We sent the inspectors in and they feel we need change, major change, yet they continue to hold out on us, refusing our resonable demands.
They have even had the audacity to strike us first and again and again.
Yet fear not, we will not lead you to war with them as we are flying in a respected leader to deal with them, I will present to you Bill Clinton.
Nuclear war with these firefighters is not yet an option, as we have no intention of giving the 'button' to Prescott.
I thank you citizens of this fine and prosperous country for your time and patience
Always in your service
Alistair Campbell
PS. The Iraq situation is a problem inherited from the previous conservative government and so all blame for our actions over this should be leveled at their door.
I as your leader feel the need tospeak out at the attrocities of late.
As you all in your magnificent inteligence will surely know there is 1 regime that has constantly defied our wishes.
We sent the inspectors in and they feel we need change, major change, yet they continue to hold out on us, refusing our resonable demands.
They have even had the audacity to strike us first and again and again.
Yet fear not, we will not lead you to war with them as we are flying in a respected leader to deal with them, I will present to you Bill Clinton.
Nuclear war with these firefighters is not yet an option, as we have no intention of giving the 'button' to Prescott.
I thank you citizens of this fine and prosperous country for your time and patience
Always in your service
Alistair Campbell
PS. The Iraq situation is a problem inherited from the previous conservative government and so all blame for our actions over this should be leveled at their door.
You wouldn't think it, but Osama and Suddam hate each other.
Bah, don't ask me why though, for I cannot remember.
Bah, don't ask me why though, for I cannot remember.
Dear 'Jokesters'
I find this so-called humour confusing. First you ask why a chicken is crossing a road. This is ridiculous, a chicken would not be living in a built-up area. Perhaps you mean a rural road? Still the question is ridiculous, because the chicken would just stay on its farm. In any case a chicken has no independent thoughts, just a series of instincts and impulses: it does not know why it crosses the road. Please explain.
Yours,
Professor Belldandy
Dept. of Acceptable Humour
University of Life
I find this so-called humour confusing. First you ask why a chicken is crossing a road. This is ridiculous, a chicken would not be living in a built-up area. Perhaps you mean a rural road? Still the question is ridiculous, because the chicken would just stay on its farm. In any case a chicken has no independent thoughts, just a series of instincts and impulses: it does not know why it crosses the road. Please explain.
Yours,
Professor Belldandy
Dept. of Acceptable Humour
University of Life
Belldandy wrote:
>Goatboy got a GAD for his and you're all following like sheep....
>
> ~~Belldandy~~
Dear me,
What's the obsession with people's gonads?
Yours,
R. P R B Lee-Shrivled.
>Goatboy got a GAD for his and you're all following like sheep....
>
> ~~Belldandy~~
Dear me,
What's the obsession with people's gonads?
Yours,
R. P R B Lee-Shrivled.
Dear Dubya,
In order to stem the tide of communist satirical humour from these pinkos that are not grateful to be living in a democracy - which in itself gives people the right to disagree and dissent with the politik groupthink, I have decided to deploy the latest super-weapon:
The Belldandy.
It is a worm-virus that infiltrates discussion based on cynical leftist humour and attempts to grind it to a halt with disdainful comment and an elitist attitude of boredom.
I think you'll find it useful, just deploy in chatrooms and message boards and soon enough you'll discover alt.groups solely dedicated to a Village of The Damned-like "War is good. War is inevitable. One of us"
Cheers Fatty
Tony
In order to stem the tide of communist satirical humour from these pinkos that are not grateful to be living in a democracy - which in itself gives people the right to disagree and dissent with the politik groupthink, I have decided to deploy the latest super-weapon:
The Belldandy.
It is a worm-virus that infiltrates discussion based on cynical leftist humour and attempts to grind it to a halt with disdainful comment and an elitist attitude of boredom.
I think you'll find it useful, just deploy in chatrooms and message boards and soon enough you'll discover alt.groups solely dedicated to a Village of The Damned-like "War is good. War is inevitable. One of us"
Cheers Fatty
Tony
Bah - who let Belldandy in here ?
Dear Mr Snuggly,
I note with interest that I haven't won Oil a Day for several months now. Why? I have put several aircraft carriers within range of your corporate HQ. I have sent a team of scientists into your shop, looking for trading standards violations. I have made threats of extreme violence. If the situation doesn't change radically then I will no longer prop up your puppet regime and bomb you back into the 8-bit age.
All the best,
Dubya
I note with interest that I haven't won Oil a Day for several months now. Why? I have put several aircraft carriers within range of your corporate HQ. I have sent a team of scientists into your shop, looking for trading standards violations. I have made threats of extreme violence. If the situation doesn't change radically then I will no longer prop up your puppet regime and bomb you back into the 8-bit age.
All the best,
Dubya
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