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Four men sit apon four chairs. The night sky falls apon them, and although they don't realise it, night is apon us.
"Hail Brother Ant." SHEEPY said. "What does thou bring us in this time of woe?"
"Hail Brother." Ant replied. "I bring news of a game."
"What game is this you speak of?" Said I.
"It is the one true game. The one that will bind us all." Ant reached into his sack, and withdrew thy press release.
"It is what I've always dreamed of, and yet, my dreams never seem so real." Said I.
"It is of true beauty." Said Ant.
"An online RPG?" Inquired Snipe. "What's so good about an online RPG?"
Ant and I gave Snipe an evil look.
"You do not see the whole picture, misguided one." I remarked.
"Certainly not." Ant stared at the game again. "Lord Lucas would not be pleased to hear of such blasphemy."
"Lord Lucas? What the hell are you lot blabbing on about anyway?"
"Behold. The Star Wars Online RPG is being developed, and you can now sign up for the beta testing."
"I shall not wait to do so. Goodbye gentlemen." Said I.
Snipe continued to argue with Ant and Sheepy well into the night, until Ant withdrew his +5 attack Lightsaber, and Sheepy attacked Snipe with his +15 force grip.
"Hail Brother Ant." SHEEPY said. "What does thou bring us in this time of woe?"
"Hail Brother." Ant replied. "I bring news of a game."
"What game is this you speak of?" Said I.
"It is the one true game. The one that will bind us all." Ant reached into his sack, and withdrew thy press release.
"It is what I've always dreamed of, and yet, my dreams never seem so real." Said I.
"It is of true beauty." Said Ant.
"An online RPG?" Inquired Snipe. "What's so good about an online RPG?"
Ant and I gave Snipe an evil look.
"You do not see the whole picture, misguided one." I remarked.
"Certainly not." Ant stared at the game again. "Lord Lucas would not be pleased to hear of such blasphemy."
"Lord Lucas? What the hell are you lot blabbing on about anyway?"
"Behold. The Star Wars Online RPG is being developed, and you can now sign up for the beta testing."
"I shall not wait to do so. Goodbye gentlemen." Said I.
Snipe continued to argue with Ant and Sheepy well into the night, until Ant withdrew his +5 attack Lightsaber, and Sheepy attacked Snipe with his +15 force grip.
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Emperor Tony was sitting on his throne, licking his lips. "Hmm, tasty!" he murmured, spitting out the last piece of Ewok skin.
Darth Sheepy grimaced and flicked the piece of skin from his shiny toe-cap.
"Emperor," he hazarded, "Why are we here on this Godforsaken planet?"
"All will be revealed, in time, Darth."
"But there's nothing here! I want my revenge on the rebels for destroying the Death Star!"
"IN TIME! Have patience. The flow of the Force within me tells me that the rebels will be arriving here soon to get supplies. Or maybe it was that curry I had last night. Either way, we can ambush them when they arrive."
Darth Sheepy was not convinced and walked over to the holo screen. A quick wave of his hand over the console brought up the latest statistics for the troops he had deployed around the Empire's base.
1,000 Stormtroopers, the elite of the elite. All battle hardened veterans of the Klintosh uprising. All bloodthirsty. They needed a break, a bit of R&R. Darth Sheepy ordered 2,000 party buckets from Kentucky Fried Wookie and 4,000 litres of Diet Pepsi. That should give them something to chew on whilst they awaited the rebels.
The Dark side of the force seethed within him. He would be avenged.
(To be continued....)
Darth Sheepy grimaced and flicked the piece of skin from his shiny toe-cap.
"Emperor," he hazarded, "Why are we here on this Godforsaken planet?"
"All will be revealed, in time, Darth."
"But there's nothing here! I want my revenge on the rebels for destroying the Death Star!"
"IN TIME! Have patience. The flow of the Force within me tells me that the rebels will be arriving here soon to get supplies. Or maybe it was that curry I had last night. Either way, we can ambush them when they arrive."
