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"My long confusing day of crime"

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Mon 19/08/02 at 09:09
Regular
Posts: 787
Hey my name is Joseph. I have today all planned out. I have five dollars and I have to make it to my familly reunion at 8:00. It's goin to be great in my familly reunion, I havent seen any of my familly since a car accident I had. Well, I think I should be goin now I need to buy a small gift for my parents at least.

Quickly, I run to my car and start my car. I could hear the engine was kind of rusty and I probably had to fix it soon. As I drive threw the city I realize a gang of men mugging a elderly lady on the corner. How can some people be so heartless to do such a thing. I make it to the store in a matter of a minute. I get out of my car and and slowly walk to threw the front doors. As soon as I enter a "I'm back" greeting card catches my eyes an an instan. Slowly I inch my way toward it and read it. It was a great card and i had to have it.

I go to the front desk and give the man the card and my five dollar bill. "That's $7.50" he says in a low voice. "But i only have 5 dollars. $7.50 is way to much" I declare. "Either pay up or get out" he yells in a rude voice. As he yelled a I felt all my muscles tense and I was feeling extremly angry. All I wanted to do is get a simple card now he is screaming about kicking me out of the store!! A spark just blew in my head and I picked up a baseball bat that was laying next to the front desk. I wave the bat in the mans face and yell "Give me the card!!!". He throws me the card and I beat him once across the head no perminit damage was done. I backed up toward the the kepping my eyes on his terrified face and keeping my hands on the card and the bat.

I avoid my car and just start to run. Why did I do that, is there something wrong with me. I ran and ran toward the derection of my familly's house untill I met up with the same men that were mugging the old women. "Give me all you got dude" they said while pointing a small knife at me. Without half a thought I swung the bat madly and knocked out all 3 men. As they all layed there on the floor I threw the bat down on the floor and stood there motionless. In a slit second I picked up there knife and ran off toward my families yet again.

I was a block away from the house I knew if I was there this would all end but then out of the blue a policeman comes and says freeze. As if I didnt even see him I sliced his arm. He screamed loadly and all I could do to make him be quite is get his gun and shoot his leg. I dont know why I thought that would work. I let go of the knife and kept the card and the gun in one hand as I ran into the house that I was hoping to go to all day.

In front of me was my familly in front of a casket with pictures of me circling around them. "Whats all this?" I yell. All together they turn around and gasp. "No this can't be you died in a car crash" my mother said franticly. "No I didnt you didn't even try to find out if I really did" I yelled as I waved the gun in there faces. They all scream at the sight of the gun. I didn't know what came over me but I shot away at them untill they were all silent and I think dead. I drop the gun on the floor and thoought why did this killing instanct come to me today. I close my eyes and start to cry uncontrollably. Then slowly I open my eyes to see I still had the card in my hands. Then as I weeped I managed to whisper to myself " I'm Back". And then I layed on the floor silently for what seemed like a enternaty. Just sitting there silent.
Mon 19/08/02 at 20:43
Regular
"sweats salad dressi"
Posts: 4,599
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH


curse my un knowing ways

w/e i will just bye a mub clog
Mon 19/08/02 at 20:42
Posts: 4,686
this may be stating the obvious but we live in britain
Mon 19/08/02 at 20:39
Regular
"Hmmm....."
Posts: 12,243
You use NTSC games.

We use PAL games.

So if you won a game from this site, you wouldnt be able to play it on your NTSC machine.

That is of course if you live in America and have an NTSC console (duh).
Mon 19/08/02 at 20:36
Regular
"sweats salad dressi"
Posts: 4,599
Wait wait wait


What are PAL games???????


Is it like that americans cant play them cause an evil force?????


tell meeeeeeeee
Mon 19/08/02 at 18:53
Regular
Posts: 6,801
Back to the bottle our bovine friend, drink away merrily and another story will come soon! Its better than your usual posts anyway. I think your family should be quite afraid/disown you.
Mon 19/08/02 at 13:52
Regular
"That's right!"
Posts: 10,645
Yes, he claims he's American

No GADs for him then (unless he can play PAL games)
Mon 19/08/02 at 12:35
Posts: 0
It reminded me very much of the film 'Falling Down' with Michael Douglas.

He beats the living daylights out of a store owner because he charges too much for a can of drink or something.
Mon 19/08/02 at 12:31
Regular
"Chavez, just hush.."
Posts: 11,080
I'm confused here...

Drunk Cow, are you American?

If so, fine...

But if you're not, why did you use american terms, 'I was a block away from my house' and why did you use the currancy of dollars?

Just wondering because this looks rather suspicious...
Mon 19/08/02 at 12:28
Regular
"bit of a brain"
Posts: 18,933
I don't think it was supposed to be a funny story. Oh, wait, No, I can see the comedy: "I started shooting my family".
Hilarious.
Mon 19/08/02 at 12:24
Regular
"Hmmm....."
Posts: 12,243
Give this man a GAD, he makes me laugh.......

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