Darth Sheepy was not convinced and walked over to the holo screen. A quick wave of his hand over the console brought up the latest statistics for the troops he had deployed around the Empire's base.
1,000 Stormtroopers, the elite of the elite. All battle hardened veterans of the Klintosh uprising. All bloodthirsty. They needed a break, a bit of R&R. Darth Sheepy ordered 2,000 party buckets from Kentucky Fried Wookie and 4,000 litres of Diet Pepsi. That should give them something to chew on whilst they awaited the rebels.
The Dark side of the force seethed within him. He would be avenged.
(To be continued....)
Meanwhile, far away on the moon planet of Endor, a young Ewok strolled joyfully through the forest. He skipped along, humming a tune. Looking to his left he saw that one of his traps had been activated!
The young Ewok sprinted towards the clearing, only to see the net in tatters. What creature could escape from such strong bindings?
It didn't take too long for this poor Ewok to discover this, as he turned to face his doom.
Later that day, as the suns were setting in the sky the Ewok search party reached the clearing.
At first everything seemed normal, until Chief Chirpa noticed a twitching coming from within the bushes.
He rushed over, and looked inside. What he saw was one of the most horrific sights even to pass his eyes, an Ewok, skinned, yet still alive.
There was a new evil in town....
The young Ewok sprinted towards the clearing, only to see the net in tatters. What creature could escape from such strong bindings?
It didn't take too long for this poor Ewok to discover this, as he turned to face his doom.
Later that day, as the suns were setting in the sky the Ewok search party reached the clearing.
At first everything seemed normal, until Chief Chirpa noticed a twitching coming from within the bushes.
He rushed over, and looked inside. What he saw was one of the most horrific sights even to pass his eyes, an Ewok, skinned, yet still alive.
There was a new evil in town....
But instead of using the Force, Grix called upon more sinister powers from his second brain.
(Me?)
Yes, you.
He used the power of.......Gameaday. And won.
Darth Sheepy stood defeated. The multitude of the Galaxy were in uproar. Sniper turned from his position guarding the Throne Room entrance and said:
"But that wasn't a REVIEW!"
FantasyMeister and Ant hit the intercom from the bridge and could be heard laughing and cheering.
"Well done Jedi Grix!" they shouted.
In all the commotion, no one had noticed that Darkness was lying mortally wounded from a bizarre breathing accident.
(To be continued....)
(Me?)
Yes, you.
He used the power of.......Gameaday. And won.
Darth Sheepy stood defeated. The multitude of the Galaxy were in uproar. Sniper turned from his position guarding the Throne Room entrance and said:
"But that wasn't a REVIEW!"
FantasyMeister and Ant hit the intercom from the bridge and could be heard laughing and cheering.
"Well done Jedi Grix!" they shouted.
In all the commotion, no one had noticed that Darkness was lying mortally wounded from a bizarre breathing accident.
(To be continued....)
Jedi Grix stepped over the smouldering remains of the dead Stormtroopers and confronted Darth Sheepy, who was still struggling to get the Evil Emperor Tony untangled from his cape.
"So, YOU are the traitor to the Alliance! You certainly pulled the wool over our eyes!"
Darth Sheepy winced at the pun. It hurt like a slap on his flank. He breathed deeply into his helmet. Quite difficult to do when you are standing up....never mind.
"I have always had the Dark side of the Force with me," he snarled back. "The Force is stronger within me than you could ever imagine. The Rebel Alliance will crumble before the might of my Empire."
A muffled voice from beneath the cape muttered: "Oi! That's MY Empire you are talking about kiddo!"
With a sudden move Darth Sheepy whisked out his light saber and zchwoomed it down onto the Emperor's head, knocking him out cold. He turned slowly to face Grix once again. "The time is now. The place is here. We FIGHT!" At this he started to advance on Grix, who performed a quick double back flip whilst whipping out his own light sabre and flicking it to 'on'. There was a click, and instead of the 4' pink light beam there was just a fizzle.
"Damn," muttered Grix. "Anyone got a light? Quick! Ant and FantasyMeister, run and get the core detonation codes from the mainframe computer on the first deck, and Sniper and Darkness, guard that door and shoot anything that moves towards it!"
Ant and FantasyMeister ran out of the Emperor's Throneroom to do his bidding, and Darkness threw Grix a Zippo before turning with Sniper to guard the entrance.
As Darth Sheepy stepped towards him, Grix deftly lit his sabre, discarded the Zippo and rounded on Darth with the words:
"Strike me down, Darth Sheepy, and I shall become more powerful that you can ever imagine!"
"Pardon?" Yoda's voice drifted through the room from light years away. "Oh! Only kidding. I heard you the first time. Don't forget, Grix! Use the force!"
(To be continued....)
"So, YOU are the traitor to the Alliance! You certainly pulled the wool over our eyes!"
Darth Sheepy winced at the pun. It hurt like a slap on his flank. He breathed deeply into his helmet. Quite difficult to do when you are standing up....never mind.
"I have always had the Dark side of the Force with me," he snarled back. "The Force is stronger within me than you could ever imagine. The Rebel Alliance will crumble before the might of my Empire."
A muffled voice from beneath the cape muttered: "Oi! That's MY Empire you are talking about kiddo!"
With a sudden move Darth Sheepy whisked out his light saber and zchwoomed it down onto the Emperor's head, knocking him out cold. He turned slowly to face Grix once again. "The time is now. The place is here. We FIGHT!" At this he started to advance on Grix, who performed a quick double back flip whilst whipping out his own light sabre and flicking it to 'on'. There was a click, and instead of the 4' pink light beam there was just a fizzle.
"Damn," muttered Grix. "Anyone got a light? Quick! Ant and FantasyMeister, run and get the core detonation codes from the mainframe computer on the first deck, and Sniper and Darkness, guard that door and shoot anything that moves towards it!"
Ant and FantasyMeister ran out of the Emperor's Throneroom to do his bidding, and Darkness threw Grix a Zippo before turning with Sniper to guard the entrance.
As Darth Sheepy stepped towards him, Grix deftly lit his sabre, discarded the Zippo and rounded on Darth with the words:
"Strike me down, Darth Sheepy, and I shall become more powerful that you can ever imagine!"
"Pardon?" Yoda's voice drifted through the room from light years away. "Oh! Only kidding. I heard you the first time. Don't forget, Grix! Use the force!"
(To be continued....)
I'll over pop this top.
I think I'll POP this great story bact to the TOP.
I was joking about ant, i can write better stories than that!
What will happen???
Find out tomorrow.
PS- We should let FM and Darkness tell some of it tomorrow. Not Sniper though, he'll just muck it up. But only Grix' knows who his son is. TELL ME!!
Find out tomorrow.
PS- We should let FM and Darkness tell some of it tomorrow. Not Sniper though, he'll just muck it up. But only Grix' knows who his son is. TELL ME!!
Just as Grix finished his sentance, about 10 Stormtroopers ran in, and started shooting.
The Jedis produced the Lightsabers, and deflected the blows.
While Grix, Ant and FM-the best fighters, stepped forwatd to slash down some of the troopers, Darkness and Sniper stayed back and deflected the blows.
After some slashing and deflecting, all the troopers were dead. There were no injuries, apart from when Ant's last bag of sugar got hit, and Ant was beginning to hyperventilate.
"Calm yourself, Ant," Darkness said.
More troopers were heard coming.
"We have to get out of here now!!" FM shouted
The Jedis produced the Lightsabers, and deflected the blows.
While Grix, Ant and FM-the best fighters, stepped forwatd to slash down some of the troopers, Darkness and Sniper stayed back and deflected the blows.
After some slashing and deflecting, all the troopers were dead. There were no injuries, apart from when Ant's last bag of sugar got hit, and Ant was beginning to hyperventilate.
"Calm yourself, Ant," Darkness said.
More troopers were heard coming.
"We have to get out of here now!!" FM shouted
The story will progress. But tommorrow.
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